hey, i am 15 years old, about a month ago i smoked a lot out of a beer can. it was the first time i had smoked in a couple months and i got really high. i had about 3 beers that night also. the next morning i felt ok but at around 5 that night i started feeling really high out of nowhere and it had been about 15 hours before i had last smoked. i just tried to go to sleep and i slept for a couple of hours, and when i woke up i started feeling the same dp effects as most of you have explained. i was very paraniod, anxious, and i a lot of minor panic attacks every day, i would start getting very paranoid every time i left home, or if i was alone. it has been about a month since i smoked and my "dp" is still there. it has gotten a lot better since then and some days i will feel fine, but on the other hand, other days i will feel very weird. i just want to feel normal again...
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I've been smoking since I was almost sixteen until now (21).. However, I took a year off of it when I was 18. I stopped for a month about two weeks ago.. In the last two weeks i've smoked on three different occasions. Each time I was high for 4 hours and went into my own sort of world. I was with a bunch of friends who were talking about things that did not interest me. I pretty much did not comment the entire time because their conversation was insulting, not to me personally, but because it was immature and offensive. They just need to grow the hell up.
Anyway, my smoking has been heavy for the last three years and im finally ready to say IM DONE. I drank as long as I've been smoking and I can say I am an alcoholic also. The alcohol is harder to quit than the weed. Anyway two and a half years ago I tripped an 8th of weed with some alcohol and later smoked some weed.. Anyway I was trippin... not seeing things but was in my own world (I saw reno 911 on the tv and thought it was some corrupt cops arresting innocent people). It freaked me out. I've also overdosed on Ambien on purpose three times a year and a half ago.. after I did all these things I didnt feel any less sane. However, i've pondered if when you do drugs like this if damage is done rather quickly or sets in a year later.
Anyhow, my vocabulary has declined. I have some memory loss. I feel very very sane, as in no insane thoughts. I do however have a very strong emotional detachment. It is a long story but I used to lie a lot and have a massive ego.. It all fell apart and I think the emotional wall I set up is to protect me while I try to redefine myself. I'm still doing this and I've come quite a ways but it wont be over until I'm sober and getting the good grades. (two years ago I was getting an F's with mostly C's and an occasional D. Now im getting A's, B's, and a C. I know I'm smart.. but I'm scared. The spacey feeling did not go away after a month of not smoking. Memory loss went away to an extent but I still had some. It wasnt like in highschool where I could quit smoking for five days and it all returned. im just wondering if im screwed or this will ease up after two, three, or four months. Either way I'm smart but when I smoke even one hit im out for like 4 hours. What it comes down too is I know I'm all there but the people i'm surrounded by drive me a little crazy. I need to get sober and hang out with sober people.
And yes I will start going to church again.
Anyway, my smoking has been heavy for the last three years and im finally ready to say IM DONE. I drank as long as I've been smoking and I can say I am an alcoholic also. The alcohol is harder to quit than the weed. Anyway two and a half years ago I tripped an 8th of weed with some alcohol and later smoked some weed.. Anyway I was trippin... not seeing things but was in my own world (I saw reno 911 on the tv and thought it was some corrupt cops arresting innocent people). It freaked me out. I've also overdosed on Ambien on purpose three times a year and a half ago.. after I did all these things I didnt feel any less sane. However, i've pondered if when you do drugs like this if damage is done rather quickly or sets in a year later.
Anyhow, my vocabulary has declined. I have some memory loss. I feel very very sane, as in no insane thoughts. I do however have a very strong emotional detachment. It is a long story but I used to lie a lot and have a massive ego.. It all fell apart and I think the emotional wall I set up is to protect me while I try to redefine myself. I'm still doing this and I've come quite a ways but it wont be over until I'm sober and getting the good grades. (two years ago I was getting an F's with mostly C's and an occasional D. Now im getting A's, B's, and a C. I know I'm smart.. but I'm scared. The spacey feeling did not go away after a month of not smoking. Memory loss went away to an extent but I still had some. It wasnt like in highschool where I could quit smoking for five days and it all returned. im just wondering if im screwed or this will ease up after two, three, or four months. Either way I'm smart but when I smoke even one hit im out for like 4 hours. What it comes down too is I know I'm all there but the people i'm surrounded by drive me a little crazy. I need to get sober and hang out with sober people.
And yes I will start going to church again.
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exercise. increased blood flow to the brain, releases endorphins, improves memory and coordination, increases motivation. Believe me, i know. I have smoked many times and its the only way to get back to what you were before, happy and in touch with reality.
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I've been smoking weed for about three years. I've smoked every day for the last year, and I have never had a problem with anything.
I'm a manic depressive, and I can honestly say that it helps a hell of a lot more than anti-depressants.
I've always had really bad anxiety, and when I smoke, it goes away along with the depression.
Unfortunately, I've been put in a position where I can't smoke weed for a while, and now, I'm back to the way I used to be.
Hopefully I can start soon. I'm already getting sick of feeling like this.
I'm a manic depressive, and I can honestly say that it helps a hell of a lot more than anti-depressants.
I've always had really bad anxiety, and when I smoke, it goes away along with the depression.
Unfortunately, I've been put in a position where I can't smoke weed for a while, and now, I'm back to the way I used to be.
Hopefully I can start soon. I'm already getting sick of feeling like this.
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dont worry mate, its because you still have THC in your blood, whenever you feel weird just take your mind off it because thinking about it too much will panic you then you will have the worst experience of your life (panic attack.) it happened to me after smoking it for 2 years my heart started racing so i panicked .now i feel anxious alot of the time and have the symptoms too.its starting to clear up tho after 3 weeks.
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I too have had episodes of anxiety, panic, deja vu and derealization/depersonalization that started abruptly last January. The first couple of "attacks" happened while sitting in front of the computer, and then they started happening at work. Yesterday I had a "deja vu" episode followed by intense anxiety/panic symptoms (e.g. racing heart, labored breathing). It lasted somewhere between 30-60 seconds. I was at the computer and it came on suddenly without warning, just like the first one.
I've had plenty of panic attacks before, but it was only after I got into moderate to heavy pot (combined with alcohol) use and then tapered off the stuff that I got these brief, intense and unexpected episodes of deja vu and depersonalization. They were diagnosed as panic attacks, although some other threads on this board suggest they may be some type of temporal lobe or partial seizure (I do have temporal lobe ADD). Anyway, since January my anxiety has shot up drastically and now I'm on 3 mg's of Klonopin (up from 0.5 mg prior to January) and a beta blocker to help with the anxiety and panic attacks. But I wonder if the frequent use of pot (which began last September and continued just past New Years) is what brought on these scary episodes and if so, do they eventually go away? I've only smoked weed a couple times in the past month and the last time was 2 weeks ago (I don't plan on smoking anymore for awhile either since I'm currently looking for a job).
I've had plenty of panic attacks before, but it was only after I got into moderate to heavy pot (combined with alcohol) use and then tapered off the stuff that I got these brief, intense and unexpected episodes of deja vu and depersonalization. They were diagnosed as panic attacks, although some other threads on this board suggest they may be some type of temporal lobe or partial seizure (I do have temporal lobe ADD). Anyway, since January my anxiety has shot up drastically and now I'm on 3 mg's of Klonopin (up from 0.5 mg prior to January) and a beta blocker to help with the anxiety and panic attacks. But I wonder if the frequent use of pot (which began last September and continued just past New Years) is what brought on these scary episodes and if so, do they eventually go away? I've only smoked weed a couple times in the past month and the last time was 2 weeks ago (I don't plan on smoking anymore for awhile either since I'm currently looking for a job).
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Everyone reacts differently to mind altering drugs like marijuana. I believe that everyone is born with a certain degree of mental control, and some people live their lives not even considering researching or improving this ability to control your own mind. I believe that people who have a very high ability of controlling their mind should only be allowed to experiment with mind altering drugs.
Due to the fact that mind altering drugs not only try to take over ur mind while ur smoking, but even days, weeks, or months after the use of mary jane ur mind can still be affected. How? Well, as many people have described before this post, many things like increased boredom, lack of motivation, and even anxiety can be present in your life (sometimes it even takes another human to tell you that you havent been as motivated as you used to). All of these things are possible 'after effects' according to your own individual mind. If your mind is weak against defending harsh effects of mind altering drugs, then you will end up with more serious life changing effects like anxiety.
All in all, my point is, you need to be educated about what to expect afterwards especially if your a first timer. You need to understand that your mind might not be strong enough to control itself.
Here's my story - The past summer I've been smoking quite a bit of weed. As the summer went on, my appreciation of it, and my interest in it grew. About half way through the summer, I went through a period of time where I was smoking everyday for aproximatly 9 days. Towards the end of that splurge, it started to occur to me that I was breaking my original pledge when I first started smoking at the beginning of Junior year - "To Not Smoke Everyday"! A while after that splurge, my girlfriend told me that she learned that weed suposivly decreases motivation. My response was disinint, and rather like - "Ummm... really, is that soo...." or sumthin like that, anyways, I basically didn't want to believe her, but I soon started to realize that throughout the past summer, I havent touched my summer reading books, havent made many musical recordings which "I LOVE TO DO", and I havent been doing... to put in more self-explainable words - ENJOYABLE CHALLENGES. I was simply just magnitised towards the "ENJOYABLE". Sure I played guitar still, but I dont think I have learned many new things on it, and I havent written many songs/ recorded any at all, and I havent really memorized anything on the guitar as well. This is funny because those very things are the things that I may want to make a living out of.
All I did the past summer was simply want to have blatent, and easy attained "fun". There are 2 types of "fun" in my opinion. The kind that is like going on a rollercoaster or whatching a movie, and the kind that is like being proud of your hard work, and patting yourself on your back for a job well done.
Anyways, lesson learned for me, I will never smoke as much weed as I did this past summer. However, I will still smoke an ocasional weed, and I will tell you why.
I have always believed in reaching an ultimate enlightenment by practicing balance within your everyday life. However, in order to achieve this balance and moderation, you must have the certain mental capabilities. Many people are not born with this mental capability, such as the people who react extremely negatively(anxiety) to pot after they smoke it. People are different, because at birth you are mentally and physically different in different aspects from other people. Some people like myself have a very easy time following The Divine Flow. The mental capability of controlling your life and pushing your mind, body and spirit into wanted areas without coming up with a reason to do so. It's that ultimate sense of "anything's possible as long as you put your mind to it". Well, some people like myself, can put our minds to something stonger than other people. I can control addiction now that I have this ultimate realization. After reading what everyone else has written, I can now be who I want to be. I can do what I want to do. And I will always like what I do, and do what I like.
Now your probably thinking that I'm just setting myself up for even more mistakes, and paths that I don't want to go down. Well, to me, I look at it as experience, and I will not stop lurking down paths unknown until I learn that my mind, and life can not walk it. I do this because I know that everyone is different, some people may not be able to walk down the paths that I can run on, yet on the other side of the spectrum, I may break a leg on a path that many people can race upon.
Having my mental ability is hard to attain for anyone. You have to stop second guessing yourself and just "shoot for the stars". You have to be extremely positive, and have a great motivation towards your goals in life. You have to actually want to constantly challenge yourself. Challenging yourself is hard, but you have to seriously make an opponent within yourself. You have to physically have two sides of yourself - one that will laugh at you for non achievement, and one that will shake your hand. You have to say OUTLOUD - I BET YOU CAN'T DO THIS 'insert your name here'!!! You Need To Be Your Own Worst Enemy! You need to create the person who has never had faith in you to be or do anything. Then, when you achieve, you can laugh at them, and say, "Told you so" instead of them saying the same thing to your dissapointed face. Why do we need to pessimistic, and optimistic at the same time, because I believe that it is the only way to achieve balance. Be optimistic towards achieving your goals, yet at the same time create someone inside of you screaming that you are worthless and can't do anything. Would this really work, would it make people more motivated..... of coarse.... the way goals are achieved easily is through proving to someone or something that you could actually do it. Pride is the ultimate sign of success. When you are proud of what you did, and you can rub it into the face of someone who didn't support you the whole time, then you get a REALLY REALLY GOOD FEELING. Enjoyable and rewarding challenges. It's hard for anyone to complete a challenge or goal without a reward in the end. If it doesn't have a reward, then make one - your own non-believer within you.
Due to the fact that mind altering drugs not only try to take over ur mind while ur smoking, but even days, weeks, or months after the use of mary jane ur mind can still be affected. How? Well, as many people have described before this post, many things like increased boredom, lack of motivation, and even anxiety can be present in your life (sometimes it even takes another human to tell you that you havent been as motivated as you used to). All of these things are possible 'after effects' according to your own individual mind. If your mind is weak against defending harsh effects of mind altering drugs, then you will end up with more serious life changing effects like anxiety.
All in all, my point is, you need to be educated about what to expect afterwards especially if your a first timer. You need to understand that your mind might not be strong enough to control itself.
Here's my story - The past summer I've been smoking quite a bit of weed. As the summer went on, my appreciation of it, and my interest in it grew. About half way through the summer, I went through a period of time where I was smoking everyday for aproximatly 9 days. Towards the end of that splurge, it started to occur to me that I was breaking my original pledge when I first started smoking at the beginning of Junior year - "To Not Smoke Everyday"! A while after that splurge, my girlfriend told me that she learned that weed suposivly decreases motivation. My response was disinint, and rather like - "Ummm... really, is that soo...." or sumthin like that, anyways, I basically didn't want to believe her, but I soon started to realize that throughout the past summer, I havent touched my summer reading books, havent made many musical recordings which "I LOVE TO DO", and I havent been doing... to put in more self-explainable words - ENJOYABLE CHALLENGES. I was simply just magnitised towards the "ENJOYABLE". Sure I played guitar still, but I dont think I have learned many new things on it, and I havent written many songs/ recorded any at all, and I havent really memorized anything on the guitar as well. This is funny because those very things are the things that I may want to make a living out of.
All I did the past summer was simply want to have blatent, and easy attained "fun". There are 2 types of "fun" in my opinion. The kind that is like going on a rollercoaster or whatching a movie, and the kind that is like being proud of your hard work, and patting yourself on your back for a job well done.
Anyways, lesson learned for me, I will never smoke as much weed as I did this past summer. However, I will still smoke an ocasional weed, and I will tell you why.
I have always believed in reaching an ultimate enlightenment by practicing balance within your everyday life. However, in order to achieve this balance and moderation, you must have the certain mental capabilities. Many people are not born with this mental capability, such as the people who react extremely negatively(anxiety) to pot after they smoke it. People are different, because at birth you are mentally and physically different in different aspects from other people. Some people like myself have a very easy time following The Divine Flow. The mental capability of controlling your life and pushing your mind, body and spirit into wanted areas without coming up with a reason to do so. It's that ultimate sense of "anything's possible as long as you put your mind to it". Well, some people like myself, can put our minds to something stonger than other people. I can control addiction now that I have this ultimate realization. After reading what everyone else has written, I can now be who I want to be. I can do what I want to do. And I will always like what I do, and do what I like.
Now your probably thinking that I'm just setting myself up for even more mistakes, and paths that I don't want to go down. Well, to me, I look at it as experience, and I will not stop lurking down paths unknown until I learn that my mind, and life can not walk it. I do this because I know that everyone is different, some people may not be able to walk down the paths that I can run on, yet on the other side of the spectrum, I may break a leg on a path that many people can race upon.
Having my mental ability is hard to attain for anyone. You have to stop second guessing yourself and just "shoot for the stars". You have to be extremely positive, and have a great motivation towards your goals in life. You have to actually want to constantly challenge yourself. Challenging yourself is hard, but you have to seriously make an opponent within yourself. You have to physically have two sides of yourself - one that will laugh at you for non achievement, and one that will shake your hand. You have to say OUTLOUD - I BET YOU CAN'T DO THIS 'insert your name here'!!! You Need To Be Your Own Worst Enemy! You need to create the person who has never had faith in you to be or do anything. Then, when you achieve, you can laugh at them, and say, "Told you so" instead of them saying the same thing to your dissapointed face. Why do we need to pessimistic, and optimistic at the same time, because I believe that it is the only way to achieve balance. Be optimistic towards achieving your goals, yet at the same time create someone inside of you screaming that you are worthless and can't do anything. Would this really work, would it make people more motivated..... of coarse.... the way goals are achieved easily is through proving to someone or something that you could actually do it. Pride is the ultimate sign of success. When you are proud of what you did, and you can rub it into the face of someone who didn't support you the whole time, then you get a REALLY REALLY GOOD FEELING. Enjoyable and rewarding challenges. It's hard for anyone to complete a challenge or goal without a reward in the end. If it doesn't have a reward, then make one - your own non-believer within you.
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I used to smoke all day every day.
I had a realllly bad shroom trip (my first trip ever), and I freaked out. I felt like everyone wanted me to leave, that no one liked me, that they were all talking about me, laughing at me. It was horrible.
Since that day, I get those same feelings every time I smoke pot. I've tried laying off of it for a year, and then smoking again, I've tried smoking by myself, or just around people I really trusted.
Nothing works. It eventually got to the point where I just didn't care about weed anymore... But I do miss the feeling of being "high"... I just don't care for all the anxious, paranoid bs.
I had a realllly bad shroom trip (my first trip ever), and I freaked out. I felt like everyone wanted me to leave, that no one liked me, that they were all talking about me, laughing at me. It was horrible.
Since that day, I get those same feelings every time I smoke pot. I've tried laying off of it for a year, and then smoking again, I've tried smoking by myself, or just around people I really trusted.
Nothing works. It eventually got to the point where I just didn't care about weed anymore... But I do miss the feeling of being "high"... I just don't care for all the anxious, paranoid bs.
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It's funny, the things you learn, the lessons you have to get beaten into your head to finally surface you to the person you should be. For me I was straight edge up until 18. That's right not a sip of alcohol, not a dash of pot, and not a puff of tobacco. Soon as I turned 18 my curiosity had nearly bent me backwards(not helping my friends would nt stop haggling me to smoke, wondering just how funny I could be high). Well guess what, I was hilarious, so funny in fact It made me start acting funny...I started doing all the things I never in a million years dreamed of doing. I began drinking, smoking pot regularly, and down the road even picked up smoking small cigars and eating pills on occasion. Lovely right? Not so, unfortunately. I'm now two years from that time in where I have given up that regular heavy use of pot and the cigars for about 3 months now. Quite honestly, I have no idea who the f**k I am. I forget what made me funny. I forget how to laugh, when to laugh, what to look for to laugh. I forgot how to be a f*****g human being. The people out there that are more inpenetrable to pots highly induced long term side effect, two words, you're blessed. I on the other hand didn't get so lucky, and now I have to worry about whether or not I'll ever be that comedian I was once sought out by many to be. Scary feeling, but we've all got our fears I guess. At least you can still act accordingly between them. I, because of pot, don't know if I'll ever be the same. I just hope that some person feeling the affects of slight depersonalization reading this drops the GARBAGE, yeah that's right GARBAGE life ruining disease/drug marijuana before it infects you and the people around you. I still to this day don't know whether I'm more pissed that I can't be myself, or rather that I can't use myself to inspire others like I did in the past not long ago. Believe me that my problem is far more vast than any other on this page, and yes I compare quite precisely with the boyfriend described in the main blog post. By the way, to the girl who posted it's of the utmost importance that if you have any update as to how he recovered or even if he recovered in any way at all your knowledge is needed here.
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I've been feeling much the same about my pot usage as the poster above me. I'm not the person I was anymore, at all. Strong, driven, HAPPY. But I think I can get it back, I just have to stop and disassociate myself with all of this.
:-(
:-(
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I'm glad I found this page. I don't smoke much, nor have I ever smoked much, but I recently am feeling symptoms of depersonalization due to smoking just a couple times in the past week. I just don't feel right, but I'm just trying to realize that everything is still the same, but my perspective has just changed. I'm still the same person, and though I thought weed led me to opportunities socially and thought it couldn't do any wrong, I realize that mistake. I am never going to smoke weed again EVER in my life. I can't stand feeling this way, but I'm staying positive and hoping this feeling subsides... Thanks for the support guys. :-D
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Okay excuse the slight essay ... id just like to put my experience into words. as ive never done so in detail any feedback would be greatly appreciated!
I never write on forums or anything.. but this thread i have to..
ive been smoking weed since i was about 14, not a week or two without it till about a year ago before my 18th birthday... i went with a friend from university to go see his friends who were all blokes aged 22 - 23. even though i was younger i knew i could handly myself in the situation as i was a confident funny guy (which i still am to some degree ...)
we were smoking everyday spliffs .. just a regular joint playing pro evo while im in a room with like 7 men and my friend. Then suddenly just after a normal toke when i wasnt even that high .. i have the most insane mind bending, terrifying anxiety attack. i thought everyone in the room wanted to steal my weed .. they wanted to beat me up .. i was being filmed for a joke that was gonna get uploaded on the internet after they stole my weed.. CRAZY sh*t id never had before .. you know when you smoke and you get a little bit paranoid if you smoke too much .. well times that by 100. i quickly left to get a train home (thinking my friend was in on it too) the train home was the worst experience of my life, totally detached from reality .. hearing voices .. thinking the police were after me. it was SO severe i firted with the idea of jumping in front of a train to stop me going to prison...
Eventually i got back into my room .. and realised how screwed up what id just experienced really was. It was the scariest experience of my entire 18 years of being alive. Needless to say i stopped smoking weed straight away .. as hard as it was, i saw it as a sign not to f**k with mary jane anymore as she had taught me a valuable lesson i was not going to ignore. I kinda stopped hanging round with my old group of cool friends due to the fact i dont even really like being around people smoking weed anymore .. i see it as when people smoke weed in a group, they have a shared conscience and are on a level thats different to you if your not high. id still go out clubbing with them a few times a week and theyd always wish i could go back to how i was .. laid back about sh*t.
i had a few panic attacks in the coming month after quitting .. once in a lecture and once on a train .. it seems my anxiety now is in enclosed social places .. as i had a panic attack in one of those places before .. if i walk around outside with friends i feel totally myself and am fine with the world... but on a train with someone opposite me .. or in a lecture sitting at the front with 100 people behind me i really get anxious that everyones staring at me and i think how my face looks and try as hard as i can to make it look normal (sounds weird ... i know, reading it back to me just now has kinda actually made it seem f*****g stupid ..) i get even more anxious around people i think might be looking out for it .. like my dad knew about my experience and now i think hes always thinking about whether i seem normal or not. i feel like my personalitys definitely not as laid back as it was .. but i still feel like me deep down, and i feel like 100% percent my old self when i go out drinking with my friends.
Does anyone think i have anxiety disorder ... or do you think its kinda mild anxiety ? should i see a doctor ? i dont think its ever warranted being bad enough to see a doctor but i do feel i could enjoy enclosed social situations that little bit better with some kind of anxiety reducer ..
sorry for the essay, it actually feels really good to write all this out .. havnt opened up about any of this sh*t to a single human soul. and yet im writing it on the internet to many.
for those others who have been through this sh*t, dont you just WISH you'd done it in moderation ? i know i do .. i feel like ive lost a part of me not being able to smoke weed and think in that mindset.
thanks
Sam
I never write on forums or anything.. but this thread i have to..
ive been smoking weed since i was about 14, not a week or two without it till about a year ago before my 18th birthday... i went with a friend from university to go see his friends who were all blokes aged 22 - 23. even though i was younger i knew i could handly myself in the situation as i was a confident funny guy (which i still am to some degree ...)
we were smoking everyday spliffs .. just a regular joint playing pro evo while im in a room with like 7 men and my friend. Then suddenly just after a normal toke when i wasnt even that high .. i have the most insane mind bending, terrifying anxiety attack. i thought everyone in the room wanted to steal my weed .. they wanted to beat me up .. i was being filmed for a joke that was gonna get uploaded on the internet after they stole my weed.. CRAZY sh*t id never had before .. you know when you smoke and you get a little bit paranoid if you smoke too much .. well times that by 100. i quickly left to get a train home (thinking my friend was in on it too) the train home was the worst experience of my life, totally detached from reality .. hearing voices .. thinking the police were after me. it was SO severe i firted with the idea of jumping in front of a train to stop me going to prison...
Eventually i got back into my room .. and realised how screwed up what id just experienced really was. It was the scariest experience of my entire 18 years of being alive. Needless to say i stopped smoking weed straight away .. as hard as it was, i saw it as a sign not to f**k with mary jane anymore as she had taught me a valuable lesson i was not going to ignore. I kinda stopped hanging round with my old group of cool friends due to the fact i dont even really like being around people smoking weed anymore .. i see it as when people smoke weed in a group, they have a shared conscience and are on a level thats different to you if your not high. id still go out clubbing with them a few times a week and theyd always wish i could go back to how i was .. laid back about sh*t.
i had a few panic attacks in the coming month after quitting .. once in a lecture and once on a train .. it seems my anxiety now is in enclosed social places .. as i had a panic attack in one of those places before .. if i walk around outside with friends i feel totally myself and am fine with the world... but on a train with someone opposite me .. or in a lecture sitting at the front with 100 people behind me i really get anxious that everyones staring at me and i think how my face looks and try as hard as i can to make it look normal (sounds weird ... i know, reading it back to me just now has kinda actually made it seem f*****g stupid ..) i get even more anxious around people i think might be looking out for it .. like my dad knew about my experience and now i think hes always thinking about whether i seem normal or not. i feel like my personalitys definitely not as laid back as it was .. but i still feel like me deep down, and i feel like 100% percent my old self when i go out drinking with my friends.
Does anyone think i have anxiety disorder ... or do you think its kinda mild anxiety ? should i see a doctor ? i dont think its ever warranted being bad enough to see a doctor but i do feel i could enjoy enclosed social situations that little bit better with some kind of anxiety reducer ..
sorry for the essay, it actually feels really good to write all this out .. havnt opened up about any of this sh*t to a single human soul. and yet im writing it on the internet to many.
for those others who have been through this sh*t, dont you just WISH you'd done it in moderation ? i know i do .. i feel like ive lost a part of me not being able to smoke weed and think in that mindset.
thanks
Sam
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if you or someone you know has experienced ANY of these negative symptoms while smoking marijuana, stop immediately. IT IS NOT WORTH IT!
if you don't believe me read my story below....
if only person reads this it will be worth it. I smoked weed from about the time i was a junior in highschool to the end of my first year of college.
It started as just panic attacks, but turned into deep depression, extreme anxiety, and complete inability to relate with any of my friends. Unfortunately, weed was the answer to all my problems including this one. I got to the point that i was HIGHLY PSYCHOTIC, and could barely leave my dorm room from anxiety. I dropped out, continued to smoke and ended up with a PSYCHOTIC BREAK(look it up) that put me in the psych ward of the UofM Hospital for about 3 weeks.
After about 3 years of antipsychotics, antianxiety/depression meds and being diagnosed first with SCHIZOPHRENIA, but then later change to just BIPOPLAR, but i am just now feeling normal, working a job, and going back to school.
most people can handle weed without to many negative affects, but some people are just not chemically designed to mess with it.
Personally, I feel 10 times better sober than i ever did smoking weed
IF IT SEEMS LIKE THERE IS NO RELIEF FROM ANXIETY/DEPRESSION/DEPERSONALIZATION DO NOT BE AFRAID TO GO TO A PSYCHIATRIST AND POSSIBLY PUT ON MEDS TEMPORARILY OR LONGER.
IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE WEAK TO SEEK HELP.
if you don't believe me read my story below....
if only person reads this it will be worth it. I smoked weed from about the time i was a junior in highschool to the end of my first year of college.
It started as just panic attacks, but turned into deep depression, extreme anxiety, and complete inability to relate with any of my friends. Unfortunately, weed was the answer to all my problems including this one. I got to the point that i was HIGHLY PSYCHOTIC, and could barely leave my dorm room from anxiety. I dropped out, continued to smoke and ended up with a PSYCHOTIC BREAK(look it up) that put me in the psych ward of the UofM Hospital for about 3 weeks.
After about 3 years of antipsychotics, antianxiety/depression meds and being diagnosed first with SCHIZOPHRENIA, but then later change to just BIPOPLAR, but i am just now feeling normal, working a job, and going back to school.
most people can handle weed without to many negative affects, but some people are just not chemically designed to mess with it.
Personally, I feel 10 times better sober than i ever did smoking weed
IF IT SEEMS LIKE THERE IS NO RELIEF FROM ANXIETY/DEPRESSION/DEPERSONALIZATION DO NOT BE AFRAID TO GO TO A PSYCHIATRIST AND POSSIBLY PUT ON MEDS TEMPORARILY OR LONGER.
IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE WEAK TO SEEK HELP.
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Like alot of other posters before me, the same thing happened to me after smoking weed for about 6 months.
One night I had a bad "trip" where I was stuck in this 'out of sync with time' feeling, for about 3 days. A few days after I had a massive panic attack that put me in the E.R., before this I've never experienced a panic attack in my life, ever. So I thought something was wrong, brain tumor or heart attack or something.
The moment I had that panic attack I was put into the "dream" state that someone mentioned, everything seemed floaty, and not real. The Dr.s put me on Valum, that made it worse, all I did was sleep, they then put me on prozac, which actually made me more depressed, I swear I heard voices. So I took myself off of the prozac and told myself if my mind can do this to me, my mind can get me out of it.
I went to a nutritionist, she said to take omega 3, and magnesium glycinate, vitmain B. Other than that I joined yoga which I do 2 to 3 times a week, it helps me so SO much, it reconnects your body with your mind, and I've also been running 2 miles on the days I don't do yoga, fresh air and some sunlight does wonders for you. I heard sunlight helps produce seratonin (spelling) which helps with mood.
I experienced the panic attack 2 years ago and I still feel that distant feeling deep down most of the time, and I do have some really bad days..BUT I promise you that it DOES get better, you just have to pull yourself out of the pit your in, it can be scary at first I know because everything seems so weird, but just dive into it, and the panic will become tolerable a little more each time.
Life is not a dream, you are real and you will be ok.
One night I had a bad "trip" where I was stuck in this 'out of sync with time' feeling, for about 3 days. A few days after I had a massive panic attack that put me in the E.R., before this I've never experienced a panic attack in my life, ever. So I thought something was wrong, brain tumor or heart attack or something.
The moment I had that panic attack I was put into the "dream" state that someone mentioned, everything seemed floaty, and not real. The Dr.s put me on Valum, that made it worse, all I did was sleep, they then put me on prozac, which actually made me more depressed, I swear I heard voices. So I took myself off of the prozac and told myself if my mind can do this to me, my mind can get me out of it.
I went to a nutritionist, she said to take omega 3, and magnesium glycinate, vitmain B. Other than that I joined yoga which I do 2 to 3 times a week, it helps me so SO much, it reconnects your body with your mind, and I've also been running 2 miles on the days I don't do yoga, fresh air and some sunlight does wonders for you. I heard sunlight helps produce seratonin (spelling) which helps with mood.
I experienced the panic attack 2 years ago and I still feel that distant feeling deep down most of the time, and I do have some really bad days..BUT I promise you that it DOES get better, you just have to pull yourself out of the pit your in, it can be scary at first I know because everything seems so weird, but just dive into it, and the panic will become tolerable a little more each time.
Life is not a dream, you are real and you will be ok.
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I always smoked casually for more than 10 years, and every time i felt depressed i use to stop.A few weeks ago i started smoking again, and i felt fine, but then 2 days ago i was sitting with my girlfriend watching a movie, and i decided to smoke, a few moments later i started feeling dizzy in a very bad way, i went to the bathroom to wash my face, but the feeling was getting worse, i started thinking i was poisoned or that i was going to have a heart attack, or a stroke.I told my girlfriend i was having a heart attack, i kept walking from one side of the room to another with my partner holding my hand, i felt if i fainted or let go i would go crazy, or have a brain damage, my legs and arms were shaking, i didn't wanted to faint so i kept on walking for one hour, then i went to sleep.It was the most horrible feeling ever i felt i was going to die that my existence was going to fade.The next day i felt very weird, when i spoke is like i wasn't really there, i felt disconnected with myself, i still feel a bit anxious and depressive, but slowly i think i am getting better.I never ever felt like this before, actually smoking was making me feel good and now i cant smoke it sucks.
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