Midlife Crisis: The Signs

When we think of midlife crises, we might think about people stupidly buying expensive new cars or engaging extramarital affairs. Some people do exactly those things, of course, but what are the deeper signs of a midlife crisis? If you are playing with these thoughts more often than you'd like, to the point they're really starting to mess with your life satisfaction and daily functioning, you might be dealing with one. 

• You are looking back at your life and feeling that you made detrimental choices you'll never be able to fix, now. 
• You are hit by the terrifying realization that your youth is now well and truly behind you, and as time goes on, your own mortality becomes ever more clear and relevant. 
• Existential questions — who am I really, is this all, what's the point, will it ever get any better, what happened to my dreams and hopes? — really bother you right now. 
• Nothing seems to excite you any more. 
• You are scared of the future. 
• The daily drag is really getting to you, reinforcing your sense of boredom, demotivation, and fatigue. 

Yep, That's Me — What Now?

While the midlife crisis was never a diagnostic category and it's looked at, increasingly, as a normal part of human life, one that marks a very real transition to a new stage, you can still get therapy if you feel the need to. Hey, it's better than putting that Mercedes on your credit card or playing with Tinder! 

Regardless of whether you think therapy is for you or not, and regardless of what you want to call this existential questioning of middle age, now's the time to reevaluate your life.

While Lucile doesn't have the answer yet, plenty of others have emerged from this stage of life to feel content once more. They got there by taking a long, hard, look at what they really want to live for, and taking steps to make it happen. Some of their answers include:

• Going to college to start a new career. 
• Cutting back on their working hours, sometimes because their partner is also returning to work after kids fly the nest. 
• Pursuing an all-consuming hobby. 
• Starting a business. 
• Finding joy in the presence of grandchildren. 
• Traveling. 
• Volunteering. 

READ Understanding Depression: When Feeling Sad Is A Sign Of Mental Illness

The good news is that midlife crises do subside with soul-searching and time, and you can come out the other side feeling content and even excited again. Now that you are older, you're likely able to engage in some of the things you really wanted to pursue when you were younger, but couldn't due to lack of time, financial concerns, and family responsibilities. The key to moving forward with satisfaction is figuring out the answers to all those existential questions, and then acting on them.