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I had a medical abortion at 7 weeks back in August. I went and did the abortion eventhou I felt attachment to the baby. I felt it was necessary to do it because the baby was a product of incest. Currently 13 weeks and 3 days pregnant and ever since I found out I was pregnant I have not a second of peace. I don't feel any attachment to this baby like I felt for the first one. My first abortion hurt me deeply and got very depressed and there I go and get pregnant again, same man. But like I said I feel no attachment to this other baby. I really wonder if having the abortion would hurt me emotionally since I don't feel attachment to this other baby. I think the first abortion hurt me because I felt attachment to the baby. This time I don't. And I wonder if having an abortion will hurt me emotionally since the feelings for the baby are different. People will judge me, I know. But having a child from incest its chaos. I don't want my family to find out. And now I feel much more conscious of the problems this will bring to me and to the baby. I really don’t feel I can handle people finding out who the father is. I would like to start over. Do things right. Someday meet a man and have a relationship accepted by society. Or just live my life and get this man out of my life. I also have like a thousand other problems. No one to help me take care of the baby and I need to get a job. Plus I don’t expect help from anyone since I’m ashamed of how this child was conceived. My mother knows I’m pregnant but does not know who the father is. I can’t tell her. She will be hurt.Mom tells me that once I have the child in my arms my feelings will change. But she does not know this chills is a product of incest! I’m afraid that if the baby is born everybody will find out. I want the abortion but I feel guilty having a second abortion. I know the child is already fomed. It makes me feel guilty to kill it. But is this the right way to give life to a child!
I’m also afraid that I’m too far a long and will suffer physical damage. I know a couple of places that do first trimester abortion up to 14 weeks. I need to decide soon!!!

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look this is a topic that plenty of people have been discussing for years now and although some people might have different veiws on what I'm going to say I definetely think you should keep the baby, even if it is a child of incest.....the thing is that you need to take responsibility for your actions and not take the easy way out all the time, cause who knows you could be killing this baby and get another one and not feel a thing for the next on and get an abortion just because you think its convenient, I mean if evenyone chose the easy way and convienient way out, then they could have just launched some nuclear bombs and blown up the other countries.....I am a very religious person and looking at it from this perspective God does not allow pity kills (killing a person when he is suffering to end his suffering) I know that the reason he doesn't want pity kills is because (assuming you belive in God) didn't you ever think that God might have wanted that person to suffer, that that suffering could be the thing that leads him straight to salvation? you have a life in the palm of your hand right now, in a sense, you are god to your own child right now, if God wanted you to be dead before you appeared on this Earth then he could have done it a while ago, but he gave you a CHANCE TO LIVE, he didn't care what he thought about you if he liked you or not or if you would ruin the world somehow, he gave you a chance to live on this earth and see how you chose to live life, do you really want to kill another baby before he has the chance to live, before he has his first time to crawl, or walk, or say his first words, or even say "I love you"??? you made this mistake and now you have to take responsibility for it, cause even though if you take the easy way out and have an abortion, there is no way that years from now you are going to be able to handle the greif and guilt that you are no better than the people that brought the Jews to the concentration camps, or no better than the people who killed millions in genocides around the world, or no better than a policeman leading an innocent prisoner to his death.......no matter what happens you have to decide whether to save this child or not, the embarrasment will be great, but not as great as you knowing that you killed an innocent life because of your own selfish reasons....you need to step up and take responsibility for this, cause if you don't then it will bite you in the ass later on, cause even though people don't like you having a child of incest, even more people will hate you and criticize you for choosing to get an abortion


sorry went a little insane on that topic but that's probably a summary of m opinion.....I have more reasons why you shouldn't I just can't remember them right now, but before you choose what you are going to do think about this......even though most people think that getting an abortion early is right since the baby is not fully developed, the baby can still feel pain, and if you look up pictures of it it will definetely change your mind cause the looks on the unborn baby's faces is just horrible to see.....I really implore you to keep the baby no matter what keep him and give him a chance to live...
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I thank you for your response and don't be sorry that you feel you went insane on the topic. I apreciatte your beliefs and yes, I thought about all that. I also have other reasons: financial issues, no one to help me take care of the baby, and I have an illness that can be aggravated with the pregnancy. I know, you will still tell me to keep the child. But there's a final issue. Since the beginning of the pregnancy I been having extreme nausea and vomiting and it keeps getting worse. I went to the Doctor and no help. I was given medication and like I said instead of getting better I'm getting worse. Even the water I drink I vomit. I'm not lying! I lost 10 pounds in less than 2 weeks already. I been dizzy throught out the whole pregnancy and I'm sick 23 to 24 hours a day. Can't even sit down and even being in bed makes me feel dizzy. My mom is against abortion but she has been seeing me so sick lately that she feels the baby might not even be healthy. And yes, with an ultrasound I had, it looks like the baby is not growing as it should. And is not the easy way out to me I'm lost my sanity now. But I'm also loosing my health, and being physically ill how I am I can't even believe the bay is growing normally. I can't keep food down.
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well the symptoms that you are talking about are really just the same ones that my mom had when she was having my little brother.....nausea, vomiting, sick 24/7, dizziness.......and just one little thing you said "...and being physically ill how I am I can't even believe the baby is growing normally." well just because you don't believe that the baby is growing normally doesn't mean that it isn't, you need to have faith that the baby is going to turn out alright, cause like I said....you made this mistake and now you have to face the consequences.....I mean you have to have this baby so that you can learn through, sorry to say, pain both physically and mentally, because if you take the easy way out, then what is going to stop you from having sex with him again except knowing that you can get an abortion if you get pregnant again?.....its your choice.....like I said I am all together against it.....its your choice.....do you want to go the easy way and never learn from this experiance.....or do you want to learn from it and next time when it does happen that you will have something to stop you before anything can happen? its your call
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I think you need to think about what you want for yourself. I had an abortion and will regret it for the rest of my life, but many people really believe it is the best decision for them. i personally think if you do keep this baby you will never be free from the relationship that you are in. And it is also a well known fact that children of incest are many times more likely to have serious health problems including retardation. You should think about that a little bit . And like i said do what is best for you, just be sure it is the right decision, because once you have an abortion you can't take it back.
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baddecisions08 is not the easy way out as Mrs Juanjohnguy has stated. As I had mentioned I had an abortion from this relationship before and is the worst emotional pain I ever felt in my life. And I don't wish that on anyone. I really felt attached to this first child from the moment I found out I was pregnant. And if hadn't been for the incest part of it I would not have done it. Illness is another reason that can lead you to abortion because what good it does to endanger the mother's life! The mother should survive to take care of her child. I don't think I even agree with abortion because or rape. So when I had the abortion with my first child I didn't do it to protect me or because I was ashamed. I did it to save my child suffering from the people around him (because of being a kid from an incest relationship and people pointinh at him/her) and not to cause the family any pain. I didn't even think about the pain I would feel. I just knew I didn't want to do it. And that was the worse decision I ever made in my life. It wasn't even a decision. I jut thought I had to do it for the sake of the family. I went throught the abortion with my first child and didn't even think the whole situation throught. I just tought I will avoid the family lots of suffering. Now with this second child I'm really thinking about the whole situation. Something I should have done before with my first child. Not to get into this situation again.But we are humans and unfortunately are not perfect. We end up hurting ourselves in the process. I feel that this child will suffer once he/she finds out who the are his/her parents, and that's my main concern. Also the family will suffer. Yes, this is why I had the abortion the first time but was a quick decision where a didn't process things very well. This tine is really hitting me. And I see more clearly now that is a bad bad environment for the child. Kids suffer. Imagine my child knowing he came from incest! Because eventually someone will find out. I'm positive. Unfortunately before you get pregnant you are not thinking right. Many things confuse your mind. And this time around I also have gotten very sick. Just can't keep food down. I vomit everything I eat, even water can't keep down. And honestly I don't have the energy to move a finger. I stopped looking for a job cause I can't move. I can' even sit down unless drive. They gave a medication for the nausea and vomitng, which is extremely severe, but I''m not able to take it because it can make a tumor I have grow. If the tumor grows I might have to deliver early or I can go blind. I have many issues going on and the pain of having to make a decision. I know how bad abortion hurts and is very unfortunate that my firsts pregnancy experiences had to be like this. I thank you for your responses and aprecciate all your thoughts sincerely.
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I'm in the process of finding out for sure if my uncle fathered me. I'm 27 years old; I've known it was a good possibility for the last 3 years. I have no regret of being alive! My mother CHOSE to have me despite the fact that her brother raped her. I just want to encourage you that a child of incest will not necessarily end up deformed. I graduated in the top 6% of my class and am now married with a very healthy little boy of my own and another on the way! I praise God that my mother chose to have me!! If you can't handle the raising this child, there's always adoption - it's a choice of love for your unborn child. Your child can't speak for yourself, so on his or her behalf, I implore you, as a child of incest myself, to give this beautiful child a chance at life!

I don't know if you've already made your choice or not, or have already done anything, but even if you have, know that there is forgiveness! Jesus took the punishment of your wrong doings for you already! Ask Him to forgive you & make Himself real to you. He loves you sooooo very much! I'm praying for you... I know it's not easy!! But your child will thank you someday for your sacrifice of love!! *BIG-HUGS*
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I don't know if this relationship is consensual or not but it's wrong. You need to get out of it. Please, do this for yourself! Get away from this man!! Go to a good counselor and let go of your past and move forward with your life. You deserve far better!!
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I'm so happy to hear from you. It makes me feel so great that you are happy to be alive. I wish I had heard from you before as I went on with the abortion. Is good to hear that someone borned from incest is happy to be alive and not bothered by that fact. During the pregnancy I suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum, which is an extreme form of nausea and morning sickness along with extreme fatigue to the point of not being able to do the simple things. I couldn't even shower, I couldn't drive, I couldn't get ot of bed and I had no help from anyone. I felt so alone! I used to go to the gim everyday and exercise a lot. Did weights, ran, you name it. I felt so weak with the pregnancy that I stopped going to the gim. I forced myself to go a few times and all I did was walk in the treadmill. I know exercising is good during pregnancy but walking to me was very tiring. Despite the fact that I ate very good the first weeks of the pregnancy I still felt very weak. I didn ' have any energy. I even slept most of the day to rest as my body asked for it but no improvement. Hyperemesis Gravidarum is very debilitating and you just can't go on with your daily life. Pregnant women with this condition also suffer from depression. I was an emotional turmoil and wish my pregnancy had been normal nausea and vomiting and tireness but it was far worse. I ended up not being able to hold food. I took medication to avoid vomiting but no help. And it was actually the strongest drug for avoiding vomiting given to patiens that go throught chemotherapy to avoid nausea and vomiting and didn't help me. My mother saw me saw sick that she felt the baby was not healthy but never interfered with my decision. She actually did not want an abortion. I struggle throught the very last minute with the decision but I was so sick that I felt it was like a sign to end the pregnancy. I just felt something inside of me that was telling me it would be ok. But I hated the fact to have to go through an abortion as it was my child. Being so sick I was desperate and even more confused. I had already attached to my baby as I saw the ultrasound. but still I felt deep in my being that my baby was going to suffer if he was borned. Why did I feel that so strongly? Mother's instinct! After the abortion I became healthy right away and my emotions were more at ease and I missed my baby but I also felt I made the right decision but just coulndn't understand why. As my baby was a human being! Why would I feel ok with the decision. I thought that
something had to be wrong with my baby, healthwise. I thought a mother had to had that instinct as I felt at somewaht ok with the decision to abort my baby. My sister also told me that I was not having a normal pregnancy, the father of the baby told me the same thing. Everybody just thought the baby was not healthy. Well, it turns out my ultrasound and blood test done indicated a high risk for Down Syndrome. The hospital even scheduled me for genetic counseling. I did lots of research and foud out that if a woman carries a baby with Down Syndrome the incidence to suffer from Hyperemesis Gravidarum is higher. I also have pictures of the ultrasound and saw a very thick nuchal fold wich indicates Down Syndromne and other chromosomal abnormalities. I was so sick and weak
and not being able to retain food with the pregnancy and finding out my baby had Down Syndrome that I really doubt I had been able to carry to term. I also foud out that up to 85% of fetuses with Down Syndrome are spontaneously aborted. With that and my illness the outcome wouldn't have been good and even ifI had been able to carry the baby to term I woudn't want to see a person go through all the illnesss a person with Down Syndrome suffers. I know a child with Down Syndrome is also a special child but I feel that it was better to let him go than to put him through all the physical illnesses they go through. I guess my instict was right. Don't know if the decision was ok with God but I feel peace and if I feel peace is because God is tight by my side. And I know my baby is in a place where he/she won't suffer. I wish my pregnancy would have been normal. After the abortion and before finding out about the Down Syndrome I blamed the Hyperemesis Gravidarum for the emotional mess I was in and knew that if I hadn't suffered from that I would not have aborted my child. Then I did the research and found out that a lot of women terminate a such a pregnancy as they feel very ill. After that I felt not so guilty anymore I defenetely had proof that I was not emotionally healthy and maybe did the wrong decision but at the same time my instict told me it was an ok decision. So I gues it was. But the Down Syndrome of my baby caused me that illness. It agravated my condition and my emotions but I couldn't avoid it. It was jut that my baby in fact was not healthy. I feel so much love for my child and at peace that he won't suffer anymore.
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Hi. I am trying to find information concerning to effects of abortion from an incestual relationship. I was 15 and now i'm 53. I have terrible mental health problems which have deepened every day of my life. Every time i see a baby the murder i committed hits me in the stomach like a sledge hammer. I have 2 grown children whom I raised alone. We were often homeless and hungry, but we stayed together and they are now doing really well. They know little of my past. I was forced to have the abortion by the group of pedofiles and my father a nd the local dr. I know this may be a different reaction than for some, but still hoping for some more education on the subject. Thank God things are more open now. My mother knew all along. Give a child up for adoption, but never let another influence your choices. Just make believe you have no one else in your life and think about what you would really like to do. You have had total control taken from you with the incest, claim it back for an innocent baby, if not for yourself. any problems others have with it is their excuse not the reason. Thanks and love to all with this connection to me and all the others who know the pain. Georgine
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while i certainly understand ur problem, I just want you too look at it this way,where was your feelings when you was having sex. So now its more about the child then about what people think, you owe her that much or him. So many times people want to use an excuse not to deal with their actions, no matter how they may be received by soceity. I want you to be a proud mother and stop thinking about things you have no control over, who is to say soceity is right and besides an abortion is not a great choice either. i know right now you dont have an emotional attachment, but when the baby is born you will.
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i think you should keep the baby hun. the first abortion was tough for you and who knows if this way may be worse. just think of it as a beautiful caring baby with emotions and giggles. this is a living human being inside of you with your blood running through it's vains. will it have your eye color? your hair color? your nose? are you not a least bit curious? will it have his/her fathers nose? his/her fathers hair color? who knows and your family may not even notice since you and the baby daddy are related. i personally think you shouldn't say ever who the father is. whether the conceivement was a rape or by choice i still dont think you should ever reveal the father. come up with a story or something and please keep away from this man. try to atleast. this is a living human being inside of you whether the father was related to you or not. if you feel like you can't get help there are always programs out there and government help llike medical and food stamps and help with daycare or adoption but like your mother said, it all changes once you are holding the baby in your arms. you may feel differently once you are further along your pregnancy and you can feel the baby moving and sometimes responding to your voice or a certain song by movement and seeing the baby in an ultrasound is an amazing experience as well. the father should and always will be your dirty little secret but just be positive and think of this as a beautiful blessing.
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I'm wondering, after a year from your post, how are you doing... did you go through with the 2nd abortion? Or did you choose to raise the child? And if you chose the later, how do you feel about it now? I'm asking because I am going through exactly the same thing... only, my choice of having an abortion is too late. Emotionally, I feel like I'm starting with the stages of depression. I have no one to talk to and my conscious is so deeply troubled.... I would be grateful if you contact me and give me some advice.....
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Dancin queen, I'm wross. I had a baby from that relationship and I love my child so much. I wish I never had an abortion. Now I see it does not matter what people think. The love you feel for your child and the love that child gives you is the greatest love of all. If you believe in God just trust him. Love yourself and love your child.
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Wross i realize how old your post is and i found it quite by accident. I have to admit something from ecperience. My sister was adopted out when i was 5 and like a bad soap opera i met her in high school and we started dating not knowing until my senior year.my mom put it together and told me. I talked with my sister and we continued the relationship. Since then we have had 2 beautiful healthy baby girls. We are married by a loophole caused by her having been adopted. And have been together almost 12 years. Should anyone else happen to read this incest children arent always geneticaly malformed. Go with your hearts. Sometimes there is a way for it to work with someone you love. And my oldest daughter is in the top of her schools testing so the fears propagated by ignorant judgemental people cant be true. Best wishes and hope you are well now
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