im 33y/o and thought i was the only one with this problem or it was just my marriage situation that caused me to feel this way. before marriage i could stand my breast being touch sometimes and also depends on whos touching them. some of my relationships i liked my boyfriend touching them and other relationship it made me cringe. Im married 7 years to a man 20 years older than me. he is the sweetest person i know and he takes such good care of me. we dont have kids together but he has kids from previous relationship. the love for my husband is pure emotion I have no physical attraction towards my husband and the fact that he is having the onset of ED doesnt help. when my husband try to touch my breast or neck it grosses me out. I wanna scream. but he is the only one who knows how to please me well orally. for the pass 6months i have turned outside my marriage n started having a sexual affair with this guy. i love when he sucks my breast during or leading up to intercourse. right through the whole encounter he is touching n sucking on my breast n its mind blowing. But i dont love him. I dont even feel anything emotional close to what i feel for my hubby. why cant i have this same sexual feeling towards my husband since he's the one i love.
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I too have this problem. I don't mind the areola being touched, but I cant stand the feeling of having my nipples touched. I can't stand the water in the shower touching them, and I always have to sleep with a tight shirt on so that I don't brush against anything. The only time that I can stand them being touched is when I am really really turned on, but even then it feels really slutty and yukky and I feel empty afterwards. So I don't like having my husband touch them because it makes our relationship feel yuk - kinda like the yuk feeling I get if I imagine him sleeping with another woman, for example, which kinda turns me on but also seems sad and disgusting. Anyway, this is complicated by two things.
I get eczema on my nipples. I have always had bad eczema on my body and when I turned 11 or 12 and started developing breasts I got eczema on my nipples really bad (I also started getting contact dermatitis/eczema from my menstrual blood!). When I get really angry my body heats up and all my eczema gets itchy. So often when I am angry my nipples get itchy and then I scratch them. I do wonder if I have caused this yukky feeling by associating nipple touching with anger.
I can't stand my nipples being touched + Breast feeding = uh oh :-( This has been a source of anxiety for the last 2 years since we decided we'd like to start trying for a baby. I have searched on the internet for anything about these two things added together, without finding anything. When I watch a video of how to breast feed *shudder*, when the lactation consultant says "the baby is sucking on the nipple" *gag* When the mother flicks her nipple along the baby face to get him to want to feed *suicidal thoughts* It's like a porn movie or something. The whole thing makes me feel totally disgusting. Yet there's all this pressure to BF, I am so worried that people with pressure me about it and ask why I'm not and it will bring it all up and make me feel gross as well as totally guilty. I have looked a lot online at reasons why mothers can't breastfeed, but not being able to stand having your nipples touched is not discussed anywhere! GRRR
In conclusion:
How can I breastfeed when I get severe eczema on my nipples? (And that is prior to any irritation that will be caused by the baby feeding!)
And, how can I breastfeed when I can't stand my nipples being touched?
I get eczema on my nipples. I have always had bad eczema on my body and when I turned 11 or 12 and started developing breasts I got eczema on my nipples really bad (I also started getting contact dermatitis/eczema from my menstrual blood!). When I get really angry my body heats up and all my eczema gets itchy. So often when I am angry my nipples get itchy and then I scratch them. I do wonder if I have caused this yukky feeling by associating nipple touching with anger.
I can't stand my nipples being touched + Breast feeding = uh oh :-( This has been a source of anxiety for the last 2 years since we decided we'd like to start trying for a baby. I have searched on the internet for anything about these two things added together, without finding anything. When I watch a video of how to breast feed *shudder*, when the lactation consultant says "the baby is sucking on the nipple" *gag* When the mother flicks her nipple along the baby face to get him to want to feed *suicidal thoughts* It's like a porn movie or something. The whole thing makes me feel totally disgusting. Yet there's all this pressure to BF, I am so worried that people with pressure me about it and ask why I'm not and it will bring it all up and make me feel gross as well as totally guilty. I have looked a lot online at reasons why mothers can't breastfeed, but not being able to stand having your nipples touched is not discussed anywhere! GRRR
In conclusion:
How can I breastfeed when I get severe eczema on my nipples? (And that is prior to any irritation that will be caused by the baby feeding!)
And, how can I breastfeed when I can't stand my nipples being touched?
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On the contrary I had inverted nipples - my gynec advised sucking to bring them out naturally - At age 16 I had size 36 C breasts but nipples sunk like small depressions. I remember it was a weird feeling when my hubby started sucking or pulling them out - I did feel pain, but this was transitional. Later I enjoyed this part of the act
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SAD NIPPLE SYNDROME: ever since i can remember, when my nipples are touched i feel incredibly
depressed. It's unexplainable. I think of everything thats sad in my life within a second.
It is really indescribable. i am seventeen and have been dealing with it for so long. especially when im not wearing a braw,
not only am i self-concious but i walk around feeling immensly depressed because of the clothing brushing up
against me. It happened tonight when i removed my braw before sleeping. I finally said to myself this can't be just me. so i, of course, googled it. I AM NOT ALONE(: I now know the medical cause and everything. Thank god.
depressed. It's unexplainable. I think of everything thats sad in my life within a second.
It is really indescribable. i am seventeen and have been dealing with it for so long. especially when im not wearing a braw,
not only am i self-concious but i walk around feeling immensly depressed because of the clothing brushing up
against me. It happened tonight when i removed my braw before sleeping. I finally said to myself this can't be just me. so i, of course, googled it. I AM NOT ALONE(: I now know the medical cause and everything. Thank god.
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I THINK I MAY HAVE SOME GENUINE ANSWERS!!!!!!!!! KEEP READING!!!
I've had this problem my whole adult life. I thought it was a result of the sexual abuse I experienced as a child, and just decided to put up with it and make sure my breasts were always left alone. But I had a baby a year ago, and desperately wanted him to be breast fed, even though I could not stand the thought.. I have a lot of willpower, though, and pushed through it, even though it felt like my whole world was falling apart every time, with a sick, ANGRY, disgusting feeling in my tummy (while my body was constantly re-living the horrors of being raped, but that's another story) . (my hubby had to stay in another room without making the smallest noise, or I would SCREAM at him :-)
I finally found something about this online, where other nursing mother are reporting the exect same emotions/experiences (but not the flash backs, of course) upon breast stimulation as me, and as the rest of you guys!
They call it D-MER (Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex). (Check out this wed site: d-mer.org or http://www.d-mer.org/Home_Page.html )
I know most of you guys are not breast feeding, but somebody mentioned that oxytocin is released whenever breasts are being stimulated, even if you don't have a baby. And in D-MER it is oxytocin which sets it all off!!!
I'm not doing a good job explaining this, but this is how they explain the negative emotional response on the mentioned web site:
***edited by moderator*** ** inappropriate posting**
Please read our Terms of Use
I really do believe there to be a strong connection between what you guys are experiencing, and what happens to some women during breast feeding. Check out the D-MER website, and let me know what you think.
They don't seem to have it all figured out yet, either, but at least they're trying..
I certainly found reading it very, very helpful! :-)
vx
I've had this problem my whole adult life. I thought it was a result of the sexual abuse I experienced as a child, and just decided to put up with it and make sure my breasts were always left alone. But I had a baby a year ago, and desperately wanted him to be breast fed, even though I could not stand the thought.. I have a lot of willpower, though, and pushed through it, even though it felt like my whole world was falling apart every time, with a sick, ANGRY, disgusting feeling in my tummy (while my body was constantly re-living the horrors of being raped, but that's another story) . (my hubby had to stay in another room without making the smallest noise, or I would SCREAM at him :-)
I finally found something about this online, where other nursing mother are reporting the exect same emotions/experiences (but not the flash backs, of course) upon breast stimulation as me, and as the rest of you guys!
They call it D-MER (Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex). (Check out this wed site: d-mer.org or http://www.d-mer.org/Home_Page.html )
I know most of you guys are not breast feeding, but somebody mentioned that oxytocin is released whenever breasts are being stimulated, even if you don't have a baby. And in D-MER it is oxytocin which sets it all off!!!
I'm not doing a good job explaining this, but this is how they explain the negative emotional response on the mentioned web site:
***edited by moderator*** ** inappropriate posting**
Please read our Terms of Use
I really do believe there to be a strong connection between what you guys are experiencing, and what happens to some women during breast feeding. Check out the D-MER website, and let me know what you think.
They don't seem to have it all figured out yet, either, but at least they're trying..
I certainly found reading it very, very helpful! :-)
vx
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I am so glad to know that I am not the only person out there who has nipple issues.
I thought it had to do with the fact that I went to a super religious private school where there was no sex education which is why I feel weird about it. Then I thought it was because I was molested when I was 14 by this guy in my school. Then I thought that maybe I just had some psychological block that was not allowing me to enjoy it. My boyfriend is relatively understanding about the situation, but he's terrified to touch me sometimes because he thinks that I'm afraid of him or that I don't trust him.
With my case, I don't feel angry or sad when they are touched, it's this feeling that I can't really describe. Uncomfortable would be the best way to put it, and I've felt that way about anything brushing up against them since before puberty. Maybe since I was about 7 years old or so.
I thought something was wrong with me. I'm really relieved to know that there are other people with this little issue as well.
I thought it had to do with the fact that I went to a super religious private school where there was no sex education which is why I feel weird about it. Then I thought it was because I was molested when I was 14 by this guy in my school. Then I thought that maybe I just had some psychological block that was not allowing me to enjoy it. My boyfriend is relatively understanding about the situation, but he's terrified to touch me sometimes because he thinks that I'm afraid of him or that I don't trust him.
With my case, I don't feel angry or sad when they are touched, it's this feeling that I can't really describe. Uncomfortable would be the best way to put it, and I've felt that way about anything brushing up against them since before puberty. Maybe since I was about 7 years old or so.
I thought something was wrong with me. I'm really relieved to know that there are other people with this little issue as well.
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I also have this problem, but I'm only 22. At certain times I can allow my partner to stimulate them because he wants to, but when he does, it induces great hatred, and angers me greatly. I have had this with my ex aswell, but it also irritates me when I brush against something. I have not had a bad childhood, and I don't ever recall being molested, I have a great memory. I don't like upsetting my fiance, God love him he can't help himself, but I just hate it. It makes me feel like punching him, and I don't want to feel like that. I'm also glad I'm not the only one with this problem. But if someone could come up with a solution that would be fantastic. I don't feel like i'm missing out, but I'd rather be able to be closer to my fiance. Also the prospect of having children, and the thought of breast feeding is a scary thought. I don't want to be angry in the future, and would like to give what is thought to be the best start in life for a baby... Although that maybe for the far future. But if in that time there is a solution, i'd be really greatful. It really is an unpleasant feeling.
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So happy I found this post. A couple of nights ago tickled my husband's nipple and he snapped at me and I asked him why he always gets so angry when I touch his nipples and in him trying to describe it we both ended up saying "It feels so filthy!" at the same time. I was shocked. I'm 22 and ever since puberty I have hated having my nipples touched. Even brushed passed. It's worse when it's someone I'm close to. I just get this empty feeling, like everything is dark and sad and I feel disgusted in myself. It was amazing to find out after over 5 years my husband and I feel the same. He's the only guy I'd ever been with so I sort of conditioned myself to "like" when he touched my breast, cause "that's what all women do"...or so I thought. It doesn't bother me when he touches my nipples and it gets me in the mood most times. But if anyone else brushes past them or I even accidently touch them, (which just now prompted me to google this) I freak out!
Now I don't know if I've been molested, but I know my biological father had molested my older sister- he got sent to prison when I was 3, so I really don't know. But, I was always wary that if I dig too deep on this subject, I could uncover something I repressed...that I don't ever want to do!
I also think that there maybe some crossed nerve endinGs, or the area is really over sensitive. I know the G-spot is linked with emotion, hence why some women burst out crying uncontrollably right before they orgasm...I don't know. Funny thing is, I'm doing a psychology degree and I started studying emotion and human cognition today. So maybe I'll find out what I need to know!
Now I don't know if I've been molested, but I know my biological father had molested my older sister- he got sent to prison when I was 3, so I really don't know. But, I was always wary that if I dig too deep on this subject, I could uncover something I repressed...that I don't ever want to do!
I also think that there maybe some crossed nerve endinGs, or the area is really over sensitive. I know the G-spot is linked with emotion, hence why some women burst out crying uncontrollably right before they orgasm...I don't know. Funny thing is, I'm doing a psychology degree and I started studying emotion and human cognition today. So maybe I'll find out what I need to know!
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I'm a forty+ year old man who has had many dozens of partners. You are not alone in this 'don't touch my nipples' thing. I don't think it is abnormal or even rare; I think about 1 in 10 women in my past either got nothing out of breast stimulation, or outright loathed it.
I've read about people who are suddenly paralyzed by accident or illness, "eroticizing" other areas of their bodies (neck, arms, etc.) that still have feeling once they have lost sensation in their genitals or other previously erotic zones. They do this by thinking erotic thoughts when touched there.
Further, other cultures eroticize feet or other regions. My point is, some women LOVE breast play; one partner used to shove my face into her breast with one hand while cupping and shoving her soft lovely into my mouth with the other. Others, like you, didn't want their nipples touched at all. I'm not certain that you could or would even want to eroticize your nipples. I, for example don't like to have my scrotum stimulated, some guys love that.
We are all different!
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It might be caused by the release of oxytocin, a powerful hormone that affects your mood that is released during nipple stimulation. The strange feelings may be worse if you have a mood disorder or if you are stressed. When I touch my nipples I feel weird, disgusted and uncomfortable, and sometimes I start laughing...
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I'm almost certain that mostly every person has had the same answer on here but after reading all of these stories I can't help but say it myself. I never knew their were so Many women out there dealing with the same thing I am. I thought I was alone for so long. That something was wrong with me. It started when puberty started. I noticed it tickled without a bra on. But I was a very curiously sexual child and used it to my advantage at times. The problem is, I'd feel shame and guilt and even cry after the deed was done, so to speak. I thought there had to be something wrong with me. As I grew older it bugged me more and more to the point where I have to wear one certain bra for a long time Cus getting used to a knew one would mean weeks of crying and pinching. I pinch my nipples bc I feel no tickle afterwards. I'm not sure if that's bad for them but it helps me temprorarily. My boyfriend does stimulate my nipples when I'm very much in the mood. Otherwise he knows to steer clear of them. Sometimes he will joke and tickle them to the point where I want to cry. It's almost as if it's so stimulating that i just don't want it anymore. I feel naughty and it turns me off. Actually it turns me on but makes me not want to be if that makes sense. Btw I'm eighteen so this has been a problem for a while now. I can't even wear a decent bathing suit without feeling uncomfortable. Sometimes I wish I didn't have nipples at all. Someone please help us!!
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I don't think it is an emotional thing as much as sensitivity as even when my nipples become erect, it is unpleasant. It kind of "aches" or feel sore. Don't know how to explain it but this has been ever since I remember. When totally in the throes of passion, I guess I just do not notice it as much as then I don't care if hubby is gettin' busy with the girls. I wish I could enjoy it as these are supposed to be an errogenous zone, but I don't. Very unpleasant sensation to me.
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I also have a similar reaction. I don't mind my boobs being touched but the nipples are off limits. Like nails down a blackboard, and irritates me greatly when my husband does it.
Like some on here I worried about breastfeeding, but that was before I knew that breastfeeding involves less stimulation of the nipple and more of the breast. I hated the increased sensitivity during pregnancy and the early days, but once I got the latch right breastfeeding didn't bother my nipples at all. I've since trained as a supporter and what some of you describe sounds a lot like a condition called D-MER. I wonder if there's a link.
Anyway I had hoped that successfully and happily breastfeeding two babies would have cured me of this phobia but no such luck. Very frustrating!
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having my nipples licked or touch doesn't technically annoy me, it just doesn't turn me on. At all. I don't get any pleasure out of it and it's a shame since my husband loves to try and get me in the mood by sucking on them. I'm so happy to hear there are many more out there with this same issue.
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I don't mind having my nipples touched by my partner or anything, but if I don't wear a bra and they rub against my shirt it starts to make me sick to my stomach. I get this really uncomfortable , uneasy feeling. I hate it because I don't want to have my bra on all the time! :P
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