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I want to get pregant, but my boyfriend says not yet. He says if I end up pregnant by accident he will be very happy that we're going to have a baby together. He says that he wants us to wait a while so that our families can get used to the idea of us being together and will know that what we have is forever. The problem here is that I think I may already be pregnant, but I don't know how to tell him this. I want to give him the time he needs, but he says not yet and then doesn't want to use a condom. I think maybe he want it to happen but doesn't want to have to take responsibilty for it when it comes to his family who is very religous. Like, he thinks if it doesn't happen on purpose it will be easier to tell his family that it was an accident that to tell his family he didn't include them in our plans to start a family. It's all so complicated and i'm so confused. Can anyone offer any advice/opinions. I need help!!


Although it may take him awhile to get used to the idea you still need to tell him, I know it will be hard but you two will fix it. You two would be great parents and I know he wants his family to approve but thts not always going to happen some times you just have slowly break the news and let them do the rest, they'll eventually get over it. Just tell your boyfriend and figure things out. ~Good luck


It is important to sit down with him and really communicate all of your feelings and desires in this situation and in regards to your relationship. You both must be able to properly, openly and honestly communicate about everything in order to have a happy and healthy relationship.

Are you really ready for the responsability of becoming a parent? Both emotionally and financially?? It will put pressure on your relationships, especially the one with your BF. Having children is expensive, we have just one and I can tell you we live our lives for her.

If you think you may be pregnant already and as you state he refuses to use a condom, you should get a test or two and take them to see. Depending on what that test says will determine which way you need to go. Do not let him play head games with you... the fact that he says he is not ready, wants to get your families on the same page BUT REFUSES to use a condom is a classic mind game and that is not a way to start life together.

So talk to him when you are both alone and calm, be honest with him about everything and ask him how he really and truly feels about everything. Then give him the results of the pregnancy test and use that as an opportunity to begin communicating with your families. To wait and beat around the bush is doing nothing good. Also promise each other that no matter what you will always talk through your problems and find a solution to each issue that arrises...that you will compromise for the sake of your baby and relationship.... that the three of you need to take priority in each others lives.... meaning you three come first before anyone else.

When you talk to your families, assure them that you are ready to take full responsibilty for the care and upbringing of your child. That financially you are prepared for the costs associated with clothing, feeding, healthcare and day care of the baby. That you are both responsible with obtaining and keeping employment to support yourselves and your baby.
In other words, do not give anyone a reason to doubt that you are ready or doubt that you can support yourselves.

If you both talk and he is still saying he is not ready, respect that and get on birth control and do not risk it. You have plenty of time.

Good luck with whatever you decide!