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I'm 27 and my other half is 33, we have been together for almost two years, living together for a year and a half. For the past few months the overwhelming urge to have a baby. I can't explain it properly, it's an urge I just can't shake off. We both work full time and have so discussed children and he has said he would like to wait another three years. I know that is a viable request but what if I wait three years then he says lets wait another three, plus there is no guarantee that I would get pregnant straight away. I just don't want to wait. Bringing this up for discussion with him is off the cards as it would only lead to an arguement since he's not telling me what I want to hear. I personally see no reason to wait, if you have found the person you want to be with for the rest of your life and children are what you want to have then why wait? I just need to find some way of suppressing these feelings. Friends of ours have just had a baby and it breaks my heart seeing their pictures and updates on facebook, I het so jealous when I see women younger than me with more than one baby and a girl from work has just announced she is pregnant, it took all I had not to cry I front of her. If anyone has any suggestions they would be gratefully appreciated

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A mans perspective.

It is well known to 'us blokes' that when women reach a certain age somewhere between 25 and 35 many - not all but a large percentage of women become extremely broody. This can happen suddenly and sometimes VERY suddenly. We are sometimes told that we getting married and having kids 'or else'. We often find that our requests don't really come into it at that stage. Sometimes the whole thing can seem a bit irrational. Sometimes it seems if we don't really have the will or the finances to have children there is always the risk of a partner saying 'you are out on your ear sunshine'! This has not happened to me personally but I've known two young men with partners who were hopelessly smitten with them but the partners left quite quickly because the men did not want kids within a specific time frame i.e. 1-2 years. One of those ladies is now married to a businessman and she has 2 children so i supposed things worked out for her. I suppose that's the way it has always been though. Ladies tend to want children while the blokes tend to be reasonably indifferent and sort of have to go along with it. The only difference nowadays is the ladies have facebook to look at each others baby photos which tends to stir things up a bit - and the men have facebook to arrange trips to a bar in order to talk about something else!

That's a highly generalized, slightly humorous but not entirely ridiculous take on it.

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I'll never forget my first pregnancy and taking my test on the toilet and waiting to see what it said with my husband beside me, whom by the way said he never wanted to have a wife or children. Well, guess what? The stick said positive. My husband sat on the couch for 4 hours with the look of stunned awe (?) shock (?) on his face and literally did not say one word that whole time, I don't remember what he first said when he did say something. 6 weeks later the inevitable happened and I had a miscarriage, he was heartbroken actually more than I was but it made him realize how much he DID want children and wanted to try as soon as I was healthy and was given the go-ahead again. 3 months later I was pregnant with our daughter who is almost 3, she is a blessing but I did have her when I was 35 years old myself and I have since had a hysterectomy so will only have her but she is my angel and love her dearly. The moral is, it is never too late, give him his space but also let him know you can't wait forever yourself and you don't know if 3 years is doable for yourself but half that time is, what about a compromise? Something like that anyways, ,most guys don't realize that it doesn't or might not happen right away and that you might need 'help', ask him what his reasons are for waiting get him thinking as well. Anyways, a female perspective as well. Good luck and hope this helps
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