I don't enjoy sex?

I totally know what you all mean i have been married for two years and love my husband to death but i just hate having sex. It is so anoying and i wish that it didnt even exist actually. I thought that it was because i just had a kid but my children are 20 months and 4 months and still nothing. My husband has a huge sex drive and i have none. He gets very frustrated with me because i never want to do it but it is actually painful and i just count the seconds til it is over. I thought that it was all in my head but i am starting to think there is something wrong with me and it is causing huge problems between me and my husband. if anyone has a cure let me in on the secret. men have viagra what do they have for women lol.

I can see this topic is a bit old, but I hope maybe my input will give a slight help to anyone new searching it.
I had/have the same problem of lack of feeling during sex. I have only orgasmed once during intimacy, and that was in a 69 position, ONLY after he had told me he was close did I relax enough to orgasm myself.
However, my partner and I have found a solution, an odd one though.
Of course, this wont be the case for everyone, and I am still young (at 19), but we found that in a kinky situation, i.e. where he is Master, and I am slave, I was capable of enjoying the sex. I want to make him happy, and please him, and once the pressure was taken off of me to actively make him happy, and he just took total control to do what he wanted, I found it FAR more enjoyable, and found myself far more relaxed and content in our sex life.
I won't say this is a solution for everyone, but I've slept with about 6 guys, and been intimate with numerous more, and never felt anything except when we undertook this experiment.
I think a big problem for a lot of women is that they feel pressured to constantly have sex, and hence never get the chance to build their sex drive up. And eventually they reach a point where they can't take it anymore, and decide consciously they have no interest in sex anymore. The pressure now for me is gone. I WANT to please him sexually, the way he makes me so complete emotionally, and now I don't have to make any decisions, or put myself under any kind of pressure to perform. He just does what he likes (of course within reason), and I'm more than willing to comply to make him happy.

Yeah. This is kind of a curve ball solution, I know, but its one that worked for me.

Oh, and for how an orgasm feels?
For me, at least, since apparently my whole sexual side is tied up with pleasing my partner, my orgasms are generally pretty awful. A second of pleasure, body convulsions, and yeah. Its over. From my perspective and experience, definitely not worth the rave reviews.

It's probably an emotional thing. 19 and the most I've done is fool around and some touching, but it does nothing and is uncomfortable. Research the psychological side of it and see if you can find anything that you can relate to; maybe a few therapy sessions can help you.

i am a female age 20 and i have been having sex with my fianace for about a year now and i have the same problem i dont feel anything no pleasure at times i feel pain. i dont enjoy sex infact i have never enjoyed sex. It heartbreaking because he is my high school sweet heart and i love him dearly. It is fustrating because he cheated and even though am upset and disappointed i can put the blame all on him because we hardly ever have sex and he is a young 21 yr old who loves and enjoys sex. i feel as if am cheating him out a better life. I would just love if i can solve this one and perhaps experience an orgasm that most people go crazy about.

I have been married for about 12 years and have absolutely no desire for sex. In fact, it is a chore to me. I almost resent it. All day, I give to my kids, clean the house, hold down a job, cook, do laundry and so on, and sex is just another chore that I don't want to do. Most men think that women LOVE IT, but most women I know hate it. I dread going to bed at night knowing that he may want it. I would rather just go to sleep. I can't even go to bed and rest. Of course if I don't "give it up" he pouts all the next day and is horrible to live with. So, like other woman, I give it up and force myself to do it, and fake the pleasure just to keep the peace. I think sex is a big waste of time, and I wouldn't care if I ever did it again. Why bother, what is the point?? Most women do it just for the man, and that is a fact of life.

Wow... This actually makes me feel so much better...
I am 19 and I have only had 4 sexpartners. I am so happy I can talk to my mom about everything, also my lack of interest in sexual intercourse. It is weird because I am a very sexual being. I love touching, kissing, all sorts of foreplay, and I do get very wet, but it does absolutely nothing for me if the other person fingers me and finally sticks his penis in me. I am sure that I am not tensing up; I have seen loads of penises and I enjoy giving oral pleasure to the guys, I really do, but as soon as they are in me it hurts and I just can't see myself ever enjoying it. This is so frustrating because nobody seems to understand. The only "tip" I get is to try and be relaxed, but seriously; I am!
Anyway, it was good just to get this off my chest...
What to do against it? I wish I knew...

We should reconsider the stereotype that all people have to have sex and have to want sex.
Every person is defferent, so the sex drive and nothing wrong with not liking sex, like nothing wrong with
not liking lobsters or being vegeterian.
We should stop advising go to see a doctor to a person who doesnt like sex. You are who you are and have to find
a compatible parter. You just a minority, so what? So many of different kind and we do not send others to the doctor
to treat this.
So, no worry, go on with you life and be proud of it, feel sorry for those who feel otherwise.

Simple fact: most women do not feel anything from simple penetration.

Our greatest place of feeling is actually external, the clitoris. I too, feel nothing internally, but using a vibrator on the outside around the clitoris is a no fail way to orgasm. I suggest looking into it and also penis rings with vibrators attached.

I'm so glad I'm not alone. But I think my situation is a bit different than what I've read here.
When I was young, sex was great. I enjoyed it. It felt great.
Now I'm 35, and sex is the equivalent of rubbing my forearm. There is no feeling there. I feel my husbands penis, but there is no "good sensation" like there should be.
Even clitoral stimulation is become more and more difficult. Even sex toys are becoming pointless. It's frustrating to have something I've enjoyed in the past slip away like this. I can't imagine what the issue could be. But at least I'm not alone in wishing I didn't have to have sex with my husband. I love him, but the sex is terrible.
It's not fair. I used to enjoy sex so much. And I still want to. But my body just won't cooperate.
I've spoken to 2 doctors and neither one could tell me anything. So frustrating!

I am 19 years old and do not enjoy sex. i have been with the same guy for seven months, and we're living together. i am very much in love with him. our relationship is perfect (well, nearly) and we never fight. he is seven years older than me. we used to have sex frequently, but as with all of my relationships i "lost interest" after a few months. though truthfully, i guess i didn't want to admit that sex was painful and disgusting in the beginning, for fear that i'd scare him off... which in retrospect is just cruel. to lure a guy in until he actually cares for you, only to surprise him with the fact that you think sex is gross, and don't enjoy it in the slightest. what is wrong with me?

he's been so patient with me, telling me that i'm not all that different from most girls and that the act of sex is not what's important to him. but last night, i saw a different side of him. he told me to be normal like everyone else, and that i was being selfish for not trying. where did this come from? if sex is the reason that my loving boyfriend is saying all these hurtful things, why would i want any part of it? sure, he apologized later... but he can't take back what he said. his words have been on repeat in my mind - and i didn't think it possible, but i actually want to have sex even less now. most every relationship i've ever been in has ended because of sex. is it any wonder that, with someone i actually care about, i would want to avoid it altogether?

intercourse is very painful. comparable to a radial boxcutter, if there were such a thing. sexual alternatives make me feel worthless for not being able to just "do it" the normal way. frankly, it's embarrassing. every doctor/nurse practitioner i have ever seen says the same thing. "more lubrication!" thanks for the advice, doc - but it's not lube that i lack, it's sexual desire altogether! one even suggested i carry around a bottle of olive oil with me. it took everything in my power not to ask her if she was retarded.

furthermore, am i gay? i've been thinking about it a lot lately... i am attracted to girls. although it would make sense, it would also break my heart. i see myself having children with him. what if it turns out that i can't, just because of weird chemical sh*t going on in my brain? is god punishing me? if so, what for? pre-marital sex, or the possibility that i might be a homosexual? FML

I am the same it just hurts and i get nothing out of it there is a huge number of people who are the same i really wish there was something i could do. i still do it to bond with my husband i never told him he is the only one getting something out of it...

yeh I have it too:(
but with me I can have an orgasm through clitoral stimulation so I was REALLY hoping there was a bit of hope 4 me:)
I get really worked up before sex, but as soon as we start im just laying there waiting 4 him 2 finish.
I thought it was maybe me thinking it wouldnt work everytime, so Ive tried more stuff and more positions but it still doesn't seem 2 b working:( I love my boyfriend so much and I can see its upsetting him so I hav 2 fix it!!!
anyone have any suggestions 2 help me get more in the mood?

I too have felt this way.....then I lost my virginity and well.....hookem horns

I believe a vibrator may work the best for all of you females, that don't enjoy sex with your partner.

I just got married 8 months ago and was a virgin untill i got married. I thought sex would be great but its not at all. I doesnt hurt or anything but Its not enjoyable at all. He's the sweetest man! Buys me flowers and chocolates and cards and cooks me dinner all the time....he even tries to get me going with foreplay but all i can think is "c'mon just get it over with...." or "are you almost done....." I feel so bad and dont know what to do. We use a vibrator for me and it gets the job done but sometimes i dont even care for that much. He'll try to be like...."You want the vibrator..." And i'm just like....no thats ok, not really. i dont get t.