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i'm so confused, found out 2 weeks ago that i'm pregnant, told my man of 2 years who wasn't over the moon just like i wasn't.

i booked in for an abortion but couldn't go through with now ex has gone mental and said the most horrendous things to me.

i will never forgive him for what he has said but am i being selfish keeping the baby, i told him i want nothing from him and will never contact him. 


No, you are not being selfish. He is the one being selfish. You are being mature in facing up to your responsibilities. At least you have now found out what that 'man' is really like. (I assume he is the father of the child.)

However to say "i will never forgive him for what he has said" may cause bitterness and resentment which will not help in your pregnancy and motherhood. Forgiveness is liberating, but that does not mean you condone nor necessarily forget what was said. Nor does forgiveness mean you have to resume a relationship.

Where are you? There are many places where there is help for single mothers/mothers-to-be.

I hope this helps as a start.



It sounds like you made the right decision for you. If you went through with it, you seem to be a person who wants a family and would probably be suffering great regret and post abortion stress ( I have been there) which would most likely have ended your relationship anyway.

What seems like a rational decision can change you. You really don't know how you will feel after an abortion. Some people are OK with it, others are not. You just don't know how you will react, but usually if you feel you want to be a mother and have the means to be ( not on drugs, are not desperately poor or homeless, not with an abusive partner), it is best to be a mother.  

Give your partner and yourself time to come to terms with it and accept you now has a family. It seems like you were in a good relationship and he is a reasonable person (although it may not seem like it now). If you had a loving relationship before and talked of a future there is no reason why you can not be together again. Unplanned pregnancy always brings a lot of stress and often snap decisions, arguments and actions that you and he later regret.. It takes time to sort out your feelings and emotions, but you will.