Erection during intercourse

:-( I have the same exact problem, i am looking for a remedy too. I know its not physical because like you said i can also masturbate fine and get up fine during foreplay. But after like a minute or less of intercourse i lose my erection. I don't know why. Maybe pressure? Can anyone help?

your gf aint tight or shes just not hot enoguh to make you want it enough ,..in your head you want it but your weapons outa ammo for it but i rekon if you do stop hittin the old salami for a day you should be frikkin turned on by tomorrow ..hope i helped and skip the bj 4 play then just eff her (but give her 4 play to satisfy her lol) have fun ..cya

Have some confidence in your performance. Tell her to hype her big man up and you will be there. All in your head!

I have EXACTLY the same problem!!

In fact I found this site by googling "can't have normal intercourse, can only come from masturbation". I have 100% the same problem as the original poster.

Masturbation or handjobs are very easy and enjoyable for me. However, when I try to have intercourse, I have absolutely no sensation when thrusting. Even from the very first thrusts I know that it's pointless, I'm not feeling anything, so inevitably I lose my erection within minutes and can't continue.

Like the original poster I also masturbate daily. However, all males masturbate, so there must be something more to it. Maybe it's the specific masturbation style that's the problem? Anyway, I tried a period of abstinence for about a month, but things didn't really improve. Another possibility is condoms, but even the ultra-sensitive ones don't help.

If anyone can come forward with any similar stories or how they've been able to have normal intercourse, or what the problem is, PLEASE share... This condition doesn't really have a "name" so it was really hard to find anything about it on the web, at least I'm happy I have found ONE resource that deals with exactly this problem!!

:'( :'( :'(

I have had this problem ever since losing my virginity a couple of years ago, with all kinds of women of all shapes and sizes!!! So it's very pervasive and serious...

tstkbp, your original post is from February; in case you still check this site, can you tell us if you've solved this problem or at least improved, and if so how???

Hi guys ...

I'm a woman with a sweet, sexy man who has the same problem. Nothing is unsurmountable! : ) It seems this is not an unusual condition for many of you. I'm doing some research and have found quite a bit of information on things to try to remedy the issue (without resorting to drugs!!). I can share those with you if you like. Ask, and I'll post. I have quite a bit of sexual experience and some of the things I usually like to try in bed I think will be very helpful, in this situation.

btw, the person who said something about a partner not being "hot" enough or "tight" enough is giving erroneous, ignorant information. I suspect you are about 21 years old (at least I hope so, with that comment). Please refrain from commenting and see if you can learn something instead, puppy. I'm a 45 year old dynamo with a soon to be 54 year old incredibly sexy, fit partner and this problem has nothing to do with that. You sound like a very superficial young man.

So guys ... keep up this conversation so I can learn more. Has anyone posted this question to the "experts" to see what they have to say? Let me know if you'd like me to post my summary of possibilities ... ; ) Going to try them myself next time I see that hot blue eyed boy of mine. (smile)

Oh and one more thing ... if you truly care about your partner and she cares about you, you will work this out. It's worth it. (another smile)

Sweet Violet

i have the same problem, too...except for the first 2 times I've had sex I could keep the erection, but last time it went away very quick once we started having sex and even goes away sometimes now while she is giving me a ha****b. I have no idea what changed and why this is happening and hope it was just a one time thing with sex, but yea sweet violet...if you could tell me anything you know that could help that'd be nice...in particular something I can do instead of my girlfriend.

thanks

Hi sweet violet,

pls post your findings. it will be very much useful to new comers like me



thanks in advance

john

Nice to see I can relate to other people, but no one has answered why it happens. It has happend to me three times.... this is what usually happens. I am with a girl...we are kissing, touching, talking, grinding, just having a great time before sex. During all that I am hard as a rock. Then its time to stick it in...and I literally just lose my boner. It is horrible...and kind of depressing. My first time was with my ex... I had no problems at all. Then one time after I was in the whole one time hook up situation...first time ever. So I actually couldnt get hard at all.. i was way too nervous in be in such a situation - I've never talked/seen that girl after that.
My second time...beautiful girl is on my bed...wanting me...i'm wanting her. We are having a good time...i am really hard...then its gametime... I go for it.....then I lose my boner. We talked about it.....she thought i was gay...hahahaha :$ Happy ending....next time we are together... we have sex! Then I effed her hard for a few weeks...until we broke up for other reasons.
Third time (the worst) I am with the girl of my dreams (atm) we are allllll over eachother being really bad...and dirty ;-) After about.... 1.5 hours of foreplay (the entire time I am the hardest ive ever been) then finally she agrees....I go for it...kind of hard...cant find where to go...she helps.... I lose it. Horrible!!! the car ride home i was screaming and cussing!!! She is my dream girl and I came up short. Whyyyyyyyyyy?!!?! :'(
It happend to my old room mate...when he told me... I laughed out loud even though it had happend to me. Jokes on me I suppose... but..putting all that aside. Condoms seem to help. I'm not sure... every successful time ive been with a girl... all that happens...its gametime...instead of going for it directly and losing my boner.. i strap up...and while im putting on the condom i get really hard. Then go for it right away! and once im in I will not lose my boner. go condoms!

I have had the same problem before.

It happens, even to turned on young lads. If the girl's not willing to wait it out and make him comfortable then there is no hope. It's usually a result of being nervous.

If the girl understands, then you will get another chance. Take it slow.

If she makes fun of you, she's a piece of sh*t anyway so kick her to the curb.

I've had both reactions and the girls who reacted kindly got the lay of their life.

Also, if you know you are going to have sex, don't jerk off for a while.

Avoid alcohol and other stimulants.

I wish this problem didn't exist. It's lost me many a girl and had mortified me on several occasions. I am finally beginning to overcome it I think.

It just happened with a girl I really like. We are trying again on Sunday. So I'm leaving the guy alone down there until then!

Everybody listen up, point here is, what is the solution? All of us have lost our erections at totally bad times and when it was most needed as in the case of my friend in the previous post.

So what can we do about it? Allopathy doesn't have an answer coz I've been to 2 Urologists and both of them were not able to solve the issue. Homeopathy? Ayurveda? Other alternative medicine? If someone knows anything, please share with the forum

Same sh*t happens to me. i feel like such a disgrace with my girlfriend. She is great and supportive about it, and doesnt try to rush into anything, but i still feel like an as****e. i saw some other site that recommended zinc pills. i dont really know what thats about though. hopefully someone comes a with an answer for us.

I have a solution here!

Having trouble "getting up":

Usually this results from poor blood circulation. Therefore, you must - that's right - INCREASE the circulation! Therefore, a lot of whole wheat foods, beans, veggies, fruits, nuts, cold fish, etc. Coincidentlly, these foods are high in zinc haha.

Also, it could be a psychological occurrence. I'm currently in the midst of a situation like this. My first time ended up in her saying "Wrong hole" and I vowed on my life never to go NEAR that hole, so that shot down my self pride. Now, I have no self pride so I can't even get an erection.

It's kind of a mixture for me, but also I think I should get back to tree-climbing and Dance Dance Revolution again. That would help improve circulation.

Anyway, maintaining an erection is on the same lines.

Don't bother thanking me, I'm just passing by on this site. But if you want to thank me somehow, just watch the Spandex Ninja on Youtube and post your comments =]

There are a lot of reasons why someone can't keep their erection. I have had sex with probably 8 different girls in my young age of 20. But recently I met this girl who was very independent and demanding; a brat basically. She intimidated me, and that made me not confident in myself. Since then i've had to question myself before hooking up with a girl, and it's horrible and makes me lose my erection. It's relatively easy for me to have sex without a condom, but when I put one on I just lose my motivation to have sex. There are a few reasons to this.

You may be more concentrated on something other than sex. Are you a college student? I dont think the stereotype of the turned on college student is necessarily true; the guy who has sex with everyone and is the big man on campus. College is tough and if you are concentrated on your work, then you aren't concentrated on hooking up with girls all hours of the day. This can be true for anyone who is a workaholic or just too concentrated on something else.

Do you exercise enough? You have to feel good about yourself before you try and make other people feel good about themselves. Workout daily, join a recreational sport or do something that will make you proud of yourself so you can feel like you're on top of the world, where your state of mind should belong in the first place.

Is the girl you are sexually active with demanding? If she is, this can be intimidating as I stated before, and as you probably already know if you're in such a situation. Kick that girl out of your life because you will NEVER feel good about yourself if she doesn't allow you to feel good about yourself.

This is a big one though...

If any of you have had a girl that you think you love or at least think about a lot, this can have something to do with it. I broke with my ex of 3 years about a year ago which whom I still love. I did it because I wanted my freedom/independence back but the memory of her haunts me, and I can't help but be more interested in her than any other girl regardless of how attractive they are.

So if you see a different girl who is very attractive in your eyes and normally would get you aroused, but you aren't, that's fine. You have to trust yourself; because if your body is telling you that you're not aroused enough to have sex, then you are truly not ready to have sex with that person.

Pay more attention to yourself rather than trying to please other people, and when you've found that you are truly ready to play the field again go for it.

Until then, eat right, exercise and feel good about yourself. Get interested in a hobby or work and be proud of something. I'm a strong believer of everything happening for a reason, and you'll figure out your reason in time! Good luck to you all.

this has happend to me once and i sadly admit it.

When it did happen to me i was on ecstasy which is known for giving one a hard time to gain an erection despite what some people might say..

Anyways i was hard as hell getting a ha****b and during a blow job but when i pulled out the condom and she agreed after i strapped it on i went limp and was no longer interested for some reason.

Tried restimulating myself.. no luck

but when she began to blow me i reained hardness...

I believe its if you take to long to get started you will lose interest or hardness and once this happends you demoralize your self...

So overall once your hard and good to go dont waste time...