Wow, people like me! I find it a total turn off to have my nipples touched and I am completely grossed out when my husband sucks on them. I can't wait to wipe the saliva off. Just thinking about it makes me feel gross right now. What bothers me even more is he knows I am completely grossed out and does it anyway. It ruins sex for me.
I'm going to guess the reason for everyone has nothing to do with any repressed memories of anything bad in your life but that your nipples/breasts are very sensitive and the touching is just too much and unpleasant. Just like the way I have sensitive teeth and eating ice cream hurts.
Wow, people like me! I find it a total turn off to have my nipples touched and I am completely grossed out when my husband sucks on them. I can't wait to wipe the saliva off. Just thinking about it makes me feel gross right now. What bothers me even more is he knows I am completely grossed out and does it anyway. It ruins sex for me. I'm going to guess the reason for everyone has nothing to do with any repressed memories of anything bad in your life but that your nipples/breasts are very sensitive and the touching is just too much and unpleasant. Just like the way I have sensitive teeth and eating ice cream hurts.
No real studies have been found for this problem. Despite the fact that it is actually not as rare an occurrence as one would think. I too have this issue on and off, have had it since I first got them (breasts). I recently got diagnosed with DMER (Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex) as I am breastfeeding, and the feeling has not changed from before starting to BF. Another thing is, that it is said that DMER (the depressing/sad/irritating/angry feeling begins when letdown (initial milk flow) starts in lactating women. The thing I've noticed is that I do not always get the feeling when milk starts to flow, and sometimes let down is happening and I simply do not feel a thing (other than the feeling of letting down of course). The only time I feel the symptoms of DMER is when I am pumping, or sometimes when I touch my nipples, or something touches them, or hubby touches them etc. Let down or no, the feeling has nothing to do w/ lactating/breastfeeding and yet everything to do with being touched. The only time I HAVE NOT felt it is when nursing baby directly. Whereas, the worst and strongest I've felt it is whilst using the breast pump. The strange thing for me is that the feelings and symptoms described in the literature for DMER are the exact same as the feelings you are all describing, and that I have been feeling for years.
My theory is, that this DMER, is not caused by, or specifically related to lactating/breastfeeding in women. I believe DMER happens to men and women, and it has more so to do with the nipples being stimulated. I believe both men and women experience DMER, unrelated to lactating and the letdown reflex. I also think that DMER in breastfeeding women occurs to only those women who may have had, even to the very slightest degree, issues with nipple stimulation. Therefor, the root cause of DMER should not be lactation/breastfeeding/letdown but instead it should be the actual stimulation of the nipple itself. I also feel that some people's nipples simply are overly sensitive. This might be the cause of the initial sensation deterrent (irritation, loathing, sadness etc.) "Why" is still a question here. But "what" can be found if we all look into DMER as a possible explanation for this feeling. I would enjoy reading further studies relating to the relation between DMER and the issue discussed here, rather than simply breastfeeding.
This is just my opinion. I am not a doctor, so I cannot say anything with absolute conviction. But this is certainly my theory on the subject through my research and experience.
Same here. I don't like even to touch it myself. And I can't stand the idea of anybody touching it or breast feeding. I'm pretty sure it's a psychological issue, but haven't figured exactly why. However, I think it might be due to my ex, who wasn't really a boob guy and almost wouldn't fondle them. However, even a slight ass grab makes me have butterflies in stomach.
uhhh, dumbest thing I've ever heard. I am a married man, my wife has this problem. I don't need to "suppress any urge for breasts". There are plenty of things we can do intimately to get me turned on. I think you, my friend may just have a boob addiction. Can't speak for everyone, but if tits make you resent your wife you have issues bro.
I have all of the symptoms that everyone else has thrown out there except I think you are the only other person who has brought up the fear of vomiting. I have struggled with this phobia for as long as i can remember and the negative feelings I get from nipple stimulation is extremely reminiscent of when I have anxiety about throwing up. Perhaps that is just because of a nauseous feeling I get but who knows... interesting you brought it up though.
This is literally the exact same thing that happens to me. I don't feel shame but I feel an uncontrollable nausea and depression. It must be triggering some neurotransmitter in the brain.
I AM SORRY THAT SO MANY WOMEN SEEM TO SUFFER WITH THIS PROBLEM, HOWEVER I AM RELIEVED TO KNOW THAT I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE. AS A TEENAGER, IT DIDN'T BOTHER ME. AS TIME WENT ON, I STARTED TO HATE IT. MY NIPPLES SEEMED TO GET MORE SENSITIVE. I NOTICED THAT MANY WOMEN SAY THEY FEEL HATRED AND WANT TO PUNCH THE PERSON TOUCHING THEM. I FEEL THE SAME WAY, AND CAN TOLORATE IT ONLY IF IN THE ACT AND REALLY TURNED ON. EVEN THEN IT FEELS NASTY. AND ONCE I'VE PEAKED, HE MUST STOP TOUCHING OR SUCKING MY BREASTS IMMEDIATELY. HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WHY I HATE IT SO MUCH AND NEITHER DO I. I WAS MOLESTED WHEN I WAS YOUNG AND MAYBE THAT IS WHY. WHEN MY BREASTS ARE BEING TOUCHED I FEEL DIRTY, EXPOSED, AND VIOLATED. I WISH SOMETIMES THAT I HAD NO FEELING IN THEM SO MY HUSBAND COULD ENJOY THEM AND I WOULDN'T HAVE TO FEEL THE WAY I DO.
When I was in 5th grade, I wore a shirt with an embroidered character over one boob. I did not wear a bra, as I was only starting to develop, and the inside of the shirt rubbed on the nipple and made me sick. That was the first time I remember having this awful, annoyed, angry, and sick to my stomach feeling from nipple stimulation. Since then, any extra nipple stimulation or even breast touching with bad timing can infuriate me. I love my fiance, the father of my 2 year old daughter, so much. He loves my boobs and always wants to touch and play with them and I feel bad keeping them from him, but honestly, I can't stand it one bit! I have been trying to figure out why for years and have no recollection of ever being molested, though the feelings that come from my boobs being touched by anything other than me, make me feel like I may be blocking something out. It brings terrible feelings of shame and some touching can bring instant tears. I want to know what wrong with me and I want to enjoy my boobs, not cover and protect them everywhere I go.
This is a question for all you women who feel that way. are you 20 years and over and does not have a child or had a child after twenty one or two? are your breasts being touched apart from when their is sex involved? is your mind and heart stimulated when you are going to make love to your other half? Do you love or still love your other half? Well answer these questions in stages 1 to 4 and then i might be able to help you.
oh and #5 were you molested as a child?
I am almost crying with relief, knowing there are other women like me. I feel so awful that my husband wants to enjoy my breasts, but I can't stand him doing anything to them. Like some others, it gives me a feeling of nausea. I try to let him stimulate them, but before long I have to push him away.
I completely understand. My father did molest me, and when in public tried to get away with pinching my nipples. I couldn't even breastfeed my child for more than 6 weeks because the actual physical touch of my nipples made my skin crawl, the hair go up on the back of my neck.... my mom who did not know at the time about the abuse, was so angry with me breast feeding for only 6 weeks. But my son would take over an hour to feed and I just could not deal. Now I have a wonderful man who says he is not kissing my breast on purpose but when he does it sends horrible stress waves through my body, and then he says he feels horrible. we have been together for over three years, but yet just the other day he did not get it, like it was a mistake. I want to believe him.
Maybe there are just some women that do not like their nipples touched, why not? Maybe it has nothing to do with my abuse. But I can't make him understand. He told me tonight it was a Pavlov response, that I should be able to change it. Maybe I can. I want to chose happiness
This may sound weird but when I had it my friend told me to try holding ice onto it for a minute or 2 and it actually worked but if doesn't work don't worry there is probably many other ways, if it doesn't work try googling for some answers! Hope this helps!
Amber