I too had a little lump/bump down there that went away about a week ago. I had two and they hurt bad when I'd touch them by accident. They were also a big part of the cause of my pain whenever I'd have a bm. Since they've gone away I've noticed my bms hurt less. Still painful but not like it was when those things were there. I read that for some they stay and people eventually have them surgically removed but for others they go away completely. I would've suggested that you monitor the size of yours but since you haven't looked down there then nevermind :)
As far as looking down there, I did it from day one. The surgeon had a diaper-like wrapping/dressing on my butt area right after surgery and I went home with it. That night I took the wrapping off because it was so big and uncomfortable. I took a peek and regretted haha! But yeah, I would look at it every day, several times a day (I'm just OCD that way, I guess lol). I'm kind of glad I did because then I was able to notice the slightest difference and change in the area. I'll have to admit though, many times after looking at it I'd feel so down and discouraged because of how awful it looked and kept wondering why it was taking so long to feel better. It seemed like it took forever for it to look like it improved down there. So in some ways it's good you haven't looked because it can sure bring you down!
I hope you get some encouraging news from your surgeon tomorrow and that he understands what you are going through and understands that with your job requiring all that it does, he will give you what you need. Let us know about your lab results too!!
I haven't heard back from my surgeon but will report to you guys as soon as I do! Have a great day everyone!
Hi All,
Firstly it is so helpful to read all your posts. Even though you are still having some problems, it really does help to know that what I am not alone in what I am experiencing in recovery from this operation. I was just having a look at some of the other related threads on this site, and our stories are so common, even though most people comment that the doctor never told them how bad it would be. I don't have my follow-up appointment with my surgeon for another 2 weeks (6 weeks post-op) and I really like him, but I am going to be very truthful about what a terrible experience this has been for me. I might also suggest that he reads the posts on this site.
I need to take my own advice on measuring my progress - remembering to look at the "bigger picture" over time, rather than comparing one day to the next. This 2 steps forwards, one step backwards thing is continuing for me. Yesterday was a good day, practically pain-free, today I am in pain again at work, sitting on my hot water bottle, having taken paracetemol and nurofen with not much effect. The pain is certainly not as bad as it was 2 weeks ago, but enough to distract me from my work (which is why I have logged back on to this site for now!).
Breezie, you have a 100% case for your surgeon giving you more time off work. You are right, the kind of work you do requires your full presence, physically and mentally, and 3 weeks post-op, this is not going to happen. Not to mention the fear of having to run off quickly if you need to use the bathroom - that was also my biggest fear in returning to work.
The urgency to have a BM - I also experience this. Before my operation, I used to try and make time to go every day, in the privacy of my own bathroom, even if I didn't have the urge, I would sit there long enough and it would happen (probably why I got haemorrhoids in the first place). Now I wouldn't dream of trying this - I wait for the urge to come to me. But like you, it comes very early in the morning and with such urgency that I have to run. And then again, the same thing happens about 30-40 minutes later. I am getting up earlier for work to accomodate my BMs before I leave! After this, I go to work, and days like today, I have gone again twice since I got here. Still with urgency, but not as bad as earlier in the morning.
Unlike you guys, I haven't noticed any lumps in the area, although I still feel a bit swollen generally down there. Maybe this is the one symptom I have been spared! But I feel for you having this, and I hope it resolves soon. PITA, I am like you (OCD) and usually have a look about once a day to check on my progress, so I would have noticed a lump there. In fact, when I look there, everything looks completely normal on the outside which is surprising, given the amount of pain/discomfor/urgency/bleeding going on just a bit higher up! If my surgeon were to see it, he would probably be proud of his work, despite my pain and suffering.
Well best wishes for continued recovery to you all and keep the posts coming - they are so helpful.
Firstly a big thank you to you all for continuing to update your progress on this site. It is so helpful to hear how you are all doing, and not feel so alone in this. Even though you are still having some problems, it is a great support to hear that we are going through many of the same things. Especially so when many people were not prepared by their doctors for the horrific recovery from this surgery. I see my surgeon in 2 weeks (6 weeks post-op) and he did tell me that recovery would be painful and last for 2 weeks, but I really don't think he knows the extent of it. I am thinking about telling him to have a look at this site, and read some of the postings to get some real insight!
Breezie, you SO need to have more time off work, considering what your work involves. You really need to be 100% present, both physically and mentally, and you are not there yet. I hope your surgeon supports you in this. I also understand the issue of BM urgency, as I still get this. Prior to my surgery, I would usually set aside some private time at home to have a BM, whether I had the urge or not. If I sat there long enough, it would happen (probably why I got haemorrhoids in the first place). Well, I wouldn't dream of doing this now - I wait for the urge to come to me so that I don't have to strain. But it comes very early in the morning, VERY urgently, and I usually have to run to the bathroom. Then it happens again about 30-40 minutes later. I have to get up extra early to get ready for work, so that I have time to go through this. Hopefully this will settle down in time for both of us.
I need to listen to my own advice more, and remember to look at the "bigger picture" in the recovery time from this surgery. The 2 steps forward, 1 step backwards thing is still happening for me, at Day 31. Yesterday was a good day, practically pain-free, and today I feel I have gone backwards again, with a few hours of pain this morning. It wasn't nearly as bad as it was 2 weeks ago, but bad enough to stop me concentrating on what I was trying to do at work.
PITA, like you, I am a bit OCD and I check my bottom out in a mirror once a day. I haven't noticed any bumps like you both have, so this must be the one symptom I haven't got. In fact, my opposite end shows no obvious evidence of the extreme pain/bleeding/urgency/discomfort etc that I have been through this last month. I think my surgeon would look at it and admire his work, despite everything I have been through! Goes to show, you can't judge a book by its cover.
Well Guys, best of luck at your surgeons reviews. Kind regards.
Thats great that you got out Breezy. It is a major achievement after all you've been through. Perhaps the lumpiness you see is just scar tissue that will shrink over time? And the itchiness just due to the healing process, particularly the nerves healing. The other possibility is a thrush (candida) infection, especially if you have had antibiotics. But you have probably seen your doctor by now and he/she would have checked it for you.
It is a long weekend here in Sydney this weekend, and we are flying up to the Gold Coast in Queensland for the weekend. I booked it a few weeks ago when I was at my lowest after the op, thinking I needed something to look forward to. I am hoping I can stay relatively well and painfree for the weekend. I haven't recovered my normal energy levels yet, and still feel very tired every day, so some R&R might help.
I saw the surgeon today. He said that I was still healing but everything looked okay. He did a rectal check (yow!) to make sure there wasn't an abcess and no signs of infection, so that is all good. He said he took out 2 entire columns of both internal and external hems and a skin tag. I wasn't sure what had been done. He did not have any suggestions on how to reduce the number of BM's a day since they are smooth and well formed. We talked about options but none of them seemed good - for instance, immodium or taking the Lortab may just constipate me and cause other problems. He said it will just take time to heal. He wants me to keep taking the tub soaks after BM's and/or at least 2x a day and to use a hair dryer on that area afterwards to keep it dry - to avoid a yeast infection. But I can only use some Vaseline; no other creams or ointments. He doesn't want me to use anything else in that area. He gave me the okay to use the boric acid suppositories so that should help to keep yeast down as well. There is a swollen lump down there but he said that was just swelling and should go down eventually. He also felt that the sense of urgency to have a BM should get better and is probably due to swelling. He was great about me going back to work and said that was entirely up to me when I felt up to it. He gave me a note for work that said "unknown" for the date so I am covered for as long as I need. I had forgotten how nice he was. I did tell him how anxious I was and that I was worried about this recovery, especially after the diarrhea. But he didn't see any signs of long-terms issues from the diarrhea - just that it set me back a little in healing and recovery. He said I would be fine, it would just take a while. So all in all, a good check up. My husband went with me so he could also hear all of this and remind me when I worry. :)
The lab results were all normal, so no definite answers on why I had all that diarrhea except that it may have been a virus.
So, it just sounds like it will take time. At least I don't have to worry about rushing back to work or that I did any damage with all the diarrhea. I go back to see the surgeon in a month just for a follow up.
Does anyone have a time machine so I can skip ahead a few weeks?
Aussie, I hope you have an AWESOME time this weekend and feel rested, even with the travel. I hope you also have no pain and that this can truly be a restful time. I, too, have been dreaming of a vacation sometime in the future. I will not have any vacation time whatsoever when I get back to work, but even a long weekend getaway would be good.
Take care everyone!
Sorry to hear you have had such a bad day. I hope today has been better for you. It seems to be the nature of this procedure that a good day is followed by a bad day, at least based on my experience, which is much the same as yours. We just got back from the Gold Coast (it rained all weekend!) and I can't say I am much improved either. We had to have breakfast in our apartment and not go out, as I can barely make it through my breakfast without having to run for the bathroom before I finish. I also have about 3 BMs by 10 am, so am scared to be away from a toilet, because I have such urgency. And the pain is not nearly as bad as the first few weeks, but some days it is still there nearly all day. Like you, I am tired of hurting, and then feeling exhausted when the pain finally settles. It has been 5 weeks today since my op and I am also discouraged. I expected to be 100% by now. Then again, I figure my initial pain in the first 2-3 weeks was SO intense, that it will take some time to resolve completely, and will eventually go. At least, thats what I need to tell myself in order to keep going.
My doctor told me to soak in warm salty water, using regular table salt. I'm not sure if Epsom salts would be different, but I know warm salty water is always good for healing.
Thinking of you, and feeling your pain. Keep your chin up, we will get there in the end.
Hi Aussie. It is so good to hear from you! I'm sorry you didn't have the restful weekend you so needed. I can only imagine being at 5 weeks and still having the pain you are having. Wednesday will be 4 weeks for me, and I also thought I would be past this point by now instead of still struggling. Yesterday was very miserable. All I could do all day was lay down. I finally had some relief around 9 pm. It is 8 am here and I have already had 2 BMs this morning and am in painthat is not fading. I don't know what to do differently to reduce the number of BMs or the pain! Saturday I only had 2 BMs and it was such a good day, but I didn't do anything differently than normal, so I'm not sure why things were better. I try to remember that both Soar and PITA on this board had a hard time and then around 6 weeks it seems like things got better for them. So maybe for some of us it does just take longer. I do feel worried about being off work for so long. I was expecting 4-6 weeks, so to be at almost 4 weeks and still have so much pain has me feeling frustrated, worried, angry, you name it! I try to remember that I just saw the surgeon and he didn't seem overly worried. It is just so frustrating when it seems like most people are mostly painfree by this point. Whenever I have to have a BM, I have to work through feelings of anxiety and dread, try to remember to breathe and just let it happen, but the pain every time is exhausting me physically and mentally. I'm sure you know exactly what I'm talking about.
I started using Epsom salts last night so we'll see how it goes. This morning it finally occurred to me that we have very hard water (like many in the US), and that most softener systems use salt. So..... I am going to use the salt and see how it helps. I've tried it without salt for 3 1/2 weeks, and I have been having a lot of swelling and pain. So, maybe the salt will help the swelling and inflammation.
I wonder if not eating much will help with the BMs. I have thought about it, but then I also know I need to eat decent because I'm still healing.
I am thinking of you, too, and sending you many positive thoughts and wishes. I hope you will wake up one day very, very soon and the pain will be gone!
How are you feeling now? I really hope you have had a break from your pain for a while. I do understand how relentless it can be, and how you just want life to get back to normal. I have decided 6 weeks is the likely time for recovery, as that is when my surgeon books the follow-up appointment. This will be next week for me. I have now worked out (it took me a while) that if he expected everything to be healed sooner, he would arrange the appointment sooner. So 6 weeks must be it! At least thats what I'm hoping for. I'm back to my normal work routine, and every now and then I remember that my pain is not as overwhelming as it was, or sometimes isn't there at all. I still rely on my trusty hot water bottle to sit on for comfort though! Do you remember Tom Hanks in Castaway? Well, my hot water bottle has become my 'Wilson'! The last few days, my feelings of urgency to have a BM have been less severe as well, so I am hoping that this is my progression towards recovery, but not counting my chickens just yet, as I know I could still have the 2 steps backwards. I hope you are having more good days than bad now.
Keep the posts up, I am here for you. Best wishes. :)
Hi Aussie. I got a good smile out of your Tom Hanks analogy of Wilson with your trusty hot water bottle! I still cannot sit for very long most days, as in maybe a half hour at the most. The Epsom salts do seem to be helping with the size of that swollen lump. It is still there and still problematic, but smaller than it had been. I'm still having bleeding after BMs but the surgeon said that could go on for a while. I still have some discharge, but also not as much as it was. Yesterday was a better day with only 2 BMs all day! Today I have only had one so far (it's 9 am) but I am still in pain almost 2 hours later. I still seem to have one good day followed by one bad day. I do wonder why it's one good/one bad like that. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to the number of BMs every day and/or the level of pain or length of pain. Today is 4 weeks for me. I thought I would be back at work by now or at least able to sit and to do more. I'm off without pay, and we can only afford to that for so long before it will really hurt us. But I also can't even think about going back to work feeling like I do. I think there is a part of my brain that worries I will never get all the way better. That's just fear, but it's still there in my head. I think you are right about the 6 weeks. Everything I've read said that full healing takes at least 6-8 weeks, but most of what I've read indicates that pain shouldn't last that long. I guess some of us are just not as lucky!
I am getting plenty of TV/movie and reading time in. I am feeling soooo cooped up lately! It's just hard to do much of anything when I still am having so much pain. BUT, I am reminding myself it is better than it was a week ago, at least most days. I am also trying to still take it one week at a time, which is frustrating sometimes and also trying to remind myself it is only 4 weeks. Last week my surgeon said "You are only 3 weeks out" as if I was expecting more from myself than I should be. I guess some of that comes from reading the board where people are back at work so soon and seem to be functioning like normal much sooner. I guess my Wilson would be a crystal ball. HAHA! I don't have a hot water bottle. Do you have a real hot water bottle, like the old fashioned kind? I'm just wondering what you are using so maybe I can look into getting something like it. I do have a microwaveable heating pad - I had it for my neck a year ago, so it is long and thin. I have tried sitting on that and it's not real comfortable. In fact, heat down there (other than in the tub) just doesn't feel comfortable, but maybe a hot water bottle would feel better.
I really appreciate you continuing to be there and check in. I hope that the next week continues to bring you improvement and that your check up with the surgeon is good news!!!
I have an old-fashioned hot water bottle. It's rubber and has a screw top, and I even bought a little woolly cover for it. I fill it with boiling water and literally sit on it! Of course, be careful not to overfill it, make sure you squeeze any air out, and don't put too much pressure on it, as the last thing you need is a burnt bum! But it has truly been the best thing ever after my operation, and seems to work better than any pain killers. Can your husband go out and buy you one? It is Winter here in Australia, so they are easy to get, either in pharmacies or Big W (I think Walmart is your equivalent?).
Your experience is SO much like mine, with good days followed by bad, and pain still lasting for hours, weeks after the operation. But you will get better. Look at the bigger picture. I'm sure 2 weeks from now you will have had a good improvement, as I am starting to see now, even though I'm not all the way there yet.
Once you are back at work and busy again, you won't have time for reading and movies, so enjoy the break (sorry, I do know its not really a 'break' when you're in pain). But make the most of it, your body needs to heal and you are doing everything you can to help it at the moment. Some of us do take longer than others, but you will still have a good outcome in time.
I feel halfway decent when I haven't had a BM in a while. Today I had 2 before 9:30. By noon I felt mostly okay, and right now (almost 8 pm) I feel pretty good except for the drainage and itching. But when I do have a BM, I have to soak in the tub and then lie down for a while, usually a few hours. I am so sorry you have had a similar experience, yet I also have to be honest and say it helps to know that I am not alone or the only one with this experience. I have decided today that I will not even think about returning to work next week, and I will just see how I am feeling towards the end of next week. My immediate supervisor is out of the country for the rest of this week and next week on vacation, and she contacted me today to tell me to just stay home as work is really crazy right now. So, other than not getting a paycheck, it does help to take some of the pressure off of me for another week or so. I think you are right - 2 more weeks will probably make a big difference. I just need to be patient (something I'm obviously not very good at!).
You are right about not having time for any of the books and TV after I am back at work. I am trying to think of it as time to just "be." This afternoon I felt so good that I did several things around the house. I don't think I overdid it, but I was able to do some chores to take the pressure off my husband. So that is a good sign. Again, it's mostly the immediate hours after a BM that are the hardest.
How are you feeling today overall? I hope you are continuing to have improvement and less pain. I am really impressed that you are able to work!!! I could probably work if I could predict my BMs more and they didn't take an entire morning up with pain. My workplace is fine with me being out, but as soon as someone comes back from medical leave they expect you to be 100%. It's just the way they are. So I know if I go back too soon and then wind up having to miss because of a bad day or it is too much too soon, that would actually cause more problems than just staying out. Crazy?
I will keep trying to think positive, and I appreciate your support and encouragement. I do tend to worry because our family has had so many medical issues in the past 8 years, some of them very serious. We have experienced some "rare" medical issues as a family so that is always in the back of my mind. I just have to remind myself that in the grand scheme of things this is not the most horrible thing in the world!!!
Have a great evening/day!