Dating With A Disability

Talking About Your Disability

Because some (OK, let's not kid ourselves here, most) people are awkward around visible disabilities and potentially even more so around non-visible disabilities, your disability — once your date realizes you have it — may become the center of conversation. When you have a visible disability, chances are that it often finds itself the focus of many of your daily interactions, and you're bored sick of that. You can either get the disability chat out of the way quickly, or you can tell your date that you'd prefer to talk about that later, once you actually know each other a bit. 

You're not under the obligation to be anyone's "learning opportunity". You are not under the obligation to make any able-bodied person feel 
"all nice and charitable" for being on a date with you. You are not under any obligation, period.

However, remember that plenty of people who are otherwise pretty cool still have odd visceral reactions to things they haven't been exposed to before; if you can put up with their knee-jerk reactions and prejudiced actions and comments, it may just be that they're actually hiding a pretty awesome personality, one that will shine through once they get over themselves.

Dating Websites For Disabled People

SteadyHealth isn't in the business of advertising, but I thought I'd let you know, in case you didn't already, that there are indeed a few dating websites out there specifically for disabled people. Using them can be an interesting experience that allows you to meet people who understand exactly what you are going through — because they're in the same boat. Disability fetishism is a thing, of course, so keep an eye out for that too as you decide whom to interact with. 

Get Out There!

In the end, you may simply conclude that the "dating model of finding a partner" is simply not something that works for you or that you enjoy very much. If you find dating to be akin to a meat market and you'd prefer to meet your partner elsewhere, you may instead decide to focus on joining new groups (online or offline) at which you'll meet more people.

READ 5 Signs You Are Subconsciously Prejudiced Against Disabled People

Get Out Of There

What if you're stuck on a date with someone you really don't like and you want a way out? If you face mobility issues, you may need a friend to physically bail you out. If not, a good "my cat is ill, I feel so bad, please come comfort me" phone call can come in very, very handy if you want a polite way to exit a situation that just became too awkward or nasty for your liking. Of course, you can just tell your date you don't like them and you're out of here, too.