Anal Sex post Anal fissure

I had anal fissure surgery 2 years ago. I am able to have anal sex now, but my ability has dwindled to hardly any, where as before I like and enjoyed anal sex all the time. I keep having spasms and swollen and tenderness in the area, along with some unwanted scar tissue I can feel up in there if I use my finger. I was introduced to some trigger point therapy to assist the area's muscles to relax. I'm sure with more practice I could get back to the old me, but it's taking a long, long time to get back to that place. My dr. said it wouldn't be a problem, but I'd just have to have patience. I have a friend who had the same surgery (2ce) and after the first surgery he said he felt "ruined", but after the second he felt liberated to enjoy anal sex again. I don't want to have he surgery again, so I'm looking for something to assist me with healing and getting back to my old self. :-( Anyone have any recommendations? Thanks.

I sympathise with this post. I at age 19-22 went out with a guy i thought was great... naive and blinded by love and thinkin we would be together forever he gave me anal warts. Once he gave me this i found out he was cheating and all the rest that goes with the heartache and pain that comes with the end of ur first serious relationship. Anyway I had to go for treatment all the time, cyrogenesis and steroid sachets.... I was very depressed and verged on suicide around this time. The treatment worked and i had endoscopy to check it was clear, but now I am faced with a life without anal sex, and as a more bottom guy, basically a life without sex. This is because the treatment and virus caused thinning and scarring internally and eveery time i have attempted sex it is interrupted with me ripping and in searing pain. I have no proper sex life, and havent for 4 years, i'm 26 now. I'm an attractive and fit healthy guy, without a partner, because lets face it, who wants to have a b/f and not f**k in the gay world. This is all very distressing to me, and i don't want surgery or to go to the doctors. But what can i do to try and fix this? There is nothing online to help. I hope someon reads this and has a solution...

someone please help....

Sorry to hear about your probs guest - I'm perhaps bi - and had someone damage me with dildo pushing too hard to get me warmed up (tight arse but went in so deep on one push that it did damage). That left me with anal fissure and no anal for last 6 months - perhaps never - at least it's not all for me - but I have gay friends who never do anal - just oral (do it well and you'll have friends lol) and there are options outside anal (even if for time while body gets better) which you should explore. Otherwise, some positions (and lubrication) can make penetration less invasive - try this for what suits you and hopefullly with understanding partner.

so sorry to hear abt the loser bf tht cuz u tht pain.in this time i know not all guys love anal sex.butu should go to the doctor and tell thm wat happen n they will fix tht prblm no need to be embarrass abt it and may b in the future ull meet sme one who will love and adore you for u and not jus for sex a real man understand a woman wen she says i do not want to hve anal sex its ur body n u shud be able to decide whether u want to hve anal sex or not. a guy who gets angry if u say no means he not the one for you.my name is lisa and i loe anal sex but thn my dum ass bf got too excited and rip me there i got angry and punch him in the balls since thn isay whether i want to hve anal sex or not n he doesnt get angry.so go to the doctor get treated and for the boy who gve u tht u shud let all the grls know dont go withhim cuz he carryin an STD

ummmm.....the guy was gay. how will telling all the girls stop him from doing this to guys. for the guy who orginally posted this, I feel your pain. Ive never been able to have anal sex without extreme pain and I want to. I just met a guy and I assume that he will stop talking to me eventually ..when he gets tired of not being able to penatrate me.

Hi,

Have you ever been able to overcome this problem? I am currently in a similar situation from cryo/aldara treatment.

I also stupidly contracted anal warts about 2 years ago at the age of 21 and have been getting cryosurgery (with epidural/cordal anesthesia) every 1 to 2 months... an extremely unpleasant and depressing era i've had to live through... I have not yet tried aldara but I have 2 sachets on prescription. I live in korea and dont exactly understand what the doctor is saying to me but after my cryosurgery today I feel that I might give it a go after a couple of weeks to try something new in the fight against recurrence. has anyone had any success with aldara?? is it only for external because I have been constantly treated for both internal and external... any insights or advice would be great! 

Hello Everyone, 

 

I have been suffering with a chronic anal fissure for the longest myself, and my question is can you still have anal sex while having an anal fissure??     

Not sure if this will even help. I went through the naive love-of-my-life boyfriend gave it to me thing as well. I had to have three procedures to remove the warts spaced two months apart. The last one was a year and nine months ago. I've been free of the warts since then, but as what I believe to be a complication from all of the scarring, I developed some weird skin tags and ultimately a fistula. What a f#*+ing mess! I went through three surgeries before this rather shallow fistula, that caused pain, draining and the smell of butt even through my clothes, was diagnosed. In the meantime, he broke up with me and the stress of it all led to constipated IBS. Yeah...I was depressed. It's tough, but you really have to learn to be happy with/by yourself before and keep in your mind that there is hope. You may find someone that's been through similar struggles.

On the healing. Things for me look better but I still get some rawness at the most external point. (For the fistula they did a fistulotomy, which is basically slicing the tract open, scraping it out and letting it heal like a fissure. The doctor wasn't too worried and it really doesn't bleed anymore. I have had some trouble sitting due to pain on the inside right. The surgeon said he removed some hemroids so that may be why. I am going to see my GP monday and plan to push her to refer me to a CRS (believe it or not i haven't been to one yet after two years). I will probably have sex again and I think with enough lube and careful slow penetration it is possible without pain. Like any case though it should be done with caution because any anal sex may result in small tears that can be responsible for spreading hiv.

One final note. DO NOT SELL YOURSELF SHORT. Be proud of who you are and don't bring yourself down for the things that make you who you are and that make you a good person. True love will happen if you believe and it's definitely not all about sex.

Hello all - 

I have been through some similar issues and thought I would share my experiences. I developed anal warts when I was 21 and the problem persisted for two and a half years. I was fortunate to live in a big city that had a gay health center. I received a cryo treatment to remove one wart that was external, but I had multiple internal warts that cryo did not make sense for. For the internal warts the doctor gave me repeated treatments with cauterization, spaced about 6 weeks apart. The doctor that treated me was incredible. Very professional and he was careful to not cause damage to the healthy tissue and thus minimize scarring. I ended up moving to a different city about two years into all of this and received care at a different gay health center. The doctor there was much more aggressive with the cauterization treatment and everything cleared up after just two treatments.  Now, my sex life is great, I have no issues from the warts. So despite a long and painful chronic issue, it cleared up and has not come back after almost two years. It has no impact on my life anymore. I should note that both doctors were board certified in infectious disease, rather than CRS. After all, warts are from HPV. If I needed surgery they probably would have referred me to a CRS, but I would suggest seeking out an ID specialist at a gay health center if at all possible. They can answer the questions for you about sex and they made me feel very comfortable with the issue.

I'm in a great relationship now but my boyfriend has an anal fissure, which is why I found this thread. He had pain for three years and hasn't been able to have receptive anal sex at all. We have tried but it hurts him too much. He has now gone to a doctor and had the problem diagnosed. He'll likely be having surgery soon to heal this. I wish there was more information out there for gay men about the impact the surgery will have on sex. Unfortunately, my boyfriend is not able to go to the gay health center that I use and his doctor isn't great at answering these types of questions.

Hi, It may be worth while for your partner to ask his doctor to prescribe him Rectogesic and use that for sometime to heal the chronic fissue. In order to help with anal sex, it may be worth while to both of you to invest in some anal dilators or butt plugs and to use those regularly to help the skin get accustom to stretching. Keeping the anus moisturised will help too, maybe apply biooil wen there is no fissue.

Hi,
I found Rectogesic to be a very effective way to heal my chronic fissure, but I had to apply it for many weeks twice a day. Once healed I avoided all anal sex for a couple of weeks and then after that used very very gentle stretching to allow for anal sex again. All back to normal now. Make sure you drink a lot of water and have a lot of fruit, fiber etc. and you can recover. Good luck to you all.

have you had any issues with transmitting anything to sexual partners?

@lisa, doesn't repeated anal intercourse also, cause stretching the rectum and result in an extremely deformed anal orifice gape (large opening)? I'm hetero guy and have seen this horrible looking deformity in soft porn of women a few times! Do women have cosmetic surgery to correct it? I realize the same problem occurs with women's vaginas after repeated intercourse and especially after child birth. I already know that there's cosmetic surgery for that!