Hi! Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years and we still couldn't have sex, because it cause so much pain that we had to stop it all the times. It hurts so much that I began to cry.
I'm a virgin and before we tried it, I didn't try to insert anything into me. When we tried for the first time and couldn't have sex and he couldn't even put 1 finger to me, I tried to loosen my vagina. It was hard, at first I tried with 1 finger, and when it went easy, I tried 2 finger. Then I bought an about 1,13 inch wide dildo (it was the thinnest where I bought it and I thought it would go easy after I could insert 2 fingers) and tried to insert it to me with libricant. After many attempts I couldn't do it (I still don't understand because my 2 fingers are almost at the same size). After I gave it up with the dildo, my boyfriend tried to finger me. He could hardly insert 2 fingers, now it goes easily, but he still can't penetrate me. When he try to pull apart his fingers it hits something at the entrance of my vagina. I tried to exam my vagina what can cause the problem and I see a membranous thing in a ring shape at the entrance of my vagina (maybe the hymen?) that can't loosen more when I try to put in more than 2 fingers. When my boyfriend try to penetrate very hard he can't even put his penis to my vagina.
I made an appointment to the gynecologist to July, but it's far away, and I don't want to wait until then, I would be happy if we can solve it together before that. At first I thought it's vaginismus, but if I have vaginismus, my boyfriend couldn't insert in 2 fingers I think. I always have orgasm so I don't think the lack of foreplay would be the problem. I also tried to drink alcohol before it so I was very relaxed then, but it didn't solve the problem. We discussed that we should try again and I should endure the pain and push it to me even if I cry, but I'm afraid it will cause serious physical harm.