Virginity? Emotional Wreck

Hi 

I don't know how to say this in a way that won't make me seem like a bit of a s***, but here goes. I lost my virginity two days ago while on a grad trip in the bahamas. I'd met the boy on the trip and he was a lot of fun, really nice and cute. I obviously didn't think we would end up having a relationship or anything, and I was realistic about my expectations of what would come out of it, so why am I so surprised and hurt?

The first night i met him, we were at a club and we started talking. Somehow (i don't rememebr much) we ended up walking to his room. We got there and even though he wanted to have sex, I refused and told him that I couldn't because i was a virgin and I didn't want my first time to be a drunk one night stand. He didn't pressure me and we just kept doing what we were doing before. I left his room really early the next morning (maybe 4 am) and I was excited about what had happened and my confidence was wayy up (he was really good looking and he kept telling me i was beautiful). All during the day though, every time i saw him he would turn away. 

That night we met again, danced a little, drank a lot, and ended up in his room again. For those of you who are going to ask, yes i am legal. We just got carried away this time and I couldn't (or didn't want to, at the time) stop it. We had sex. It hurt a lot  and after a while i asked him to stop and he did. Next day once again the same thing happened - he just ignored me. 

for the next three nights, I saw him in the club and he told me to come to his room at three in the morning. He even gave me his room key. The first two nights, he wasnt there (maybe with other girls, I'm not sure). The third night I was outside his room and two girls came out of the elevator and said "if he (they said his name) isn't here in twenty minutes, we're leaving". So obviously he had more then just me on his agenda. I left right away and I was really upset that night. 

The next day was our last and i was determined to make it good, so once again we went to the club. He was there and we danced and talked and drank until we decided to go to my room. Again we had sex, and again we had to stop because it hurt too much. He wasnt as good about it this time though. instead of saying it was ok and staying with me he got up and said he wanted to go back to the club. So he left me there alone and I was a total wreck. I was bleeding down there and crying and it was pretty awful for a while. The next day when we were leaving somebody called out after me "Number 3", and then a girl told me I was his third hookup of the trip. 

I really don't know what to think. Every time i hear certain songs i have panic attacks and i've been crying all the time. I knew we wouldn't end up dating, and i knew he probably didn't like me (how could he, we've only known each other for a week) but I thought I meant something more than just a number, and I expected respect. 

I dont know what to do to feel better. if anybody has any ideas let me know. I cant talk to my friends or family about it because they know him and my friends just keep telling me it isn't a big deal, but it is to me. 

Sorry for such a long post. 

Thanks lot, 

Confused