I have decided to take over this thread which I have found extremely helpful. I am writing a diary of my experiences quitting smoking pot. I started smoking when I was 16 years old, shortly after my parents moved to another part of the country and left me behind. I would generally smoke around an ounce a week. Waking and baking and puffing before bed as well as smoking all through the day. There were even many times when I would leave work or sneak around at work so I could smoke a joint on my lunch break. While I haven't smoked at work in many years, I did have weed in my truck at a camp job in Northern Alberta and the drug dogs sniffed it out within 12 hours of my arriving on site for a company I have worked for for 8 years. I decided to quit the job instead of letting them search my truck and possibly getting a criminal record. It was a long 7 hour drive home reflecting on what I have done with my life. I smoked that day and started weaning myself off almost immediately after that. 5 days later, I decided it was time to quit. Here is my story and I hope I update it every day as I find this great therapy and I hope maybe I can help someone else in their journey if they would like assistance.
Day 0. I have decided that it is time to quit. I lost a job because there was weed in my truck and they had drug dogs that found it. It was a bit of a witch hunt for a substance which I don't believe to be too harmful but it is their rules and I knew the rules. So I have decided to take it like a man and at the age of 40, perhaps it is time to grow up and past the pot. I have played 2 poker tournaments straight and I won them both. One with 62 people and another with 31 people. Tonight I smoked a joint at midnight and said goodbye to my old friend Ganja.
Day 1. I have decided to follow through with this. I have to. I was offered a job at a petrochemical plant nearby that could keep me home until spring. I have always wanted to work there so this is a big opportunity and I HAVE to make the most of this! I think of how proud my kids will be of me. I went and played poker today and my brain was not working very well. I told 2 other players to go and get screwed (they truly deserved it, but normally I would have held back) and I didn't make the money. Not even close. I got home and decided that if I was to start again that it would be a waste of all the struggles I have already put myself through. I have to stay strong. I have no reason to smoke anymore. I could make a huge list of reasons to quit, but there is really no good reason to keep smoking. I fell asleep tonight, proud that tomorrow I could say that I am on day 2.
Day 2. I woke up this morning and didn't feel like getting out of bed. I still had a proud feeling of being sure that I was going to quit. I got up in time to play poker and played fairly well until there were only 12 players left out of 59. I was probably chip leader for awhile even. But I made a few bad plays and entered the final table as a little less than an average stack. I believe I made a few bad plays like the ones I used to make when I was stoned and willing to just push chips in and hope everyone folded. I ended up bubbling but didn't get bubble money because I called a raise with pocket 44. Dumb ass. I left the casino and wanted to smoke a joint but I didn't. I drove home and told my son Adam that his dad is in the middle of quitting. I like to think he was very happy to hear that. I would like to make him proud. I am currently a little over an hour away from going into day 3 and I am very proud of myself. As I am typing this I am feeling chest pains. My head is still cloudy and I feel neck pains and just don't quite know what to do with myself. Sometimes I wish I had more friends around but I have chased most of them away with the weed over the years.
So relate. i have been smoking for more than 40years. It has been my friend for loneliness, depression and motivation to get things done that I am not wanting to do such as mechanical repairs, household jobs etc. i have quit for up to 1 year and felt so clean and part of - instead of someone on the perimeter. I know that i am not a perfectly healthy person. This is my medicine i tell myself. The medicine however disconnects me with people. it creates loneliness and deception as i do not want my grown children and family to see this - although i admit my use and do not lie - everyone knows about it - some accept but many look down upon me and my own brother will not see me as he thinks it is totally evil and will not accept. in my city there are many dispenceries and it is easy to get. I thought I would grow out of this as most of the people my age gave it up many years ago. i know i need to reprogram myself but i am stuck in the tar.
Incoming stream of consciousness:
I'm a 30 yr male... toking for 10 yrs. Stopped cold turkey 3 days ago. Thought I'd look into what other people have gone through when quitting and this was the first thing that popped up on Google.
Last 3-4 years it has been all day, every day from the trusty one-hitter, although i'd normally pack it AT LEAST twice each time. On any given day i probably took 30-50 hits from the one hitter. The normal wake and bake and bedtime hits, plus hits scattered throughout the day, especially when I'd game on the PC (took a hit in between every roundmatch of whatever game I was playing!)
It is hard as i'd really like to get high but I'm doing OK and want to see if stopping can help with my depression and overall lack of energy and motivation.
I haven't been having terrible withdrawals or anything (now when the time comes to quit smoking cigarettes, that will be a different story i'm sure - 12 years sucking on cancer sticks at this point : ) but I can definitely "feel" the lack of THC. I'm not sure how to describe it at this point, but it doesn't feel like the end of the world, which is a good thing.
I do feel like I have lost some interest in video games as the habit was smoke and play, smoke and play, smoke and play, and with removing the smoke part I want to play less. Not sure if this is temporary lack of interest or what.
I am working out some again. Been a long time. Feels good. I will try to stick with it, hopefully gain some muscle back (~15 lbs!!!! I've lost in the last 3 years) that I lost due to depression, poor eating/sleeping, and an office job with little to no physical activity.
My sleep schedule has been so out of whack that I couldn't tell you if the lack of THC is affecting it any. I used to for sure know it was time to crash when i was so high that I couldn't see straight. Now it's more of a guessing game. I've been sleeping from ~7am till ~4pm for the last 3 days, so....
I am a hermit now but I think the depression has caused that. I used to be out there meeting girls and getting laid and whatnot then I started losing my hair more rapidly about 3-4 years ago and that has made me HATE to go out in public unless i HAVE to. I quit going to bars and social gatherings pretty much all together about 2-3 yrs ago now. Depression affected my attendance at work, enough to where I was forced to resign 6 months ago, even after seeking Employee Assistance which didn't help me feel any better about myself or my situation. Been living off savings since then, with no desire to go back to work.
Weed for me has definitely been a coping mechanism with my daily depression, but sometimes it backfired and I'd find myself starring in the mirror feeling completely dismal. I used to drink heavily but I gave that up after almost killing myself a few times.
My family is fractured and I don't really feel like I have anyone to go to, so weed was the friend that was always there for me. It didn't care about anything, it just did its job and made me numb to it all, able to zone out into whatever i chose to pass the time.
Overall, I am just ready to try something new, as what I have been doing for the last 5 years is not what I want to be doing for the next 5. That, and when I go back to work, as someone else said in their post, I'd like to use my own piss to pass the inevitable drug screen for once ( last time I did that was 12 years ago for my first job at the local mall!)
OK, I just read everything I typed and holy sh!t I am all over the place. I certainly didn't intend to spill my guts but OH WELL. I needed to say some of this stuff to someone, even if it is over the internet. Hope somebody can relate and feel not so alone.
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P.S. On a lighter note, I'm not a complete loser, as I feel I may have portrayed myself above lol. I do have a B.S. in Computer Science with ~4 yrs experience in the field. And people still tell me I am good looking, but I can be very critical of myself, so all I see is thinning hair and diminishing muscles compared to when I felt good about myself my entire life up until about 5 years ago.
Feeling clearer today. The usual initial nightsweat and lethargy are waning. I wonder how much of the toxins are cleared before we consume. Some herb gives me an aftertaste in the morning and others don't = some make me feel bogged down and restrained. I need to start to see myself as a non smoker. I need to visualize that person and accept that person. It is difficult to break this habit as I have many triggers and associations. I go to my workshop and it is the first thing that pops into my head. When I am away and have no opportunity I do not crave miss or desire to smoke. I am as conditioned as a Pavlov rat. Even now as I write this I am debating with myself my next move.
Hello! I started coming here last week when I was looking for help to wean off the pot. Like many others on here, turns out I cannot wean. I was the same with cigarettes. What happens is I spend all day basically waiting for 6 pm to roll around & it's obsessive. I've discovered cold turkey is my only viable option in ridding my addictions. . . coffee, cigarettes & herb.I am a 43 y.o. woman who has been wrestled with quitting for about 14 years or so. That is far too many years of betting the self up! I have been smoking daily for 18 years. My consumption gradually increased over time until I stopped working regularly and became an all day everyday smoker. I have read so many post by people ages 28-40 who give the same descriptions I've lived through, I want to say please do try to STOP now, you DO NOT want to end up old like me and still smoking.
I am a college grad, have a masters and had an awesome job for many years in a creative field. I live in a city that is pretty pot heavy but over the years most of my friends have moved on from it, gotten married and have children and now I'm this old lady who's still toking. Sometimes it is really difficult for me to believe I'm the one that got hooked on this stuff & that I am the loser that has not stopped in all these years. It's pretty pathetic! I can do just fine without alcohol, coffee and cigarettes, but the weed, I have just not been able to stop. In the past I have barely made it a week without giving in.
I don't want to go into all the details about how I feel pot has ruined my life but I will state that I relate to many people who have written here. I thank you for your stories, they have helped me. I think pot ultimately ruined my employment situation. IF I didn't smell or appear stoned, my attitude and hate of people contributed. From there it only got worse as I had more time to smoke. The more time I didn't work, the deeper I sank into my hole. I stopped caring about much, stopped hanging out with friends, stop socializing because 1) people BORE me and 2) I couldn't bare to be without my crackpipe for long. I took my one hitter everywhere with me and snuck oneies all the time. I don't LOOK like the loser I am. Looking for work did not appeal to me. I eventually stopped wanting to go out at all. I became a total hermit and told myself and others that I liked it. I did like it but I think it was the pot that made me become this way.
Two weeks ago my cat got sick and I think I was too stoned/sedated to conceptualize how sick she actually was OR maybe I blew it off because it would be a hassle to actually DO SOMETHING about it, UGH, not to mention since I have been such a gross slacker for 3 years I don't have any money (I get free pot monthly). Of course I did take my cat to the vet but I had to put her to sleep because they had no idea what was wrong with her & I couldn't afford to do anything aggressive. This is THE event that woke me up. I blame myself for killing my cat and that is a disgusting reality I have to live with. Reminded me of Trainspotting with the baby. This is how far I've sunk with my love of pot.
My cat's death made me decide once and for all to change. I started applying for jobs like crazy — I never want to be so poor again that I hesitate on a vet visit. I then started reading posts here and tried to cut back but that didn't work for me. I knew I needed to go cold turkey. I decided on a quit date of today 10/29 and I will go to bed tonight clearing one day clean. I am both scared and excited.
Just for the record for the younger people wanting to quit, when I was 30 I was considered an over-achiever, I was able to buy a beautiful house, I had a killer income and an awesome boyfriend. I only imagined my life getting better and instead I have lost all but my house which is now also in jeopardy. I NEVER would have imagined how gutter-like my life would become due to my pot smoking but I am certain it is the one factor that has had the most negative influence on my overall life and well-being.
Day One - - - complete. I AM going to do this this time!
Please don't call yourself an old hag. You are doing what needs to be done, you realize it, and you are going to do it this time. I am just finishing up day 5 and I feel great strong and dedicated to my cause. I would love to chat with you and offer any help you could need. Together, we can do this. It is time for us to grow up. Don't roll it and put it to your lips. That is 3 or 4 minutes that you have to think about what you are doing and realize you are setting yourself back. You can do it "young lady" (my new name for you) Go GIRL!!!!!
Hey Old_ha...errr, I'll go with "young lady" as well. I don't want to call you the other :)
I cant help but feel maybe my giant wall of gut-spilling text may have helped you to decide to post after a week of browsing. In any case I would like to wish you and all others here Good Luck in your/their struggles and thank you for sharing your story.
I have never felt Pot, in and of itself, was a bad thing, but over-indulgence in ANY substance usually is (food, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, etc), and I feel that THAT has been our problem. Over-indulgence, for me anyway, seems to lead to bad-habits and dependencies, behavioral conditioning and emotional triggers, which I never would have admitted before, but I can see that clearly now. I think this is why for super heavy smokers, weaning off is so hard, and cold turkey is the safest way to go. It's ALL OR NOTHING basically. You/we are so used to having it ALL the time, that SOME of the time just doesn't cut it for us. I knew I wouldn't be able to ween off so I smoked the last of my bag one night last week and that was it.
That's where we have to be strong, make the choice, and just plain quit. It's the only way in my opinion.
One piece of advice...definitely cancel/shutdown your free pot source. IF a free bag shows up I'm sure that would be a horrible temptation for you, and I'd hate for you to pick it back up again just because it's "free". I used to have a roommate that sold great pot and I never would have been able to quit when he lived here because it was always around. You've got to distance yourself from it. Let us know how Day 2 goes for you!
Absolutely and ALL or NOTHING kind of girl!
I know my post was pretty harsh on myself but I wanted to paint an unsightly picture because I want to make a clear point to everyone considering quitting but mostly to the younger people realizing they have a problem & for all those with great jobs where all is good, "right now" — years and years of continued abuse may put your life and well-being at risk.
3 years ago my best friend died and then 2 months later I lost my employment due to downsizing and that is when the ugly spiral began. Clearly, I was abusing years before the emotional upsets but the upsets coupled with the pot and too much time on my hands was a losing combination for me! When I think about it now, it's like I COULDN'T do anything to help myself. . . I was crippled by the crippler & depression.
Day 1 went great until bedtime. It took me quite awhile to fall asleep. Sleep was part of the appeal of pot for me as before pot I would stay awake thinking until 4 am nightly. That seems like a long time ago now.
I do KNOW I am not old! I don't even look old or haggish. I have been blessed in my physical appearance. But at 43 AND being the chronic smoker I've been. . . THAT makes me feel past my prime, worn out and haggard.
Thank you both for your kind words I AM GOING TO GET THROUGH THIS THIS TIME!
And Texas — I am very sorry about your job and the K9 search unit that must have been pretty devastating. I think we both had an experience that shook us to the core. Guess we needed SOMETHING strong to make a point of change.
Thank you for your support. WE ARE GOING TO GET THROUGH THIS. I am happy that we are all in this together and there is support and an outlet for our thoughts!