My husband is always angry

Danielle, has there been a discussion as to why he is angry? Does he or has he been diagnosed with an Authoritarian personality? My husband gets angry and has little patience. He had a very great job and was laid off with 2,000 other employees. Since, it has been very difficult financially. He has found small jobs only to be laid off again, the economy has hurt us tremendously. Aside from this, I am in school, I attend online classes for Psychology and I am also a Children's author. I am homeschooling one of our children and have my youngest at home with me all day. In August, we anticipate them going to Kindergarten and first grade. After that, I am doing what I need to do. Things haven't been working. Like you, you would think that some normalcy is what a husband would expect, but I feel that your husband is like mine, takes us for granted and cannot see anything past his own understanding or ideals. People will assume that wives nag, but in many instances, it is far from truth. I feel that you need to ask him one question... "Why aren't you happy?" Clearly, you have done everything possible to satisfy this part of your life, you take care of family, the home, and even go outside of the house to work. Props there, I've been put on a shelf since September of last year! Anyways, I feel that you have done what you can and I hope that should he reply that he is not happy see if there is a solution in order to change this, but you should not internalize his unhappiness like you have, it is up to him to find that or at least, find the reason why he is so unhappy and mean. There may be underlining reasons, but he owes it you as his wife, to confide in you, and share this with you.

ok ladies, silent warfare.  Pee on that punks toothbrush!  He'll never know and you cant argue about it.  

Please leave - this is what I want to say. But looking at your circumstances it is not that easy. Did you tell your parents what you are going through? If you did and they are still not supportive, then if I was you I would get me a good lawyer and file for divorce. Everytime he calls you names - call the cops. They will take him away for domestic battery, especially in front of your little daughter. He can easily go to jail for that, and while he's there you be strong and smart and file for divorce. You have all the rights to keep your child in a primary custody. If you dont have a degree, please do yourself a favor and start going to school. Women should never depend on a man financially. You deserve a better life. I went through all of this, and yes, the most painfull was when my ex called my daughter names. I din't put up with his c**p and always fought back. I had a job. I actually bought a house before the divorce, and got accepted to a good school after the divorce. Don't be afraid of life. As soon as you do steps that you was afraid to do - you will realize how easy it is. Meanwhile, I also suggest you to join a good church and go counceling. I am not from USA, but I made things happened in order to move from an abusive marriage. Feel free to contact me.

Jesus lady... He is abusing you! Get out immediately! I know what I'm talking about, I was in an abusive relationship and it will only get worse, he may even kill you.

When I tried to get out I was stalked at my home, my job and wherever I went. He punched me, choked me, tripped me in the sand on a beach, in the dark, kicked sand in my face, split my lip, multiple head traumas. He turned off the power in our home and stalked me room from room with a knife (just to scare me) He fractured my forearm, he even left me (with HIS family) 110 miles away from home, out of the Country. Your Husband has mental problems and you are the "beacon" of his anger.

Get a lawyer, get a restraining order and get out! Please I am begging you! There are SO MANY nice men out there, men that will treat you like GOLD and bring you sheer happiness. I know it's scary (thinking that you know nothing more than this man for sos many years) he probably has even made you feel like you can't do better than him? (am I right?) Or even worse that you are "lucky to even have him because he's better than you?" (am I right?) He has stripped your confidence to be strong, he has stripped your self esteem and brainwashed you into staying... GET OUT!

If you are afraid of not being able to support yourself without him (this is also a VERY common brain washing trick abusive people use to keep you around) then find a job, find a family member or friend that will take you in until you get on your feet. He has made you feel WORTHLESS and incompetent to take care yourself without him around... IT'S BS! YOU CAN!!! You deserve happiness and love and the freedom to be yourself.

NO ONE deserves abuse (physical, psychological or emotional) Get a lawyer, get a restraining order, get ALIMONY (if you are worried about money) but honestly this guy sounds like he would kill you before paying you alimony (this is the world we live in) GET OUT! He will kill you... I'm begging...

I think you guys should f**k more and make him happy because guys like turned on and sluttly girls. Just wake him up one morning and start doing your business. Good luck and you should probably go online and do some research before getting into action =) 

i feel the same every morning.. i find myself going through everything making sure there is nuthing there to piss him off because i cop it in the end... im flinching and scared every day :(

Please give me an update on your sitution. Are you and your wife still married. Did you seek medical attention?

i got the same issue i just don't know what to do :(

i am so tired.  i have been married for 3 year. my husband is never happy. he always screems at me. swears my life im a dog in front of my kids and just treats me like c**p. i cant move out, i have no where to go. i dont know what to do anymore. im just so tired.  does anyone have advise for me please.

Hey .. just wondering how you are going now... I am in a similiar situation, is terrible :(

hi!your problem is very painful to hear but yhenks for bringing it upfront.your husband has a problem and need to be delt with.i' sorry to say that i can be very difficult for him to change so maybe the best way can be to ask for divorce but its just a suggestion because i can not imagine how much pain you are going through.all i know i you a women and diserved to be loved and treated with dignity.think about the rest of the years you are going to spend,can he change?can you survive this?etc.i'm sure you have tried ather alternatives up to this point.but what ever you do think of your happiness.thanks.

I understand completely. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells half the time. If things just doesn't go his way, it's usually blamed on me. I am so sick of worrying about it. He's never hit me, but his anger issues are enough for me to seek divorce.

Even though someone that verbally or physically abuses you may be hurting it's NO excuse to put down other people. They begin to feel trapped and hopeless. I would say build up the strength to leave. Research how a healthy non-toxic relationship should be. Reinforce yourself and know that you have a choice to get out. Don't let them make you feel trapped. Run if you have too. No one deserves to be treated like less of a human being. They will find another person to harm right after you. You need to believe in yourself and when you get away slowly things will get better. Reach out and find possitive information to fuel your fire. :) and good luck the best is yet to come.

My husband is so angry with me sometimes, curses at me, doesnt apologize to me or our kids. Make him change Lord for the sake of our marriage. We divorced because of infedility, cheating, yelling, cursing, etc.

I'm having the same issues. My husband won't admit he's angry with me. I will tell him his actions or lack there of and ask wouldn't you think I was mad if I acted like this with you, he denies it. I don't trust him. I am taking care of my dad who has end stage copd and I have to use the Dallas v.a. Hospital which is under congressional investigation . If he goes into the hospital which he has several times in the past year and a half I have to be there pretty much the whole day and half the night to make sure he gets all his medication. He has pulled his angry spells in the middle of the hospital. He is very jealous I have never given him a reason to be, so much so that he's jeopardized my dads care for accusing me of kissin the guy that comes to give dad baths. He has been cheated on several times by his ex and I feel he is dragging that relationship into our marriage. He won't admit that. We can't sleep together as he snores really loud and I'm afraid he will hurt me because he's accidently hit me in his sleep he flails his arms and legs in his sleep so much so that he's slammed his hands into the wall and not remembered it later. I've had some female problems and been to many doctors to figure out what's goin on and he still accuses me of cheating even though he could have looked at all the doctor bills. I've asked him to go to the obgyn doctor with me he's refused. I told him when I go to get checked again by a different doctor. I want him to go I'm tired of him accusing me of cheating. I am a commited Christian and a product of divorced parents my mother cheated on my dad two years after they were married all the rest of their marriage which lasted 10 years. So I know the damage that can cause. I have my own trust issues but I can't get over misstrust of him if he refuses to be honest with me. I'm at my witts end and go back and forth between staying or leaving not divorcing just leaving when my dads gone. I'm soooo tired of this and often wish I were dead or had never been born.