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Were you rejected even before birth? Did you grow up feeling unwanted, like you were a mistake? You CAN heal this!

One of our facilitators requested that I write an article about children who were rejected before they were born. She wanted to know the best way to address this deep hurt and rejection that happens even before birth.

Unfortunately, far too many children energetically receive the information that they are not wanted. Many of them conclude that they are a mistake - that God made a mistake in bringing them to the planet.

Even children who were not rejected before birth can still conclude that they are a mistake, because, even though their parents say they wanted them, they never experienced being important to their parents.

In my experience, the way to address this is exactly the same way we address all childhood experiences of being unloved and rejected:

  1. First, you need to acknowledge the deep heartbreak of this rejection. You could not fully feel this as a small child because you had no way of managing this huge pain, but now you need to fully feel and acknowledge, with deep compassion - with tenderness, gentleness, and kindness - the intense pain of being unwanted and unloved.
  2. You may need to go back into time and fully embrace with deep compassion - compassion that you invite in from Spirit - each memory you have of feeling unloved and rejected.
  3. Sometimes, you need to be held while you cry these feelings out and allow them to move through you. Finding a loving person to hold you - a person who is capable of bringing through unconditional love with no agenda other then to love - is not easy. We often do this at Intensives.
  4. Once you feel some relief of the heartbreak, then you need to do an Inner Bonding process to see how you are causing your own heartbreak with your self-abandonment. How are you treating yourself the way your parents or other caregivers treated you? Do you ignore your own feelings as you were ignored? Do you judge yourself as you were judged, or as your caregivers judged themselves? Do you turn to addictions, as your caregivers may have modeled? Do you make others responsible for your feelings as your caregivers may have done with you and others?
  5. Once you understand how you are perpetuating your own heartbreak, you need to begin to treat yourself the way you wish your parents had treated you. No matter how deep your childhood heartbreak, you can heal your heart through learning to be consistently loving to yourself.

It is very important to accept that you are not a mistake. Whether or not your parents wanted you does not need to define your journey on the planet. You as a soul came here to learn, grow, evolve in love, fully manifest your gifts, and experience joy. You get to do all of this whether or not your parents wanted you.

Souls whose parents didn't want them have chosen this scenario to challenge themselves in learning how to love themselves and share their love with others. In my experience, these people are often fairly advanced souls who wanted a big challenge on this planet. They wanted to see if they could keep their hearts open and learn to be loving to themselves and others in the face of very difficult circumstances. I encourage all who had very difficult childhoods to accept this soul's challenge.

Whether you were wanted or not, deep healing occurs when you want yourself - your beautiful, incredible, magnificent soul within you that is your true self - the spark of the Divine within you.