Feelings After Abortion

In addition to all that I wrote I wanted to say everyday that passes is not "easy". I have had moments of regret and tears also.

I had an abortion at 15 weeks exactly 2 months ago and i deeply regret it. There have been nights that I've cried myself to sleep. I've been distant from my family and friends and don't know what to do. I even want to get pregnant again cause i, think i would feel better. I think women react differently based on their situation and their feelings toward the pregnancy.

My girlfriend and I went through an abortion few days ago.  I was supportive of having the child but she didn't want it after careful consideration, so we went with it.  Couple days went by, I spent my spare time cooked and cleaned for her, to make sure she's alright.  And then one night she become distant, cried and wanted to be left alone in the bedroom.I'll find a way to support her regardless of the difficulty, but here's a couple piece of reflection for those who cherish their relationship.

1) It is easy to just say the man don't care about the woman, can't attend to her needs her feelings.  True perhaps, and that's because while you have the capacity to devote 24hrs towards yourself a day, and my limitation is set at 18 waking hours; the other 6 hours are needed for rest to keep the system running everyday.

2) Saying that you care for your partner is simple, but since we are all anonymous lets be honest here; how many of you took 5 seconds of your life and googled "Men after abortion"?

Im 21 years old. i already have 2 kids. Im a great mother to the babys i do have but for some reason i felt like after i got pregnant with the 3rd i could no longer be a great mother. i was lashing out on my poor babys for everything. they would be loud walking into a room and i would scream at them. i would be yelling all day. then we would leave the house and i would put on a fake face. i was extremely angry and depressed.. writing this makes me feel so bad for them that they had to indoor me for 14 weeks like that. i did not want this. i couldn't even call it a baby or anything. the guy i got pregnant by wanted it since it was his first. so then i started lashing out on him. to the point where i just stop texting him back. I wanted this abortion for the first day i took the test. their was no doubt in my mind. but i had ppl pressuring me to keep it. so i soon started doubting myself and would wait longer and longer i soon had the money and did it. at 14 weeks. my kids i have now their father is happy i made that desicion. he did not want me to ruin his kids life by bringing in something i couldnt handle. but he was mad at me for getting pregnant so he wont talk to me about it at all. my best friend is anti abortion. pretty much told me im not you're friend anymore (yeah some friend) my parents don't know. my mom is dieing of a brain tumor so its not like i can just go to her. another big reason i couldn't keep this!! I am very relived and feel like i can finally moved on. but i feel bad that i feel that way? lol i feel like im too happy? everyone is suffereing and i don't care? atleast not now... idk i just wish i could see a story like mine. i got a abortion 3 days ago by the way. i will admit this the one thing that freaked me out was the surgrey part. where they go in and get it. the pain was worse than childbirth and my sedation didnt even work. just made me feel like i was high. not numb. so it grossed me out. but im hoping this isnt a feeling that will soon go away then ill be depressed? i never want my kids to see me like that again!!

I been extra depressed and can't stand to speak to my partner even tho we agreed I'm mixed with emotion and wish things could be different how can I look at my partner with love again?

Hi, I'm very sorry for what you went through. I saw this was posted over a year ago, could I please ask how you are feeling today? Also, what happened with your relationship?

I am sorry for your loss.
the website "rachelsvineyard.org" is an excellent resource for post-abortion healing.

I am sorry for your loss.

the website "rachelsvineyard.org" is an excellent resource for post-abortion healing

I am sorry for your loss.

The website "rachelsvineyard.org" is an excellent resource for post-abortion healing.

I can relate to every word that you have typed. I just had an abortion 1 week ago and my bf (who is 5 years younger than me and never wanted/wants to have kids) is thoroughly relieved. He does not understand that I'm sad and depressed. He just wants us to move on and forget that it ever happened. I don't have anyone I can talk to about this and sometimes when I try to express how saddened, guilty and empty I feel, he gets mad at me for being "emotional". I feel so empty, nothing interests me. The logical side of me knows that this is not the right time and that we don't have the means yet to take care of a child, but I can see my interest in everything weaning. I don't care about my work or my health. All I can say is that I feel hollow and empty. This was my first pregnancy and I was the only one who saw the ultrasound. I cannot get the image out of my head, it hurts so much. I've been putting on a brave face and pretending like I'm fine but it is killing me on the inside.
I just saw that your post is a year old; I hope you are doing better now.

So I got a surgical abortion about a month ago at nine weeks three days. My boyfriend and I noticed that I had odd cravings and a hard stomach and so I took a test and it surprised us both to find out I could have babies. I am 25 years old and currently living with my boyfriend of eight years. He has been with me through all of it. Anyway the reason i was happy and excited was cause last year my doctor told me because of a hormone deficit I couldnt have babies naturally. At first I thought we could keep it so when i talked to my boyfriend I was devastated to find he wasn't happy with the news. He told me financially we couldn't keep it and we discussed having it as well as pros and cons. We talked about not going to school and getting a career in Liu of the baby. So we agreed on it together being we're still in school.

I went in for the procedure with him supporting me and even holding my hand through it all. All and all he was and is a great person and I still love him. I can only think of the overwhelming pain and crying solidly for a week straight maybe more afterwards though and the huge amount of regret. I got a picture of the fetus and every time I looked at it I thought it looked like us. I wondered for several weeks after why if other women, who where less well off as i, could have babies then went couldn't I. Leading to jealousy of pregnant women. I also would stare off blankly at the horizon for another month and not think of anything but what that baby could've been.

I am better but as an artist i feel so very very alone and uninspired by most of life now. Life used to be colorful but nothing seems exciting about life. I have been crying from baby dreams for awhile too when I wake in the mornings. When that happens my stomach hurts really badly and I can't explain the sadness. I don't know what to do. I teach kids to paint and draw but once and awhile a kid says something that makes me sad and depressed.