My boyfriend and I've known each other for a little more than two years. He had told me times to times that it's good not to trust anybody. I have the opposite opinion about his statement. I belief we need to treat people with respect, and give them the trust that they deserve. I also believe people lie because they afraid of punishment. Often maybe they feel if they don't lie that they might hurt others, and loose their love one. Most of it I strongly belief that people lie because they have insecurity issue.
I love my boyfriend unconditionally. I have never questions his freedom. I know he is a good man. He is very ambitious, and intelligent. he works super hard. He is a high achiever, and highly competitive person. There are so many good quality in him as a person, but I find it very to difficult to work as a good partner when he gets paranoid. When he told me not to trust anybody, that is including me. We have more good times together, but what he easily wants to focus often time on the negative event which doesn't even exist. He accused me of cheating on him, just because at one or two times in the past that I did not response to his call or text messaging. There were times I have trouble with reception, and cell phone technical issues. I almost feel like he finds excuse not to love me by doing that. He gets absolutely very distance when he beliefs his feeling. It hurts me when I see that. Not sure what to do to convince him that his suspicions is not true. He gets more certain about his feeling when I do not response to his statement, or he is certain that was happening when I response to his statement. He thinks I am just trying to defend myself. He will bring this up again, and again, even though the time has long passed. He will never go to any counselor.
I love my boyfriend unconditionally. I have never questions his freedom. I know he is a good man. He is very ambitious, and intelligent. he works super hard. He is a high achiever, and highly competitive person. There are so many good quality in him as a person, but I find it very to difficult to work as a good partner when he gets paranoid. When he told me not to trust anybody, that is including me. We have more good times together, but what he easily wants to focus often time on the negative event which doesn't even exist. He accused me of cheating on him, just because at one or two times in the past that I did not response to his call or text messaging. There were times I have trouble with reception, and cell phone technical issues. I almost feel like he finds excuse not to love me by doing that. He gets absolutely very distance when he beliefs his feeling. It hurts me when I see that. Not sure what to do to convince him that his suspicions is not true. He gets more certain about his feeling when I do not response to his statement, or he is certain that was happening when I response to his statement. He thinks I am just trying to defend myself. He will bring this up again, and again, even though the time has long passed. He will never go to any counselor.
He sounds insecure with himself. If he wont go, you go, do this for yourself, get some help dealing with it
Think about it, do you want to live with that for the rest of your life? It will most likely only get worse. Being accused of things you're not doing, by your spouse, gets old after a while.