Anxiety and depression for days after binge drinking

I am not going to go into too much of my history and suffering. To know it, all you have to do is read other peoples posts and that explains me!! This anxiety - depression - panic - fear - you name it.... is horrible. I started a few years ago seeing signs and felt that alcohol might be contributing to it but, as others, I brushed it off. Now the symptoms are worse, more frequent and longer lasting. As some others have also said, 'the symptoms will appear sooner also...'. I had a few Gins last night and this morning, the FEAR has returned. Horrible anxiety and racing thoughts. Can't stop them. Feels like I am going nuts. Also feels like someone else is controlling me. I guess I have to stop drinking completely although I constantly talk myself out of the fact that drinking IS the problem. It's amazing how much "better" I feel when I drink. No anxiety, no problems, no stress just relaxation. I know the alcohol is just masking the situation but... Good luck to all. Stupid update - I wrote the above this morning. I went out for an early dinner and was feeling better so guess what stupid did? Had a few beers with dinner. I am my own worst enemy.

I am so glad i found this website. These posts couldn't be more accurate to how I feel after I binge drink. I thought i was alone and crazy. Just knowing that other people go through this makes me feel so much better. It is weird though, I am in a transitioning point in my life stressing out about school, getting ready for college, dealing with my family, maybe this has something to do with it to. I used to not have this problem at all. I love drinking in a non-alcoholic way, hopefully I dont have to give it up because of this stupid problem.

It is nice to know I am not alone. It is hard for me to consider that I have a problem, because I am normally very responsible and stable. I am successful in school, so I always assume that if I have success in that part of my life, I can do whatever I want in other aspects (bad theory). I don't drink much during the week, Friday and Saturday I tell myself I deserve to let loose. This weekend I drank on Friday night, then woke up Saturday and started drinking at about noon with friends, and continued until after midnight. I know nothing bad happened to me last night, but its the same story. I wake up this morning depressed and incredibly anxious about everything I said and did. And mostly just anxious about life in general. I tend to let loose every frustration that I have with people when I drink, so I am commonly rude, bitchy, and start fights. I test my relatiionships with the people closest to me. The anxiety is terrible, and I always get very shaky (is shakiness common for everyone else?). I tell myself that I hate myself and am incredibly lonely. I just don't feel like my normal self. i can't feel normal even around family and friends. and I know that the feeling will go away maybe tomorrow or in a few days. And come next weekend, I will be out of this funk and want to go out again. I constantly tell myself that I know I don't need to drink to blackout levels, because I know that I personally can't handle it. And drinking is just so accepted. But after my first or second drink, I just can't STOP thinking about the next one. Stopping drinking to me just sounds like such an outlandish and boring thing to do. I am going to try to limit myself to no more than 2 in any situation. Isn't it weird that even as I type that out, I feel like it is an incredibly hard task? Good luck everyone, you really aren't alone.

I get so hammed, wake up the next day, and have no idea what happened. Last week I woke up and i had bruises and blood all over myself, the friend I had been drinking with and myself apparently both blacked out and started fighting one another. The next day cause neither of us could remember, a friend that was sober who was breaking us up told us about it. I am sure anyone could picture the sheer horror of waking up in this drunken state with bruises and a bit tung and soar all over. Anyway in order to avoid the anxiety and hang over I shot back a fourty of Jack Daniels with another person I know. I have no idea where I am going with this, seems to me like half the ppl I know say that I am a retard and the other half (probably the ones that get too f**ed up to rememeber) always encourage me. I have a love-hate relationship with drinking. It gives me butterflies in my stomach for like 4 days after drinking. I saw a doctor he told me to get more fibre in my diet. I also drink coffee which makes my stomach feel funny too. I started drinking like mad when I was in high school and made an *ss out of of myself all-during. I have straightened my life up a lot, honestly though, my life feels like it is missing something without booze.

Hi- just read that post, , good point-"Without booze it feels like there is something missing in my life" ..To be honest, thats the wrong way around, ....to be truthfully you drink because there is something not right about how you feel about your life...you shouldnt have to find it at the bottom of a bottle........God I am such a hypocirt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay....me feeling realy depressed and am thinking also...I want a drink!!!!!!!!!!Just bee to my friends house. She has to be about the only perosn thats ever said the hardest but brightest thing to me........For such a clever person you are being such a stupid girl...and ......he doesnt love you, (Ie) If he did he wouldnt treat you like this....break the cycle for you and your children. My conversation was Id never let ym children live like this , and how could my family think it ok for me to live like this ....though you cantblame others for drinking and for being a complete @@@@@@ , and I cried been crying all morning. But I guess I am irroring my life and this is not acceptable for my childre, Theyve not yet seen mum and dad physically fight ...yet ( but they know something not right) I watched my mum and dad physicall fight, I watched my mum stand and shake with a meat knife in her hand, and dont know what my dad was thinking at the time but he picked a vase up...they were shouting and screaming and throwing things at each othe. then my mum would loose my dad hed leave...she had an affair...hed forgivere her, come home...mum would faint with relief that he was back ..Theyd do it over and over and over...I even watched my mum try to drive him down. My mum even used me a sa tool to get him back ,,,,just so they could do it to each other over and over again....... When 11 I had an op....I was really scard about what was happening at home.....and everything.!!! i thought theyd do it then,....they did not..... Even when they split ...it didnt get better...dad met someone else who was a cmplete psycho and theyd still fight. Mum went the opposite way. Met a really nice wealthy man and we lived in a big lovely house and she became Mrss Perfect......butshe didnt though because she thought setting responsiblitiy , settting standards and what have you was snogging your new partner or big heavy petting show sin the liveing room....and then the childrne no being heard...Well thats how I saw it..................... Anyway, what I am saying is it didnt get better because I could never adapt to alll the different enviroments, i cant getmy head around what I have to do now,,,,but I certainly would never wish my childrne to live this life. So I have to get out. It hurts like hell. I have my housing appplicatin in front of me. hes still in bed clueless to what Ive been up to, but I have to do this now. Its ben over 2yrs since crying to friends and doctors about this, I have to do this.......My friend even asked why I ahd given up on my teaching etc............I dont kno....and all this a....all this...makes me ant to drink more...I cant deal with how I feel about my babies and what Ive got to fdo , nevermindwhat I had hoped this would be like, rather than what it islike...Now I am waisting my time waffling on herer, trying to avoid fillling out an application..Stupid cow.I have been areally stupid cow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so fed up of hypocits!!! We all have vices, shopping, chocolate, afairs, heorine, cocaine, alcohol, weed- everybody does something at some point in their lives....none of us are perfect. But god, I am fed up of this..no one understands...i cant be bothered even trying.....theres so much going on in my head....and yeah I live my sister, and have a laugh, but at the same time, its not doing me or my children favours. Pf!!!! The other thing is ...its usual for me to feel this way...I mean I use to drink so much more and smoke weed..I used to stay p all night drinking cider and blackcurrant, and I used to go to my student uni ( middle of the day and catch up with the alkie) I am one- no denying it..ibelieve I have no real good reason and feel shame but thre is more to it than that. Anyway, not that anyone cares, I dont believe anyone cares. No ne gives a damn, not even specialists. You drown in your own juices,,, and if thats what you want...then so be it..especially privately.

I must say, screaming out for help ..thats me, but in the same not, theres something more gong on! Look, my point is, is this....as a child I was very insecure....my mum hated me from the day I was born, now she hangs around me, and yeah I addore mymum, I hate the thought of being without her, but I find her really incredibly insensitiv to my needs.For instance, "Your aunt would be ashamed of you" What , sorry my aunt was the one that said I was pretty and clever and kept me going throwout my teens. I nearly lost both my mum and siter ina really nasty car accident ( which I witnessed on my school bus) the teenager, craig ..well his dad was a police officer, and Craig got help for them . My friend Craig is now dead. he commited suicide as he was gay and a prison officer and was accuse dof obsene things. Hes dead due to bastards and hypocrits. Reflecting on things, i could never deal with any of it. My aunt died nto long after my mums car accisdent, I really miss her. really miss her..I think about her alll the time...the way she spoke her loving words in my ear...she couldnt have children due to her husband, I cant but help think he killed her. i find my uncle the most disgusting man Ive ever met..I am not oign to go into detail ...but I truly hate him...he was not blood, just a f death door. My poor aunt. I am really angry at my mum for saying such thing...Like, "Your aunt would be so dissapointed at you for not going to his wedding" What? if I was so close to my adopted tragic junky of a cousin, he would have invited me himself( but then again he apparently knows nothing about it) This guy who I was once close to as in he protected me, was a creation of ill beliefs. he did hit and runs, shoplifting, he also was pulled out of tmy favourite Loch , on the BBc news and accused of manslaughte, of killing his best friend..I dont think hed do such a thing, In fact I think he was trying to rescue him, but why would I wnant to go back, and anyway, regardless of my history I am trying to get me better, not worse, But than again my mother does not understand adddictin aor any of it, let alone listne to em. Shes watched me howl over my situation , scream about my past unluckky indurances, but shes never actually grabbed me by the ear and dragged me out. S o iam doing that to myself. I hopr to god, or do I ? that my doc does not put me in rehab- I have a suspicion and may cancel my appointment ..on the othe rhandId quite like to see a psychiatrist and see someon who could give me a quick think hard nad believe in self respect session.. but I know to well what its about, and I dont know what to do. I just need a beak!

Started that drug and feeling really weird. More like I am going to faint....In a bad mood , but more myself in a bad mood 9 ie) keeping it to myself. Im reallys scared I cant do this. this is my last chance really...In teh back of mymind I am saying its only for a week ...then I can have drink...its not like its 2 months /( months 3 yrs..but \i shouldnt be thinking like that?? The people that know me. Know that I am more not myself if I am not drinking than if I am ( if you get me) . When I dont drink I cant really talk to people and a more of a sad woman than anything....When I drink I know I can have a laugh ( thats inevitable) When I drink I know Ill feel like rubbish ( but I feel like that anyway) and at least when I drink i talk. What Ive done to myself is bad though. Now I feel guilty for drinking and having children. What kind of mum am I? Keep getting really odd pains in my head tooo. I dont know how I am going to do this!!!! :$ 8-| Ok, Illl buy a few book. Just so fed up...and kids...finding them really hard todeal with. Partner hes still drinkng, and he been very quiet. I feel really guilty for what Ive done now. I mean I still think deep down I am scared to say goodbye...really scared, ...on that note love can be bad for us, so maybe its time. I also understand that he is more than likely ill hmself, so maybe iin time I can forgive...Just dont know....what a mess!

i get exactly where youse are comin from. i drank like a demon in my teens and early 20's and got hang overs but now i go into seizure after a good ol' binge. the anxiety is horrific. i'm only 28, i had my first hang over seizure 4 yrs ago. so i would warn anyone who is experiencing extreme anxiety of what could happen. i still drink, i love drinking, but it just kills me. with my first seizure i received a compression fracture to my spine, which will give me pain all my life. i have found that valium and similar drugs help, but are not given out whilly - nilly. i doubt that there is any solution, but to stop drinkin, but in the vague hope that anyone knows any remedies or miracle cures- shout me.

I am so scrwed!! iwas talking to my aunt tonight...My oRTNER ..WELL.HE GOT THE LETTER..when I read it,first..theguilt, the torment......but hey....I.didit for reasone...and mums no support(in the ay I need)....I needed to recollect on just a few things....right 1...is Iam stillemotionallly involved,regardless,..2nd......he now knows i am extrely serious...3rd..why talk to parents about anything?.............4th is.I know I amdoing the right thing~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~But, how the helll and why would I want alife long history of benefits?????????????????????????????//I need a career,though my condience is shot to bits..I need a career.............and where do I begin( shes oky, she cNNOT SEE OR HEAR BUT HEY SHES OK....BUT REGARDELSS OF ANY HANDICAP- i want to be able to wrtie my groundings ( before I die0 0 I WRITE THIS HEREBECAUSE ( ALTHOUGH MY AUNT IS DEAD) SHE TOLD ME i WAS MORE THAN SIMPLY "A ROK OF ART" AND SHE WAS THE ONLY PERSON TO SAY 'KEEP IT SECRET"..i LOVE OU. nOW SHES DEAD///Hey look I thought I was ocer it...You want the truth and nothjing but the turth..well this is what I think..Had she bben alive .( when mygrandad was..sshe well (of coure would have stuck by us) anyway..its not the point..shes dead for a reason..and wee all no why..Aunt rena..I stilltalk toyou...Lot and lots of love KatyXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXxx

I get the same thing too...horrible horrible anxiety... usually after a major drinking binge. I'm going through it right now. I'm just drinking water, breathing, and trying to keep my mind off of every little thing my body feels. I'm hoping the feeling will subside so I can get some sleep, I know my body needs it. I'm getting to the end of my rope with drinking. It seems to be the root of all my evils.

this thread was so enlightening to me. i struggle constantly with the issues of anxiety and depression. literally, it feels like 24 hours a day i am thinking i am going to drop dead, and so i check my pulse constantly, imagine what my body is doing. i think that life is so fleeting, how can i hold on to it? i am constantly wracked by terrors, like what if i suddenly have a stroke, or what i am doing to my body with these negative thoughts, or really anything, if i put my mind to it, can turn into a fear. i have this new thing where i panic if im in a meeting too long with people at work. i drink just about every day. i drink very hard on the weekends, but during the weekdays ill try to have a bottle of wine or a 6 pack of good beer over the course of the evening (maybe 8 to 12:30 am.) i dont feel like this is a huge quantity, and its not liquor ,but its really the only time of the day that i feel good. i finally feel relaxed, my thoughts, even if they touch upon the anxious, do not carry the same fear triggers that they do during the day. i feel like i can handle just about anything when im drinking. i really know that the hangovers are fucking killing me. i had my first panic attack about three years ago after a serious night of booze, cocaine and marijuana. my heart was racing, i thought i was going to keel over and die. its like once i opened that door, i haven't been able to shut it. i still have the same fears. my panic attacks have been episodic, happening for a couple months, etc., then going away. this current episode has been going on for awhile though. the panic attacks seem less frightening but more frequent. the common thread in all this is alcohol. in fact, it's probably safe to say that the common thread in my life is alcohol. my father was is a recovering alcoholic and all my friends are steady drinkers. i am the only one plagued by this fucking anxiety. but when im hungover, i am miserable beyond explanation. i am anxious, i think im going to die, and it causes this depression. the only thing that alleviates it is more alcohol. the problem is that the alcohol FEELS GREAT. if i feel like shit, give me a couple beers and i feel amazing. i know something has to give here. i wake up at 4, 5 am on weeknights because the booze has worn off and i start the anxiety all over again. when im hungover, i have felt with total honesty that im going to have a stroke and die (im 25, in great health.) it is so hard to trade though the evening drinks, the only time i feel good right now. but i have to. i need comprehensive good health. i have a great job, good family relations, strong support group here, my life is pretty good--the only thing fucking it up is me, and alcohol. i feel very disconnected from myself. i constantly wonder how my body is functioning with me doing this to it w/ alcohol. i constantly worry this is my only shot at life and i am fucking it up. when i am hungover these feelings are exacerbated. so am i depressed? am i anxious? or am i an an alcoholic? it seems like it would be tough to tackle all three at once, but i think the alcohol has got to give. it is literally destroying me slowly. if i have to deal w/ this anxiety etc forever i just dont think i can do it. like i said, i am very happy with my lot in life, but the anxiety gives me suicidal thoughts occasionally. as time progresses, i am terrified i will lose my willpower to stay strong in the face of these. giving up alcohol is asking me to give up what i consider my only defense against this terrible anxiety and depression. the only source of emotional joy in my life right now. sometimes its like saying give up my right arm. i do think its killing me though. i feel terrible for a few days after drinking, and then things start to look up. mondays are the worst, because ive been on a bender since Friday. what do you guys think? Like I said, I'm 25, healthy, etc. I've spoken w/ psychologists in the past, tried Paxil, Lexapro briefly, but always came back to the bottle to provide me with the will to get through. I quit doing cocaine after my first panic attack, then quit drugs altogether, with no problem--knowing that I could rely on the bottle to get me through. I feel like since I was about 16 years old, every Friday and Saturday night has been dedicated to getting as fucked up as possible. It's never been just me though--so was everyone around me. Yet I'm the one with the fucking baggage of anxiety and depression now. I guess that's the result of killing brain cells for 10 years. I always had a high tolerance. I try to convince myself I'm depressed, or I'm anxious, independent of the alcohol. That those two items are the issue, and the booze is just a remedy. I tell myself people have drank for thousands of years. I tell myself that all my friends drink like I do, but none of them get like this, so don't blame the booze. Nothing in the world makes me happier than when I'm getting my first buzz after a drink or two. I guess that is an issue unto itself. Without the alcohol, I don't know how I'm doing to deal w/ anxiety and depression, much less insomnia, etc. If I remove alcohol, will my anxiety and depression just go away? Sadly, I think the answer is no. Do I want to start going back to AA? (I had a whopping 3 wks of sobriety in the fall) NOO. Those fucks are so depressing themselves. BUT At the end of the day, I can't keep going like this. I really do think that a year down the road, etc., I'm gonna end up fucking drinking myself to death or giving in to this anxiety and going crazy. I guess I already am slowing doing both. Not drinking seems like a monumental fucking challenge however. I guess the definition of insanity though is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. For 3 years now, searching for mental health, I've avoided addressing my underlying issues with alcohol and hoping this would all blow over. I think I need to start getting realistic. Sorry for the length. Thanks for reading.

It is so great there are forums like this one. I was feeling really crappy all day long after I got really drunk last night. I had to get up early today and finish some very important work. It was like hell. My head was feeling like it was gonna burst and yeah well... the butterflies in the stomach... you get the idea. Now I feel really guilty and sad - I am sure the quality of my work suffered greatly due to my being hungover and really under pressure. I might even lose my job over this. I used to drink every day at age 24-27. Two years ago I stopped, because my GF is not a drinker and I just couldn't stand it to see her suffer with me drinking and being totally wasted half of the time. I usually drink alone or with buddies maybe once a month or once every two months. I know one thing for sure, though, regular binging (like every other day) is the worst thing there is if you're in a relationship. Sooner or later you gotta decide, is it gonna be you GF or binge drinking? One of the two has to go. Although I've made this decision for myself (sorry alcohol :-) ), I still quite often suffer from depression. I'm not taking medication mostly cause I strongly feel it would be dumb for me to exchange one addiction for another. I think - from personal experience - that there's a very strong link between drinking a lot and anxiety/depression. You know, I read somewhere that one thing that ALWAYS accompanies depression is some sleep disorder. Guess what, I ALWAYS get into insomnia the night after the night I am drinking on. Which unfortunately sort of results in more anxiety and more sleeplessness. A vicious circle - which is real hard to get out of. I dunno, I think I'll fight on. So far I've managed to stop everyday excessive drinking. The next step would probably be to tackle anxiety. Or stop smoking. I guess the best rule to follow here is - ONE STEP AT A TIME. I only wish I had the will to go through the steps much faster and that it wouldn't take years for each step :-(

After reading all these posts, including my own most recent, I decided to stop drinking. It is not easy (I drank last night) but I spent the entire week sober and plan on doing the same this week. It is incredible what the sobriety, even in tiny periods of time, does to alleviate the anxiety. As much as I love drinking and the party scene and the raw feeling I get when I have a few beers, it cannot outweigh this anxiety. I literally feel like I'm losing my mind the day after I go drinking. I think that is right now what can help me stop. I cannot keep dealing w/ the next day like this. It is too much. Constantly feeling like youre gonna have a panic attack is enough to make me go crazy. Does this anxiety ever go away???

The anxiety does not go away. I drank since I was 18. For some reason at 21 I started getting the anxiety an panic the day after drinking. ( always had underlying anxiety and depression) I feel guilty, shameful, and like I have hurt those around me. I call and check with people to make sure they do not hate me. For the record, only once have I had someone mad at me. I am now 25 and experienced panic and anxiety today bc I went on a 3 day bender. The day after I feel like I can't move out of bed (too scared), am very clumsy, and feel like I cannot face the world. I take klonopin to help the come down. I am messed up for days. I also get pissed bc others can party, do what they please and be fine. Today, I put in a call to see a therapist. I cannot control my binge drinking and I need help. Good luck to everyone dealing with this. I truly believe that quitting all together is the only answer. It will suck socially but eventually people will stop asking me to drink. I know I shouldn't have to provide a reason but I think I am just going to tell people I am training in the gym or getting ready for a race.