So I am on day 4 without any alcohol. I have been a drinker for about 30 plus years. Started young and continued while in military. Heavy for about the past 9 years. I always told myself I only drink beer so I wasn’t your traditional alcoholic… Truth is I was. I would drink about 3 cases a week. Binge drinking whenever I could. I have a DUI because of this, I’ve hurt my family because I could not control my drinking (Not Physically but Mentally) missing various important events or embarrassing them when I was drunk. I say 4 days because it is truly 4 days since I last had a drink, but I started cutting back about 2 weeks ago and had suffered many symptoms that have been discussed in this blog. Now I know what I am facing and know that this time is for real. I truly want my life back, I can’t remember the last time I had a good laugh or smiled.
Anxiety is over hard to deal with at times, and the shakes and the feeling of being depressed have scared me a bit. Then I came across this blog which has helped me understand more than I knew before. I have not told my family I am quitting drinking, I want to wait for a week or so I want them to know that I knew I had a problem and I am strong enough to handle it and to show that I was committed, obviously I have tried before to cut out alcohol but always relapsed so I plan on delaying the announcement until I have made real progress.
I lost my Dad to alcoholism as well as many other family members, sometimes I would tell myself that it was in our genes and I can’t change that course. The many nights of guilt after a binge and blackouts were not enough. I want to thank everyone for their input and experiences I know this will help me climb out of this darkness I have been living with for so many years. I realize that I am an alcoholic but that is not enough to just quit, because of the withdrawals. My question is what do you tell yourself mentally when “Just one won’t cause no harm” comes out?
Again thanks to everyone for their comments, I will be using this blog as my motivation as mush as possible.
As for me... I'm 26, I've been drinking hard since I was about 19. Hard meaning 2-7 nights/week, luckily not too much day drinking except for the occasional weekend bender. I've struggled with my alcohol abuse so I can only imagine what it's like for some of you that have been drinking hard for literally decades.
A few years ago I started suffering from what I thought was just anxiety. I now realize that it isn't/wasn't anxiety so much as it is/was alcoholism taking control of me, my body, and my mind. Literally all of the problems that I thought were just "normal person" problems (panic attacks, general anxiety, etc.) I can now attribute 100% to alcohol. Great, fantastic, hooray!
Currently I haven't had a drink for 6 days. I've gone a fair amount of times over the years anywhere between 5-10 days without a drink, but this time was one of the worst -- Mostly because I went on a 5 day bender, including the last 2 days being 14+ hour drinking days before stopping this time.
The first 2-3 days were the worst. With the help of Xanax I made it through the first night, but the second night was almost as bad... I didn't take any pills that night as I think anxiety/panic attacks/emotional instability took enough out of me that I was purely exhausted. Having my girlfriend around helped comfort me a lot too. I'm still having fun with the insomnia, nightmares, and cold/hot sweats even now though.
Strange tangent but I forgot to point this out earlier: being alone doesn't seem to help (at least for me). All that seems to happen is your thoughts start swirling, paranoia takes over, anxiety runs amok, nothing really good I've found. Being with someone close to me (in my case, usually a close female) such as my girlfriend, mother, grandmother, etc, makes it a lot easier and keeps your mind off of all the bad sh!t that your brain just would love you to start thinking about.
Anyway this is really long now. Currently I'm a bartender and server (at two places, no less!) and I don't really know where I'll go from here. I can safely say that I will not be drinking for a good amount of time as I want to see how much better I feel after each day. I want to be able to enjoy alcohol and being intoxicated but without completely abusing it 3-6 times/week, but I don't know if it's possible. I can say that threads like this are refreshing, and it's nice to know that you aren't alone. Thanks to anyone who took their time to either contribute to this thread or to read my post. I'm going to take a Unisom and try to go to sleep!
I work out & eat right and had to quit drinking as it was causing me huge anxiety problems that were starting to interfere & alter my life. Even tho I was a "closet alcoholic & no one knew it the withdawal was worse than anything I could have imagined. As it turns out I had PAWS [post acute withdrawal syndrome]. I went 5-months without a drink & thought "OK that proves I can stop & can have a drink once in awhile as long as I don;t overdue it". Wrong. I quickly started bad habits and had to go through some serious withdrawal again. What I found out was even having a beer or single glass of wine after weeks or a month of not drinking would cause me to start withdrawal symptoms for 2-3 days afterwards & were not pleasant. I'm now of vacation & its tough at times not to have a cocktail or beer on the beach, BUT the bad out-weighs the fun of having a drink at this point. I am starting to get a new life back after approx. 18-months of many after affects of drinking daily for a long time.
So basically I'm found there are no set answers to these questions. Your nervous system has to "reset" when you stop and any stress or lapses of 1-2 drinks seems to be a set-back, which I never thought would be the case. All you need to remember if it WILL stop after some period of time if you hang in there.
Jeff 41 wrote:
My name is Jeff. I have found this website and read from beginning to now.I am on day 5,I will not be drinking anymore.Just a couple of things I would like to say is more willpower to all on here,but in some things I have read is people that start by saying they are on there first week in beginning and then later say they are on day 18,19 or 21 and have slipped or had one beer then comment they are on day 22 or 25,If you have one beer or shot to help them through,you are not continuing on more days ,you go back to 1 day again,even if you only have a sip.You have had a drink ,so you didny stop.I have been drinking since I was 15 and I am 41 now.Its hard but you will get through it.It is one day at a time.You are the one who can no.not anyone else.Stay away from people who drink,and bars.I finally woke up and read all these comments.I didnt goto a doctor.I went to walgreens pharmacy ,bought b1,b12,biotin ,vitamin c,vitamin e,and a case of pedialite.I didnt sleep for 2 first days.I feel better now.the vitamins help alot and the pedialite,one to two liters a day replenishes your system.any drugs your just substitutingone for the other,you need to do it on your own,you need to know what it feels like.and get the effect,so you WONT do it again. Having a beer or two every day is just a excuse to have one and 99% by doing that wont make it,because when you start feeling better,you will start telling yourself,you can have a couple or go out and control it,BS you will be right back here again at square one. Once you realize your an alcoholic,your always a alcoholic.If friends you know offer you a beer say NO,and when they say come on,just one.Ask them do they want to continue being your friend ,and say dont ask me again,because if there gonna offer it they are not your friend. now the vitamins help you and the pedialite,the biotin is a dietary supplement so you dont eat yourself to death.also try to stay away from caffiene,surround yourself with support ,stay positive, and one thing I finally realized was if my body is acting this way from drinking,its definitely not good for you,when your puking and getting sick,you body is trying to tell you stop,Its not good for you. Every person handles stuff in theyre own way.I just hope some of this is helpful,and I will not be returning back to day one...Good luck and i will try to stay updated and be positive...
by the way with the trouble sleeping. Go to pharmacy and you can buy melatonin,Its over the counter and every pharmasist will tell you its the best one out there.And I can say I am proud to be on day 6
Thanks Jeff, I was only 2 days in when I first posted now its day 6...it has physically been getting easier , now I do realize that from here out it is will power...does anyone think it's a good idea to quit smoking ciggarettes now at the same time since things are already rapidly changing wouldn't it be wise to kill two birds with one stone or could that be a recipe for disastear....? anyhow, feeling confident and proud.. strangely I actually feel like my young son is already acting differently around me and that is all the motivation i need. good luck everyone...
J
jeff 41 wrote:
Jeff 41 wrote:
My name is Jeff. I have found this website and read from beginning to now.I am on day 5,I will not be drinking anymore.Just a couple of things I would like to say is more willpower to all on here,but in some things I have read is people that start by saying they are on there first week in beginning and then later say they are on day 18,19 or 21 and have slipped or had one beer then comment they are on day 22 or 25,If you have one beer or shot to help them through,you are not continuing on more days ,you go back to 1 day again,even if you only have a sip.You have had a drink ,so you didny stop.I have been drinking since I was 15 and I am 41 now.Its hard but you will get through it.It is one day at a time.You are the one who can no.not anyone else.Stay away from people who drink,and bars.I finally woke up and read all these comments.I didnt goto a doctor.I went to walgreens pharmacy ,bought b1,b12,biotin ,vitamin c,vitamin e,and a case of pedialite.I didnt sleep for 2 first days.I feel better now.the vitamins help alot and the pedialite,one to two liters a day replenishes your system.any drugs your just substitutingone for the other,you need to do it on your own,you need to know what it feels like.and get the effect,so you WONT do it again. Having a beer or two every day is just a excuse to have one and 99% by doing that wont make it,because when you start feeling better,you will start telling yourself,you can have a couple or go out and control it,BS you will be right back here again at square one. Once you realize your an alcoholic,your always a alcoholic.If friends you know offer you a beer say NO,and when they say come on,just one.Ask them do they want to continue being your friend ,and say dont ask me again,because if there gonna offer it they are not your friend. now the vitamins help you and the pedialite,the biotin is a dietary supplement so you dont eat yourself to death.also try to stay away from caffiene,surround yourself with support ,stay positive, and one thing I finally realized was if my body is acting this way from drinking,its definitely not good for you,when your puking and getting sick,you body is trying to tell you stop,Its not good for you. Every person handles stuff in theyre own way.I just hope some of this is helpful,and I will not be returning back to day one...Good luck and i will try to stay updated and be positive...
by the way with the trouble sleeping. Go to pharmacy and you can buy melatonin,Its over the counter and every pharmasist will tell you its the best one out there.And I can say I am proud to be on day 6
Thanks Jeff, I was only 2 days in when I first posted now its day 6...it has physically been getting easier , now I do realize that from here out it is will power...does anyone think it's a good idea to quit smoking ciggarettes now at the same time since things are already rapidly changing wouldn't it be wise to kill two birds with one stone or could that be a recipe for disastear....? anyhow, feeling confident and proud.. strangely I actually feel like my young son is already acting differently around me and that is all the motivation i need. good luck everyone...
J
jayjay. I smoke too and decided I would reward myself 1 cig every 8 hrs. I was gonna quit both at same time.But When you get that alcohol craving your gonna need a stress releaser. My goal is after 30 days i will quit.take one habit at a time. choose your own way,I hadnt had a drink or cig in 3 days and started stressing and decided i would giv one up a time but i would only have one when really needed it. so like i said i set a limit of one every 8hrs. that doesnt mean i get a extra cig if i sleep past it. .7 more hours and day 7 for me
Fortunately, I had time on my hands and brains intact enough during the day to start researching this whole thing big time. Every day, hours checking out treatment options, medications, alternative therapies, AA, predisposing mental issues, etc.... What I discovered has changed my live and has allowed me to dodge the bullitt of the withdrawal Hell. In my case especially, as I suspect in yours and many others also, anxiety, depression, perhaps a bit of bi-polar were issues that predisposed me to alcohol abuse. So to treat these underlying mental tendencies was crucial, and something that AA wasn't able to address. All AA had to offer was 1) a fixation on alcohol, and 2) an identity shift. No longer was I a person, but "an alcoholic". This was supposed to be my "new identity". This is pure c**p. While I may (I DO) have a problem with abusing alcohol, I am a person with many other qualities, values, convictions, priorities that lay much closer to the core of my person than "alcoholic". So AA was definitely not for me. Nor is it the answer for many, many others who share my issues and problems.
So what was my answer? Baclofen. Google it. It is amazing. It has given me my life back. I am indifferent to alcohol, not fixated on it. Both AA and abuse want me fixated on alcohol. I refuse that. Baclofen (which is readily available and inexpensive, especially compared to naltrexone, acomprosate, etc) combined with B-complex, milk thistle, lithium orotate (all readily available and inexpensive), combined with a nutritious diet, a little daily exercise, activity, will spare so many from these horror stories on this site. Minimal, if any withdrawals, minimal, if any cravings and a calming, special sense of freedom is what to expect.
Don't believe me? Google the terms. Do the homework. Order the stuff and expect miracles. There's hope friends. Believe me. Thank God.
Discontinuation of baclofen can be associated with a withdrawal syndrome which resembles benzodiazepine withdrawal and alcohol withdrawal. Withdrawal symptoms are more likely if baclofen is used for long periods of time (more than a couple of months) and can occur from low or high doses. The severity of baclofen withdrawal depends on the rate at which baclofen is discontinued. Thus to minimise baclofen withdrawal symptoms the dose should be tapered down slowly when discontinuing baclofen therapy. Abrupt withdrawal is more likely to result in severe withdrawal symptoms. Acute withdrawal symptoms can be stopped by recommencing baclofen.[14]
Withdrawal symptoms may include auditory hallucinations, visual hallucinations, tactile hallucinations, delusions, confusion, agitation, delirium, disorientation, fluctuation of consciousness, insomnia, dizziness, nausea, feeling faint, inattention, memory impairments, perceptual disturbances, pruritus/itching, anxiety, depersonalization, hypertonia, hyperthermia, formal thought disorder, psychosis, mania, mood disturbances, restlessness, and behavioral disturbances, tachycardia, seizures, tremors, autonomic dysfunction, hyperpyrexia, extreme muscle rigidity resembling neuroleptic malignant syndrome and rebound spasticity.[14][15]