Hey Purrrpill! Sorry have been away so long, have been working a lot lately on the road.
I am doing fine, dealing with the back pain naturally for now, but will have to see a doctor soon :(
The only thing I will take from them will be some anti inflammatory medicine, no pain meds for me!
How is your mom doing? I hope she is well!
I'm so glad to hear from you!! Was worried!! My mom is better.......I'm moving. Uggg, I'm upset bout this, but if you remember I was moving day before she fell. My comfy apartment isn't such anymore. I spent six weeks with her like attached to her hip and unfortunately as soon as she was better things just got bad fast. I should not be hurt or surprised. I AM though. Anyways, leaving tom was posed to move in with a "friend" till we started arguing over where I would be sleeping. Im not going to pay rent and be told I have to sleep in bed with someone, so now Craigslist killer style looking for quick place to get in. I usually live alone so this is strange looking for a roommate that I do not know. I'm posed to go to Kansas Sat morning, but don't see how I will be able to go....tickets booked have zero time to move and get to airport.. I'm so f*****g hurt and feel so used like only my family knows how to make me feel. K and I don't even get along because the adults in his life are idiots that don't understand you don't talk bad about important people in his life. Five years I was that kids everything my b***h sister got jealous, and tells him I don't want to see him all this BS. I ran miles barefoot in the snow to catch his dog I can't stand. Went thru hell to get a"Mario" here. Then bam he just started repeating sh*t from his mom......well I can't say what's on my mind about her because it isn't right he is five and has it rough enough as it is. My mother is so consumed with my sister and her tanning, and shopping and couple grand condo and money for her coke and pills she just let me slide right out without helping me. So now I got a day to move a day and a half to get to Kansas and can't pack one thing for either. Sorry didn't mean to consume you with my problems. I was so worried bout you!!!!
sh*t, forgot to come back sooner and say I feel alot better I'm over my little pitty party, I'm going to go to Kansasfor the weekend and have fun. I hate flying!! Lol, I'm moody huh...
So sh*t isn't all candy and rainbows but I know it's better than sitting on st. corners waiting on DD's. Georgia scared to fly.....Hope you are good!!! And I hope the back pain lets up!!!
Have a safe trip, and have fun!
Thank you and i will try!!!
I just read Georgia Shakes post. Wow it hit home. I always read the forums but never talk. I am so scared and worried to start this journey..Tomorrow will be day 1 with no percocets morphine or vicodin. I havehad a little today but having a hard time. My legs hurt like crazy y stomach is cramping head hurts sweating, i really want to crawl out of my skin. I go to a suboxone doctor tuesday and he says I need to be in withdrawl before the subox will work. OMG I am dieing and it has not been 24 hours.
You can make it! It is worth being sober, the drugs take some much from your life, its hard to realize how much.
Hang in there!
Hang in there!
Georgia, how are you???? I made it back from kansas, but in Baltimore tore like meniscus behind my knee. I got rid of the script in the er. I just hope it heals and I don't need surgery. It hurts BAD. Georgia how do you make peace with someones ghost?? And if anyone has a natural cure for my knee please!!!! Good luck Scared!!! iI realize I idolize a dead person and how can I be happy doing so. I'm ready to make peace I know I have to just not hold on so tight. I watched Amelia last night last movie we watched(I slept thru). I know in some way I'm protecting myself by doing this and there is something inside me that won't let him go......i would like to make peace like you said just do not know how.
Hmmm, Maybe I didn't post it right. Georgia how are you???? I tore my meniscus behind my knee and it kills!!! I thru the script out in the er a few hours ago...errr, It happened flying home stupid layover in Baltimore. I really wanted to ask you how do you make peace with someones ghost? It is time I'm holding onto someone who isn't exactly here.....Is this to protect myself in some way. Did I just love him so much I'll always be this broken hearted? Is it a defense mechanism to keep other people out. Where is he??? How did you do it?? I hope all is well. And Scared good luck!! You got this.
LOL or I posted it twice differently.
Well Hi, here I am AGAIN. Every fkn month same sht. Been 6 days no frikn pills, my "hookup" doa. Od'd. I couldn't finkd katrom, bud did cop a script for gabapentin(works miracles) but ofcourse ran out yestterday. It did help with sleep, rls add immodium and it was great. Went to workk. Hope you all had a great easter. Sometimes we don't know our strenght tiill put thru it. Took last dose Sat night, all but drwsy and sneezing was subdued.a tiny bit of rls until lastnight when a ran out of gabapentin. I'm so so tires of being a slave to a pill smaller than a period, but every every damn month Vila. Another song, country "if your going thru hell,keep on moving, don't slow down, and the devilwont even know your there". Just wanted to drop in and say, YES HERE I AM AGAIN, AND LOVE YA GUYS. <3 THANKS FOR EVERYTHING.
I hope you feel better. It does suck being in that cycle. I'm glad your back. Sorry your dd od'd. That's what happens huh. I'm glad you always come back. How was your Easter. Mine was terrible lol. I finally broke the cycle and it still is not fun, but somethings are. And it is better than the other option. I'm up cause I'm in so much pain right now, but I know I can't take anything for it. I take any opiate it isn't good. Suboxone which I don't advocate did help me for a lil. Ct'ed them with little physical probs. I was not on them long at all though. Actually the detox to that sucks too, but if it is that or street using I say go with that. Maybe this time you will stay round a little bit. Either way no matter what please continue to check in. I like the country song "I pray for you" and" I hear voices" random....I like alot of country no idea why those came to mind. If you can't sleep and want to chat I'm up. I wish you the best!!
My computer is being wierd AZ where did our messages go. Watch they show up.
Thanks Purplepill. Sorry to hear about your Easter. Mine was working going thru wd's. Ha. I only have my mobil so I have to scroll thru, takes about an hour. I feel ya on the pain. That's one reason I got hooked. I didn't realize my body had become dependant until I ran out and found you all. Its something I don't wish on my enemy. like I said, I've never crossed the line to H. And I pray that I don't. I used to think, how could anybody ever shoot up, that's soo disgusting. I haven't ever, but I know now. I don't know how you broke the cycle, I'm not strong enough yet. Between the cysts in my hip, arthritis in my feet and back pain, and hell I'm only 40. But were all in this hell together. THANKS PURPLPILL AND GEORGIASHAKES