i am a 30y old male with a spinal cord injury. my wife and i have sex quite often. the problem is when i reach my climax i do not ejaculate, instead i go flaccid. i know this has something to do with the injury. doctors have told me that there really isnt anything i can do. i've also tried viagara. please, can someone help?
I'm not really sure what you're looking for here if you've already gotten the opinion of your doctors. Spinal cord injuries, as I'm sure you know, are highly variable in the specific nerves damaged, the extend of the motor function impaired, and the degree to which recovery is possible. Your doctors have probably done extensive testing to determine exactly what was damaged and how badly. None of us are in a position to know anything about the results of those tests.
If you aren't ready to accept what your doctors have told you, you should seek a second opinion, but looking for help outside the medical community, I'm afraid, will only result in your being taken advantage of by the snake-oil merchants.
I have only one suggestion, which your doctors may or may not have suggested, and if they didn't, it may only be because they know your insurance won't cover it. You may want to investigate the possibility of working with a sex surrogate. You would have to discuss this with your wife, because it will involve intimate sexual contact with another woman, possibly including sexual intercourse.
While most surrogates work on psychological issues, what I'm envisioning is more like physical therapy. I'm sure you have had enough experience with physical therapists to understand how they work, so I don't think I need to elaborate the analogy for you. The trick is going to be getting your insurance--or whoever is paying for your rehab--to cover it, but you have a legitimate claim. This is an aspect of your life that is very important to you and your wife and your marriage, and the health of your marriage is critical for the continued well-being of your family. This is a function you were able to perform before, and you shouldn't have to accept that it is gone until every therapeutic avenue has been explored. Hire a lawyer if you have to.
I wouldn't rule out the possibility that your problem might be psychological, by the way. You've been through a very profound life-altering experience and have had to adjust to limitations that were suddenly imposed on you. It would be pretty miraculous if that didn't have an impact on your self-confidence that could ramify into every aspect of your life. You've gone from being the powerful protector of your family to a semi-dependent state, and I could certainly see how that might impact your sexual performance. If you fear that you might fail your loved ones at a critical time, it might prevent you from following through at that other critical time, if you follow me. If this possibility hasn't been explored, it really should be.
If you aren't ready to accept what your doctors have told you, you should seek a second opinion, but looking for help outside the medical community, I'm afraid, will only result in your being taken advantage of by the snake-oil merchants.
I have only one suggestion, which your doctors may or may not have suggested, and if they didn't, it may only be because they know your insurance won't cover it. You may want to investigate the possibility of working with a sex surrogate. You would have to discuss this with your wife, because it will involve intimate sexual contact with another woman, possibly including sexual intercourse.
While most surrogates work on psychological issues, what I'm envisioning is more like physical therapy. I'm sure you have had enough experience with physical therapists to understand how they work, so I don't think I need to elaborate the analogy for you. The trick is going to be getting your insurance--or whoever is paying for your rehab--to cover it, but you have a legitimate claim. This is an aspect of your life that is very important to you and your wife and your marriage, and the health of your marriage is critical for the continued well-being of your family. This is a function you were able to perform before, and you shouldn't have to accept that it is gone until every therapeutic avenue has been explored. Hire a lawyer if you have to.
I wouldn't rule out the possibility that your problem might be psychological, by the way. You've been through a very profound life-altering experience and have had to adjust to limitations that were suddenly imposed on you. It would be pretty miraculous if that didn't have an impact on your self-confidence that could ramify into every aspect of your life. You've gone from being the powerful protector of your family to a semi-dependent state, and I could certainly see how that might impact your sexual performance. If you fear that you might fail your loved ones at a critical time, it might prevent you from following through at that other critical time, if you follow me. If this possibility hasn't been explored, it really should be.