I did not get a notification again!
I am not sure what you mean by "how to get around this". Do you mean you don't know whether your hymen is intact, even though you are a virgin (never had sex), or you are not a virgin (had sex)?
Here is a picture of a typical hymen, but this one is obviously Caucasian:
http://www.soc.ucsb.edu/sexinfo/sites/default/files/files/styles/large/public/field/image/hymen_virginal.jpg
But there are variations. Here are diagrams of different types of hymen.
http://www.soc.ucsb.edu/sexinfo/sites/default/files/files/styles/large/public/field/image/v2.jpeg
I hope these pictures help. I will try to look for a reply, but the site's notification system does not seem to be working properly. Private messaging might be a better option.
Do you have someone you can trust completely who could look for you?
I wait to get a response from you.
However, not all hymens rupture on first sex. Some hymens are tough and elastic and so stretch a bit. If the penis is not big, then it can enter without rupturing the hymen, and so would not cause bleeding.
However, if you can establish that your hymen is intact, you could invite your husband to visually inspect you, and ask him, just prior to intercourse, to see that your hymen is intact, then that might be enough to convince him that you are indeed pure.
You said "the only person I can trust cannot look". Who is that person, and why can't that person look?
What country are you from? What culture/race/religion? Is it that the images are not clear enough, or that they are of a Caucasian (white) person and you are not that makes determining the state of your hymen difficult? What did you see when you looked? If you saw a partially covered vaginal entrance, the likelihood is that is was your hymen. Why do you think it might not be intact?
I hope this helps a bit more.
When I looked I couldn't determine if it was my hymen because all of it was the same colour and I notice something in the vagina that is round.
If my husband visual inspects me and I do not bleed there is still a chance that the believe I am not virgin because where I come from everyone thinks you must bleed the first time and if you do not that means you have had sex in the past.
Yes, it is true that gymnastics/sports/bicycling can cause the hymen to rupture, but not necessarily.
Inserting your finger would not necessarily break your hymen if not done roughly. The hymen usually has a finger-sized hole in it to allow the menstrual flow to exit your body. What did it feel like when you inserted your finger? Was it tight? Did it just fit in?
Yes, it is all the same colour. The round thing you saw in your vagina might be your cervix. It is at the far end of your vagina, and is the entrance to your uterus (womb):
http://img.webmd.com/dtmcms/live/webmd/consumer_assets/site_images/media/medical/hw/h9991284_001.jpg
I realise that many people believe that you must bleed the first time, but it is not so.
I believe you when you say you are still a virgin. Do you know whether your husband-to-be thinks that way?
On the assumption that your hymen is already ruptured, I suggest that you put a tiny piece of dried blood-soaked cloth inside your vagina on the wedding night, just prior to first intercourse. It would then make a show of blood from the warmth and moisture of your vagina.
I hope this helps some more.
If I use the blood cloth will he be able to notice or feel it ?
Also, thank you so much for all your help and time. I appreciate it very much.
The cloth should not need to be large, but whether he notices it depends what you do that night. If he fingers you first, he might feel it, but I suspect he will just want to penetrate you first. Have you talked about exactly what will happen the first time?
I suggest you empty your bladder before sex anyway, and excusing yourself for that gives opportunity to insert the very small piece of cloth. After the first penetration, excuse yourself again to either urinate, or to wash yourself, and that gives opportunity to dispose of the cloth. Dousing with cold water after sex can reduce the chance of cystitis, so is a good idea anyway.
I am pleased to be of any help I can.
I hope so too. When are you getting married? I would like to hear how you get on.
You can check the state of your hymen by using a hand-mirror.
Do you know what you are looking for?