It saddens me that so many of you have failed at discovering your own sexuality and failed to get to know your husband's sexuality.
I've been in a 5 year relationship with the greatest woman I have ever met. We share sexual intimacy almost everyday. Sometimes it's sex, sometimes it's mutual masterbation, sometimes it's masterbating ourselves while we lie next to eachother. In addition to our beautiful and intimate sexual lives together, we also both occasionally have our private times.Relying on another person for 100% of your sexual satisfaction isn't healthy or fair to either of you. I masterbate regularly. A couple years ago, it was once a day, these days it's once every couple of days. I need it, I want it, and I wouldn't give that private time up for anyone. My sexual self, my private thoughts, my personal fantasies, and knowing my own body is important. I'm a better lover because of it, more importantly, It helps me to love myself. My Girlfriend also masterbates. I'm not insulted, WHY WOULD I BE??? It's important that she have her own sexual private time, it's important that she have the privacy to sexually know herself and be intimate with her own body and mind.There are preoccupations that aren't healthy. Masterbating several times a day whilst ignoring your partner completely is most certainly not healthy and is a sign of much bigger problems. An over-reliance on pornography to achieve sexual satisfaction isn't healthy either. But condemning your husband's personal sexuality is a terrible thing to do. If you want to be closer to him sexually, perhaps the first thing you should do is get to know yourself sexually first. Masterbate, and when you've grown comfortable with that, and realized that it's a beautiful thing, offer to masterbate with him, next to him. Not only will he probably discover a new found desire to make love to you, BOTH of you will discover a new happiness and healthier attitude towards sex, your bodies, and yourselves.
Dont ask youre husband number two question. That will only make you and him feel worse forever. I Agree with the azz guy he is saying the correct thing here. Also do your keegles down there. And he and you probably gained weight and both got lazy and tired since the kid. Most people with newborns never sleep therefore never really have much energy or sex drive. So then he likes masterbation because it's easy and effortless since he's out of shape. No expectations like before. Plus he might be bored . He also might see you as a mom and not as sexual so you need to try harder to excite him. Dont attack his masterbation it only makes us lie and pull away. Get him hot and get yourself sexier and offer bj's too. Explain nicely that it hurts your feelings and what you can do that would make him feel better. Good luck, my marriage ended shortly after this happened to us because we didnt talk about it. She went crazy jelous and caused issues and i moved out and slept in the car , the end...
I don't agree with any of this...if men have a wife that is willing and able 28 hours 10 days a week to have sex, give blow jobs, basically DTF anytime...I don't understand why men still have to masturbate...this makes NO sense!!!! I would rather f**k then be by myself to get off!! Men are some pretty strange creatures...just saying!!!
I am sick of being lied to! I spy on him now, when I get the feeling he is doing it. He was single for years, and now he only gets off good when he jacks off, because he is used to it. I refuse to work, I refuse to leave him at home alone. And I have a peephole to his restroom now. Ha ha, I told him, game OVER loser! I masturbate while he is away, since he doesn't make me tingle at all. Never has, no one does. (hello clit, goodbye man) If he is too dumb to figure it out, oh well! He is cute, and Italiano, so I love him. Life is fun, especially when you play dumb like me
I have sex with him sometimes but mostly I ask him if he'd just rather just masterbate and most of the time he's more than fine with doing it. He also keeps his little penis totally shaved he's very child like that way. And I really don't like having that much sex with a husband that very child sized anyway and he is totally aware of this.
I've been masturbating since I was 13. my wife caught me one night in the bathroom beating off. the next morning she asked if my conscience was bothering me. I said no. was hers? while our sex life was horribly minimal, my point is, when I remarry, my new wife WILL KNOW that I WILL continue beating off no matter how good our sex life is because I simply love to beat off. its a release that comes only from my self and my hand, and it satisfies a special itch. if she wants to watch, I would love to have her do so. better yet I would love it if she was willing to masturbate too, so we could do so together. I'm rather open about the subject.
yes beating off is secondary to sex with her, but... it has its place, and I refuse to (try and) stop beating off, period! I'm not addicted, I simply have a high libido, and beating off helps me to manage. I hope this helps. by the way I'm almost 70yo and I beat off almost daily, 5-6 times a week, and yes you can get off with a limp penis. whoever wrote that doesn't know what their talking about, my brother agreed (we know that we both beat off).
i'm a male and your husband is going to hate me for this BUT, this isnt about masturbation anymore. this is ESCALATION. I've been beating off for 56 years and i would NEVER involve another person like you described your husband doing. EVER. where will your husband stop? adultery? yes i look at and beat off to porn, but when i remarry, she will know in advance that while her needs are THE priority, she will know that beating off will NOT go away. PERIOD. SHE will also be the subject of my lust and her body with all its various little curves and such that make her, her, will be what gets me off, not porn. i owe her that at least. her needs are the priority, not beating off.
beating off for a male is different than what it is for a female. with my high labido, it fills a real need (since i'm between wives, she lives in another state and i dont want to involve another woman so she gets pregnant or i catch a disease) so beating off does the job i genuinely need. my sex drive tells me so. ( by the way, at 69yo ALL my get offs are dynamite. as good as sex, as i remember it anyway. do your kegels)
YOUR needs are not being addressed and you have legitimate reason for concern and complaint. if your husband gives you what you want to YOUR satisfaction, and then proceeds to beat off, so be it. and in my opinion, he should be open and HONEST about it with you, HIS WIFE. not someone he talks to on the computer.
with my labido, i can't stop either. i've tried. but your maritial DUE needs to take priority to his beating off. also period. if you did what he is doing would he find this acceptable? of course not. if he found that you were interested in other men, would he be happy with that knowledge? today, with todays attitudes he may even like it. HONEST COMMUNICATION is whats needed between you and him and he needs to confront and address his conduct on his computer involving other people. BIG PERIOD. or it could cost you your marriage. its that serious.
beating off (a 60s term i like better than "jerking off" cuz it sounds more naughty) is a practice that few males can honestly stop doing because someone else wants them to. our sex drive is relentless. I've beat off many times only to find myself, playing with myself a few minutes later. it cant be helped. and i'm almost 70 now. last year it was twice a day every day for months. and like i said, ALL my orgasms are amazing. anyway i hope this helps you to understand our male perspective and hope this helps your husband see that hes destroying your marriage due to his escalation, not his masturbation, as long as hes giving you what need. and i hope he doesnt find me and kill me.