What a day!!!! I got to work late because the buses were all upside down, back to front and inside out. i was swearing at the bus stop as it just wasnt my lucky day-I could feeel the I want to go back to bed feeling. I think your right I actually thinkI have managed to give myself vertiog and its not as if I am that tall 8-| Illok down and then look up , I am wahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! WTf is happening to me???????I had to get a lady to escort across the road..OMG
Got to work and it was ok, I made a massive error on the till though and I felt dreadful , so irritated and wanted to hideAnyway, everyone was fine really understanding..i cant believe I am retreating back to this dizziness thing- but I dont know if its related to bad moods and feeling angry towards the world.Just dont know.
oh god and if I tell you this |i hope want get upset with me, But bloddy application form from Housing has been sent back to meSo I am going to walk up to my Housing department on Monday and hand it in. I was so upset when i got it back
Tomorrow Iam taking the children to the movies and then we are going to choos a gnome for them each from my work , adopt a gnome and the moey goes to the autistic society.
Mum then raided my wardrobe for a "the worst dressed party" cheers mum , found it funny though
Right id better go write a list of important things to do on mOnday morning. hope to hear from you soon, Katy
Got to work and it was ok, I made a massive error on the till though and I felt dreadful , so irritated and wanted to hideAnyway, everyone was fine really understanding..i cant believe I am retreating back to this dizziness thing- but I dont know if its related to bad moods and feeling angry towards the world.Just dont know.
oh god and if I tell you this |i hope want get upset with me, But bloddy application form from Housing has been sent back to meSo I am going to walk up to my Housing department on Monday and hand it in. I was so upset when i got it back
Tomorrow Iam taking the children to the movies and then we are going to choos a gnome for them each from my work , adopt a gnome and the moey goes to the autistic society.
Mum then raided my wardrobe for a "the worst dressed party" cheers mum , found it funny though
Right id better go write a list of important things to do on mOnday morning. hope to hear from you soon, Katy
Im really worried about these 2 wee bumps in the iddle of mynose. They want go away and get worse late in the month. Ive had them for months. They look like a bite mark-but there not-do you have any idea what this could beand how to get rid of it? They are really annoying me!
Allergies can show up in the skin too! That is why I wanted you to be tested for any allergy! There IS something going on with an allergy of somesort = no matter what you think! You feel "Yucky" almost every day, you have sinitus, throbbing head, ringing in the ears, vertigo etc, and itchiness and now bumps! STRESS, DEPRESSION, ANXIETY doesn't cause bumps on the skin Katy!!!!
Why did they send the application back, when you've already had a meeting with them about it and they've called you?!! Have you phoned them about it?
You CANT give yourself Vertigo - it's impossible - you either have a sinitus problem, or it is from panic!
You HAVE HAVE HAVE to write down everything that is going on with you, and carry that with you so IF you ever go to the doctors, or see the drinking nurse, you will have it on you!
I' having a little withdrawls today >:( ! It's because I was taking so many pain killers for my head that my body has become used to that dosage! So anyway I wont talk too much! And STOP thinking I'm mad at you! I know how you feel, I am a straightforward person Katy and I will tell you if you are ticking me off OK? I am being your friend and giving you support and advice - BECAUSE I have and still have been there! So myself helping you is also helping me come to terms with some bad things that have happened to me too= due to the fact that we are SO similar! OK? Talk to ya later buddy!
Why did they send the application back, when you've already had a meeting with them about it and they've called you?!! Have you phoned them about it?
You CANT give yourself Vertigo - it's impossible - you either have a sinitus problem, or it is from panic!
You HAVE HAVE HAVE to write down everything that is going on with you, and carry that with you so IF you ever go to the doctors, or see the drinking nurse, you will have it on you!
I' having a little withdrawls today >:( ! It's because I was taking so many pain killers for my head that my body has become used to that dosage! So anyway I wont talk too much! And STOP thinking I'm mad at you! I know how you feel, I am a straightforward person Katy and I will tell you if you are ticking me off OK? I am being your friend and giving you support and advice - BECAUSE I have and still have been there! So myself helping you is also helping me come to terms with some bad things that have happened to me too= due to the fact that we are SO similar! OK? Talk to ya later buddy!
Dont you think Dawn, its amazing what pain killers the doctors give you? When my dad went to get his toe operated on, he got a metal thing put in his big toe, due to arthrits etc, and he was on so many things-he complained he wasnt getting neough pain relief.The doctors in the hospital wouldnt give him anymore despite his heda being on the table in agony. So when he got home he overprescribed mrophene and got through it eventually.
So I can imagine what the withdrawals must be like. Drugs are drugs ( I guess) and really our bodies are each to their own and we all have different stabilizers to keep them in check. My dear grandad used to say"Listen to your body and give it what it craves-it craves it for a reason" I think I listened to him too well XD :$
Part of seeing photographs of them being at my grandad house irritated me. Theres a big painting of him , and it was the one which was displayed at his humanistic cremation-seeing it and him in the photographs made my blood boil. I told him last night that it hurt-dont know why I even bothered. he said"I was invited by your mother , so I dont know where you are coming from" When my nun turned up today, I said Bismarck is golfing -dont know when he will be back. She was a great help today, and I was greatful to her for that, but she hadnt heard of bismark so hadnt a clue what I was on about
Im not myself today, I cant help the feeling-whats the point and wanting to dissapear. the other thing I am doing is this, perhaps we could just share this flat like flatmetaes and get on with it that way.
Oh Dawn this absolutely gorgeous guy came to my work -totally out my league-and I just got intimidated by his charm and good looks. Blonde and tanned and complaining that hed put a bit of weight on. I was thinking -hey a man whose honest 8-| This is the thing about me-I dont normally check me out( very rarely)
Ok, the housing thing need to get sorted dso that the wheels can start turnng again. I have no clue as to why it ended up through my front door ( th eaplication form)
Ive decided not to ring my sister until I am better in myself.
I ate some chunkny chips at tea time , 4 in total and havent stopped feeling iitchy and blotchy. WheN I was a student, that cheesey chips were a comfort-now I can hardly touch them.
Anyway, just came on here-wanted to explain what got me so upset today. Sometimes I look at my ex partner and think how on earth????? Other times I think he does have a genuine innocences about him.ouch it doesnt matter-our realtionship is finitoo
I was a bit distressed as well as everyone at owrk has worked out my age-im much older than most of them. Anyway, i have to go get the kiddies to bed Im just rambling right now. Hope your all right and get loads of rest. Ive started to take starflower oil , n the hope it will help other things out too. take care, Katy
So I can imagine what the withdrawals must be like. Drugs are drugs ( I guess) and really our bodies are each to their own and we all have different stabilizers to keep them in check. My dear grandad used to say"Listen to your body and give it what it craves-it craves it for a reason" I think I listened to him too well XD :$
Part of seeing photographs of them being at my grandad house irritated me. Theres a big painting of him , and it was the one which was displayed at his humanistic cremation-seeing it and him in the photographs made my blood boil. I told him last night that it hurt-dont know why I even bothered. he said"I was invited by your mother , so I dont know where you are coming from" When my nun turned up today, I said Bismarck is golfing -dont know when he will be back. She was a great help today, and I was greatful to her for that, but she hadnt heard of bismark so hadnt a clue what I was on about
Im not myself today, I cant help the feeling-whats the point and wanting to dissapear. the other thing I am doing is this, perhaps we could just share this flat like flatmetaes and get on with it that way.
Oh Dawn this absolutely gorgeous guy came to my work -totally out my league-and I just got intimidated by his charm and good looks. Blonde and tanned and complaining that hed put a bit of weight on. I was thinking -hey a man whose honest 8-| This is the thing about me-I dont normally check me out( very rarely)
Ok, the housing thing need to get sorted dso that the wheels can start turnng again. I have no clue as to why it ended up through my front door ( th eaplication form)
Ive decided not to ring my sister until I am better in myself.
I ate some chunkny chips at tea time , 4 in total and havent stopped feeling iitchy and blotchy. WheN I was a student, that cheesey chips were a comfort-now I can hardly touch them.
Anyway, just came on here-wanted to explain what got me so upset today. Sometimes I look at my ex partner and think how on earth????? Other times I think he does have a genuine innocences about him.ouch it doesnt matter-our realtionship is finitoo
I was a bit distressed as well as everyone at owrk has worked out my age-im much older than most of them. Anyway, i have to go get the kiddies to bed Im just rambling right now. Hope your all right and get loads of rest. Ive started to take starflower oil , n the hope it will help other things out too. take care, Katy
Hi dawn- Im not great today, feel sore and my belly has grown into a large muffin XD
Howse your head, and pani killers , withdrawal etc How are you doing?
My sister rang me, weve made up. Told her about thinking about going on antabuse-"she says "dont do it" Her appparently ex alcoholic friend gave her a talk about me, and so she rang. Anyway, the stuff she told me -hmmmmmm o.O It diesnt matter!
Looking on things though-I dont perceieve myself as sick or anything like that-but reading about the borderline personality and I thin kIt desribes me well, sensitive to rejection, the whole package seems to fit actually.
Anyway, i feel realy fat and tired today, my foot is giving me eye watering pain across its joints, but im not complaining XD XD XD
Anyway, ive got to go take becca out, take care, hope your well, katy
Howse your head, and pani killers , withdrawal etc How are you doing?
My sister rang me, weve made up. Told her about thinking about going on antabuse-"she says "dont do it" Her appparently ex alcoholic friend gave her a talk about me, and so she rang. Anyway, the stuff she told me -hmmmmmm o.O It diesnt matter!
Looking on things though-I dont perceieve myself as sick or anything like that-but reading about the borderline personality and I thin kIt desribes me well, sensitive to rejection, the whole package seems to fit actually.
Anyway, i feel realy fat and tired today, my foot is giving me eye watering pain across its joints, but im not complaining XD XD XD
Anyway, ive got to go take becca out, take care, hope your well, katy
Well another strange day here. Went to the pics with yongest -she enjoyed it! Then we went to get school shoes and who was sitting getting her new shoes, my eldest and him. so he paid for them he he! anyway, they left me there with Becca, and on walking home Princes street came to a halt, suspected fire in M and S and no one was moving. Old man started to panic and shake becca was getting crushed,,,then eventually started to move > Honestly theres going to be a major one of these days. Then got to the store where Id said id meet him etc and no one ther, and then I get anxious - god knows why I get anxious. becca statrts to get moodie about the toys etc ,....so I end uup dragging her out and just coming home. On route home neighbours are fighting in the street and the police have been called. Ridiculous!!!!!!!! Apparently one neighbour hit the othe neighbours child (mother) and ww3 broke out or would that be ww4. nose is stuffed, ears watery and feel grotesque..thinking about taking slimming pills just to make me feel better for the next few days. Pfff!!! Grr
Oh, Im choked now- and all achey-not heard from you -are you all right? Anyways, going back to bed-feel dreadful. Worried about his dad.hes not been out of bed the last 4 days and incredibly ill.
Sorry dawn I am just going to waffle here about the internet and the useless information it sometimes provides. Right, I was reading up on BPd-if you knew my history and behaviour as the introverted child, you wuld understand some of my thinking-anyway, ebough of tht, -so then I googgle more and watch a c**p video about it. Something that really annoys me, You know if someone is sitting and they are al bone and obviously have an ED well , if someone is sitting with blubber hanging over their seat -EXCUSEME, but they have just as big sorry I shouldnt - but they have just a big as problem, sorry not a big ass problem OmG. yeah, I fear, that i will get fat, and I restrict meals ,but I have this argument with myself that as I am a small person I dont need threee meals a day etc , and its ludicrous to think I ever would need that much food.
Anyway, thats just my opinion, someone who is obese either has a problem with self perception, depressed and lack self respect, Someone who has an eatinf disorder has all of the above plus some emotionally emtpy, eating away at your body typr, but feeding the empty -it also seems to be aprt of the addicitive type as well its addicitive self starvation, as is alcohol, as is eating fatty acids-god I ramble. Im not even making my point hear loud and clear. nope-it all adds up and anyway. some of the stuff on BpD fits me and eplains a lot about me. but this american videio took it too far. This girl who is massive and who had planned to kill her parents in a gang etc was given the diagnosis, Right, heres me thinking , thats the wrong diagnosis, killing your parents is more sociopathic...yah , I get that i love and total l admire, tooo I hate and disslike and want to kill you thing...uh huh-i undersdtand that -does that not come from pure jealousy and anger and resentment that the one person whoever you are-cant be that person of admiration-is that not where the resentment comes from?????I know Im like this sometimes with certain people etc) For instance as a teenageer ( ok ) this is embarasssing , but at High school I failed my S grade english - not that you can really fail, and my mum made me do my higher grade english....i totally admired my english teacher, I thought she was the bees knees,...But the thing that was missed out was that my previous english teacher was a complete nutter and had down graded me, and it was bloody obvious-my mum used to take my s grade essays to english teachers at her school and grade them for me!) to get my confidnedce back up, and 2) to not feel like she was just acting as my mother, But she was just acting as my mother so it never got resolved, My previus english teacher, had thrown a stone paperweight, had given me a grade 2, to a grade 6 in the space of a couple of days, I used to miss the bus to high school as I dreaded his classes, By the time I sat my exam-I couldnt care less and wanted my mum to accpet that I was a failure, by this tim she got really pushie with me, I was in big mix up and eneded up vomitintg everytime before going to higher english, and obsessively doing my hoemwerk and tioiling with all of it, It was a huge hurdle and had become a huge proble, To this day I stioll wory m, and their are bits where I really stuggle form tim e to tim e with grammar and so forht. but none of that was fair on me as a pupil who only had acne!
Anyway, I just thought that that film was a wee bit insensitive to someone who has Bpd, because if you recognise you have it , it doesnt make you a sociopath-despite the fact i want a hitman to end someone else creation I dont really as I have a conscienece and the kids would harte me and would be getting a hitman to do mwe in and so the circles of failure moves on.Ok Ive lost my point...My foot is realy sore today, the wind is up and Im wondering if this barbecue will still go ahead. Ive just told yo one of my biggest secrets-Honestly, I used to get so embarassed by my feelings, I remeber crying to Nikki ( ny sister ) and asking her if she thought I was a lesbian ( because I got so obsessed with my engkllish teacher) and then when I passed my H grade, I asked to do sixth year studies and she said "NO! Even though it was my right...I thenhated her with vengence, This meant that she didnt believe in me, and that they probably thought I was an incapable
The strange thing for me though -is that that stopped-when I started at Uni and things my obsessiveness over others that i thought were brainier etc didnt matter, I was happy just being me. But those feelings , they come and go. I do think a lot of it is to do with envy though, and selff acceptance of who the hell you are wand what little or lots of potential you have, and weighing it up. My sister alwasy says"You are a .......-you can do anything you want to". It doesnt stick, I feeel I am incapable, i can barely hold a shop job down, and that makes me vulnerable and it doesnt matter if someooen who knows me says it"your better than that Kayty , you can do better, I know yo " it deosnt matter, I cant believe it, as I can be howling inside, feeling like a complete ( idont know ) mrs Bean, Soory I know Ive not heard from you and I am on a rant an djust basically having a conversation with myself - so you can ignore me if you want to. Actually I better go, ive got to go and hang up a washing, have a bath m do the dishes...And also , it must be me, if I feel threatened by just about everyone, and everyone is a bully. Im sure as I know that when I was little and cried everyday before going to class( that they were gong to put me in a special school) just like the threat of antabuse, I stropped crying and slowly started to go to school, but because I had made such a vulnerable seen to begin with, it intensified everything, and people would call me specky four eyes and big spec and mimc my squint, ( my big sis was the best at that one) I used to just cry, and then it would be, mummies little baby m,, crying all the time, and oh god, primary school was helll for me..primary 7 was good, Made a good friwend , my eyes were straight, and actually that was a good year for me, Felt really grown up,,,,my god. My eldest will soon be in primary 7 and hear I am living the old days, mental!!!! IOOk, Ive got to go, I dont even know if any of this makes any sense to you, I dont know if it will to me either, Im just writing/ranting. Id better go, Take car eof you-and I hope everything is ok, as Ive not heard from you) Hopeyour all right ( and family) take care, Katy
Anyway, thats just my opinion, someone who is obese either has a problem with self perception, depressed and lack self respect, Someone who has an eatinf disorder has all of the above plus some emotionally emtpy, eating away at your body typr, but feeding the empty -it also seems to be aprt of the addicitive type as well its addicitive self starvation, as is alcohol, as is eating fatty acids-god I ramble. Im not even making my point hear loud and clear. nope-it all adds up and anyway. some of the stuff on BpD fits me and eplains a lot about me. but this american videio took it too far. This girl who is massive and who had planned to kill her parents in a gang etc was given the diagnosis, Right, heres me thinking , thats the wrong diagnosis, killing your parents is more sociopathic...yah , I get that i love and total l admire, tooo I hate and disslike and want to kill you thing...uh huh-i undersdtand that -does that not come from pure jealousy and anger and resentment that the one person whoever you are-cant be that person of admiration-is that not where the resentment comes from?????I know Im like this sometimes with certain people etc) For instance as a teenageer ( ok ) this is embarasssing , but at High school I failed my S grade english - not that you can really fail, and my mum made me do my higher grade english....i totally admired my english teacher, I thought she was the bees knees,...But the thing that was missed out was that my previous english teacher was a complete nutter and had down graded me, and it was bloody obvious-my mum used to take my s grade essays to english teachers at her school and grade them for me!) to get my confidnedce back up, and 2) to not feel like she was just acting as my mother, But she was just acting as my mother so it never got resolved, My previus english teacher, had thrown a stone paperweight, had given me a grade 2, to a grade 6 in the space of a couple of days, I used to miss the bus to high school as I dreaded his classes, By the time I sat my exam-I couldnt care less and wanted my mum to accpet that I was a failure, by this tim she got really pushie with me, I was in big mix up and eneded up vomitintg everytime before going to higher english, and obsessively doing my hoemwerk and tioiling with all of it, It was a huge hurdle and had become a huge proble, To this day I stioll wory m, and their are bits where I really stuggle form tim e to tim e with grammar and so forht. but none of that was fair on me as a pupil who only had acne!
Anyway, I just thought that that film was a wee bit insensitive to someone who has Bpd, because if you recognise you have it , it doesnt make you a sociopath-despite the fact i want a hitman to end someone else creation I dont really as I have a conscienece and the kids would harte me and would be getting a hitman to do mwe in and so the circles of failure moves on.Ok Ive lost my point...My foot is realy sore today, the wind is up and Im wondering if this barbecue will still go ahead. Ive just told yo one of my biggest secrets-Honestly, I used to get so embarassed by my feelings, I remeber crying to Nikki ( ny sister ) and asking her if she thought I was a lesbian ( because I got so obsessed with my engkllish teacher) and then when I passed my H grade, I asked to do sixth year studies and she said "NO! Even though it was my right...I thenhated her with vengence, This meant that she didnt believe in me, and that they probably thought I was an incapable
The strange thing for me though -is that that stopped-when I started at Uni and things my obsessiveness over others that i thought were brainier etc didnt matter, I was happy just being me. But those feelings , they come and go. I do think a lot of it is to do with envy though, and selff acceptance of who the hell you are wand what little or lots of potential you have, and weighing it up. My sister alwasy says"You are a .......-you can do anything you want to". It doesnt stick, I feeel I am incapable, i can barely hold a shop job down, and that makes me vulnerable and it doesnt matter if someooen who knows me says it"your better than that Kayty , you can do better, I know yo " it deosnt matter, I cant believe it, as I can be howling inside, feeling like a complete ( idont know ) mrs Bean, Soory I know Ive not heard from you and I am on a rant an djust basically having a conversation with myself - so you can ignore me if you want to. Actually I better go, ive got to go and hang up a washing, have a bath m do the dishes...And also , it must be me, if I feel threatened by just about everyone, and everyone is a bully. Im sure as I know that when I was little and cried everyday before going to class( that they were gong to put me in a special school) just like the threat of antabuse, I stropped crying and slowly started to go to school, but because I had made such a vulnerable seen to begin with, it intensified everything, and people would call me specky four eyes and big spec and mimc my squint, ( my big sis was the best at that one) I used to just cry, and then it would be, mummies little baby m,, crying all the time, and oh god, primary school was helll for me..primary 7 was good, Made a good friwend , my eyes were straight, and actually that was a good year for me, Felt really grown up,,,,my god. My eldest will soon be in primary 7 and hear I am living the old days, mental!!!! IOOk, Ive got to go, I dont even know if any of this makes any sense to you, I dont know if it will to me either, Im just writing/ranting. Id better go, Take car eof you-and I hope everything is ok, as Ive not heard from you) Hopeyour all right ( and family) take care, Katy
Ok right, im reallly really dizie, in fact fell over in the bathroom. But its stress, ive the childrens cousins playing and there so close, but just had a bath , and tto hot, and cant cool down, -couldnt find my all fatithful dress, the one I wear when i feel down, too perk me up. I went mad :-S :-S :-S :-S Like somenthing frm a teen movie, Borrowed exs sudofed as cant cope with this stuufffff around my eyes and nose, and head feels cloudy, anywa so i went mental at him-was one horrible b***h ( well ic cant stand him lying about on my mums couch and GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRr!!!!!)So In room now and crying, i wan tto go a walk, but too scared too.i hurt my back my bum and my bob when I feel and leg is all bruised but not badly, wish hed done it so i could just b on my own, but then feel sad that this is it, and feel sad that he thinks it ok to treat people this way, and feel sad about mum. dad gave me the best piece of advice...Just do everything with the girls,THAT you enjoy doing and come and visit me more often"Im now not going to the barbecue as i feel sick , and children are happily playing with theri cousins.Dawn no offence- but I am worried -where are you??? :'( Ok, im going now, may read others here, I hope your all right? Wish i had cherrier news.
I don't like titles! I think it gives people a way out! When you say someone is Bi-Polar or Manic etc! Then it kind of takes away personal responsibility! I am not saying that there aren't people out there that suffer - of course not! BUT there are just people that take no responsibility because they have these labels! I don't consider myself BPD and I think neither should you! You and I are SO similar it's freaky! We had similar upbringings, similar life situations, family, self thoughts etc. I don't buy into a title, I just think "what has happened to me has happened and I dealt with it the best way I know how!" What addict DOESN'T have a past? What addict DOESN'T have something missing in their lives? We had self loathing, bad relationships, favoritism, NIGHTMARISH things happening to us! And we just cope the way we can right? I drank and took drugs, you drink! That's how we coped! that's why I don't go to casinos, I would literally sell my house!!!! That's how addictive I am!
You are having one hell of a reaction to something Katy!! With your swelling and itchiness and watery eyes etc. WOW!!!! You must feel like c**p!!! By the way I'm a PRO about Panic Disorders and Anxiety - your physical symptoms that you are experiencing right now have NOTHING to do with Anxiety OK? It's a MAJOR allergy of somesort! It could be mold - that you can't see! Dust mites, washing detergent, perfume etc. If only you would tell your doctor about all of the symptoms you've been having then you would feel so much better when you got tested. Like I said Katy! My eldest had the little pin pricks all the way down his arms - they ALL blew up like you wouldn't believe! He's alergic to EVERYTHING!!! He gets VERY irritable and scratchy etc. His eyes and nose run ALL the time! And he gets headaches, the thing is we can't change what he's alergic too - just have to give him Benedryl!
It's such a shame you let him destroy your day out with the girls! You give him too much power! You CAN'T change him Katy, all you can do is change you! and the way you deal and think about him! Just like your dad said, just do stuff you enjoy doing with the girls and get out of the house and away from him!
I've been out most of the day - I sell crystals and jewelery at a local market here! My husband and youngest are on holidays - couldn't go because of my head. So my eldest stayed home with me - bless him! He's 17 and didn't really want to go to where we usually go anymore! But it's nice seeing him inbetween his dates!!!! That kid! I swear Katy I'll be a Grandmother within the year - the way he's going anyway! I was doing laundry and when I took out the washing there was a condom in the bottome of the washer!!!!!!!! o.O o.O o.O I said to him "Guess what I found today?" his reply - as straight as an arrow "Do you still have it?!" o.O 8-| 8-| I know I shouldn't say this, but I can't wait to be a grandmothe!!! I wanted 7 children - 6 boys 1 girl! And was DEVESTATED when I had to have a hysterectomy at 35!!! :'( But I have my God children having babies left right and centre, and one of my closest girlfriends has a little boy who will be 1 next week. I LOVE him!!! I keep saying to him "Come to mom!!!" This is my friend o.O o.O ! ANYTHING he wants I get for him, even if he doesn't know he wants it! I could just eat him!!! They grow up too fast heh?
You are having one hell of a reaction to something Katy!! With your swelling and itchiness and watery eyes etc. WOW!!!! You must feel like c**p!!! By the way I'm a PRO about Panic Disorders and Anxiety - your physical symptoms that you are experiencing right now have NOTHING to do with Anxiety OK? It's a MAJOR allergy of somesort! It could be mold - that you can't see! Dust mites, washing detergent, perfume etc. If only you would tell your doctor about all of the symptoms you've been having then you would feel so much better when you got tested. Like I said Katy! My eldest had the little pin pricks all the way down his arms - they ALL blew up like you wouldn't believe! He's alergic to EVERYTHING!!! He gets VERY irritable and scratchy etc. His eyes and nose run ALL the time! And he gets headaches, the thing is we can't change what he's alergic too - just have to give him Benedryl!
It's such a shame you let him destroy your day out with the girls! You give him too much power! You CAN'T change him Katy, all you can do is change you! and the way you deal and think about him! Just like your dad said, just do stuff you enjoy doing with the girls and get out of the house and away from him!
I've been out most of the day - I sell crystals and jewelery at a local market here! My husband and youngest are on holidays - couldn't go because of my head. So my eldest stayed home with me - bless him! He's 17 and didn't really want to go to where we usually go anymore! But it's nice seeing him inbetween his dates!!!! That kid! I swear Katy I'll be a Grandmother within the year - the way he's going anyway! I was doing laundry and when I took out the washing there was a condom in the bottome of the washer!!!!!!!! o.O o.O o.O I said to him "Guess what I found today?" his reply - as straight as an arrow "Do you still have it?!" o.O 8-| 8-| I know I shouldn't say this, but I can't wait to be a grandmothe!!! I wanted 7 children - 6 boys 1 girl! And was DEVESTATED when I had to have a hysterectomy at 35!!! :'( But I have my God children having babies left right and centre, and one of my closest girlfriends has a little boy who will be 1 next week. I LOVE him!!! I keep saying to him "Come to mom!!!" This is my friend o.O o.O ! ANYTHING he wants I get for him, even if he doesn't know he wants it! I could just eat him!!! They grow up too fast heh?
Hi Dawn-i had the strangest dream last night-i was in first year halls, and honestly made me realise how long ago it all was-BIZARRRE!!!..ITS WEIRD..I remeber the street so well, and i remeber what I was wearing the day I walked out and paniced about my future/ Its strange, as at the end of the drema the building-student halls were condemned-youd understand why , if you knew the showers moved-omG and the ringing of the bell"Its tea time:.I met my friend Roslyn their, cried over dinner-and she was the only one to take me to my room. That place,was like a prison!!!!Roslynd rang me 98 from a priory with anorexia, weighing in at 4 stone, just like my sister, youd ask her0-are you okay, are you eating ok? Just likemy sister, the "what are you on about expression, and the total denial for years". Its strange though, i ermeber thinking way back then, can I join you, ive a drink problem?
I otally get you, the naming, degrading and pigeonholing thing, I hate that too, Its just sometimes easier to understand whats going on if theri is something to read and relate to, Ie0 im not goin mad. Woke this morning with what feels like a heavy cold, but it was the same yesterday and had vanished by midday, but at nighttime, I was a sweaty mess.
Your son sounds like a wise kid, and thats healthy, and funny. "I, thats mine mum-give it back" XD
Still snorting Olbas oil-and strangley al weekend Ive been munching on curries , like no tomorrow, Honestly the line around my waist has stretched to the point I have stretch marks. I actually get cravings for currys.
OmG, his brother turned up yesterday, telling us about the birth of their daughter.God, I was in stitches, but it brought it back -that hellish pain, and all the blood, honestly iwas sitting with my legs crossed more tightly than you could imagine, and nearly threw up when he told me the pat about the placenta-oh still feel squeammish. Why is it, there are certain elemens of childbirth experiences that saty with you, and certain parts where you think wtf was going on?Yup!!!
I think woman get an unfair deal in this world, periods/childbirth/menopause/womb removal/prolapse and then possibly hot flushes then cancer. Sorry can I have a sex change please? Then again, i drather be intouch with my feminine side-Right I am rambling, maybe Im aleergic to olbas oil, , Ive been having alot of the runs, and put it down to the olbas oil and oh so dizzie.
OMG, tripped up last night, over the damn blue stool and ened eup on the bucket , I have a smacker of a bruise up my back, on my bottom, and on my boob, luckily I missed the face.
I feel huge today, big boobs, no waist , all tender. Im ean, do men suffer int his way? Well, do you know if they do? I havent got a clue?Honestly, how dare a man be bothered by a females appearance when they have that thing dangling between their legs. I remebr thinking -what is that o.O o.O
Mums friends are mad, they went to a fancie dress party, all about 60 , she was i dont know , some fishis catch, and her boyfriend the fisherman, her friend was a , suicide bomber, and someone else weht as swine flu, XD XD I was in knots, a snout and fairy wings. they have a better socail life than I do?
Ouch-dont ever rub that Olbas stuff in your eyes-its almost as bad as chilli powder. right better go, tidy , shower clean, work , home tea, work metting, home bed..Ouch , my eyes, it can be blinding! Take care Dawn
I otally get you, the naming, degrading and pigeonholing thing, I hate that too, Its just sometimes easier to understand whats going on if theri is something to read and relate to, Ie0 im not goin mad. Woke this morning with what feels like a heavy cold, but it was the same yesterday and had vanished by midday, but at nighttime, I was a sweaty mess.
Your son sounds like a wise kid, and thats healthy, and funny. "I, thats mine mum-give it back" XD
Still snorting Olbas oil-and strangley al weekend Ive been munching on curries , like no tomorrow, Honestly the line around my waist has stretched to the point I have stretch marks. I actually get cravings for currys.
OmG, his brother turned up yesterday, telling us about the birth of their daughter.God, I was in stitches, but it brought it back -that hellish pain, and all the blood, honestly iwas sitting with my legs crossed more tightly than you could imagine, and nearly threw up when he told me the pat about the placenta-oh still feel squeammish. Why is it, there are certain elemens of childbirth experiences that saty with you, and certain parts where you think wtf was going on?Yup!!!
I think woman get an unfair deal in this world, periods/childbirth/menopause/womb removal/prolapse and then possibly hot flushes then cancer. Sorry can I have a sex change please? Then again, i drather be intouch with my feminine side-Right I am rambling, maybe Im aleergic to olbas oil, , Ive been having alot of the runs, and put it down to the olbas oil and oh so dizzie.
OMG, tripped up last night, over the damn blue stool and ened eup on the bucket , I have a smacker of a bruise up my back, on my bottom, and on my boob, luckily I missed the face.
I feel huge today, big boobs, no waist , all tender. Im ean, do men suffer int his way? Well, do you know if they do? I havent got a clue?Honestly, how dare a man be bothered by a females appearance when they have that thing dangling between their legs. I remebr thinking -what is that o.O o.O
Mums friends are mad, they went to a fancie dress party, all about 60 , she was i dont know , some fishis catch, and her boyfriend the fisherman, her friend was a , suicide bomber, and someone else weht as swine flu, XD XD I was in knots, a snout and fairy wings. they have a better socail life than I do?
Ouch-dont ever rub that Olbas stuff in your eyes-its almost as bad as chilli powder. right better go, tidy , shower clean, work , home tea, work metting, home bed..Ouch , my eyes, it can be blinding! Take care Dawn
I cant believe today o.O Walking to my work, off the bus-could hardly walk, started to sweat, got up the stairs everything started to spin to the point wherer I started to shake, I threw myslef against a surface and sook, and then pins and needles trembling and crying and couldnt get breath. Woman found me, asked if I needed help, man pulled seat acrooss towards me and started to ask questions, byt this time I was sitiin down and calming the trembles, Then Boss came and got me, I calm down and carry on with the day.
Then during work i ask a customer"Would you like me to help you to try that on?" :$ XD OMG-then got found hysterically laughing to myself about what Id just asked :$
Totally stuffed up today, cant believe but lady was about to phone for a paramedic, Im like no its nothing I do this all the time. Just a wreck, I now have to go back out tonight and dreading just every footstep, anyway, better go
Then during work i ask a customer"Would you like me to help you to try that on?" :$ XD OMG-then got found hysterically laughing to myself about what Id just asked :$
Totally stuffed up today, cant believe but lady was about to phone for a paramedic, Im like no its nothing I do this all the time. Just a wreck, I now have to go back out tonight and dreading just every footstep, anyway, better go
Just looked up this Olbas Oil and its contents here are possible allergic reactions to each oil!
Peppermint oil appears to be safe for most adults when used in small doses. Possible side effects include allergic reactions and heartburn.
Cajeput oil can possibly cause skin inflammation. Avoid using on the facial area
Both the leaf and oil have the potential to cause contact allergies in some individuals. Wintergreen should not be used by those who are sensitive or allergic to aspirin or similar substances. Individuals with tinnitus that is chronic or severe should not use wintergreen.
The others and these are all from different plants! SO if you are allergic to certain plants, then you will have a reaction to the oils! The only way of finding out is to have an allergy test!
Waking up stuffy and feeling bloated and itchy and dizzy etc, IS NOT Anxiety related Katy! I don't know what else to tell you about getting tested and seeing what you are allergic too!!!!!!! :(
Don't you think for one moment Katy that ALL your symptoms are ALLERGY related in some way? And once again you have some more bruising!!!!!!!! Since I started talking to you, you keep mentioning tripping over a bucket!!! Did you remember tripping over the bucket? I am SO concerned about your health Katy! There HAS to be reasons why you are in such a physical state! Do you also know that some Allergies make you crave certain foods!!!!? BUT who doesn't love a curry!
When you reply to me you never mention or reply about Allergies! Why is that? When you went to the doctor, you didn't mention it to him! etc. Can you honestly say that the only thing you are allergic too is Potatos?!!!!! I get SO upset thinking that you could feel 100% better, if you only took the steps to have your doctor find out why you feel this way! It's a simple test, takes 1 hour and could answer ALL your concerns! IF you had a terrible disease - knock on wood - and someone said "If you take this test and these drugs after, you will feel like a new person" would you do that? I REALLY want you to STOP thinking that you are wasting his time - and you actually end up wasting his time, because you DON'T tell him what you were supposed to tell him!!!!! I want you to write EVERYTHING down, including the "tripping" and take that paper too him! Or like I stated, I can send you a post with everything I think you should have checked and then you can take it too him! I can't tell you how IMPORTANT I think this is for your future!
Have you called the housing place? Ask them if you get a doctors note saying the stress you are under living in these conditions could help you move up the list!!!? Did you find out why they returned it?
I can only tell you what I think you should do Katy! If you choose to ignore it, then you will continue to feel like c**p! I'm VERY upset about that thought! But I can only take a horse to water, I can't make her drink!!!!
I have one hell of a headache today - neck muscles - must have slept funny! so I will talk to you later!
Peppermint oil appears to be safe for most adults when used in small doses. Possible side effects include allergic reactions and heartburn.
Cajeput oil can possibly cause skin inflammation. Avoid using on the facial area
Both the leaf and oil have the potential to cause contact allergies in some individuals. Wintergreen should not be used by those who are sensitive or allergic to aspirin or similar substances. Individuals with tinnitus that is chronic or severe should not use wintergreen.
The others and these are all from different plants! SO if you are allergic to certain plants, then you will have a reaction to the oils! The only way of finding out is to have an allergy test!
Waking up stuffy and feeling bloated and itchy and dizzy etc, IS NOT Anxiety related Katy! I don't know what else to tell you about getting tested and seeing what you are allergic too!!!!!!! :(
Don't you think for one moment Katy that ALL your symptoms are ALLERGY related in some way? And once again you have some more bruising!!!!!!!! Since I started talking to you, you keep mentioning tripping over a bucket!!! Did you remember tripping over the bucket? I am SO concerned about your health Katy! There HAS to be reasons why you are in such a physical state! Do you also know that some Allergies make you crave certain foods!!!!? BUT who doesn't love a curry!
When you reply to me you never mention or reply about Allergies! Why is that? When you went to the doctor, you didn't mention it to him! etc. Can you honestly say that the only thing you are allergic too is Potatos?!!!!! I get SO upset thinking that you could feel 100% better, if you only took the steps to have your doctor find out why you feel this way! It's a simple test, takes 1 hour and could answer ALL your concerns! IF you had a terrible disease - knock on wood - and someone said "If you take this test and these drugs after, you will feel like a new person" would you do that? I REALLY want you to STOP thinking that you are wasting his time - and you actually end up wasting his time, because you DON'T tell him what you were supposed to tell him!!!!! I want you to write EVERYTHING down, including the "tripping" and take that paper too him! Or like I stated, I can send you a post with everything I think you should have checked and then you can take it too him! I can't tell you how IMPORTANT I think this is for your future!
Have you called the housing place? Ask them if you get a doctors note saying the stress you are under living in these conditions could help you move up the list!!!? Did you find out why they returned it?
I can only tell you what I think you should do Katy! If you choose to ignore it, then you will continue to feel like c**p! I'm VERY upset about that thought! But I can only take a horse to water, I can't make her drink!!!!
I have one hell of a headache today - neck muscles - must have slept funny! so I will talk to you later!
Hi Dawn- I hope your head is healing_ I cant imagine how insecure it must feel! My sinuses are bad, and if this continues, yes I shall seek some medical attention-I just dont feel its bad enough though, so want seek help until I faint.
I also think its all linked to my menstrual cycle, everytime, my panic increases, I get my you know whats o.O Almost like my body is to knackered to work its usual ways.
I fell over twice, once onsaturady, and once on friday, I just keep missjudging things, but I thinkits anxiety related. Whatever is going on, its intensifying my allready pain. before i went off on one today I was thinking about rosalynd, and loads of things and then adding the equation up in my head , like a mathematical sum. It made sense, but as soon as I stood up, I could tell there was something wrong, its almost as though I aint getting in oxygen. The harder I try, the harder it gets. i try the tummy breathing in techniquies, but everything feels clogged. Today, when that woman caught me, half of me wanted to just fain tit out, the othe half of me was sweat it out for the girls.
My mum bless her, babydat, and seemed in a really bad mood when she left. Shes definately changing, Pernickity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11God, if thats hormones Id rather die- no offence, but shes just not grasped onto any of it. it was allright for her to have an affair, when I was Beccas age i remebr the knife throwing and the vases breaking, In fact I dont truly have a happy memory of my mum and dad togethre. i didnt want my dad to leave though, he understood me and protected me, my mum always seemsed to HATE ME-though I know now she does seem to love me. So confuse, but part of my problem in fact most of my problem stems from my relationship with her.Okay, I need bed, not feeling welll , like you , itruly hope your head gets bett, I feel sad as I feel inferior , but I know I have a brain cell somewhere. Anyway, got to go, sinus trouble, and belly period pain, so balck eyed and tired. ill sort this out , soon. Deep down, I am so insecure i think he has a hold on me.
I also think its all linked to my menstrual cycle, everytime, my panic increases, I get my you know whats o.O Almost like my body is to knackered to work its usual ways.
I fell over twice, once onsaturady, and once on friday, I just keep missjudging things, but I thinkits anxiety related. Whatever is going on, its intensifying my allready pain. before i went off on one today I was thinking about rosalynd, and loads of things and then adding the equation up in my head , like a mathematical sum. It made sense, but as soon as I stood up, I could tell there was something wrong, its almost as though I aint getting in oxygen. The harder I try, the harder it gets. i try the tummy breathing in techniquies, but everything feels clogged. Today, when that woman caught me, half of me wanted to just fain tit out, the othe half of me was sweat it out for the girls.
My mum bless her, babydat, and seemed in a really bad mood when she left. Shes definately changing, Pernickity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11God, if thats hormones Id rather die- no offence, but shes just not grasped onto any of it. it was allright for her to have an affair, when I was Beccas age i remebr the knife throwing and the vases breaking, In fact I dont truly have a happy memory of my mum and dad togethre. i didnt want my dad to leave though, he understood me and protected me, my mum always seemsed to HATE ME-though I know now she does seem to love me. So confuse, but part of my problem in fact most of my problem stems from my relationship with her.Okay, I need bed, not feeling welll , like you , itruly hope your head gets bett, I feel sad as I feel inferior , but I know I have a brain cell somewhere. Anyway, got to go, sinus trouble, and belly period pain, so balck eyed and tired. ill sort this out , soon. Deep down, I am so insecure i think he has a hold on me.
My dad and i were talking the other day about my mom!!! I never knew she had Post Partum Depression!! o.O We talked about ALL the terrible things she did and said and how truly violent she was to me especially! I thank God we fixed that all before she died!! :'( It was really hard to come to terms with the fact that my mom was SO unhappy and psycotic!! I just know that this will NEVER happen with myself and my boys! And it hasn't! My eldest is 17 and my youngest is 14 and neither of them have NEVER heard things like "I HATE YOU!!!!" "I WISH YOU WERE DEAD!" "I WISH YOU HAD DIED AT BIRTH!" "I'VE NEVER LOVED YOU!" "YOU'RE UGY AND FAT AND A TOTAL EMBARASSMENT TO OUR FAMILY!" Who in their right mind would tell their own child these things? But now I find out she wasn't in her right mind! So I can forgive her for it!
When your estrogen increases you can get more symptoms - such as panic attacks and irritability aka PMS! But that doesn't explain everything else! You HAVE fainted, and still don't get help!!!! And from what you tell me Katy - I'm pretty usre it's "Bad Enough!" But my head hurts too much to bang it against a wall!!!! 8-|
Of course he has a hold on you, he TOTALLY knows what buttons to push and what opportunity to take! You didn't mention about the housing!? Are you avoiding the question? What about the doctors?
When your estrogen increases you can get more symptoms - such as panic attacks and irritability aka PMS! But that doesn't explain everything else! You HAVE fainted, and still don't get help!!!! And from what you tell me Katy - I'm pretty usre it's "Bad Enough!" But my head hurts too much to bang it against a wall!!!! 8-|
Of course he has a hold on you, he TOTALLY knows what buttons to push and what opportunity to take! You didn't mention about the housing!? Are you avoiding the question? What about the doctors?