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I shamelessly followed the "tired" path of getting a post-divorce haircut, the crazy haircut I really wanted — and if you've recently become single again as well, you should, too. Here's why the changes we can control are so powerful.

Start A New Hobby

Following divorce or break-up, if you used to spend any time with your ex at all, you'll likely find yourself having more time on your hands, particularly in the evenings. (If you are suddenly co-parenting, you might also be facing a logistical nightmare, but could still find yourself with new swathes of free time.) This is an ideal time to take up a new hobby, one that you have perhaps wanted to get into for a while.

Because many people are rather strapped for cash right after a break-up or divorce, we'll keep it cheap:

  • See if you can grow food from kitchen scraps. Avocado seeds, napa cabbage, and ginger are all candidates.
  • Join a book club, which you can do online as well.
  • Volunteer in a field you are passionate about.
  • Take an online course.
  • Learn a new language.
  • Travel. See parts of your own locality you have never been to before.
  • Learn a new style of cooking, either online or in a cooking class, and then host a dinner party with some friends (and ask them to host some in return).
  • Learn to draw.

As long as it stimulates your brain and takes your mind off things you'd rather not think about right now, you're good to go!

Sell Your Wedding Ring

And your engagement ring, if you have one. Those babies are quite likely to be worth some money, which you could use to have fun with your other post-divorce activities. Selling the symbol of your union with your ex is a very powerful way to acknowledge that your old life has come to a definite end, and you are now making way for different — and hopefully better — things.

Make Your House Your Home

Emphasis on your

If you have remained in the home you shared with your ex, tons of their stuff is bound to keep showing up. Bag it! Regardless of whether your break-up has led you to move house, you have more freedom, now, to decide how to arrange things. Paint your furniture, hang the pictures or artwork you want to see, light scented candles, watch your favorite sport on TV whenever you want, and let your house smell of your favorite foods. Delight in the space you are creating for yourself, and remember that you don't have to spend lots of money to make big changes.

Look After Your Health

Did your relationship stop you from achieving the things you really wanted to, like stopping smoking, going on that weight loss diet, seeking therapy, joining the gym, or going jogging regularly? Most relationship break-ups bring with them a fair amount of stress. Now is the ideal time to make your own health and wellbeing a priority.

Get A Haircut

Remember that friend I mentioned, who banned me from grabbing hold of tired clichés as we were dancing to our favorite punk band? She, of course, was the person who suggested I get a haircut. It doesn't get any more cliché than that, does it? I did it, anyway: I literally cut off the old and reinvented the physical side of me. (I also got some new tattoos to boot.)

You know what? It works. There's a reason we crave change, the kind of change we can control. That physical side of us we so long shared with someone else now belongs, once again, to nobody but us. We get to be crazy if we want to, we get to start over again, we get to do what we want.

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