Do you ever get over sexual abuse?

I was sexually abused by my babysitter's 3 brother, from the ages 3-9. They treated me like a object for their sexual needs and sometimes I have nightmares that the babysitter allowed the abuse.
Now I'm 20 years old and the memories still hunted me everyday. I'm scare of getting close to people emotionally, a lot of self blame,I feel uncomfortable being in the same room with me and have never dated nor have any close friends.
I haven't told anyone about the abuse, there were times that I felt extremely suicidal and think about leaving a letter for everyone. But deep inside I don't want to give up and let those people control my life. I prayed, whenever those suicidal thoughts arise and asked God to help me.
Now Im slowly making progress through a lot of self help and praying.
what happened to us is terrible and it is very easy to get stuck on the mindset of self pitying. But this will only hurt ourselves and give more power to the abuser.
Tried to stay positive, it will only show how strong we've become. We have power to shape our future, from today onward!

The first time I was abused, I was seven-years-old. The woman was my father's mistress and when I told him about the abuse (she was naked from the waist down and when she was not fondling me, she was fingering herself and trying to stick her fingers in my mouth) he did not believe me. Worst still he accused me of trying to ruin his thing with her and proceeded to beat me for telling lies. There were other sick animals of course, one tried to abduct me off the street, another tried to groom me between the ages of 10-12, then my one of my girlfriends raped me when I was 13, she was 17. What was the end result of this, I started smoking cigarettes at age 9, started popping pills at age 12, smoking weed at 13, hallucinogens at 16 and finally snorting coke at 20. By the time I was 17 I would often show up to school hung over or still drunk from the night before and my teens to mid twenties was dominated by a string of nasty relationships where I was both a victim and a cold hearted bastard. The one rape that stands out and you won't get specifics so too bad, but this rape was by and far the worst. Without telling too much, it involved 3 women all who took turns in raping me, I was chained to the bed spread eagle so I was completely at their mercy, for most of the rape I had a gag ball in my mouth and to top it off the rape was film by some guy who became aroused at seeing what these women did to me. Long story short because of this rape, I can't stand the sight of blood, vibrators, anything to do s&m and I am fairly certain that one of those women became pregnant as a result of raping me, as I have on many occassions bumped into a teenage girl who looks a lot like me - which leaves to wonder is this girl my daughter? If she is this is all the more painful as my wife and I have tried and failed to have children - So to answer your question, No we never get over our pain. It stays with us, every time we meet someone new we put them through hell because abusers don't walk around with a sign, they look like everyone else. It is absolute misery for women who are raped because of the way they are cruelly judged, but too often I have heard you can't have been raped, you're a guy, which just makes me feel worse. I don't know why I am telling you this... ...maybe I just don't care anymore.

Sorry I forgot to mention that I am also having extreme difficulty in being around my wife. I no longer find her sexually attractive, and have begun to distance myself from her which is affecting our marriage. So we are in November now, the last time I had sex with my wife was at the start of the year and as for therapy, what a joke.

I underrstand your pain i also went through the same thing at the age of 8 to 10yrs am almost 16 but i cant get over it the person that abused me is my mums bro and his still out there not in jail and sometimes his kids come to visit i cant stand his kids i at times want to die and no one has ever asked to find out how am coping not even mum help me please and because of this i now have low blood pressure and i hide in the face of a very social and happy kid when in the actual sense am not

Personally, I was sexually abused as a young girl by my own brother. I am now almost thirty and still feel as ruined as the first day he snuck into my room. He sucked so much from me and I do not know if I will ever feel whole again.

How did you get over this?

I was sexualh aboused for years And years as a child by a family member I m 18 now it stopped when I was 16 and half because he took his own life I have never got over it and finding it so hard I have recently gave my life to the Lord when was 17 but still suffer from anxiety . I belive one day the Lord is going to help me he his doing a work in my life in his time he will make all things beautiful .

Yes, God is our strength. I do not know why some of us have to suffer such horrific abuse but, I do know that if we pray to God for guidance, He will grant us strength to continue. I wish you the best and pray that we all find healing from our days/years of abuse.

Hi, I was abused from a very young age by my grandfather and my so called father and when he stopped abusing me, he started with my sister! No it never goes away. I'm 40 years of age now and every day I blame myself for what happened to my sister! I struggle everyday with how someone should feel in a relationship, i married and that never lasted more than 5 years. I can't sleep properly. I have 4 beautiful children but gave them up because I didn't know how to bring them up! It really doesn't get any easier!

Hi Samantha sorry you went through this I went through this for six years by my mom husband its been 20 and still I fault myself and always wanted to know why I told my mom but nothing happen and it continue.

You can lead a normal life after sexual abuse. It will never be quite the same had it not happen to you. But recovery is different for everyone. Molested by my father and his wife gang raped twice raped by 5 men

can't agree more

I feel the same exact way. I can't love normally either. I'm always mad at myself, my husband. I cannot stop crying. I feel so unworthy. I was molested from the age of 4 until I was 11yrs old. I feel the opposite about sex, I feel that I have to have it all the time and get mad at my husband if he doesn't want sex all the time. I had therapy before but I need it again. I'm 40 yrs old and still have nightmares. I forgave the molester and I told him that I forgave him and he denied it to my face and told me that he made his peace with God and kept it moving. I was so hurt thinking "why forgive?" I have to let God fight my battles and take care of that punk that violated me!!!

I fell this situation a lot, I think you should pray a lot, try to be happy with someone who gives you lot of confidence and affection, a hug and do not give up.

I was abused by my father and grandfather for several years. I been in and out of therapy from the time I was 18. I am now 50 and the abuse still haunts me day and night. I can go weeks without it bothering me but then it fills like I get hit by a bus. I still cannot share my trauma or how it affects me with people it My life. It affects my love life and how I raise my kids. Certain shows and movies give me flashbacks. Certain smalls or touches give me flashbacks. I am a college grad and almost had my masters when I had my first real break down. I am not doing what I want career wise because of the break down. The abuse has and still does impact me grealy but I still have a lot to be happy about. I have a lot to give. And still learning how to receive real love. My kids have helped me to see what real love is like and what it is like to be a child. I live for the moments in my life that give me joy. What was done to me was wrong and it hurts me almost daily but it is not all of who I am. . I have to tell myself this all the time. I do not think I will ever be fully over what I went through but i can learn ways to allow it not to keep taking part of me away. Look at myself and see I was not to blame and I have a right to cry and a right to be happy. For the people that tell me to move on I wish I could fully for get. It is like a nightmare that just never