My husband hit me once and he has anger problems.

what i feel is that if u r born a girl, its the worst thing ever... a guy who beats his wife is not a man.. shameless... i also cry everyday... i hve never thought abt leaving the relatioship till now..but now i really feel... they hve 2 get for this... God will show them..

Nothing works. My husband always hit me & when he start he can't stop hitting, From 1997 I had a worse problem. I had intervention order, he lived separate for 3 months,he did counselling as well, Still nothing change. He is same. I think problem will solve when they will realize its their mistake. They need to change. Otherwise nothing can be changed. I don't have courage to live separate. If you have please move & live separate, that's best for you.

I have been married for more than just an year.. We dated for arnd 3 yrs.. Just after marriage he startd beating me.. he loves me btthn sometimes in an arguemnt he gets so angry.. Today also he gt so angry.. He hurt me so badly just few hrs bak. My whole body pains.. My eyes r swollen.. My upper lip is swollen.. He used a leather belt.. Thr r marks all over my body.. I m in so much pain right now that i dnt knw wt i m writng.. :'(

GO TO THE HOSPITAL. GET MEDICAL HELP AND TELL THEM WHAT HAPPENED. THEY WILL GET YOU THE PEOPLE AND CONTACTS YOU NEED SO YOU WILL NOT BE IN DANGER.

you should immediately proceed for divorce because there is no solution for it.Till now you have no kids ,so you can think of it but once you have kids you are really stuck.You have to think for your child also that itme.So best thing is to get rid of it.

My husband hit it's like yours I guess he hit me today this has not been the first time he has done it in the past he says that I don't know to talk , and slaps me hard , he watched my daughter cry when he hit me then he carried her away from because he was feeling bad that he hurt her . His anger is uncontrolable , my face and body hurts and most of all my heart

I feel as if I am telling the story. My husband is the same way. We all tip toe around him not knowing how to respond to him. Today I asked him about a woman flirting on FB and he dragged me by my hair across the room smacked me called me lots of names and then smacked me some more. He used to hit his ex so I know it is him not me. I wish I had the strength to leave him, I know better. He is not my first husband but I am so scared of him I just stay.

I am an Indian woman married to an Indian man  and living in India. We have been married for 8 years, we have two children. After we had children I stopped going to work and am staying at home. I think all you guys are so lucky because you have the option of leaving your abusive spouse. Think about people like me living in some corner of the world abused and harassed verbally and physi cally everyday and has no option of leaving or a better life. My husband hits me with his slippers and is now threatening to hit me with his boots from now on because I answered him back when he started his usual hobby of verbally harassing me. I have a beautiful and smart daughter and I fear her future will also be the same. People like us have no hope.

 

Guest wrote:

Kelly1813 wrote:

My husband has hit me numerous times always when we've fought about something silly. He's European and thinks that because he didn't punch me, he just slaps and hits hard, that it's normal and I hit him too so we're even. I have only hit him in defense or retalliation. I don't know what to do about this? Today we're not speaking to each other. His mood changes from day to day too. One day he loves and adores me and when we fight he swears and says the most incredibly cruel things to me. What should I do?

Kelly,

Wow I feel like you have just read my mind and written it all on paper for me. My husband is exactly the same. One minute he idolises me, the next he's hitting me and throwing things at me. Yesterday he threw a mug of coffee in my face and then threw the mug and cut open my leg. Its the second time he's hurt me and I thought I made it clear by moving from New Zealand back to the UK to get away from him that that behavior is unacceptable. I feel like I'm crazy holding onto hope that things are going to work out. There are two breeds of men, those who hit and those who don't. I think I'm going to put aside the love i feel for him and go in search of a decent man. Don't we all deserve that?!

I currently have this problem myself and don't know what to do. I really love my husband and most of the time feel very lucky to have him since he treats me so well but when he gets very angry everything changes... My husband is German and had a very abusive father and also grew up in an abusive kids home in east Berlin. I still don't think this should be a legitimate excuse for the things he does to me sometimes. When he gets angry enough he will either punch or slap me so hard I hit the floor (also I am very thin) or he sometimes will grab my hands and twist and bend my fingers until they break or dislocate. All of this has been done on purpose while he is completely sober except once he beat me when he was very drunk and could not remember it afterwards. My whole face was bruised and swollen that time. He also threatens to send letters to the court in charge of the custody battle over my daughter and tell them what a terrible person I am and he will make sure I never get her back. When he is not angry he is wonderfully loving and attentive so how do I make sense of this man I married and still love?

Dear Maya alias whosoever,
I am an Indian woman too and know Indian society well. And yes I know how Indian men are. My mother had gone thru a lot in initial years of her marraige, then lot of other women I know are going through a hell. But they can't move out as that will be more difficult for them than to stay with a man who claims that he loves his wife yet can't control his temper and you know what's the exact problem is. We let them do that. There is a solution too all problem so why don't you find one. Please rebuild your confidence. Do something try to stay healthy fit and happy. And forgod sake stop believing that what u r going through ur daughters will go through the same. They won't . U ve to teach them how to be independent emotionally and financially. Most important of all how to choose the right partner for their life. And most important thing is where to draw the line. I won't say talk to ur husband or go for counsellor as I know u might be trying that and it may not be working. I would rather say detached urself with ur husband as u cannot leave him. Don't get into argument at all. Just treat him like a cash cow. And at the same time do things which u like. Just get busy in framing ur children's future. And if things goes beyond tolerance than Indian laws are very much favourable towards women. Trust me the law will make the man pay all for his deed. All the best

in the last 7 years of my marriage my husband has hit me thrice. we have 2 great kids. my husband is 80% good like someone wrote . he tries to apologize after hitting me and loves me i suppose . but after all this hitting i am losing hope . does he really love me? i dont know what to think . forgiving seems difficult. my children also love their dad dearly. all these two times he hit me because i provoked him. but still he should not have hit me . i dont feel loved now . the last time he hit me was yesterday because i jokingly punched him and he thought i was angry. but iwas not.

 

Ok I do not know what religion you are butall I have to say honey is to leave it in GODS hand. Now from the looks of it you need to to get out of there and take a break. But don't officially break it off because I am assuming since you married him he did not act like this when it all started. Now go to counseling or talk to a pastor constantly and see the progress he makes. Now if your husband makes no progress than you need to leave him. But if you see that he is improving then you need to give him all you got and try to work it out. Now also coming from someone my age (22) and also not married yet but soon to be hopefully anyway that full time job there is probably also the problem. Now you say the relations part of your relationship is not doing good well maybe its that job. Now take a few hours off or a day off every week and make that ya'll day. This is also why he is getting moody. You might say to yourself why is a Baptist Christian 22 year old non married virgin telling you this. Well this is my response the relationship that I am in now is the part right before the ring its the really getting deep down and able to trust each other. Mind you we are not married yet but when we are I know i'm not going to let him go a couple of days without intimacy because that is a really strong think that also plays a factor in keeping a good marriage. Also pray with him and you pray by yourself everytime you get a chance. Do all these things and I hope it works out for you.

Your marriage is young as are you so time will heal any wound. I hate to be the one to tell you now to leave but I have been in a marriage like this for 22 years. Why I stayed I can't tell you, so many obligations including kids that they came before me. Dont' waste your life like I did and so many others as well. I know you love him but you need to learn to love yourself. You mentioned that your family offers strong support, lean on them and look within yourself to see whether this man is more important than your happiness.

I got married 1 and half years ago and have 10 months old son. Whenever my husband gets angry he beats me, kicks me on stomach and chest and throws me to the wall and strangles me so badly. But still I love him so madly that I cannot imagine of moving away from him. what shall i do ? Ours was a love marriage after 2 years of love. He was such a wonderful guy but now when I ask him about the change in his character, he says this was his originality. I loved him truly so much but now I feel that he does'nt love me at all. There is no way I can think of moving away from him. Yesterday night I was hit so badly I am unable to move my elbow, my back bone aches and my stomach pains and I have blood clots all over my body. He takes alcohol and hits me with all his power. I don't think I can take his beatings and survive anymore. I will surely die if I am kicked again.. He gets so angry that I just see a LION in front of me.Why don't GOD give me back my husband as the way I saw him. I love him madly... I am crying.. Why doesn't he feel my love. He doesn't love me or my baby anymore. He is asking me to move away from him... I feel so orphaned.. please help me with a solution.

prayer to GOD n he wil help u