Actually honey! i was just about to say the same as njoynlife! You need some professional help here! IF everyone knows how bad he is - and I think he has been so hurt by WOMEN he is now treating you guys worse (getting back at them through you) so I agree that Social Services need to be brought in! It is COMPLETELY confidential and they might be able to help your dad with his obvious anger issues, and DEFINITELY help your sisters. Also don't fear that the only recourse is for Social Services to take away your sisters - this isn't the case anymore! Most SS deparments work with the families to enable the parents to keep the children - YET when that happens they are still in the picture! And they could also help you out in the future - when you become an adult - to have physical custody of them, yet they are there too to help! This is what a friend of mines daughter is involved with now! She has custody of her children, but so does the province! So they are ALWAYS there to help her - with monies, job, daycare etc.
Your dad has MAJOR issues regarding women and doesn't see you as his children, he is taking out that frustration on all of you and that's not right! Can I ask why your mom hasn't stepped in with your other sister - not the youngest one!? If she is not able to take care of your sister, it MIGHT just have to come down to you! BUT you need SS behind you and ALL of this documented first OK? HUGS and strength to you!
Your dad has MAJOR issues regarding women and doesn't see you as his children, he is taking out that frustration on all of you and that's not right! Can I ask why your mom hasn't stepped in with your other sister - not the youngest one!? If she is not able to take care of your sister, it MIGHT just have to come down to you! BUT you need SS behind you and ALL of this documented first OK? HUGS and strength to you!
My 16 year old sister wants to get out but her only thing is she is i know this is stupid of her to think this way but. She is very pop :'( ular at her school and she doesnt want to move to my moms bc she will loose all of her friends and another thing like i said earlier my dad gives her all the money she wants and my mom cant do that. So I dont know what to do she wants to move in with my gramdparents but they arent in good shape to raise a kid at there age and she is a wild child. She is about to turn 16 and my dad lets her go and do as she pleases he lets her go and hang out with 25 year old guys. But with me i never got to go out and hang out with friends and i felt like he hated me bc i was an outcast at school i cut myself out of stress he always got called up to the school bc i got into fights and i ate my lunch in the bathroom. I had one friend and to this day she has stuck by my side through everything. We stopped hanging out for a while bc i didnt want her around my dad. But thats a whole diff. story so let me get back on track. My littlest sister needs my help the most i dont want her with my dad or her mom and it kills my to this day bc she has always called me mommy!!!! But as for my other sister she has a place to go but she doesnt want too.
I TRULY wish I could give you a hug honey!!! :'( My heart just breaks for you! You DEFINITELY need to start the process with Social Services! I am cluing in to what you are saying about your dad, I GET it! And also what you did in HighSchool was a sign of CLASSIC abuse!! It irritates me no end when teachers and administration don't pick up on the major signs like you were exhibiting!
You wont be able to control your other sister! She's 16, and gets whatever she wants! And you can't blame her for wanting to stay in a place where she is "popular" that is everything to most teenagers! And since she is going through similar situations as what you went through then this is the "best" place for her right now, because she can still escape!
The baby is a different thing all together, so you DEFINITELY need professional help here, even though you sound like a VERY mature young lady, battling the system and your father is VERY hard, and you need the system behind you! I promise you honey they will watch him like a hawk, and actually interview you all! He NEEDS to be taken down a few pegs, and to be shown by the authorities that they know he is in the wrong and will take care of him soundly if he continues and doesn't get the help! They will demand that he goes to counselling, and anger managerment and even parenting classes! BUT he wont do any of this if someone doesn't call him on it! I know that's hard for you honey, but so is constantly worrying about your baby sister! What does your husband feel about the situation? Is he older than you?
You wont be able to control your other sister! She's 16, and gets whatever she wants! And you can't blame her for wanting to stay in a place where she is "popular" that is everything to most teenagers! And since she is going through similar situations as what you went through then this is the "best" place for her right now, because she can still escape!
The baby is a different thing all together, so you DEFINITELY need professional help here, even though you sound like a VERY mature young lady, battling the system and your father is VERY hard, and you need the system behind you! I promise you honey they will watch him like a hawk, and actually interview you all! He NEEDS to be taken down a few pegs, and to be shown by the authorities that they know he is in the wrong and will take care of him soundly if he continues and doesn't get the help! They will demand that he goes to counselling, and anger managerment and even parenting classes! BUT he wont do any of this if someone doesn't call him on it! I know that's hard for you honey, but so is constantly worrying about your baby sister! What does your husband feel about the situation? Is he older than you?
Bambi i will try but im pretty sure, i know my mom i live with her every day of my life lol, but wish me luck this is kinda my last resort :-(
LUCK and hugs honey! And please don't talk about last resort OK? I TOTALLY understand how you feel, even though my mom died almost 10 years ago and ALL of this happened to me over 25 years ago it is like yesterday for me! And i live with it everyday and make sure my children NEVER experience what I went through!
I understand that at your age you feel like this is it!!! It isn't, you have to grab that inner strength and defy her actually! IF she doesn't GET IT! when you write it all down, then you have to get it OK? You have to say to yourself " I do NOT deserve this c**p, and she will NOT do me in!, and when the moment arises in 1 year I WILL be gone and never look back"
Suicide has been and will NEVER be the answer honey! It is a permanent end to a temporary problem! And the DEVESTATION and hearache it leaves behind is beyond comprehension! I always tell my boys and their friends - "Today could be the worst day of your life, but tommorrow could be the best!" I always say that a healthy non terminal person does NOT have the right to kill themselves! My mother died from cancer, and I was perfectly prepared to help her in those final moments as she battled for breathe! Because to me seeing someone die a terrible drawn out death is the worst! And it is inhumane! And someone that has a problem that they CAN and WILL overcome does NOT give them the right to back out of life!
You could be the ONE to find a cure for cancer - or have a child that cures cancer, you could be the one that saves someones life tommorrow, and if you take your life the snowball that happens from that is beyond what we can conceive! So PLEASE don't think that way anymore OK honey! I have known boys and girls that killed themselves and the family and freinds left behind are DEAD inside! It is beyond devestation!!!! Any parent of a child that is dying from an illness or has died from an accident will tell you that there is NOTHING worse! And they would totally agree with me in telling you that you do NOT have the right to kill yourself!!!! This is said to you not in anger honey, but with compassion and understanding of what you are going through! Tell her to read this thread!
IF nothing changes after you tell her how you feel, is there anywhere else you could move to - father, grandparents, aunts uncles, friends etc? We took in a boy that was in a bad way when he was 15 - he was like you! And we knew he was on the edge, thus taking him in! Is there anyone out there close to you that could be your haven? Also IF this continues you need to talk to a school counsellor or even Social Services if need be! A child should NEVER be pushed to the brink of suicide, not by bullies at school and DEFINITEL not by their own parents! To me its against the laws of nature!
So promise me you will be here tommorrow and the day after OK? And if you ever feel overwhelmed you need to phone the suicide help line or the kids help line, there are MANY foundations out there to HELP children like yourself!
So I am sending you the biggest hug I can muster! And be open and honest with her, and stand tall honey! And respect yourself enough to know that ALL the c**p she is throwing at you is NOT you! OK?
I understand that at your age you feel like this is it!!! It isn't, you have to grab that inner strength and defy her actually! IF she doesn't GET IT! when you write it all down, then you have to get it OK? You have to say to yourself " I do NOT deserve this c**p, and she will NOT do me in!, and when the moment arises in 1 year I WILL be gone and never look back"
Suicide has been and will NEVER be the answer honey! It is a permanent end to a temporary problem! And the DEVESTATION and hearache it leaves behind is beyond comprehension! I always tell my boys and their friends - "Today could be the worst day of your life, but tommorrow could be the best!" I always say that a healthy non terminal person does NOT have the right to kill themselves! My mother died from cancer, and I was perfectly prepared to help her in those final moments as she battled for breathe! Because to me seeing someone die a terrible drawn out death is the worst! And it is inhumane! And someone that has a problem that they CAN and WILL overcome does NOT give them the right to back out of life!
You could be the ONE to find a cure for cancer - or have a child that cures cancer, you could be the one that saves someones life tommorrow, and if you take your life the snowball that happens from that is beyond what we can conceive! So PLEASE don't think that way anymore OK honey! I have known boys and girls that killed themselves and the family and freinds left behind are DEAD inside! It is beyond devestation!!!! Any parent of a child that is dying from an illness or has died from an accident will tell you that there is NOTHING worse! And they would totally agree with me in telling you that you do NOT have the right to kill yourself!!!! This is said to you not in anger honey, but with compassion and understanding of what you are going through! Tell her to read this thread!
IF nothing changes after you tell her how you feel, is there anywhere else you could move to - father, grandparents, aunts uncles, friends etc? We took in a boy that was in a bad way when he was 15 - he was like you! And we knew he was on the edge, thus taking him in! Is there anyone out there close to you that could be your haven? Also IF this continues you need to talk to a school counsellor or even Social Services if need be! A child should NEVER be pushed to the brink of suicide, not by bullies at school and DEFINITEL not by their own parents! To me its against the laws of nature!
So promise me you will be here tommorrow and the day after OK? And if you ever feel overwhelmed you need to phone the suicide help line or the kids help line, there are MANY foundations out there to HELP children like yourself!
So I am sending you the biggest hug I can muster! And be open and honest with her, and stand tall honey! And respect yourself enough to know that ALL the c**p she is throwing at you is NOT you! OK?
My husband is 18 and he hates that i am upset when my 16 year old sister calls me or texts me saying "he hit me." But she ags it on with him most of the time. But he hates that my baby sister is in it but all he says is just wait and we can try to get her if that is what i want to do. Im scared to do anything now and her get taken away and then i wont have a chance at getting her at all. And another thing we are not financially set either. We have a 10 month old baby and we are on edges end with one of our own. You know? It's just hard!!!!!!
I used to feel like it but now i'm just NUMB. It doesnt seem like anything matters at all. Sometimes I question why I was even born. Before I used to care what i grew to be ,my social status,and trying to be happy with life. But now, its just like what is the point?? Why even try if in the end all you are going to do is die and lose everything youve worked for. EVEN if you leave your "mark" on the world it will eventually be forgotten and fade away.
Dear Deadinside! What you have just expressed is CLASSIC depression honey! You are not alone with these feelings - even if you feel like your the only one! Depression is a REAL Illness! just as real as anyother! Have you been able to talk to a Psychiatrist or Counsellor!? IF you haven't I would like you to make an appointment with your doctor to get referred to one, and also have him/her put you on an antidepressent! IT is is NO way a failure, for seeking help and realizing that you are ILL! If it wasn't for my medications I wouldn't know where I would be now! So ask for some help honey, and if you ever feel close to the edge you HAVE to call a Help Line! There are MILLIONS of us out there honey! So don't ever feel that you are alone with this OK? a BIG hug and support to you!
TRUMPET!!!!? How are you doing honey?!
I'm still having problem with my dad and my sister now. My sister is turning 16 monday and she is having a party friday. I dont know how to tell my dad that I am so mad at him. I'm mad bc when I was 16 my dad kicked me out of the house and I had no where to go. I got pregnant when I was 15 but my dad got tired of me being to tired to do anything so he kicked me out the day before my 16th birthday. But for my sister the POPULAR one he is throwing her a BIG BIG party and I'm so mad at him and I dont want to go to her party. But I dont know how to tell them that I'm not coming!!!!! I'm tired of not standing up for myself anymore, I mean used to i would say whatever was on my mind and now that I'm a mother and I'm married I have matured alot for my age I think. But I lost all of my spunk ya know I dont have a back bone, and as my mom says I have no balls so she told me I could borrow hers lol!!!!!! Anyways I know it shouldnt bother me this much bc I'm married I have my own life and I'm a mother but I'm just so angry. And I'm sick possibly have cancer and my husband says you dont need all this stress he tells me dont stress over this but I cant help it. How do I tell my dad and sister and explain this to them. And my sister shoves it in my face that she gets more than I ever did so what do I do? HELP PLEASE!!!!!! :'(
Just tell them straight honey! It has taken me ALL my life to actually have enough of my selfish sister! And it is something my dad told me! "You cannot change someone else, the only thing you can change is how YOU deal with them!" So they need to be told that they are selfish and mean! And just say that you wont be attending the party, and you don't have to give them a reason! Just say "I'll be spending it with MY family!" And IF your sister asks you, just tell she has been heartless and unkind and you're not taking her c**p anymore! I doubt your dad will say too much too you, because as you get older, he will be afraid of what you say back!
Me and my mom always nealry have arguemnts especially with my at this age 15 .. as a teen both you and your mom will have differences over different things but really what you must understand is she still loves you. Sometimes my mom will call me and tell me shes sorry if she had a really bad go at me and that she loves me. Even if your mom doesnt say im sure she does !
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She took everything away but i jus now got it back. She look at it and said "well your 16 arnt you your still alive right your not in a hospital, you made it to 16 be happy" and then she got ready and left her friends to the club or whatever.
Hi Honey! First of all a HUGE hug to you!!!! NOW Since she did that, I would suspect that she has a drinking problem or a drug! OR just a horrible human being! SO now I want you to do is phone Social Services and ask fore some help! You are 17 so you can actually leave the situation. Are there ANY family members able to take you in - first of all? What I would suggest is finding out if there is any one that would be able to take you in! THEN EVERYONE needs to start knowing the truth about how she is treating with you! MANY times emotional abuse - as she is doing with you - goes undetected and is like the dirty little secret! She can say whatever she wants to you, behind closed doors, and no one will know how despicable she is treating her own child! Becaue this goes agains NATURE!! So IF you can find someone to take you in, then you will also need to talk to Social Services - or better yet a counsellor at school, he/she can start the ball rolling on your behalf! I forgot the name of the law about divorcing from your parents, but there ARE laws to protect you honey! And what she is doing is WRONG! But don't take on yourself OK? This is HER problem! You just have to reach out for help, from an entrusted adult! And they WILL step in! I would definitely suggest talking to your school counsellor ASAP! And see what they say! HUGS!!!
I have no were to go i have to stay here in my home with her, im like a serf bound to the land with no where to go she protects me but she is allowed to punish me. Im going no where because i cant. Im sorry