i am 37 years old my sex life has been good but in recent 4 months i am not able to get the sexual feeling too much,is that because of stress and tension? i losse erection while penetrating and just cant concentrate but if i masturbate my erection is ok.can you please tell me why is happening?
As a sex therapist the first thing I'd insist upon would be a thorough
physical by either a urologist well versed in E.D. or an internist who
is equally qualified. If any doctor gives you the "Stress Answer" tell
him you want a second opinion THAT IS MEDICAL IN NATURE..... AFTER A THOROUGH
WORKUP, NOT SOME EASY ANSWER THAT IS MORE PSYCHOLOGICAL MISH MOSH THAN HELPFUL. I'd
expect him to do a complete blood workup including cholesterol levels; a
check for diabetes; and so on; I'd expect him to evaluate your general
physical fitness; whether you had any trouble with your circulatory
system; hormone levels; a complete FAMILY HISTORY.... and so on and so
on...... naturally including a thorough workup of your groin and all its
goodies. I'd want a copy of his findings and any treatment plan he developed for you. If he declared you healthy I'd still want any suggestions he might have to offer.
You do NOT need a psychological block in order to see me and if indeed you have some medical problem, while that is being corrected IF YOU WANTED I could teach you a number of ways to SPICE UP YOUR SEX LIFE.
From lecturing college men and dealing with hundreds of clients I've found that most American males get their Sexual Expertise from watching XXX movies. The ONLY thing you'll learn from that kind of porn is how to be predictably DULL. Porn usually shows the same sex scenes over and over with different models playing the parts........ throwing in ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE PLOT LINES.
I'd like to think that when you leave me you could have sex with your partner every night for a year without repeating what you did.
For example, you take turns at waiting on each other hand and foot. One night you begin by doing the cooking, then bathing your partner so that he/she does not have to move a muscle...... and you wear a jock strap or a thong...... THE WORD IS PROVOCATIVE. I want the two of you panting after five or ten minutes...... while your orgasm remains hours away. I believe that EDGING IS THE KEY TO TRULY BLISSFUL SEX. After a sensuous bath using only your hands and no washcloths, you give your partner a full body massage with Olive Oil and without your thong/jockstrap, bringing them to the edge of orgasm a few times...... but the one doing all the work is very, very, very, very BAD and teases the hell out of the other and himself, in the process. By now the dirty talk should be flowing and YOU should be asking, "What would you like me to do to you right now?......... tell me in street language and I might do it...... but you've really got to motivate me." After your partner begins the description, you add your two cents here and there and tell them how turned on you are." AND SHOW THEM. Next comes a tongue bath to remove all the Olive Oil (use an oil for the massage that you can eat). BTW you must plan on sex to be MESSY OR IT'S NO FUN. During the massage don't be afraid to rub your entire body over your partner's to really work each other up. And after a couple hours when you're ready to hit the home stretch, you do not have to cum via intercourse.... that's why you have tongues, fingers, toes, hair and other parts. BE ORIGINAL. Sure you can use your penis to eventually paint your partner and then rub it in. BE CREATIVE!!
Another example would include light bondage........ YUM, some rope...... being tied up....... and "worked on" by your partner. And guys you haven't lived until you've been spanked by your partner...... don't worry you won't laugh..... that's why they make gags. I'd suggest you tie each other up on different nights, so when you're tied you fully experience that feeling of helplessness...... VERY EROTIC...... You can add tickle torture..... and work to get off with only the stimulation of a feather to help you........ talk about sweating like a pig!!! Watch YOURSELF OR YOUR PARTNER arch their back to reach that wandering feather.
I could go on for another hundred pages before slowing down. I haven't even mentioned the use of toys, or common household items like the spring loaded clothes pins, or hypnosis, or eating food off each other (hell, just feeding your partner when you tie them up can be amazingly erotic....... their helplessness gives each of you a different sense....... your partner feels like a child again... but sexually charged...... while you feel powerful and can intentionally spill food into his/her naked lap.... then either feed it to them or lick it up yourself. Lord, there's so much more.
Good luck Rajiv and remember if you see a sex therapist who knows his business the first thing he'll want is for you to have a complete physical with your E.D. as the central theme.
If you came to me after a clean bill of health I'd ask you how long you usually take to masturbate, start to finish. MEN NEED TO DO TWO THINGS. FIRST, DO KEGELS EVERY DAY. MEN NEED THEM EVEN MORE THAN WOMEN. They will give you harder erections and may even cause you to grow a bit. They WILL make you hit the ceiling when you shoot. If you don't know what kegels are Google them. Work up to 500 in the morning and 500 in the evening. You can do them while sitting at a desk or watching TV. Let me add that most porn stars do kegels religiously so their "money shots" really travel and with FORCE. SECOND men must STOP jacking off at record speeds. When you train your body to reach Climax in under five minutes you're setting yourself up for early ejaculation. MEN MUST LEARN HOW TO EDGE THEMSELVES WHEN THEY MASTURBATE. Use toys...... masturbation sleeves...... don't just stimulate your penis.... go for your nipples (while leaving your penis alone)....... work your balls (the slang is so much hotter)....... or would you prefer "rub your testicles and leave your penis alone?"
Get to know every inch of your body!! Ever play with the area behind your knees? the sides and back of your neck just under your ears...... how about your chest and your belly....... and the hair on your legs. Masturbation should be TEACHING YOU ABOUT YOUR BODY, AND SHOWING YOU HOW TO LAST FOR HOURS WITHOUT CUMMMING.
It's often easier to get a hard-on for masturbation because the only one you're thinking about pleasing is YOU. When all your attention is on yourself it's far simpler to get and remain excited, plus you're free to imagine all your forbidden fantasies.
If you read what I wrote about the types of sex I advocate with your partner you'll see immediately that I want you to lose yourself in the activity. I want you to forget about your erection. I want you to pay attention to your whole body and how good every part feels at various moments. I want you to SPEAK DURING SEX...... but not that c**p from XXX movies. I want you to blurt out what comes to your mind about how you are feeling...... how your penis feels....... how your nipples feel...... how your balls feel....... NOTHING COMPLEX..... NOTHING THAT TAKES THOUGHT. NO THOUGHT ALLOWED EXCEPT WHAT IS NECESSARY TO KEEP THINGS GOING.
Once you get into this behavior you become a true wild man. You don't undress, you tear your clothes off. You have days where you don't wear underwear...... IT MAKES YOU FEEL MORE MANLY. GUYS, STOP BEING ASHAMED OF YOUR penises AND YOUR ERECTIONS.
FROM THE TIME WE ARE CHILDREN OUR MASCULINITY IS STOLEN BIT BY BIT. We are taught to never touch that filthy thing between our legs..... usually by the same people who tell us we are made in God's image. Well, if we're made in God's image then God has a penis and Jesus had a penis. Some of you will think this is profane. THAT GOES TO SHOW YOU HOW OUR MALENESS HAS BEEN TAKEN FROM US AND HOW WE'VE BEEN MADE TO BE ASHAMED OF IT. The freedom of going commando (no underwear) is not only liberating, but reminds us all day that WE ARE MEN. It feels wonderful........ And yes, I get more erections...... SO WHAT? I give lectures with erections. I conduct business with erections and the ONLY comment I've ever heard was..... "What's he so HAPPY about?" When I work a Comedy Club I tell the audience I don't wear underwear and watch them strain to see through my pants....... unless, I'm having a really good time and then they get visual proof.
BE MEN AND BE PROUD. TAKE BACK YOUR MASCULINITY. I wouldn't want any of you to lose your jobs so if you go commando learn how to put your penis down your leg or to your side....... and if you work with children wear a jock strap. It's underwear but has a sexy feel to it. I deal with adults so I don't worry about such things...... I do own jockstraps..... but only for play.
Good luck Rajiv. Whatever the outcome work for a much better sex life.
You do NOT need a psychological block in order to see me and if indeed you have some medical problem, while that is being corrected IF YOU WANTED I could teach you a number of ways to SPICE UP YOUR SEX LIFE.
From lecturing college men and dealing with hundreds of clients I've found that most American males get their Sexual Expertise from watching XXX movies. The ONLY thing you'll learn from that kind of porn is how to be predictably DULL. Porn usually shows the same sex scenes over and over with different models playing the parts........ throwing in ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE PLOT LINES.
I'd like to think that when you leave me you could have sex with your partner every night for a year without repeating what you did.
For example, you take turns at waiting on each other hand and foot. One night you begin by doing the cooking, then bathing your partner so that he/she does not have to move a muscle...... and you wear a jock strap or a thong...... THE WORD IS PROVOCATIVE. I want the two of you panting after five or ten minutes...... while your orgasm remains hours away. I believe that EDGING IS THE KEY TO TRULY BLISSFUL SEX. After a sensuous bath using only your hands and no washcloths, you give your partner a full body massage with Olive Oil and without your thong/jockstrap, bringing them to the edge of orgasm a few times...... but the one doing all the work is very, very, very, very BAD and teases the hell out of the other and himself, in the process. By now the dirty talk should be flowing and YOU should be asking, "What would you like me to do to you right now?......... tell me in street language and I might do it...... but you've really got to motivate me." After your partner begins the description, you add your two cents here and there and tell them how turned on you are." AND SHOW THEM. Next comes a tongue bath to remove all the Olive Oil (use an oil for the massage that you can eat). BTW you must plan on sex to be MESSY OR IT'S NO FUN. During the massage don't be afraid to rub your entire body over your partner's to really work each other up. And after a couple hours when you're ready to hit the home stretch, you do not have to cum via intercourse.... that's why you have tongues, fingers, toes, hair and other parts. BE ORIGINAL. Sure you can use your penis to eventually paint your partner and then rub it in. BE CREATIVE!!
Another example would include light bondage........ YUM, some rope...... being tied up....... and "worked on" by your partner. And guys you haven't lived until you've been spanked by your partner...... don't worry you won't laugh..... that's why they make gags. I'd suggest you tie each other up on different nights, so when you're tied you fully experience that feeling of helplessness...... VERY EROTIC...... You can add tickle torture..... and work to get off with only the stimulation of a feather to help you........ talk about sweating like a pig!!! Watch YOURSELF OR YOUR PARTNER arch their back to reach that wandering feather.
I could go on for another hundred pages before slowing down. I haven't even mentioned the use of toys, or common household items like the spring loaded clothes pins, or hypnosis, or eating food off each other (hell, just feeding your partner when you tie them up can be amazingly erotic....... their helplessness gives each of you a different sense....... your partner feels like a child again... but sexually charged...... while you feel powerful and can intentionally spill food into his/her naked lap.... then either feed it to them or lick it up yourself. Lord, there's so much more.
Good luck Rajiv and remember if you see a sex therapist who knows his business the first thing he'll want is for you to have a complete physical with your E.D. as the central theme.
If you came to me after a clean bill of health I'd ask you how long you usually take to masturbate, start to finish. MEN NEED TO DO TWO THINGS. FIRST, DO KEGELS EVERY DAY. MEN NEED THEM EVEN MORE THAN WOMEN. They will give you harder erections and may even cause you to grow a bit. They WILL make you hit the ceiling when you shoot. If you don't know what kegels are Google them. Work up to 500 in the morning and 500 in the evening. You can do them while sitting at a desk or watching TV. Let me add that most porn stars do kegels religiously so their "money shots" really travel and with FORCE. SECOND men must STOP jacking off at record speeds. When you train your body to reach Climax in under five minutes you're setting yourself up for early ejaculation. MEN MUST LEARN HOW TO EDGE THEMSELVES WHEN THEY MASTURBATE. Use toys...... masturbation sleeves...... don't just stimulate your penis.... go for your nipples (while leaving your penis alone)....... work your balls (the slang is so much hotter)....... or would you prefer "rub your testicles and leave your penis alone?"
Get to know every inch of your body!! Ever play with the area behind your knees? the sides and back of your neck just under your ears...... how about your chest and your belly....... and the hair on your legs. Masturbation should be TEACHING YOU ABOUT YOUR BODY, AND SHOWING YOU HOW TO LAST FOR HOURS WITHOUT CUMMMING.
It's often easier to get a hard-on for masturbation because the only one you're thinking about pleasing is YOU. When all your attention is on yourself it's far simpler to get and remain excited, plus you're free to imagine all your forbidden fantasies.
If you read what I wrote about the types of sex I advocate with your partner you'll see immediately that I want you to lose yourself in the activity. I want you to forget about your erection. I want you to pay attention to your whole body and how good every part feels at various moments. I want you to SPEAK DURING SEX...... but not that c**p from XXX movies. I want you to blurt out what comes to your mind about how you are feeling...... how your penis feels....... how your nipples feel...... how your balls feel....... NOTHING COMPLEX..... NOTHING THAT TAKES THOUGHT. NO THOUGHT ALLOWED EXCEPT WHAT IS NECESSARY TO KEEP THINGS GOING.
Once you get into this behavior you become a true wild man. You don't undress, you tear your clothes off. You have days where you don't wear underwear...... IT MAKES YOU FEEL MORE MANLY. GUYS, STOP BEING ASHAMED OF YOUR penises AND YOUR ERECTIONS.
FROM THE TIME WE ARE CHILDREN OUR MASCULINITY IS STOLEN BIT BY BIT. We are taught to never touch that filthy thing between our legs..... usually by the same people who tell us we are made in God's image. Well, if we're made in God's image then God has a penis and Jesus had a penis. Some of you will think this is profane. THAT GOES TO SHOW YOU HOW OUR MALENESS HAS BEEN TAKEN FROM US AND HOW WE'VE BEEN MADE TO BE ASHAMED OF IT. The freedom of going commando (no underwear) is not only liberating, but reminds us all day that WE ARE MEN. It feels wonderful........ And yes, I get more erections...... SO WHAT? I give lectures with erections. I conduct business with erections and the ONLY comment I've ever heard was..... "What's he so HAPPY about?" When I work a Comedy Club I tell the audience I don't wear underwear and watch them strain to see through my pants....... unless, I'm having a really good time and then they get visual proof.
BE MEN AND BE PROUD. TAKE BACK YOUR MASCULINITY. I wouldn't want any of you to lose your jobs so if you go commando learn how to put your penis down your leg or to your side....... and if you work with children wear a jock strap. It's underwear but has a sexy feel to it. I deal with adults so I don't worry about such things...... I do own jockstraps..... but only for play.
Good luck Rajiv. Whatever the outcome work for a much better sex life.
I like your answer to Rajiv and want to learn more about edging. Unfortunately, although I'm a registered user I can't see your profile.
Slip, now that we're friends you should be able to see my profile. If not I'll write you a short note including my various exploits that lead me here. Try to get in touch. Also, tell me more about yourself.
control