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Iam 25yrs old gal. i was in relationship with a guy since 2007 till 2010. that was a internet based relationship. we met many times and hanged out. we both loved each other and his family knew about our relationship and they were all okay with it. it was almost sure that we would be getting married in future. so we tried getting intimate and i lost my virginity to him(hymen rupture). but we dint have sex, only we tried to have and in that i lost my virginity. after that whenevr we met we did lovemaking of all sort but dint have sex.he told me about masturbation also and i used to masturbate 5-6 times a month(never used any object for it,only clitoris stimulation). now that he cheated me,so we brokeup. but iam worried about my marriage when at first night there will be no bleeding cos hymen is already ruputured and in no way i can tell it to my husband that i was in any relationship. iam here to get counselled and to get some positive response. kindly help me with this problem and some alternate reason for hymen rupture other than sex so that my life after marriage is okay! i know i have done wrong but it was not meant to be like that. please help. i know iam not virgin but still i want some positive and true response. am i still too tight for my future husband so that he wont be able to know about my lost virginity.????

Hi there,

I am a 24 years girl and I lost my virginity *technically* due to medical incident.

I went to health check and tried to have a pap smear while I was not sexually active. I do not meant to give you a "reason" to cover your condition from your future husband.

But being in the same condition with you for no longer having hymen in tact (no longer virgin, technically without having sex). I still believe the best is to tell the truth, up front.

I believe if a guy is in love with you, they will accept your background and the way you are.

It's the honesty that counts.

Hope my comments give a different point of view to your problem.

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thanks for the reply dear...i agree with you that truth counts but with its not possible yaar! it kills me everyday but i dont have any option but to llie about it....

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You had a three year relationship. The only person who is at fault for doing anything wrong is the guy who cheated on you. If you feel that you did something wrong according to your religious beliefs then that is something you will have to work through between yourself and your God.

As far as your future husband goes, telling the truth is the best option. Saying you do not have a sexual history when you actually do is not going to help anyone. You say the guy in your last relationship cheated on you, were you tested for STDs and STIs after you found out? If you weren't, you should be. Being open and honest about your sexual history with your partner is highly important. They have the right to know if they are at risk for any kind of infection or otherwise.

 

You don't have to go into great detail about it with him until you feel comfortable doing so, but if you think that he is going to freak out because you had sex previously in a committed relationship, then you need to tell him sooner rather than later. A frank sit down with him telling him, "Hey, I feel like you need to know this, because I want to keep us both healthy and happy." should be sufficient.

 

Ask yourself this. Do you think he would be more furious if you told him that you had a sexual background before things get serious to the point of marriage, or after you've been wed for a year or two and he finds out that he wasn't your first?

 

A man who loves you is going to understand these things. That a committed, three year relationship isn't anywhere near the same thing as a one night stand. That the guy you were with was an absolute douchebag because he took advantage of your love for him by cheating on you. Set the standard for honesty. Honesty the last guy didn't give you.

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You are still a virgin if you dont have a hymen if you haven't had sex...don't be daft.
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not having sex from past 4 yrs can be of any help
as i m getting married after 2 months
and i had sex with my boyfriend
but from past 4 yrs i didnt had any relation with him
plzzzz telll me will my husband come to know about my virginity
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You say you lost your virginity (ruptured your hymen) but have not actually had sex do you mean he fingered you and that's how you lost it and if never put his penis inside your vagina?
If you have never actually had a penis inside your vagina then you are technically still a virgin even though your hymen was ruptured
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You need to tell your husband. Like all of those other replies are saying. The truth will find it's way out and that can cause more hurt the just the truth upfront. Tell him it was a mistake and you've never actually had sex with anybody, tell him the whole story that you just explained here! If he doesn't want to be with you after that, then he is not the one.
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I had lost my vetginity..I had sex the guy in one year ago...I want to get Intimate again...so I want to pain like fast time..plzz help me plz...I want that my husband will not know that I m not a virgir girl..I m 17 year old...plzz help me
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husband may knw
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I lost my virginity and want to get it back. I want to tighten my vagina because I'm worried about my first night. What do you suggest?
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