Is my „straight friend“ gay?
I am gay. So on Thursday i was home, the heatwave was still ongoing and i was bored. My friend who is straight, married and has two kids, called me on my phone and was like „yo come over and let‘s go to ikea.“ so i went with him and his kids, bought something and went home. His wife was working. At the time a watersports match was ongoing and i was watching it with the kids. The straight guy called me to his bedroom which is just next door. He wanted me to Massage his lower back because he felt pain. He doesn’t really know my sexuality and i never explained it to him but i openly said stuff that should’ve hinted my sexuality. And btw i already massaged him a few times before too. Okay as i was massaging his lower back i was kinda hard. I wanted to see how low i could go so i started massaging his ass. He didn’t say anything about it. So i continued massaging his ass. Okay now if i were straight i would be like „woah boundaries. Stop it.“ but there was no sign of him being displeased. Okay i wanted to go further so i massaged his anus but nothing. When i said turn to the side so he did. But he didn’t wanted to show me his penis. Alright i was like turn around just s little more. I massaged his pelves. And he was hard. Either that or he just has a huge penis. I don’t know. I said to turn around completely and he did it. He laid on his back. i saw his penis fully erect. As i was about to go even further to like touch his penis his eldest child opened the door and so i quickly put a pillow on his penis. She gave him a phone he talked and i stopped massaging him. He got up and went to the living room. Leaving me there like nothing. I was confused because i didn’t know what that was. Anyway a bit later he sat next to me and i was being adventurous again. I lifted his shirt up a bit and his lower back was visible. He was talking on the phone again with his cousin. While talking and sitting i started massaging his lower back again. I slipped my hands inside his underwear massaging his ass. A bit later i grabbed his calves and went closer ro his penis. He had a bit of a stomach so he made my hand more accessible to his penis area by leaning back a bit. I think that’s how i felt it was like. Maybe he wanted it. I touched his penis with a finger and he was like. Wait my child is here. So i slipped my hands out of his pants and stopped. It was weird after that. I couldn’t sleep the night because i thought A) i touched a straight guy who has a family. B) is he possibly gay, bi, curious or just turned on because he has no sex with his wife? C) could there be something more to this guy? D) am i a home wrecker? E) Was it consensual? He didnt say no but also didn’t say yes either. Maybe it was the heat of the moment Idk. I felt so bad and still feel bad. The next day i was at his place again without him inviting me but because we are friends we do that all the time. He acted all weird towards me. Which is understandable. I couldn’t ask him about last night because his kids were there. So finally there was a window so i asked him what it was. He told me. It was weird to him. I overstepped the boundaries and i apologized for my behavior and i told him i wouldn’t do it again. He added like no worries we can still hang out normal. Its nothing blabla. I couldn’t look him in the eye. I was so embarrassed. The next day i asked him again why he got aroused and he told me there was some sort of adrenaline rush going on at the time and thats why he got hard. But is it really because of adrenaline or is he gay bi or whatever? I don’t want to cause him more confusion or something but I’m bothered about what if he is gay and still is with his wife? Is he gay bi or whatever? I’m still confused.
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