Does my boyfriend have a paranoid personality?

omg ! all this sounds so true my man is the sameee way weve been together for about 7 months and in the begining it was great we hung out everyday and everything was just so perfect . then one day he needed to use my phone and seen a 12 min convo with the last guy before him i had been with well my phone was messed up like he knew, and he confronted me and threw my phone and hit me in the face with it he was so mad i tryed to explain but all he did was yell over me . i never even spoke with that boy at all . we are still together and unfortuantly that was just the very tippy top of the ice berg. he comes from a wealthy family also had went through horrific things as a child and teenager he lost his mother just at 16 , i love this boy so much but somthing has got to give. i cant live life everyday with him thnking that i have sex with my dad or uncle or my female friends its an insult to me when he says things like that it also embarrasses me that he thinks that about me period . one time i went to chill with one of my friends and then he picked me up after and smelled my hands and my lips and broke up with me because he said my hands and face smelt like vagina ! lmao wow . im almost possitive he has a disorder now.

omg ! all this sounds so true my man is the sameee way weve been together for about 7 months and in the begining it was great we hung out everyday and everything was just so perfect . then one day he needed to use my phone and seen a 12 min convo with the last guy before him i had been with well my phone was messed up like he knew, and he confronted me and threw my phone and hit me in the face with it he was so mad i tryed to explain but all he did was yell over me . i never even spoke with that boy at all . we are still together and unfortuantly that was just the very tippy top of the ice berg. he comes from a wealthy family also had went through horrific things as a child and teenager he lost his mother just at 16 , i love this boy so much but somthing has got to give. i cant live life everyday with him thnking that i have sex with my dad or uncle or my female friends its an insult to me when he says things like that it also embarrasses me that he thinks that about me period . one time i went to chill with one of my friends and then he picked me up after and smelled my hands and my lips and broke up with me because he said my hands and face smelt like vagina ! lmao wow . im almost possitive he has a disorder now.

i feel like im in a simular situation, i have been with my boyfriend for 8 years and have a 17 month baby with him, for the last 1-2 years he is constantly accusing me of lying about where i have been, what i have been doing etc, it just seems like question after question. Everything is negative with him and it really is getting me down and feel like im on edge all the time with him!! thing is we have a mortgage and im scared i will loose everything!!!!!! i always have to ask his permission if i can go out with the girls and the last time i have been out without him was say a year ago help what can i do, i do love him as he can be a really nice guy to get on with.

Yeah I can see where you are coming from! I have been dating this guy for 4 months now and when i say hi to a friend instead of coming to him first he says I ignore him and he thinks that I'm going to cheat on him because his girlfriend from over a year ago cheated on him! I've tried really har to convince him that I will never cheat on him but he is too insecure, and paranoid. What do i do to stop all this drama?

LEAVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
This is probably late, but u MUST LEAVE HIM> If he has hit u its already too late. OMG I AM SO SCARED FOR U! i knew u I would come pack u up and take u to live with me and away from him!!~

YOU MUST I REPEAT MUST FIND WORTH IN URSELF> I am certain you are a beautiful kind loving woman, as most women natrually are, especially those who put themselves in abusive situations. TRUST ME IT ONLY GET WORSE. If he doesnt trust himself enough to say he MIGHT Kill you THEN HE DOESNT VALUE YOU

Please, for me, your family,. and your old friends who loved u so much LEAVE him Find ur happiness Place, and Fill ur Life with people who treat u like the daughter of mother earth you are.

Bless u

so i was looking at this site. curious about what it was saying. my boyfriend went through my computer history and saw this. hes about to post a reply...good lord i'm sick of these rants. trust me it will be a rant. a little paranoid and hurt from the past.

i am a man with trust issues. im very hurt by what all of you women have said and i fear for the wellbeing of society. my ex-girlfriend slept with my dad and my older brother when i was younger and admitted it to me later and said it was my fault for not being manly enough and she said something to the effect of "whats the big deal? guys fantasize about Milfs.. your a guy get over it"... that effected me... it will always effect me. the lack of consideration that some (most in my life) people have for mens emotions is RIDICULOUS!! it took me 7 years to even admit to someone that it had happened... it made me search for love in the wrong places for a long time cause i was trying to mend a hole in my life that i dont think will actually ever heal.. ive tried talking it out with doctors and people but they dont really get how damaging things like this can be, and medication is not the right path.. (example: the previously mentioned guy that was fine until he missed one pill and went more nuts than before) 

just think about it ladies.. your man is obviously hurting, if he cant admit to you that he is then maybe get another man that can be honest, or you can wait it out and hope for the best...

what if the roles were reversed? would you want to be alone and in emotional agony with people looking, what feels to be down, at you saying "you're obviously unstable, its not safe for me here..."

and yes, below is my currant girlfriends post but i didn't go thru her computer history, she left the computer open to this page and here is another example of how you could be hurting your already hurt man:

"hahawaitformyboyfriendsreply on 4/15/12 6:29 PM

i am surprised by this response mostly because hes so calm but this is so because he read my post and had some forsight. anyways this is not the place for arguments, rather advice. no matter what you've been through doesn't justify treating people poorly and having such great mistrust. i've been by this mans side for 7 months now 24/7. never leave his side and i'm accused on the daily of sneaking out at night. anyways it just seems a little over possesive to me.

I have the same problem cant figure out what is the right thing to do, I have been with my boyfriend for 7 years now we have a 5 year old daughter together, when we first started going out he was such a sweetheart and funny guy but always put his friends first that changed then as time passed... I got pregnat and moved in with him little by little he began to be jelous he didnt want me hanging out with him when his friends were around hed say they would try to steal me from him as time passed he began saying I was flirting with them ( I would not ever do that, I love him and respect him) but he insisted so I stayed away from his friends completely! To avoid that unnessesary drama. Then it escalated by him accussing me of cheating on him at work (i was still pregnant while this was going on) .. As time passed I had our wonderful daughter and ofcourse would go over my parents house , he never wanted to be around my family and began accusing me of cheating when I would go over so I stopped going soo frequent, I hated this we ended up moving to arkansa for one year but I got very home sick while being soo far away so we came back to cali. He got an overnight job while I worked in the morning but things became very very strange he was accussing me of cheating every.day, began asking me for proof I was working by asking for pictures, he would also accuse me (still does) of checking every guy out when we'd go ANYWHERE even would throw fits of it while watching tv it was horrible, always trying to keep me away from my friends because he says they are whores and that they have tried sleeping with him, he would also break everything that was near him when he goy this upset, so after continuously getting accused of cheating I ended up cheating with an ex boyfriend I figured I was always getting accused anyway might as well do it, this guy treated me good was very sweet and understood me I finally felt appreciated and loved(i know that was the wrong thing to do but at the moment I just wanted a way out of my missery) and so this one day I had it due to us driving our daughter to school while he was going crazy screaming at me insisting I was cheating on him but I wasnt never had nor wanted to, and we got pulled over due to him speeding so that day I acted as if everything was fine and when he left to work I packed my bags and left with our daughter to my parents house I had warned him several times before but he never believed me and would reply "ha you would never be able to go through with dat " so I did. when he got out of work and noticed he went crazy looking for me, he ended up finding me and I told him why I left he got very fisical and ended up getting into a physical fight with my father. I confessed of cheating witch drove him more crazy worst thing I could have possibly done :( I had found some drugs at his house before I left(meth) so I got scared for my daughter I didnt want her around him because of that , so for the first two weeks I kept her away but I felt bad and she got to me because she missed him so I allowed him to see her but by that time he got even more insane calling my family and friends crying to them telling them I took her away and wouldnt let him see her (after telling him he could if he wanted to) he also began saying I was a prostitude saying I slept with all his friends dad stepdad my brother in laws even his brother in law! (This IS ABSOLUTELY NOT TRUE WHAT SO EVER!) He got soo lost in drugs lost ALOT OF WEIGHT LOST HIS JOB AND BLAMED IT ALL ON ME, I ended up filling a restraining order and when it was court day for him to get his visitations rights to see our daughter he didnt show , once he got his dad to call me while he was screaming at him in the backround accusing him of sleeping with him his own father! (Definetly NOT TRUE !) His sister told me he went nocking at every apartment of his building accusing every guy of sleeping with me and saying I was a prostitude! 4months passed and he calmed down so I decided to try to make things work for the sake of our daughter and I wanted my family together but he insists im a w**** and swears he seen me with different men and also says I would spy on him even that I got an apartment next to his building to torture him he even swears I had an adult page online! I keep trying to tell him he is completely wromg but he insists he is right (HE is NOT) my daughter got attached to him once again and above it all when he is with her hes a great father I love it! She loves him soo much and so do I but with me he could be a great boyfriend when no one is around but horrible when those nasty thoughts come into his head again, I know I should leave but I keep going back I need some advice I dont know how to handle this situation any more :(

Ladies.. I just have to say a few things...

Please, have more respect for yourselves!! Stand up for yourself because you DESERVE to be treated with respect! What you are all going through is not LOVE. It is ABUSE.! These types of relationships never get better, they only get worse.

Many of you stated that "he's the most amazing man ever when he's not exhibiting these behaviors!" and "I love him so much!".. but what you don't realize is that you do NOT love him. He is manipulating you! You love being in a relationship, feeling like someone wants you, feeling like you're worthy of being with him, like you have his "approval." Trust me. This is NOT what a relationship should be like.

These men are all insecure and they belittle you, seclude you from your friends and family, make you feel like you're not good enough, "break-up" with you, threaten you, call you names, make you feel inferior,all because they want to CONTROL you. They want to DEFINE you and make you think that you NEED them. If you are in a relationship with a man who makes you feel inferior, guilty, ashamed, trapped, scared, etc... you need to LEAVE. Don't think about anything else but your happiness, your safety, and your health.

Believe it or not, these types of negative, stressful relationships are actually bad for your health! You need to take a stand, pack up, and walk out the door. And when you do, don't look back, because there is a life full of happiness waiting for you. It is up to YOU to make the change.

If you let him treat you that way, he will. Best of luck to you all. Please don't underestimate yourself. Don't ever think that you're not strong enough. You are amazing and you have to love yourself and respect yourself before anyone else does.

If he doesn't respect you, he doesn't deserve you.

My advice is to move on before you get more attached. I have been in two of these relationships before and they don't get better with time. Your boyfriend has a mental health issue and he needs help dealing with his issues. I would move on, don't waste any more time. Paranoia can lead to aggression, especially if you are the source of his delusions.

I think this is more like the sign of an abusive relationship. Don't give him the excuse of paranoia

And here I was, thinking that all that breaking up/getting back together was a failure of my own specific relationship with me ex - never guessing how common it is... He's paranoid. Conspiracy theories - JFK, fake moon landing, you name it. Now I enjoy a good conspiracy theory. But he gets angry if anyone offers an alternative explanation. He told me I was "disrespecting his heritage" by saying I did not believe, having looked into it, that vapour trails are being used by the govt to genetically alter people and let the master race triumph. You can't convince him he's wrong - well, OK - but you cannot convince him you have any right to disagree.

And the hours I have spent saying, "Maybe when so-and-so said that, they were just having a bad day," after he's insisted some friend is against him (usually conspiring with the police/govt etc).

He would snap at me, hurt my feelings, call me "grumpy" for being hurt, walk out if I got upset. Before the break-up yesterday (which I am using all my strength to keep utterly final) we'd broken up two other times in the past 6 weeks. He took all his stuff without telling me, the first time. Second time, he said it was a couple of weeks apart, and then texted to tell me to keep the stuff he'd left. This time, he marched out after snapping at me all evening and finally getting up to go over some conspiracy clap-trap. Cos I got sick of saying, "Oh yes, dear, you've got a point - maybe the Illuminati do sacrifice children to the devil in order to rule the world! Now let's have a nice cup of tea." I just thought, Why should I put up with this? All I did was shake my head over it. That was enough. Cue the flounce-out.

Yes, and I'm a doormat, and I let him walk all over me, and I've been simpering and cringing and begging him to come back, time after time after time... Because this is love, isn't it.

Please God give me the strength to keep away this time. I do him no favours either, treating him like the Second Coming: no one learns from their mistakes if they never face the consequences of them. I need strength, I need courage, I need to be patient with myself. I need to just get through this. I will get through this

Of course I'm furious with him. Last night as he sneered at me for saying he was being cruel, I had the urge to throw things at him, (which of course I did not do) and swear at him (which would have been undignified, and I'm thankful I didn't). He is very ill, and he is getting sicker. I can see that he is in a terrible state, and it's a crime that there's no help in the UK for mentally ill people any more. But I have to stay away. Anyway he rejected me. So that's that.

It makes me very sad. I can't feel sad for him right now, because I can't afford to think of him warmly in case I fall back into the same error I've made 20 or 30 times already. But one day I will see he's helpless against his illness, especially as he has so little insight into it. Sad, sad, sad. All of it.

hi i need help too, i have a very paranoid bf he know he have OCD but wont get help he keep on saying that he will get better he can fight it he will help himself but everyday its becoming out of control he always checks up on me he always think im gonna do something to upset him or cheat on him and i never did, its getting way out of control even if im just at home he wod ask me every single detail what i did the whole day even getting up from bed he needs to know please help..

comin from a person with paniod personality disorder he definitly has ppd