Hi, I'm hoping I've posted this in the right area, I figured it was better off here than in men's health since girls could possibly relate to this problem too - Sorry, I'm a noob to all this stuff.
I'm a 25 year old gay male, had a pretty active sex life since I was 15, have been in (longterm) relationships, etc etc - so nothing too abnormal going on there that doesn't go on with other gay guys my age.
I've got two problems going on that I've noticed and was just wondering if anyone else has dealt with either of these, and if so, how you got past it?
Problem the first - I never used to have much of a problem with having sex with strangers, however in the last year or two I've noticed an awful feeling of guilt and just feeling like a bit of a lowlife s*** immediately after I cum after having one-night-stand sex. It's all hot and enjoyable at the time, and I'm fully into it while it's happening, but as soon as I cum, I immediately feel like c**p. Also, I used to be able to hang out and chat a bit afterwards, but these days I either want to leave immediately (if I've gone to their place), or I want them to leave immediately (if they've come to mine) - I always dread that they're going to want to stay over. And I mean immediately - as soon as it's over, I just want to get away from them, don't want them to touch me, etc.
I should mention that, strangely enough, I used to sleep around a lot more after my last relationship ended, and felt fine. This has only started happening since I slowed down (I probably only hook up once every six months now, if that, whereas it used to be a couple of different guys a week). I should also mention that this happens regardless of what the sexual activity actually was - whether it's anal, blowjobs, handjobs, anything. And I'm always safe, so it's nothing to do with stressing about catching STD's or anything like that.
Problem the second (possibly related) - I've been single for 4 years now, and find it very difficult to find guys I'm actually keen on (which is a whole other story in itself). Over the last couple of years (again, this is why I'm wondering if they're related), I've noticed that if I do meet someone I'm keen on, regardless of how long we've been dating or seeing eachother, as soon as we have sex, the feelings disappear, and I don't want to see them again.
That was okay at the start, because I figured they just weren't the right guy, but now that it seems to happen every time I'm keen on someone, I'm starting to think there might be a bit of a deeper problem going down. I don't want this to continue, because I feel like I've passed on some really awesome guys just because a switch in my brain seemed to click over as soon as I came.
Hope all of that made sense. Has anyone else (gay, bi, straight, male, female, ANYONE!!) had this suddenly happen out of nowhere before?
Thanks in advance!!
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