Fluctuating mental state, often unable to be myself or speak clearly

Vyoma, Do you really think this is Bipolar Disorder? I feel like my symptoms are pretty similar to Brian's but it doesn't sound like he has huge swings in activity level, mood or energy levels. I know I don't have those swings at all. It's just like my brain is foggy most of the time and it is just being dulled by something. I also have the enunciating/articulating problem he has except like I said above maybe once or twice a year everything is fine. I can speak clearly, hold on a conversation with someone and my mind is clear and sharp.

Hey guys,

Wow I havent been on here in ages - 3-4 years??  Sorry for a lack of replying - this was going to my old gmail acocunt which I hardly ever log into.

So where I'm at now:

After carrying on in the same predicament for another year or so after posting the original message I finally resorted to going to see a Psychiatrist.  I went with a fairly high level of sceptisism as I felt like I'd tried everything else and there could never be a magic bullet.  So I was more suprised than anyone when thats pretty much exactly what he prescribed.  He put me on Lovan and Epplilim (Lovan for anxiety and the Epplilim is apparently used to treat Epiliepsy but also helps with long term mood swings).  Within under two weeks I felt myself started to come right and since then its been amazing.  I'm pretty much back to myself.  I still have the sensation from time to time but its not nearly as intense and doesnt last for nearly as long - usually a couple of days max rather than a few weeks like before.

After a while the Lovan didnt seem to be doing the job and we up'd the dose and after about 2 years it didnt seem to be working as well so we switched to Pristique.  I initially had the same issue with that where it would work for a year or so and then not so well, at which point we'd up the dose.  I'm now on 100mg Pristique a day which my Psychiatrist tells me isnt a crazy amount, and it seems to have levelled out - we havent changed the prescriptioon in over 1.5yrs I think so fingers crossed it stays there.

If I had the option I'd obviously rather not have to take anything.  But given the choice of taking some tablets every day and having my life back, or not taking them and living a life of despair, frustration and depression... theres no contest.  The drugs dont make me feel 'high' or unnaturally happy.  If something goes wrong in my life I respond accordingly - ie feel sad, angry, whatever.  The drugs dont make me behave unnaturally - they just put me back on an even keel.

By the sounds of it I was extremely lucky to find a solution so quickly - apparently it can take a lot of experimentation to find the right Psych for one, and then the right combo and dosage of drugs.  But for me it certainly worked and I'd recommend it highly.

All the best Jerry and everyone else going through these feelings, I really hope this helps.

i do also suffer with the same symptoms ,always leaving in dream

I believe I have figured it out. It happened to me today. I believe I figured out exactly what my existance is. I believe that everything is made up of tiny "moments". I believe that I have actually thought in my mind and figured out which exact sounds, image or whatever it is we are made up of. I know I sound crazy. I get it in my mind because of the fact that I have thought about. I do not believe there is any possible way to explain this feeling.

All I see is the same image constantly in my mind no matter what I do or think about. It's always there..

I am a 20 year old male .bsc- biotech student. I stills does not speak clearly.so what i do please give solution.

I too am suffering from brain imbalance, I don't have the energy to talk at all, when i do
I get way ahead of myself
the information that I am trying to put out,is all over the place, I hurry through it. I just want it all out in one word
It takes too much energy and is a real effort

seems i too got a solution

Of corse I have...My name SIJU working as Researcher In Disaster Mangement.........India

Its really confusing because my symptoms are associated with so many other nuerological problems that have nothing to do with me. During conversation my brain will go blank and i cant find the words to express myself or when people say stuff to me i may respond awkwardly because my brain just hasn't seemed to have processed it even though i know i have been through the situation a thousand times before or I probably can find the appropriate response just after the conversation when i actually needed it. I cant just say stuff there and then. I then get anxious and panic a little because i hate awkward moments like that where i cant find the right response. Generally, I'm pretty articulate but when my mind just shuts off like that it makes me look like a socially inept person. Some say it gets better over time and who knows maybe it will. 

hi! I have been feeling the same way ...I have always known to be a little scatterbrained but I feel lately that I have been in a mental fog, you descibed it so clearly. When you feel good, your sociable, loving life, everything feels fine and right with yourself, and than all of a sudden something comes over you and you have a hard time socializing or in my case, just doing easy day to day things is difficult.

Were you able yo acquire any help on the matter? I was thinking of seeing a psychiatrist, I am tired of these ups and downs, but lately mostly downs....

Thanks

All of you please try to avoid caffeine and sugar. It may help. I am not a doctor or anything, but did some online research.

when you find the cure let me know because it is just the same dam thing for me.

yup i know exactly what you mean. however maybe we need to talk little :) maybe many speak so fast with so many words because of being so unstable in their mind so they had to learn to speak fast and well. maybe they are anxious or shameless? who knows but yes id love to speak well when i do speak a few words .

Wonderful post ! This post just nailed it .. i mean i cant tell you how this matches my personality. Would you say people of this nature develop this condition as a result of a gap between how they seem view themselves , something they arrive at as a result of past achievements vs how they are at the moment ? I say that because i was good academically and had high hopes of myself after school but got derailed in college due to drugs and video-games also the fact that i chose college over the course that i wanted to do due to which i suffered big time. I failed in college went into depression for a year and then managed to pull myself out of it by enrolling in a postgraduate course . I have been depressed ever since and have not been able to get over the past and regret having made certain choices. I had a steady GF who got married since i couldnt commit to her because i wasnt doing as well people who decide to get married. That was another setback infact the most terrible setback. It has just goone downhill ever since....

I have the exact same condition as described by the OP and am looking for ways to get my life back in order. Im a software engineer and am far behind my peers / friends. I feel highly complexed while speaking to them on the telephone and often cannot articulate myself clearly due to which . I feel dumbed down & unintelligent most of the times , My attention span is horrible , i cant focus on something for too long. I have headaches when i wake up in the morning I have zero tolerance for any sort of intoxication now . 1 beer gives me a headache that last 2 days . I have mild dyslexia and spend an awful amount of time reading the newspaper trying to understand articles . While watching movies and sitcoms i have to rewind parts that found difficult to comprehend due to the complexity of the sentence and sometimes have to watch/ hear it several times before i get the gist of it . I have some social anxiety as well because im not not sure what i want to say will be what i eventually end up saying. Its a horrible feeling to live with is all i can tell you.

I contemplate suicide every single day but i know i cannot do it since i lost my sister 2 years ago and i need to live on for my parents, I would really appreciate if someone could tell me how to cope with reality on a day to day basis since im sure we all have coping strategies to deal with our condition. We are all in the same boat and need to help one another.