There is a time in everyone's life that they need to make a decision. Should I go to class or should I keep watching this funny tv show or playing this computer game. Weed makes you choose what is good for you RIGHT NOW, not necessarily what is good for you in the long run. I speak of my own personal experience, weed amplifies what you are feeling and if that feeling takes power over your goals and wishes for the way your life will be, you will end up 30 years old and want something more but it is too late. You can't go back to college and meet a nice girl and enjoy your youth. All you have is a one day memory. The same memory of the same day smoking and working a sh*t job and playing video games and watching tv and eating unhealthy and living sleep deprived. It lasted 10 years, but it feels like one day because you never actually did anything. STOP SMOKING WEED RIGHT NOW IF YOU ARE HEADED DOWN THE WRONG PATH. If I could write myself a letter right now to the me i was 10 years ago, it would be Do your homework, ask out that girl that you liked because if you wait too long she will leave you and finally, know that the life you are living right now is the real thing. The life you are living isn't the real life you say, like your life is going to start one day, one day you are going to care, no. It is happening right now and everyday you say that and not actually do it is a day that you will regret. Find whatever you need to find in your heart that compels you to stop dreaming and start doing.
Just chill er body freaks. In high school I always bugged out and paniced. Just know it's a panic and you won't die. Mary Jane helps me relax and get my stress out. Just chill doooods
If there is such a thing as 'depersonnalization' I have to wonder if it is at all like the kind of experience I have had that absolutely cannot be described. I mean, if we're talking some existential loss of self, I've had that long before I started smoking weed. But I had one horrific trip, sitting in front of mirror, where my sense of self was not simply 'lost' or 'ambiguous' but there was no more "I" to feel lost from. This doesn't sound particularly horrifying, but I can garauntee that, had it lasted more than the minute or so it happened for, I would have had to kill myself. Out of, mostly, sheer terror. Now it happens almost on demand. I do wish I could explain the experience better, it comes out like the biggest melodramatic piece of c**p...but I had a different reason for starting to explain this anyhow. I don't beleive in any superstitious "drugs are an expansion into other realms" or anything, but I am left with no other explanation of my own experience other than to say that weed has expanded my mind. Albeit, it has disintegrated my sense of self in the process, if not for weed, I would still be trying to dismantle myself without the catalyst of its chemicals. Now I have what can only be described as an absolute dependancy on weed, but before that it was a more emo-style dependancy on the addrenaline rush of a knife...What I'm trying to say is, it is tempting to blame our problems on the drugs we drown ourselves in- but the problem is not the drug, it is whatever problem we are using the drug to escape from. My problem happens to be my experience of my self.
If there is such a thing as 'depersonnalization' I have to wonder if it is at all like the kind of experience I have had that absolutely cannot be described. I mean, if we're talking some existential loss of self, I've had that long before I started smoking weed. But I had one horrific trip, sitting in front of mirror, where my sense of self was not simply 'lost' or 'ambiguous' but there was no more "I" to feel lost from. This doesn't sound particularly horrifying, but I can garauntee that, had it lasted more than the minute or so it happened for, I would have had to kill myself. Out of, mostly, sheer terror. Now whatever that trip triggered in my head happens almost on demand. I do wish I could explain the experience better, it comes out like the biggest melodramatic piece of c**p...but I had a different reason for starting to explain this anyhow. I don't beleive in any superstitious "drugs are an expansion into other realms" or anything, but I am left with no other explanation of my own experience other than to say that weed has expanded my mind. Albeit, it has disintegrated my sense of self in the process, if not for weed, I would still be trying to dismantle myself without the catalyst of its chemicals. Because, though I might have killed myself if the experience lasted much longer, I was already in an almost permenant state of nauseating self-hatred in which death was the only way out. Now I have what can only be described as an absolute dependancy on weed, but before that it was a more emo-style dependancy on the addrenaline rush of a knife...What I'm trying to say is, though it is tempting to blame our problems on the drugs we drown them in- the problem is not the drug, it is whatever problem we are using the drug to escape from. My problem happens to be my experience of my self.
That being said, the terror I have interjected into weed is quite easily overcome by the concious reminder that it is not actually a terror of anything that threatens me. Weed may be an escape, but so is everything else. This one happens burns my lungs a bit, but damn is it lovely to be high.
That being said, the terror I have interjected into weed is quite easily overcome by the concious reminder that it is not actually a terror of anything that threatens me. Weed may be an escape, but so is everything else. This one happens burns my lungs a bit, but damn is it lovely to be high.
Um so, read over my message..it came accross a little intense. I'm not actually a suicidal emo kid at the moment lol, that was kind of a condensed version of the history of my mentally unstable life. Please no, "go get help" or "Jesus will save you" messages!
Much obliged =)
Much obliged =)
Well! I have been reading these sort of threads - concerning drug induced anxiety and paranioa - for the past two years, and this the first time I have replied to one of them.
My story: I had a very rough time during the second half of 07'. I don't want to go into too much detail but I had been smoking alot of weed during the two years preceeding this date before I got into heavier drugs (LSD, E's, Meth). This substance abuse coupled with a traumatic life experience left me pretty screwed up, mentally. All the symptons mentioned in this thread I had. I was deeply confused, and riddled with fear. My experiences when high were soo scary, and when I wasn't high I was a stay-at-home introvert finding it ridiculously hard to socialise and feeling paralysed anytime I was out in public.
But now, two years later, I am on the mend.
Here's how I did it: The first thing you need to do is commit to getting yourself sorted out and you need to believe that you are beautiful, innocent soul (because you are). Now don't get me wrong, this isn't an easy thing to do and it will take time, but a few other measures can make this task easier.
Number one: stop taking ANY type of chemically manufactured drug, especially amphetamines. This includes shelf panadol and cold/flu tablets, unless your really sick but even then use them spraingly. And definately take a break from weed and even alcohol for a while. Roughly, take a break from alcohol for 3-6 months, weed for at least 6 months, amphetamines for at least 1 year. See, what you are trying to do is flush your body of any impurities thus also cleansing your mind and increasing your energy levels.
Number two: eating healthy. Fruits for breakfast, salad sandwhiches for lunch, salad or vegetables for dinner. Haha. Believe me this diet sucks in the beginning but you get used to it. And gradually you can add more of the meals you are used to eating into your menu, but at least eat this way for 3 months before you do this. Really try to avoid too much meat, milk, coffee, sugar, fast food, etc. - you know the foods to avoid, at least in the beginning anyway. After you have been eating healthily for the three months you can eat some of these things again but only in moderation. After 12 months you can eat unhealthily again if you want, once the cleanse is over and you are back to feeling normal again.
Number three: exercise and stay active. I cannot tell you how much it helped me once I changed my job to go work with a gardener, outside in the sun 5 days a week! Exercise and sunlight really make such a HUGE difference. It probably cured 70% of my depression after only one week. It made me feel good about myself, which helped my confidence, which led to me being more optimistic about life, which sped me along my path of recovery. You can still recover following only the first two steps, but by following this step as well and becoming more active in your life, you multiply the speed of your recovery. If you don't want to or can't change your job, plan a project in your backyard that you can work on in the mornings and afternoons (like building a garden), or renovate your house, or help a friend renovate theirs, or volunteer in some community projects on the weekends. Just do something! Keep yourself busy and get as much sunlight as possible. Go for runs in the morning, sign up at the gym. Be imaginitive!
And that's basically it! Once you get on a roll you will instinctivly know what to do. All this takes time (like I said, for me it's taken two years) but it's worth it. I have my life back now, starting to get back in with my friends, enjoy having some beers on the weekend, enjoying my job, about to go to university, even smoking some of the herb occasionally, but the best thing of all, I've gotten out of my head! I feel so much more free-er than I used to as I am not crippled by fear and my over-critical ego. And even though it's been so sh*t, I have learnt alot about the mind and how it works, and maybe I will use this knowledge one day, who knows..
And the funny thing is, my journey is only beginning..
Now there is no guarantee that what has worked for me will work for anyone else, but this has been my experience and I thought it was worth sharing in the hope that it may assist someone else on thier journey. I would appreciate any critical comments on what I have written.
Ok, peace out guys.
PS - one thing that really helped me when I was in a state of high anxiety is to remember this saying: never underestimate the value of a good nights sleep. In other words if your having a sh*t time, know that the next morning you will feel alot better and just try to get through that day/night.
My story: I had a very rough time during the second half of 07'. I don't want to go into too much detail but I had been smoking alot of weed during the two years preceeding this date before I got into heavier drugs (LSD, E's, Meth). This substance abuse coupled with a traumatic life experience left me pretty screwed up, mentally. All the symptons mentioned in this thread I had. I was deeply confused, and riddled with fear. My experiences when high were soo scary, and when I wasn't high I was a stay-at-home introvert finding it ridiculously hard to socialise and feeling paralysed anytime I was out in public.
But now, two years later, I am on the mend.
Here's how I did it: The first thing you need to do is commit to getting yourself sorted out and you need to believe that you are beautiful, innocent soul (because you are). Now don't get me wrong, this isn't an easy thing to do and it will take time, but a few other measures can make this task easier.
Number one: stop taking ANY type of chemically manufactured drug, especially amphetamines. This includes shelf panadol and cold/flu tablets, unless your really sick but even then use them spraingly. And definately take a break from weed and even alcohol for a while. Roughly, take a break from alcohol for 3-6 months, weed for at least 6 months, amphetamines for at least 1 year. See, what you are trying to do is flush your body of any impurities thus also cleansing your mind and increasing your energy levels.
Number two: eating healthy. Fruits for breakfast, salad sandwhiches for lunch, salad or vegetables for dinner. Haha. Believe me this diet sucks in the beginning but you get used to it. And gradually you can add more of the meals you are used to eating into your menu, but at least eat this way for 3 months before you do this. Really try to avoid too much meat, milk, coffee, sugar, fast food, etc. - you know the foods to avoid, at least in the beginning anyway. After you have been eating healthily for the three months you can eat some of these things again but only in moderation. After 12 months you can eat unhealthily again if you want, once the cleanse is over and you are back to feeling normal again.
Number three: exercise and stay active. I cannot tell you how much it helped me once I changed my job to go work with a gardener, outside in the sun 5 days a week! Exercise and sunlight really make such a HUGE difference. It probably cured 70% of my depression after only one week. It made me feel good about myself, which helped my confidence, which led to me being more optimistic about life, which sped me along my path of recovery. You can still recover following only the first two steps, but by following this step as well and becoming more active in your life, you multiply the speed of your recovery. If you don't want to or can't change your job, plan a project in your backyard that you can work on in the mornings and afternoons (like building a garden), or renovate your house, or help a friend renovate theirs, or volunteer in some community projects on the weekends. Just do something! Keep yourself busy and get as much sunlight as possible. Go for runs in the morning, sign up at the gym. Be imaginitive!
And that's basically it! Once you get on a roll you will instinctivly know what to do. All this takes time (like I said, for me it's taken two years) but it's worth it. I have my life back now, starting to get back in with my friends, enjoy having some beers on the weekend, enjoying my job, about to go to university, even smoking some of the herb occasionally, but the best thing of all, I've gotten out of my head! I feel so much more free-er than I used to as I am not crippled by fear and my over-critical ego. And even though it's been so sh*t, I have learnt alot about the mind and how it works, and maybe I will use this knowledge one day, who knows..
And the funny thing is, my journey is only beginning..
Now there is no guarantee that what has worked for me will work for anyone else, but this has been my experience and I thought it was worth sharing in the hope that it may assist someone else on thier journey. I would appreciate any critical comments on what I have written.
Ok, peace out guys.
PS - one thing that really helped me when I was in a state of high anxiety is to remember this saying: never underestimate the value of a good nights sleep. In other words if your having a sh*t time, know that the next morning you will feel alot better and just try to get through that day/night.
I HAVE THESE SAME PROBLEMS SMOKING WEED.....BLURRED VISION, ANXIETY (PARANOIA), SOMETIMES TWITCHING, FAST HEART BEAT, FAST THOUGHTS ALL THAT STUFF.........BUT THE OTHER DAY I FOUND OUT I HAVE LOW POTASSIUM, & LOW POTASSIUM CAUSES IRREGULAR HEART BEAT, DEPRESSION, CONFUSION, MUSCLE WEAKNESS ETC. ........SMOKING CIGARETTES AND WEED INCREASES THESE. SO CHECK INTO YOUR POTASSIUM LEVELS. I HOPE IVE HELPED
Your brain developed with an artificial drug during your formative years. Have fun with your anxiety-ridden and depressed baby.
I smoked pot daily from age 17-22. I never had any anxiety while smoking until I was 20. At 20 I started getting anxiety while smoking. I would smoke and could not leave the house. There was no way I could go out in public. I had my first panic attack when I was 21. I flew out out of state to visit my family. My cousin took me to his buddies house where we were hitting huge bong loads. I was so stoned and around a bunch of people I didn't know and started to feel super uncomfortable. I had a full blown panic attack. I had to get up and go outside. I was burning up so bad and I thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest. After that everything was fine for a while until about 3 months later I had another attack. I smoked a blunt with a buddy then drove home. While driving I felt like my arms were completely numb and had a massive attack. At this point I thought I was having a stroke or heart attack. After that episode I kept smoking and never had any anxiety or anything.
2 years later moved out of the state for a job. I stopped smoking pot for about 3 years. I came home from work one day wen my cousin and his buddy had been given some pot cookies from some friends. They kept asking me "Hey do these with us!" I kept saying "No!" knowing I would probably freak out on them since I hadnt smoked pot for years! Well, they kept bugging me about it until it got on my nerves so bad I just ate a half of one. The second I ate it I knew I was in for a ride. About 30 miutes later it hit me! All of the anxiety came back. I thought I was going to die. I had the worst thoughts imaginable going through my head! I pretty much had a 5 hour long panic attack. Worst night of my life to say the least!
The next day I felt fine. I drove about 2 hours to a casino and had a great time. The day after I had plans with a buddy. I picked him up and during the drive I had a huge panic attack out of no where! I thought I was going to pass out. I couldn't focus on anything. Everything he was saying was just going one ear and out the other. For some reason he didnt even notice anything was wrong.
But ever since this occurrence I have not felt the same (I pretty much think the pot cookies screwed me up mentally). Especially while driving. It is like once I get behind the wheel I get this huge sense of anxiety. I am guessing because I had such a huge panic attack I am afraid of having another while driving. It has been 9 months since an I still am not all there. I avoid driving to a lot of places, especially far places. It has got a lot better than it was but still hard to deal with the anxiety at times. I have started to exercise more and it helps. I notice the best thing is to just keep your mind occupied. I do not want to go on meds. I have seen how addicting they are to people I know and I do not want to depend on any kind of drug.
2 years later moved out of the state for a job. I stopped smoking pot for about 3 years. I came home from work one day wen my cousin and his buddy had been given some pot cookies from some friends. They kept asking me "Hey do these with us!" I kept saying "No!" knowing I would probably freak out on them since I hadnt smoked pot for years! Well, they kept bugging me about it until it got on my nerves so bad I just ate a half of one. The second I ate it I knew I was in for a ride. About 30 miutes later it hit me! All of the anxiety came back. I thought I was going to die. I had the worst thoughts imaginable going through my head! I pretty much had a 5 hour long panic attack. Worst night of my life to say the least!
The next day I felt fine. I drove about 2 hours to a casino and had a great time. The day after I had plans with a buddy. I picked him up and during the drive I had a huge panic attack out of no where! I thought I was going to pass out. I couldn't focus on anything. Everything he was saying was just going one ear and out the other. For some reason he didnt even notice anything was wrong.
But ever since this occurrence I have not felt the same (I pretty much think the pot cookies screwed me up mentally). Especially while driving. It is like once I get behind the wheel I get this huge sense of anxiety. I am guessing because I had such a huge panic attack I am afraid of having another while driving. It has been 9 months since an I still am not all there. I avoid driving to a lot of places, especially far places. It has got a lot better than it was but still hard to deal with the anxiety at times. I have started to exercise more and it helps. I notice the best thing is to just keep your mind occupied. I do not want to go on meds. I have seen how addicting they are to people I know and I do not want to depend on any kind of drug.
OK, well hey people. Id rather not give away my age online so ill just say I'm still in high school.... About 3 days ago i smoked pot, and in that time after i was threw, i had several different feelings, i felt as though the things i was feeling weren't mine, that my body wasn't mine, that the memories i would see of me weren't mine but someone else s, and that i was looking at myself from someone else s point of view. the next day i woke up feeling like i was still high, i went to school and couldn't even have a conversation with anybody, and i couldn't learn. it was like everything the teacher said went in one ear and came out the other. I came home early that day because i couldn't take it. I continuously questioned my sanity and suddenly my existence. I asked myself several things like why we're humans, why are we here etc. and about 45 minutes ago i just broke down and told my parents everything. I feel as if i have this depersonalization disorder because my symptoms match it. All i want to know is if these feelings are permanent? I hate what i feel i have become and i just want to feel the way i used to. Anyone that can help please do. I don't want any smart answers like "well that's what you get for smoking pot" or anything. I'm asking if anyone that has the same experience iv had, do you have any advice? anything that helped you with this feeling? any help is greatly appreciated
i know exactly what your going through. i smoked weed for about my 3rd time about 3 and a half weeks ago. i can deffiinitly tell its slowly going away. but every once in awhile i think about why are we humans and weird stuff like that and it trips me out. hopefully i can fully recover from this, its so hard to ignore.
interesting range of stories and opinions here! this is my first time checking out this forum. i don't usually post on these kinds of things, but i definitely have a lot of experience on the subject, so i thought if it could benefit someone, then i should share it.
i was in a serious accident when i was 17 and almost died. recovery was quite an exhausting task. afterwards, i wouldn't say i was traumatized, because for the most part i was normal and went on with life, but i did have what you could call a depression of sorts, relating especially to my faith that my body was this strong thing that couldn't fall apart. i never drank or did "drugs" until i was about 20. at that point i drank occasionally and then started smoking pot. at first maybe only a couple times a week.
as far back as i can remember, i think was the kind of kid who would sometimes get freaked out by his own thoughts. i'd think about things as i was falling asleep such as "why do we have to breathe?" and then i'd start feeling oppressed by the weight of my chest and wish i didn't have to breath. or i remember how i felt when i found out the sun would eventually die. maybe that's normal stuff, but i believe i have a slightly obsessive and maybe above average emotional sensitivity. it's hard to remember exactly when my first "panic attack" was, but it was definitely after my accident, and the most certainly became rather frequent during the first year of me smoking pot. within a year of starting, i was probably doing it almost every day. within probably 2 years i was doing it multiple times a day and after probably 4 years up until now it is at least multiple times a day, many days it is a rather non-stop thing. i'm 30 now.
for a long time i think i believed the panic attacks were related to my traumatic experience. i thought that was just coming out over time and that my lasting health problems that would be with me for the rest of my life and the depressing state of the world were the things causing me to feel the way i was. it wasn't long after the panic attacks started that i had to start seeing a therapist. i was starting to get a little paranoid and very anxious. one of the most significant sources of my anxiety were the fear that something physically was wrong with me and that i was going to die. i estimate i actually lost 2 years of my sane life to the obsession that i was living with ALS (aka lou gehrig's disease), but that was just one of the medical preoccupations i had. the other even more unacceptable source of anxiety was the notion that i obtained somewhat from my own mind but also influenced by a particular movie i watched at the time, that a normal person could spontaneously lose their sanity and kill someone they loved. i know and have always known that i don't have a violent bone in my body. i don't consciously doubt that the idea that could happen to me is ridiculous. but despite that, or maybe even because of it, the FEAR that it could is the thing that stings me the most of anything. that became unbearable to me so i started taking anti-depressant/anti-anxiety medication.
at this point it is hard to tell which i am more addicted to: the illegal weed or the legal pills. if i stopped smoking the weed, would i need the pills? will i always need the pills? if i stop smoking the weed will i go back to normal ever? who can say until i actually do what seems like the impossible.
the weed "problem" is somewhat unique in our society. it's illegal, yet widely (?) tolerated. we're usually taught up until we're teenagers that it's dangerously addictive and a gateway drug until we eventually learn that it's totally safe and not even a real "drug" anyways. we usually adopt that attitude that is common knowledge anyways that weed isn't even chemically addictive. i've known tons of people who are perfectly normal that smoked weed for years. what facts about weed should we believe? i guess that's where i feel i have something to offer. i don't KNOW anything about weed, but i know what my experiences are: within a year of smoking weed, i had a diminished interest in school, had developed acute anxiety, developed an increased level of obsessive thoughts, increase level of depression. i also hardly hung out with people who didn't smoke weed. this wasn't a conscious decision, it just happens over time. most people i know and hang out with now are those people or people i've met through them. i have a job, but i am "fortunate" enough to have a lax enough schedule that accommodates my incredibly low motivation to work at it. and every night before i go to bed, i think about how tomorrow maybe i'll take a day off smoking weed.
is this going to happen to you if you smoke weed? i'm not saying that. i know tons of well adjusted ACTIVE potheads who are really "successful" and have no emotional problems. i'd even say they're definitely in the majority from my experience. but i am also affected enough by the large numbers of people here who are basically telling my life story to add just a bit more to the part of myself that is moving to make a change. in pothead society, saying you're "addicted" is one of the most embarrassing things you can do, but i think myself and others can benefit from acknowledging to THEMSELVES that it is possible to be addicted ANYTHING, and that if you are suffering from that addiction you should find a real solution to that.
i was in a serious accident when i was 17 and almost died. recovery was quite an exhausting task. afterwards, i wouldn't say i was traumatized, because for the most part i was normal and went on with life, but i did have what you could call a depression of sorts, relating especially to my faith that my body was this strong thing that couldn't fall apart. i never drank or did "drugs" until i was about 20. at that point i drank occasionally and then started smoking pot. at first maybe only a couple times a week.
as far back as i can remember, i think was the kind of kid who would sometimes get freaked out by his own thoughts. i'd think about things as i was falling asleep such as "why do we have to breathe?" and then i'd start feeling oppressed by the weight of my chest and wish i didn't have to breath. or i remember how i felt when i found out the sun would eventually die. maybe that's normal stuff, but i believe i have a slightly obsessive and maybe above average emotional sensitivity. it's hard to remember exactly when my first "panic attack" was, but it was definitely after my accident, and the most certainly became rather frequent during the first year of me smoking pot. within a year of starting, i was probably doing it almost every day. within probably 2 years i was doing it multiple times a day and after probably 4 years up until now it is at least multiple times a day, many days it is a rather non-stop thing. i'm 30 now.
for a long time i think i believed the panic attacks were related to my traumatic experience. i thought that was just coming out over time and that my lasting health problems that would be with me for the rest of my life and the depressing state of the world were the things causing me to feel the way i was. it wasn't long after the panic attacks started that i had to start seeing a therapist. i was starting to get a little paranoid and very anxious. one of the most significant sources of my anxiety were the fear that something physically was wrong with me and that i was going to die. i estimate i actually lost 2 years of my sane life to the obsession that i was living with ALS (aka lou gehrig's disease), but that was just one of the medical preoccupations i had. the other even more unacceptable source of anxiety was the notion that i obtained somewhat from my own mind but also influenced by a particular movie i watched at the time, that a normal person could spontaneously lose their sanity and kill someone they loved. i know and have always known that i don't have a violent bone in my body. i don't consciously doubt that the idea that could happen to me is ridiculous. but despite that, or maybe even because of it, the FEAR that it could is the thing that stings me the most of anything. that became unbearable to me so i started taking anti-depressant/anti-anxiety medication.
at this point it is hard to tell which i am more addicted to: the illegal weed or the legal pills. if i stopped smoking the weed, would i need the pills? will i always need the pills? if i stop smoking the weed will i go back to normal ever? who can say until i actually do what seems like the impossible.
the weed "problem" is somewhat unique in our society. it's illegal, yet widely (?) tolerated. we're usually taught up until we're teenagers that it's dangerously addictive and a gateway drug until we eventually learn that it's totally safe and not even a real "drug" anyways. we usually adopt that attitude that is common knowledge anyways that weed isn't even chemically addictive. i've known tons of people who are perfectly normal that smoked weed for years. what facts about weed should we believe? i guess that's where i feel i have something to offer. i don't KNOW anything about weed, but i know what my experiences are: within a year of smoking weed, i had a diminished interest in school, had developed acute anxiety, developed an increased level of obsessive thoughts, increase level of depression. i also hardly hung out with people who didn't smoke weed. this wasn't a conscious decision, it just happens over time. most people i know and hang out with now are those people or people i've met through them. i have a job, but i am "fortunate" enough to have a lax enough schedule that accommodates my incredibly low motivation to work at it. and every night before i go to bed, i think about how tomorrow maybe i'll take a day off smoking weed.
is this going to happen to you if you smoke weed? i'm not saying that. i know tons of well adjusted ACTIVE potheads who are really "successful" and have no emotional problems. i'd even say they're definitely in the majority from my experience. but i am also affected enough by the large numbers of people here who are basically telling my life story to add just a bit more to the part of myself that is moving to make a change. in pothead society, saying you're "addicted" is one of the most embarrassing things you can do, but i think myself and others can benefit from acknowledging to THEMSELVES that it is possible to be addicted ANYTHING, and that if you are suffering from that addiction you should find a real solution to that.
your story is so like the way my life used to be in every way,naive about smoking weed and listening to everyone its great you wont have any problems,little did i know the paranoia,anxiety,depression, obsessive thoughts were to come for yrs later,and like you i thought other people smoking had no problems and some of them were successful people, wrong most of them would keep there thoughts to themselves,on till yrs later i spoke to some of them and they admitted they also had the same issues and had some quiet worse,marriage break ups addiction problems to other drugs,cocaine,ecstasy and alcohol.i was lucky to get a grip on myself and give up drugs and stay away from anyone who took them it was hard believe me i had worked in nightclubs for 9 yrs and i had excess to free drugs 7 days a week and best of partys,i am not here to lecture people,just to make people aware of the problems that can occur.
I have felt weird since I did weed. I only did it once..Kushand only about half a gram. I was fine for a while and than had a laughing attack that transformed into a panic attack. I freeeeaked! Felt funny the next day, figured it was normal..and the feeling did go. It vanished! I felt normal for thee entire October! Got drunk(more like buzzed) for the first time in october and that went GREAT! I loved it Just felt really happy! Not hung over the next day but really tired...COOL!
Than..November! Everything went allright, untill the 12th! I had a shortness of breathe one night before going to bed..same as I did while I was high! Im not sure what it was..I went to sleep..was fine the next day! Than my brother had it the next day...and for about a week after. I had freaked! Been so warried about him thee entire week! Couldnt go to school couldnt do anything..I got really cold one night and had some heavy chills and while I was sleeping I would drift into the state where your basicly asleep but still a little alert, and I got a head rush! This happened a few times that night and for most of the week!
all I did was pray that my brother would breathe normal again, and as I did a rainbow shot across my seeling! NO sh*t!
and he was able to breathe! I couldnt believe it!
During that week though..my vision got weird, I dont know if its sensetivity to light or what! I look at lights and everything looks weird! Strange, differant! This cleared once my bro could breathe again!
1 week later I had alot of head preassure and visual fog! I was determined that I had a brain tumor! But it turned out to be a sinus infection! It cleared end of november....visual sh*t continued! Bright places look weird still and Im paranoid about stuff all the time and I have visual snow(like a film grain) Light flashes sometimes(not to hppd extent) But it is now March and this sh*t continues!
It seems to be better during the day now that its sunny blue sky's and it also seems to be better sometimes than others.
I think I just have GAD from my first real panic attack that I got from the weed..and than the two bad things that happened after set of a bomb in my brain! And now I have some chemical imbalance or something!
I used to be really happy and outgoing all the time and not to say this has depprived me of this alltogether but I feel something missing from me! I feel a sensation of emptyness! It hasn't destroyed my ability to act but I have a hard time thinking because I CANT GET MY MIND OFF OF THIS! I was also a writer before and I am having trouble come up with ideas as amazing as I did before or see pictures in my head as well. Anxiety does run in my family to an extreme amount and I have an underactive thyroid which I am going to get treated for soon. But I don't know whats going on with me I sit in my classroom's and my vision is just killing me! This cant be permanant! Im only 15 years old and have my entire life ahead of me and a big chance at a sucessful one too because of my acting and story telling ability and fathers connection to the film buiss! But I am finding it hard to even go to school! BUT IM ONLY 15 and I only did pot once....ONCE! And had no intenion of doing it again, just wanted to see what it was like! If I could do anything it would be to return to my normal self again! I get angry at the world because Im a good person and I see assholes at my school making fun of people and makeing people's lives hell and makeing fun of speacial needs students! They talk about how much they "Blazed" And I wonder if this happened to me because of weed...why me from only doing it once and to people who live through their lives doing bad things to other people and smoking and I get some kind of damage and they live a good perfect life despite all the terrible things they have done to me and to others..Personally I believe people like that should be lynched! And people like Seth Rogen! yeah great funny guy! Getting thee idea into people my age heads that weed is fun and makes quote from one of his movies:"Weed makes everything better! It makes music better, food taste better, Hell! It even makes sex better!" Pardon my language but Lynch the f****r! He gets rich off premoting something that we dont even know all the effects of on the brain! THC is very unknown in medical science!
And the regular stoner likes to say its just goverment BS! Which I really thougt! Now I realize despite goverment being greedy liars! They are not always trying to hurt you, lie or do bad for you! I fear my life is ruined and I want it back!
Than..November! Everything went allright, untill the 12th! I had a shortness of breathe one night before going to bed..same as I did while I was high! Im not sure what it was..I went to sleep..was fine the next day! Than my brother had it the next day...and for about a week after. I had freaked! Been so warried about him thee entire week! Couldnt go to school couldnt do anything..I got really cold one night and had some heavy chills and while I was sleeping I would drift into the state where your basicly asleep but still a little alert, and I got a head rush! This happened a few times that night and for most of the week!
all I did was pray that my brother would breathe normal again, and as I did a rainbow shot across my seeling! NO sh*t!
and he was able to breathe! I couldnt believe it!
During that week though..my vision got weird, I dont know if its sensetivity to light or what! I look at lights and everything looks weird! Strange, differant! This cleared once my bro could breathe again!
1 week later I had alot of head preassure and visual fog! I was determined that I had a brain tumor! But it turned out to be a sinus infection! It cleared end of november....visual sh*t continued! Bright places look weird still and Im paranoid about stuff all the time and I have visual snow(like a film grain) Light flashes sometimes(not to hppd extent) But it is now March and this sh*t continues!
It seems to be better during the day now that its sunny blue sky's and it also seems to be better sometimes than others.
I think I just have GAD from my first real panic attack that I got from the weed..and than the two bad things that happened after set of a bomb in my brain! And now I have some chemical imbalance or something!
I used to be really happy and outgoing all the time and not to say this has depprived me of this alltogether but I feel something missing from me! I feel a sensation of emptyness! It hasn't destroyed my ability to act but I have a hard time thinking because I CANT GET MY MIND OFF OF THIS! I was also a writer before and I am having trouble come up with ideas as amazing as I did before or see pictures in my head as well. Anxiety does run in my family to an extreme amount and I have an underactive thyroid which I am going to get treated for soon. But I don't know whats going on with me I sit in my classroom's and my vision is just killing me! This cant be permanant! Im only 15 years old and have my entire life ahead of me and a big chance at a sucessful one too because of my acting and story telling ability and fathers connection to the film buiss! But I am finding it hard to even go to school! BUT IM ONLY 15 and I only did pot once....ONCE! And had no intenion of doing it again, just wanted to see what it was like! If I could do anything it would be to return to my normal self again! I get angry at the world because Im a good person and I see assholes at my school making fun of people and makeing people's lives hell and makeing fun of speacial needs students! They talk about how much they "Blazed" And I wonder if this happened to me because of weed...why me from only doing it once and to people who live through their lives doing bad things to other people and smoking and I get some kind of damage and they live a good perfect life despite all the terrible things they have done to me and to others..Personally I believe people like that should be lynched! And people like Seth Rogen! yeah great funny guy! Getting thee idea into people my age heads that weed is fun and makes quote from one of his movies:"Weed makes everything better! It makes music better, food taste better, Hell! It even makes sex better!" Pardon my language but Lynch the f****r! He gets rich off premoting something that we dont even know all the effects of on the brain! THC is very unknown in medical science!
And the regular stoner likes to say its just goverment BS! Which I really thougt! Now I realize despite goverment being greedy liars! They are not always trying to hurt you, lie or do bad for you! I fear my life is ruined and I want it back!
`hi im 16 and i have stopped smoking weed now for about 8 weeks.. 8 weeks ago i took an awful panic attack on the weed and it has had a bad effect on my life since ..i get down i get symptons of panic and anxiety attacks and im really stuck in a bad hole that i cant get out of ?? i am seeking help from a clinical doctor that helps me with this bad time i am having
good luck to all you people that are the same as me .....
good luck to all you people that are the same as me .....