In July 2006 I drove to Illinois to get an abortion. I hadn't taken a pregnancy test but had known for about two weeks that I was definatly pregnant. Never been pregnant before but could tell my stomach was changing. I had no doubt in my mind that abortion was the right decision. I was scared to have a baby even though I had been with my boyfriend for 5 years and knew he would be an amazing father. He was supportive of my decision. I found out at the abortion center that I was to far along to go through with it.
Now two years later, my BEAUTIFUL baby girl is about to have her brithday and I am still haunted everyday with the thought that I tried to get rid of her. I can't imagine my life without her now but I feel horrible everytime I think about the fact that I tried to kill her.
I want to get past this but the only person that knows that this was in my head and that I tried to do this is my boyfriend. (We are still together of course) I feel guilty even though I wasn't able to go through with it.
Anybody going through this????
Now two years later, my BEAUTIFUL baby girl is about to have her brithday and I am still haunted everyday with the thought that I tried to get rid of her. I can't imagine my life without her now but I feel horrible everytime I think about the fact that I tried to kill her.
I want to get past this but the only person that knows that this was in my head and that I tried to do this is my boyfriend. (We are still together of course) I feel guilty even though I wasn't able to go through with it.
Anybody going through this????
I had the same feelings 18 years ago and today my son is alive and well.
Every once in a while i think back to the stuff that was going on in my head and i just thank God that i didn't do it.
But the key to this whole this is, i didn't do it, and neither did you.
You got pretty close tho, if the clinic went ahead with your request, you would never had felt the joy and experienced the love from this baby girl.
The day my son was placed in my arms after giving birth to him, i looked into his beautiful little face and wondered how could i have even thought about it.
Today he is a strapping 190 lb. quarter back for his football team. He is attending Culinary School to become a Chef and the girls just love him. How could i have thought to rob the world of such a talent.
Just look at her, hold her and love her. Don't dwell on the what ifs. The clinic made the right decision for you and i know that you are thankful for that.
All that "stuff" just makes you love her even more if that's possible.
When my son hugs me, which by the way feels like a big bear around me, for just a fleeting second i think back to those days, but those days are long gone forever and he is here and wonderful.
Every once in a while i think back to the stuff that was going on in my head and i just thank God that i didn't do it.
But the key to this whole this is, i didn't do it, and neither did you.
You got pretty close tho, if the clinic went ahead with your request, you would never had felt the joy and experienced the love from this baby girl.
The day my son was placed in my arms after giving birth to him, i looked into his beautiful little face and wondered how could i have even thought about it.
Today he is a strapping 190 lb. quarter back for his football team. He is attending Culinary School to become a Chef and the girls just love him. How could i have thought to rob the world of such a talent.
Just look at her, hold her and love her. Don't dwell on the what ifs. The clinic made the right decision for you and i know that you are thankful for that.
All that "stuff" just makes you love her even more if that's possible.
When my son hugs me, which by the way feels like a big bear around me, for just a fleeting second i think back to those days, but those days are long gone forever and he is here and wonderful.