I had an abortion 5 years ago. I now have 2 beautiful girls and am happily married. The father of the child I aborted was my partner at the time, but is not my now husband. I never gave myself the time and energy to truly heal the way that I should have. This is in the back of my mind now and I realize that if I don't heal it it will manifest itself in other ways that are not useful to me. What has worked for others to heal the grief, sadness, and loss experienced?
Do go and see a doctor and ask her to recommend some psychiatric help. This will really help you.