I'm really glad that I found this site. After reading all of your stories I realized that many people have been going through the same things I have. It's a relief.
I met a girl last summer while helping out at a campground my mother runs, and we hit it off pretty quickly. She did tell me she was bipolar, and that she was getting a divorce from her abusive husband that she had been seperated from for about 4 months. She also had a daughter from a previous marriage and a son from her current one. None of this scared me away as she was beautiful, interesting, and we could talk for hours about anything. I'm 27, and it seems that most women my age have children and I really love spending time with her daughter (even though watching the same tinkerbell movie several times in a row does get a little irritating). My girlfriend drank pretty frequently at the time, and I soon learned to associate the sight of a beer can in her hand with a emotionally draining evening of verbal abuse. She would call me all kinds of nasty things and would talk about breaking up, nothing I said could convince her that I loved her and that her tough life didn't scare me, and that I wanted to be there for her. I would end up feeling like garbage, she would go off to bed. The next day she would be completely different, apologizing for everything she had said and showering me with affection. I soon learned not to take it too personally, but the insults still hurt and I would just wish that it would pass quickly so I could once again see the beautiful, smart, funny and loving woman who had stolen my heart. Aside from those senseless outbursts, we got along pretty well.
Then about 2 months after we met, I found out that my brother in TN desperately needed help at my old place of work in a small regional airport. He was working around 15 hours a day and was exhausted from the huge work load. They needed me back for about 5 months. I didn't want to leave my girlfriend, but when a blood relative needs help it's really not a choice. She was pretty upset, but eventually she came to be ok with it as long as I called her every day.
So, we celebrated her birthday early because I would miss the actual date. I looked all over several nearby towns to find the perfect gifts for her, I wanted this to be a day sshe wouldn't forget. She had told me that she had never really had a birthday party, her family really wasn't into all that. Seeing her eyes shine and her face light up with a smile with each present she opened warmed my heart. We had a great time.
Then I left. We kept in contact via phone and e-mail as I had promised. One day, about a month and a half after I left, she broke up with me. The last conversation we had had was very nice, with a lot of "I love you". Just a few hours later she told me she couldn't do this anymore, that I didn't love her, that if I did I wouldn't have been so eager to leave her. I wasn't eager, it tore me apart. I missed her terribly. After that I was miserable. She said she wanted to stay friends, and I accepted, hoping that as long as we were still talking we could fix this. She broke up with me completely two weeks later, the way she talked it sounded like she could care less if I was in her life or not. Completely different from the way she usually was. I guess she was going through another down cycle. I didn't hear from her again for over a month.
A little over a month later she sent me a text. I had erased her number and had been trying to move on and not think about her, so it was a shock for me. She said she had been selfish and stupid and had ruined the greatest thing taht had happened to her, and she wanted to get back together. I was torn between wanting her back and being afraid that she would just break up with me again out of the blue like before. I thought about it for a couple of days, and agreed to take it slowly and see how it went, i told her that she needed to regain my trust after everything that had happened and that she had to be sure that she really wanted me back.
Over the next few weeks we gradually grew closer again, and I did begin to trust her more. She had stopped drinking, moved out of the apartment with the bad neighbors that she was always fighting with, was looking for a job, and seemed to getting herself back together. She also seemed to be happier, more like her old self. Every so often she would send me a lovely text message about how much she loved me, and how grateful she was to have me in her life, and that she couldn't wait to hold me again. I have to say, those messages made me want to just run back to her, I missed her so much. Things really seemed to looking good for us.
Then she got sick about a week ago, the doctor she went to said she had bronchitis. Since she had difficulty talking, we kept in touch by texting. There was still a lot of loving words in the things we said to each other, and she had not once said anything to hurt my feelings. I guess I got lulled into a false sense of security, because just two days ago I noticed she had removed me from her facebook list and set her profile to private, and when I tried to call her it went straight to voice mail. i sent her an e-mail asking what was going on and got no reply. We had been texting and calling frequently since we got back together so this was starting to worry me. As the day wore on I got more and more desperate, I must have sent her over a dozen texts, e-mails, and voice messages. She was completely ignoring me. Then I tried calling from a different phone, it rang. When she heard my voice she hung up. She had been blocking my cell number! I guess my frequent attempts to get through to her and find out what was going on finally irritated her enough to send me a text. She said there was no problem, she was sick and tired and wanted to be alone, and told me to go away. Now if she just wanted to be alone, why would she erase me from facebook (she was very proud to display her relationship status with me in it) and block my calls? She could have just told me that. It seemed that once again, within hours of saying "I love you" she wanted me out of her life. I asked her if that was the case, did she still love or want me gone? She told me to go away. I haven't heard from her since. All this after she had told me that she was sorry from breaking up with me the first time, that she wasn't going anywhere, that I was the one she wanted and that she loved me with all her heart.
I'm feeling kind of numb now. After reading all of your stories, I see a lot of similarities. I'm hoping this is just another cycle and that I'll hear from her again soon. I go back home in another month, and it's a small town so I'm bound to bump into her somewhere. I have been dreaming of seeing her again all these months, of holding her close and feeling her heart beat against my chest, looking into her eyes and telling her I love her. Now, I don't know if that will ever happen. I know now that the best I can expect is to go through this every so often, a cycle of love and hate. As many of you have described, she was crazy in love with me on minute and couldn't get away from me fast enough the next. I really do love her, and I do miss her. Heck, even my mom likes her and believe me that's an accomplishment! Besides these sudden mood changes we got along fine. Now, I don't know.
Sorry, I know this was long and I'm rambling, but I just needed to vent a little. It's nice to know that there are people who understand what it's like to suddenly be given the boot without any kind of warning, and have to develop a stronger mental attitude to deal with the verbal abuse and recklessness of the person that you're in love with. It's certainly helped me feel better about all this. Like many of you have said, I hate the person she becomes when she's down, but I absolutely adore the wonderful woman that she really is. I don't know If I'll ever hear from again, but I do know that want to make this work. I guess I just have to wait and see.
I met a girl last summer while helping out at a campground my mother runs, and we hit it off pretty quickly. She did tell me she was bipolar, and that she was getting a divorce from her abusive husband that she had been seperated from for about 4 months. She also had a daughter from a previous marriage and a son from her current one. None of this scared me away as she was beautiful, interesting, and we could talk for hours about anything. I'm 27, and it seems that most women my age have children and I really love spending time with her daughter (even though watching the same tinkerbell movie several times in a row does get a little irritating). My girlfriend drank pretty frequently at the time, and I soon learned to associate the sight of a beer can in her hand with a emotionally draining evening of verbal abuse. She would call me all kinds of nasty things and would talk about breaking up, nothing I said could convince her that I loved her and that her tough life didn't scare me, and that I wanted to be there for her. I would end up feeling like garbage, she would go off to bed. The next day she would be completely different, apologizing for everything she had said and showering me with affection. I soon learned not to take it too personally, but the insults still hurt and I would just wish that it would pass quickly so I could once again see the beautiful, smart, funny and loving woman who had stolen my heart. Aside from those senseless outbursts, we got along pretty well.
Then about 2 months after we met, I found out that my brother in TN desperately needed help at my old place of work in a small regional airport. He was working around 15 hours a day and was exhausted from the huge work load. They needed me back for about 5 months. I didn't want to leave my girlfriend, but when a blood relative needs help it's really not a choice. She was pretty upset, but eventually she came to be ok with it as long as I called her every day.
So, we celebrated her birthday early because I would miss the actual date. I looked all over several nearby towns to find the perfect gifts for her, I wanted this to be a day sshe wouldn't forget. She had told me that she had never really had a birthday party, her family really wasn't into all that. Seeing her eyes shine and her face light up with a smile with each present she opened warmed my heart. We had a great time.
Then I left. We kept in contact via phone and e-mail as I had promised. One day, about a month and a half after I left, she broke up with me. The last conversation we had had was very nice, with a lot of "I love you". Just a few hours later she told me she couldn't do this anymore, that I didn't love her, that if I did I wouldn't have been so eager to leave her. I wasn't eager, it tore me apart. I missed her terribly. After that I was miserable. She said she wanted to stay friends, and I accepted, hoping that as long as we were still talking we could fix this. She broke up with me completely two weeks later, the way she talked it sounded like she could care less if I was in her life or not. Completely different from the way she usually was. I guess she was going through another down cycle. I didn't hear from her again for over a month.
A little over a month later she sent me a text. I had erased her number and had been trying to move on and not think about her, so it was a shock for me. She said she had been selfish and stupid and had ruined the greatest thing taht had happened to her, and she wanted to get back together. I was torn between wanting her back and being afraid that she would just break up with me again out of the blue like before. I thought about it for a couple of days, and agreed to take it slowly and see how it went, i told her that she needed to regain my trust after everything that had happened and that she had to be sure that she really wanted me back.
Over the next few weeks we gradually grew closer again, and I did begin to trust her more. She had stopped drinking, moved out of the apartment with the bad neighbors that she was always fighting with, was looking for a job, and seemed to getting herself back together. She also seemed to be happier, more like her old self. Every so often she would send me a lovely text message about how much she loved me, and how grateful she was to have me in her life, and that she couldn't wait to hold me again. I have to say, those messages made me want to just run back to her, I missed her so much. Things really seemed to looking good for us.
Then she got sick about a week ago, the doctor she went to said she had bronchitis. Since she had difficulty talking, we kept in touch by texting. There was still a lot of loving words in the things we said to each other, and she had not once said anything to hurt my feelings. I guess I got lulled into a false sense of security, because just two days ago I noticed she had removed me from her facebook list and set her profile to private, and when I tried to call her it went straight to voice mail. i sent her an e-mail asking what was going on and got no reply. We had been texting and calling frequently since we got back together so this was starting to worry me. As the day wore on I got more and more desperate, I must have sent her over a dozen texts, e-mails, and voice messages. She was completely ignoring me. Then I tried calling from a different phone, it rang. When she heard my voice she hung up. She had been blocking my cell number! I guess my frequent attempts to get through to her and find out what was going on finally irritated her enough to send me a text. She said there was no problem, she was sick and tired and wanted to be alone, and told me to go away. Now if she just wanted to be alone, why would she erase me from facebook (she was very proud to display her relationship status with me in it) and block my calls? She could have just told me that. It seemed that once again, within hours of saying "I love you" she wanted me out of her life. I asked her if that was the case, did she still love or want me gone? She told me to go away. I haven't heard from her since. All this after she had told me that she was sorry from breaking up with me the first time, that she wasn't going anywhere, that I was the one she wanted and that she loved me with all her heart.
I'm feeling kind of numb now. After reading all of your stories, I see a lot of similarities. I'm hoping this is just another cycle and that I'll hear from her again soon. I go back home in another month, and it's a small town so I'm bound to bump into her somewhere. I have been dreaming of seeing her again all these months, of holding her close and feeling her heart beat against my chest, looking into her eyes and telling her I love her. Now, I don't know if that will ever happen. I know now that the best I can expect is to go through this every so often, a cycle of love and hate. As many of you have described, she was crazy in love with me on minute and couldn't get away from me fast enough the next. I really do love her, and I do miss her. Heck, even my mom likes her and believe me that's an accomplishment! Besides these sudden mood changes we got along fine. Now, I don't know.
Sorry, I know this was long and I'm rambling, but I just needed to vent a little. It's nice to know that there are people who understand what it's like to suddenly be given the boot without any kind of warning, and have to develop a stronger mental attitude to deal with the verbal abuse and recklessness of the person that you're in love with. It's certainly helped me feel better about all this. Like many of you have said, I hate the person she becomes when she's down, but I absolutely adore the wonderful woman that she really is. I don't know If I'll ever hear from again, but I do know that want to make this work. I guess I just have to wait and see.
wow i didnt realize how many of us piss pots are out there... i am a doc and met the girl of my dreams... yeah right beautiful charming then .........................ooops forgot to mention the cocaine problem...then the famous quote why do you have a problem with me sleeping with black men... actually that wasnt the problem its was the 36 men by the time she was 22 not too mention the peace corp african boyfriends, the italian boyfriends, etc etc... then there was the pictures and sex diaries all over the house and off course then my house because we rushed into living together... did i mention the abortion.. (the one that i know about) Why do all there names have to be exotic..... i think she chose them based on there names... lol............did i mention her sister is a known prostitituite, her other sisters husband blew his brains out, yes there are many artists in the family.........and yes there was a huge painting of jezebel in the family room... wtf...........................yes they love the kardashians...............did i mention her ripping my medical diagrams.... what about her friend shoving a pill in her face and then making out with her in front of my face......... then i was the as****e who pulled them apart...........gross...........yes she and i made love (use the term lightly) in restaurants..........yes she asked me if i wanted to sleep with her friend... yes i found her mom placing massage ads on craigslist. ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,of course i slept with her on the first night and off course she comment on my penis oh its big i thought for sure you would be tiny do you know how many men have tiny penises.. (what the hell am i thinking) yes off course there was the physical alterations that she tried and tries to provoke... i thought it was me.. i was convinced i had a problem........ I had a problem all right it was being addicted to a borderline or bipolar woman........ yes she is aquarius..... did i mention another sister with three illigitamate children...(spelling off but i am tired) trust me i am tired... arent we all who deal or are addicted to these types...
I like the one comment the guy wrote about suggesting drugs to deal with them............ funny.............. i know that the guys before me with her were on drugs...................... yes i know what your thinking i am attractive i am extemely intelligent but my friends i am no match for a bipolar borderline woman.................. i understand why kurt cobain was out in the greenhouse all of the time................. did i mention that my house was shot by a cabbie who was obsessed by her... did i mention i saw her old boyfriend trying to have 3 somes on craigslist while they did coke..... gross gross gross. i dont even kiss her passionately i dont even think i kiss her.................. she has premature and multiple orgasms ( probably a dopamine thing) it feeds my stupid ego.. i am sure...........i am getting deeper and deeper yes i got engaged...................... yes the priest who is friends with the family questioned if i knew the "unique and interesting family i was about to marry into..................... she didnt even get it...........off course water seeks its own level but i know i am somewhat crazy (good crazy)....... but i have found out what bad crazy is.............. yes there are the times she has thrown my ring 4 times........... not that i am counting.............. yes she amazingly finds a way to blame me for every fight...........last fight was because her friend is pregnant.................. o yes her friends one word s**ts boring party girls with no depth.............. yes she wants a baby i know that she will go nuts when the placental progesterone drops.. after all that must be why her father kept her mom pregnant (10 times) did i tell you she worked as a waitress in a strip club .......... o and the letters from convicts and the jokes about the condom fishbowl that she and her friends had at her college apartment............. yes to the guys reading she is very hot.. .............did i mention the inappropriate dressing.......... asking her to not show off her tattoo at my hospital awards banquet was a real treat... let me tell you................. had they know who that pretty girl in the red dress next too me was,,, i doubt i would have been elected for that award............professionalism sh*t i have been taken by a real professional a league of deception and familial wierdness that i cant even fathom.............
i didnt really want her to play the song lucille one night at a local piano bar.............should have seen the fight that caused yes my big heart was breaking............... i need a good loving woman who i can kiss with true passion not a provocative borderline o yes guys in case your wondering off course she finds your sexual picadillo and exploits it.... yes she will do what you want........... but i wonder after the marriage if that will change................ so you all stay tuned and watch as i ruin my career my life and my self respect............ so when you ask how to stay in love with a bipolar,,, i tell you run run forest run... yes the girl in forest gump was borderline......... why are there so many why are they soo good looking what is this i am smart super educated i cant understand it yes i am tired ..............................................when she is on her high i feel like we are on the truman show.................
I like the one comment the guy wrote about suggesting drugs to deal with them............ funny.............. i know that the guys before me with her were on drugs...................... yes i know what your thinking i am attractive i am extemely intelligent but my friends i am no match for a bipolar borderline woman.................. i understand why kurt cobain was out in the greenhouse all of the time................. did i mention that my house was shot by a cabbie who was obsessed by her... did i mention i saw her old boyfriend trying to have 3 somes on craigslist while they did coke..... gross gross gross. i dont even kiss her passionately i dont even think i kiss her.................. she has premature and multiple orgasms ( probably a dopamine thing) it feeds my stupid ego.. i am sure...........i am getting deeper and deeper yes i got engaged...................... yes the priest who is friends with the family questioned if i knew the "unique and interesting family i was about to marry into..................... she didnt even get it...........off course water seeks its own level but i know i am somewhat crazy (good crazy)....... but i have found out what bad crazy is.............. yes there are the times she has thrown my ring 4 times........... not that i am counting.............. yes she amazingly finds a way to blame me for every fight...........last fight was because her friend is pregnant.................. o yes her friends one word s**ts boring party girls with no depth.............. yes she wants a baby i know that she will go nuts when the placental progesterone drops.. after all that must be why her father kept her mom pregnant (10 times) did i tell you she worked as a waitress in a strip club .......... o and the letters from convicts and the jokes about the condom fishbowl that she and her friends had at her college apartment............. yes to the guys reading she is very hot.. .............did i mention the inappropriate dressing.......... asking her to not show off her tattoo at my hospital awards banquet was a real treat... let me tell you................. had they know who that pretty girl in the red dress next too me was,,, i doubt i would have been elected for that award............professionalism sh*t i have been taken by a real professional a league of deception and familial wierdness that i cant even fathom.............
i didnt really want her to play the song lucille one night at a local piano bar.............should have seen the fight that caused yes my big heart was breaking............... i need a good loving woman who i can kiss with true passion not a provocative borderline o yes guys in case your wondering off course she finds your sexual picadillo and exploits it.... yes she will do what you want........... but i wonder after the marriage if that will change................ so you all stay tuned and watch as i ruin my career my life and my self respect............ so when you ask how to stay in love with a bipolar,,, i tell you run run forest run... yes the girl in forest gump was borderline......... why are there so many why are they soo good looking what is this i am smart super educated i cant understand it yes i am tired ..............................................when she is on her high i feel like we are on the truman show.................
Having bi polar is very scary for all that is involed. I know its hard on the partner but you have no idea what we have to go through. One minute your feeling like a super hero and the next you feel worthless. What we act like doesnt have anything to do with if we love you or not. Does that mean that we dont deserve to be loved? It takes a strong partner to handle us.
Having bi polar is no fun for anyone. We hate putting or partners through this. We cant help it its so scary for us as well. Its like one minute you feel great and the next its like your worthless. It takes a strong partner to love us; we do deserve to be happy.Dont give up on the one you love.
Look bi polar people on medication are way better at art,sure they might get angry, or throw things, etc... But I have a friend who is bipolar, She's the nicest kindest person I've met, she can control herself very well. Not mentioning names, but she's really cool. So you better respect them, because they go through alot more than others. Ok guys pull off your hats to those who try to do things the right way.
henryrosai
I loved your post ...for what its worth I would like to add my last 10 years
met Bipolar 2 bloke at a new job I started ....made friends then he came onto
me with all the typical charisma etc most interested & intriqued by who I was
little did i know what this innocent meeting each week would turn into
he left his then partner , for me but not entirely ..it was never entirely
he asked me to marry him within 2 months of meeting ..when stupid me agreed
he moved into a new house with a complete female stranger within days .. and started the long
periods of silence that he excells at .
shortly after he moved in with her , he then went on a 2 month holiday and me as his fiancee
was not contacted ..but told I was a stalker for trying to ring him , and for wanting to know his movements
so I could organise my time and life around his take offs in the car , boat , plane you name it he was always running
from someone ..mostly women he had taken advantage of and then being smashed in the face for arguing with them
3 months after he had asked me to marry him ..I had spent all up... approx 3 days with him .
I called off the supposed wedding after I found him folding the other females underwear on his bed.
as soon as I called it off he went into a rampage that lasted 3 weeks , tried to walk in front of a car , pulled the handbrake on my car
when i was doing 120klm on freeway ..told me I would never see my kids again etc etc and basically threatened to end my life in an instant.
the long road continued with a maze of arguments all started and finished by him , which included cheating, lying , sneaky phone behaviour , phone calls from crying women , poems written to me declaring undying love one day & the next death threats & nasty texts that would kill any loving feeling whatsoever
the text wars became extreme intermittingly changed with abuse , screaming and yelling like a childish tantrum if i dared to doubt his loyalty. the same thing said over & over & over to the point your head is spinning with so much confusion you are quite sure you are going crazy as well ..& told you are seriously sick with mental illness to hustify his behaviour along with creating self doubt to confuse you entirely. :'(
blamed for every mistake that he made including all the arguments , walked out on so many times it became like a peanut butter sandwich ..nights , weekends , months spent with other women playing sexually deviant games , and then abused for questioning his behaviour whilst unmedicated ...meds never taken or thrown out because the evil doctors were trying to kill him
screaming fits that lasted for hours then interrupted with deborched ideas of bondage and 3xsomes ..demands of sexual favours , toys from sex shops , put downs from not wanting to participate in weird sexual pleasures :-P
complete change of heart for you after a few days ,...you become boring so are trashed and ignored for weeks, months , years on end to allow him to meet and seduce new women who had no idea of his illness or me as his GF ...chased and hunted down after being abused in a restaurants because i dared to question his infidelities ..yelled at for hours whilst trashing all belongings including his sh*t hole car that his parents gave him ..filled to the roof with empty takeaway cartons and cigarette packets
wacky weed & cigarettes consumed by the tonne .. :-S
lunatic behaviour at his work and flirting with work colleques to the point of getting the sac for sexual harrassment..losing the jobs would be blamed on me because i dared not to trust if he would even come home at night .
jealousies and insecurities that were impossible to deal with , that were then twisted into being my fault as well ..the entertainment continues for himself because he is perfect and everyone else and imbisile . put downs to the point of me questioning my personal
behaviour..ansd wishing it would all end so I could get ' a get out of jail free card '
friends and family discarded to the point of wishing his parents harm so they would die and he could get their money ..claims of sexually perverted behaviour by his parents ??? to the degree of virtually blaming them for molesting him ..non sensical and illogical nonsense conversations that he would create then become hostime if you dared question ...
many new women and dating sites right in front of your face to the point of watching while he drove off to go and live with them because they had more to offer than you ..and they loved him and you didnt ..
consequently the marriage didnt proceed nor did the engagement of which i had to buy him a ring ??? and i didnt get one at all
no presents ever given for birthdays , xmas or anything ..only flowers i ever got were a bunch that he had thrown back at him from another women ..so they were retrieved from the rubbish in the floor of his car along with womens underwear ...
8-|
fits of crying and rage at the same time to the point of forgetting where the car was parked and having to go back in 2 days when he landed from all the wacky weed he smoked by the tonne ...cost of habit skyrocketing to the point of bankrupcy on credit so then why not go and buy 5 of everything you dont need at the supermarket with any spare cash you have left
XD need i continue ..its exhausting he was Histrionic, narcissistic , defiant , sexual deviant , perverted sexual behaviours 8-|
I loved your post ...for what its worth I would like to add my last 10 years
met Bipolar 2 bloke at a new job I started ....made friends then he came onto
me with all the typical charisma etc most interested & intriqued by who I was
little did i know what this innocent meeting each week would turn into
he left his then partner , for me but not entirely ..it was never entirely
he asked me to marry him within 2 months of meeting ..when stupid me agreed
he moved into a new house with a complete female stranger within days .. and started the long
periods of silence that he excells at .
shortly after he moved in with her , he then went on a 2 month holiday and me as his fiancee
was not contacted ..but told I was a stalker for trying to ring him , and for wanting to know his movements
so I could organise my time and life around his take offs in the car , boat , plane you name it he was always running
from someone ..mostly women he had taken advantage of and then being smashed in the face for arguing with them
3 months after he had asked me to marry him ..I had spent all up... approx 3 days with him .
I called off the supposed wedding after I found him folding the other females underwear on his bed.
as soon as I called it off he went into a rampage that lasted 3 weeks , tried to walk in front of a car , pulled the handbrake on my car
when i was doing 120klm on freeway ..told me I would never see my kids again etc etc and basically threatened to end my life in an instant.
the long road continued with a maze of arguments all started and finished by him , which included cheating, lying , sneaky phone behaviour , phone calls from crying women , poems written to me declaring undying love one day & the next death threats & nasty texts that would kill any loving feeling whatsoever
the text wars became extreme intermittingly changed with abuse , screaming and yelling like a childish tantrum if i dared to doubt his loyalty. the same thing said over & over & over to the point your head is spinning with so much confusion you are quite sure you are going crazy as well ..& told you are seriously sick with mental illness to hustify his behaviour along with creating self doubt to confuse you entirely. :'(
blamed for every mistake that he made including all the arguments , walked out on so many times it became like a peanut butter sandwich ..nights , weekends , months spent with other women playing sexually deviant games , and then abused for questioning his behaviour whilst unmedicated ...meds never taken or thrown out because the evil doctors were trying to kill him
screaming fits that lasted for hours then interrupted with deborched ideas of bondage and 3xsomes ..demands of sexual favours , toys from sex shops , put downs from not wanting to participate in weird sexual pleasures :-P
complete change of heart for you after a few days ,...you become boring so are trashed and ignored for weeks, months , years on end to allow him to meet and seduce new women who had no idea of his illness or me as his GF ...chased and hunted down after being abused in a restaurants because i dared to question his infidelities ..yelled at for hours whilst trashing all belongings including his sh*t hole car that his parents gave him ..filled to the roof with empty takeaway cartons and cigarette packets
wacky weed & cigarettes consumed by the tonne .. :-S
lunatic behaviour at his work and flirting with work colleques to the point of getting the sac for sexual harrassment..losing the jobs would be blamed on me because i dared not to trust if he would even come home at night .
jealousies and insecurities that were impossible to deal with , that were then twisted into being my fault as well ..the entertainment continues for himself because he is perfect and everyone else and imbisile . put downs to the point of me questioning my personal
behaviour..ansd wishing it would all end so I could get ' a get out of jail free card '
friends and family discarded to the point of wishing his parents harm so they would die and he could get their money ..claims of sexually perverted behaviour by his parents ??? to the degree of virtually blaming them for molesting him ..non sensical and illogical nonsense conversations that he would create then become hostime if you dared question ...
many new women and dating sites right in front of your face to the point of watching while he drove off to go and live with them because they had more to offer than you ..and they loved him and you didnt ..
consequently the marriage didnt proceed nor did the engagement of which i had to buy him a ring ??? and i didnt get one at all
no presents ever given for birthdays , xmas or anything ..only flowers i ever got were a bunch that he had thrown back at him from another women ..so they were retrieved from the rubbish in the floor of his car along with womens underwear ...
8-|
fits of crying and rage at the same time to the point of forgetting where the car was parked and having to go back in 2 days when he landed from all the wacky weed he smoked by the tonne ...cost of habit skyrocketing to the point of bankrupcy on credit so then why not go and buy 5 of everything you dont need at the supermarket with any spare cash you have left
XD need i continue ..its exhausting he was Histrionic, narcissistic , defiant , sexual deviant , perverted sexual behaviours 8-|
She may be bipolar, but she just sounds confused as hell to me. She doesn't know what she wants. I have very serve bipolar myself, I've been both on & off medication for years. I'm only 19. The thing is, I've learned how to control my emotions at almost all times, yes I slip sometimes, but how she was treating you was just wrong. Bipolar or not. I'd move on.. Let her figure out what she wants and then if you really see a change, go for it. Until then, she needs to learn more about herself and her emotions & get them in check before you work towards a relationship.
henry rosea
Wow what a post ! amazing stuff and so descript.
I had always considered my self to be an emotionally intelligent female when it came to love ..but what i can tell you is I GOT CONNED TOO.
what a shambles , charmed and hunted down by my bipolar ex upon first meeting ..he was infatuated with me and enthralled to the point of stalking . same thing ..asked me to marry him after 3 weeks , disappeared for 2 months came back and argued with me about everything from the way i made coffee to what dress i wasnt wearing !
caused absolute mayhem and confusion in my life to the point where i didnt know myself anymore ...was totally jealous of my kids but interferred with the way I raised them in a critical way .then when he couldnt put me down far enough to where he emotionally wanted me to be he started challenging my job , my family , my friends ..it just went on and on and all in the name of " he wasnt getting enough attention " !!
finally to try and break my spirit , he kept cheating with numerous other women , locking his phone , texts messages all night , cyber connections from gay and porn sites .
not knowing where I was heading after 3 years of absolute HELL ..I broke it off ..then came the suicide threats , the crying & depression to the point where I couldnt cope anymore with trying to rescue him ..my complete life was traumatised by this person who claimed undying love for me one minute then couldnt send enough nasty texts the next .
the last straw came when he dated and started to seduce female number 20 ...then whilst living with me flirted to the point where he moved out of my home into hers ...he packed his stuff with her sitting in his car in my driveway and bolted with her, to live at her place calling me for every name he could and her doing finger motions to me as they drove off .
he told other women I was his ex and god knows what other level the betrayal reached ..when he would then burn the new women ..she would contact me and tell me things he had said about me that were complete and utter fabrications ...stories that werent even true .
then he would run to the next women and start the cycle all over again .
dont miss the yelling , and the abuse from the unmedicated lunatic ... who claimed traditional meds made him fat but smoking weed 24/7 was ok ...work that one out !!! am ashamed to think i actually thought it was love
for the first instance i had no idea what he was doing ..he would tell me we would get married and then disappear for weeks , months
not answer my texts or calls and dare i question what he was doing in his absence . he is allowed to do as he wants , I dont own him , how dare i even ask !!!
got to the point where it wasnt hard to figure out what he was doing ..his phone bills told an horrific story of 1000's of phone calls to different women ..meeting places , text to women ith seductive overtones of how beautiful her eyes were to what sexual position she preferred ...
well it ended thankgod ..but I still had very deep feelings for this man ...of which I could never tell anyone ..cause people thought that he was an absoute fruitloop and how could I be associated with him I must be a lunatic too ...
whats the old saying ..hang round them long enough and its catching !!
well I tried to help this man because i truly did care about his wellbeing ..but it didnt matter what i did he would still treat me like the enermy and all others like the queen . I had to walk away despite caring for him because he just kept trying to hurt me over & over
he was determined to break my spirit ..and wasnt happy until he had ..then he would turn it all around to be my fault ...he told me love was a game to be mastered like chess , he was cocky and arrogant one minute then a blubbering mess the next .
he waisted 100's of 1000's of dollars on business ventures that were doomed to fail but you couldnt tell him until he had maxed out all his credit cards ..he had good jobs but lost them through his flirtatious attempts on the boss's wife .
anyone was fodder for him any female no matter who she was ..he thought he was gods gift to women, and was out to proove it to the world .
his driving was another story again , dont know how many times i shut my eyes and though this is it am never going to see my kids again , if it wasnt on 2 wheels , it was handbrake stands at 150klm an hour in a rage because i had dared to ask what he did the previous weekend when he ignored all my texts ...
the endless nights of tantrums and crying fits that got to a point where my kids wanted to kill him themselves as he behaved worst than a 2year old toddler ...the endless push , pulling games that went nowhere ..and ended with utter confusion and bewilderment was like a living hell on earth ...
I would just like to say after 7 years of thorough devotion to a bipolar man ...my life has been all but ruined , but most of all I would like to warn anyone who is endeavouring to attempt a relationship with these opportunists, DONT do it to yourself you will be sorry
a better description would have to be that these people have ' criminal minds '....and are best left to someone else .
Wow what a post ! amazing stuff and so descript.
I had always considered my self to be an emotionally intelligent female when it came to love ..but what i can tell you is I GOT CONNED TOO.
what a shambles , charmed and hunted down by my bipolar ex upon first meeting ..he was infatuated with me and enthralled to the point of stalking . same thing ..asked me to marry him after 3 weeks , disappeared for 2 months came back and argued with me about everything from the way i made coffee to what dress i wasnt wearing !
caused absolute mayhem and confusion in my life to the point where i didnt know myself anymore ...was totally jealous of my kids but interferred with the way I raised them in a critical way .then when he couldnt put me down far enough to where he emotionally wanted me to be he started challenging my job , my family , my friends ..it just went on and on and all in the name of " he wasnt getting enough attention " !!
finally to try and break my spirit , he kept cheating with numerous other women , locking his phone , texts messages all night , cyber connections from gay and porn sites .
not knowing where I was heading after 3 years of absolute HELL ..I broke it off ..then came the suicide threats , the crying & depression to the point where I couldnt cope anymore with trying to rescue him ..my complete life was traumatised by this person who claimed undying love for me one minute then couldnt send enough nasty texts the next .
the last straw came when he dated and started to seduce female number 20 ...then whilst living with me flirted to the point where he moved out of my home into hers ...he packed his stuff with her sitting in his car in my driveway and bolted with her, to live at her place calling me for every name he could and her doing finger motions to me as they drove off .
he told other women I was his ex and god knows what other level the betrayal reached ..when he would then burn the new women ..she would contact me and tell me things he had said about me that were complete and utter fabrications ...stories that werent even true .
then he would run to the next women and start the cycle all over again .
dont miss the yelling , and the abuse from the unmedicated lunatic ... who claimed traditional meds made him fat but smoking weed 24/7 was ok ...work that one out !!! am ashamed to think i actually thought it was love
for the first instance i had no idea what he was doing ..he would tell me we would get married and then disappear for weeks , months
not answer my texts or calls and dare i question what he was doing in his absence . he is allowed to do as he wants , I dont own him , how dare i even ask !!!
got to the point where it wasnt hard to figure out what he was doing ..his phone bills told an horrific story of 1000's of phone calls to different women ..meeting places , text to women ith seductive overtones of how beautiful her eyes were to what sexual position she preferred ...
well it ended thankgod ..but I still had very deep feelings for this man ...of which I could never tell anyone ..cause people thought that he was an absoute fruitloop and how could I be associated with him I must be a lunatic too ...
whats the old saying ..hang round them long enough and its catching !!
well I tried to help this man because i truly did care about his wellbeing ..but it didnt matter what i did he would still treat me like the enermy and all others like the queen . I had to walk away despite caring for him because he just kept trying to hurt me over & over
he was determined to break my spirit ..and wasnt happy until he had ..then he would turn it all around to be my fault ...he told me love was a game to be mastered like chess , he was cocky and arrogant one minute then a blubbering mess the next .
he waisted 100's of 1000's of dollars on business ventures that were doomed to fail but you couldnt tell him until he had maxed out all his credit cards ..he had good jobs but lost them through his flirtatious attempts on the boss's wife .
anyone was fodder for him any female no matter who she was ..he thought he was gods gift to women, and was out to proove it to the world .
his driving was another story again , dont know how many times i shut my eyes and though this is it am never going to see my kids again , if it wasnt on 2 wheels , it was handbrake stands at 150klm an hour in a rage because i had dared to ask what he did the previous weekend when he ignored all my texts ...
the endless nights of tantrums and crying fits that got to a point where my kids wanted to kill him themselves as he behaved worst than a 2year old toddler ...the endless push , pulling games that went nowhere ..and ended with utter confusion and bewilderment was like a living hell on earth ...
I would just like to say after 7 years of thorough devotion to a bipolar man ...my life has been all but ruined , but most of all I would like to warn anyone who is endeavouring to attempt a relationship with these opportunists, DONT do it to yourself you will be sorry
a better description would have to be that these people have ' criminal minds '....and are best left to someone else .
i have bipolar and my boyfriend didnt really know how to deal with it.... he use to convince himself that he could make it all better. nut he cant we've been together 3 years almost since i was 14 it only seems like yesterday. i have manic episodes and i dont even realize it days were i wanna stay in bed in the dark crying and hurting myself and all he did was shout but now he's come to terms with the fact that im never going to be normal and i may always be this way. just dont ever make her feel bad for what she cant control because its the worst feeling imaginable she cant change that and u just have to love her when shes upset and be there no matter if she tells u to f**k off. :/ i wish someone would have told my boyfriend all this. but try and keep her busy and happy.
I would just like to say that if you have found this page after a google search or similar then please read it in FULL. I have found all the posts on here to be bang true. 100% of everything here i agree with and have experienced myself with my current partner. But please you have to remember that it is not their (the B-P suffers) fault. Rollercoaster is such perfect terminology for untreated high level Bi-Polars.
Just food for thought here to wrap this post up. Any of those out there that has/have fallen in love with a bi-polar - aint it strange how you now feel bi-polar yourself ?
I just broke up with a bipolar gf after 3 years of torture, most cases here display similar SOCIOPATH behaviors. Laws have to be refined for the irresponsibility of bipolar people to get imposed help for stability when it is not present. Might sound cruel but considering amount of damage, incredible amount of time consumption, harm to others, cost of mental hospitals and police resources; It should be except-able. I am not saying lock them away forever, I am saying help them get stability if they are unstable, even if it means imposing help on them. I strongly believe these people can obtain stability and live happy lives as well as love ones, but if they are allowed to let their volatile and dangerous emotions run wild, a happy life for them and their loves ones will not happen. Current local law here in California is 5150 holds only initiate when threat or physical harm to self or others happens, that is not good because of extremes of volatile behavior. Between the start of an episode and till it ends, anything can happen, and not to forget frequency of episodes. Many love ones of bipolar people feed into the sociopathic needs of the illness, and by not setting boundaries episodes can get dangerously out of control, a boundary imposed by refinements of law could limit damage done to themselves and well as others.
Hi all..I'm a 31 year old women with bipolar too.
What really get me down is when you get into a relationship with any body and you tell them you have bipolar they drop you like a hot potatoe .
The man or women have been for warned about the illness and should know them selves weather they can be with you.
Not later into the relationship say i can't cope with it all like most people do. Most of those people are selfcenter and bury their heads in the ground.
I know it must be hard to understand about what the person is going through and a little understanding won't go a miss. I remeber once i had a cruel boyfriend who tryed to make me take medication that the doctor had told me to stop taking because it was affect my bones.
Yes some of these medication have side-effect and yes the doctor can help you find one that suits you.
Most people try to make out that people with mental health problem are monster which we are not. we are not all dangerously out of control.
Even people with out mental health problem go out killing and hurting people their the ones you should worry about..
Hej, I too have a bipolar girlfriend - I love her very much, and it is a long-distance relationship. We have been together for about serveral months now.
I know she is under stress with family problems and the depression can kill emotions too - 2 weeks ago she said she wasnt -sure- if she even loved me or not which has made it stressful for me - I am not sure what to do, especially with it being long-distance - I love her very much so breaking up with her is not an option. I am ok with giving her space too, but does anyone know what else I can do ? It feels like she has drawn further and further away from me over the past few months - I want to connect with her and do what it takes, but I am struggling at this point to find answers.
I know she is under stress with family problems and the depression can kill emotions too - 2 weeks ago she said she wasnt -sure- if she even loved me or not which has made it stressful for me - I am not sure what to do, especially with it being long-distance - I love her very much so breaking up with her is not an option. I am ok with giving her space too, but does anyone know what else I can do ? It feels like she has drawn further and further away from me over the past few months - I want to connect with her and do what it takes, but I am struggling at this point to find answers.
Hey everyone,
I'm glad i cam across this forum, it's made me feel a lot less alone that a lot of people are experiencing the same thing.
I'm a 21 year old girl, and my girlfriend is 36. We met last November after talking for a number of months by text, phone & internet. I'm so in love with her it's unbelievable. She told me right from the start that she had bi polar, and that it was not the easiest thing to deal with, but I told her I was willing to give it a go.
When it's good it's great, she tells me she loves me and will always love me no matter what, and she makes me feel like the most important person on the planet, but when she feels low it's hard to convince her that i'm here and not going to leave her. It's difficult because we live a couple of hours apart, but since we started seeing eachother i've travelled there without second thought and the distance (when we are happy) isn't an issue. She's finished with me a couple of times, lasting a couple of days at most, either because her ex has made her feel awful and she doesn't think she's good enough for me, or because her life is so hectic with her son that she doesn't want me to feel ignored. I've told her this isn't a problem, it won't be forever and we can work around it for now. The problem is, is that if she's having a low mood & feels im too good for her, she finishes with me by text, and every morning i wake up i panic until i get the first text of the day, just in case she's going to finish with me. It's really taken it's toll on me. I used to be really chilled out, laid back and didn't stress out, but lately i've been feeling low, crying (which is odd for me) and feeling constantly sick. I'm permanently attached to my phone incase she calls or texts.
When we are together physically, it's perfect, we spend days just smiling and being happy. She's amazing, she knows me, gets me, better than anyone has and it feels like i've known her all my life.
She's recently been taken into hospital because she needs a rest and isn't coping well, which is ok, and i don't think any less of her for it. But it just puts such a big distance between us emotionally. Her mum is great, and keeps in contact with me daily to let me know how she's getting on, but it's hard not being there for her. I know she needs space and i'm happy to back off and let her get over this low mood, it's just i'm so used to her finishing with me when she's feeling down, that it's making me worry constantly and i just want to make her happy.
My friends have told me to forget her, but they just don't seem to understand that no matter how difficult it is sometimes, she really makes me happy and i love her. I know your probably thinking, she's only 21, she'll get over it, but trust me, i'm more mature than my age probably gives me credit for and have grown up a lot lately, so this isn't some young first love 5 minute wonder.
I don't really know what i came on here for, whether just to get my feelings down in words or to get some advice? I think i just needed to know that i wasn't the only one dealing with this situation.
For anyone new to BIPOLAR, you should prepare yourself for allot of anguish and emotional roller coasters along with enormous amounts of time consumption for the person with illness. There is times that things go really well, almost as if you've met the sweetest person in the world. When the person with illness goes through stress or uses drugs or alcohol, or not taking medication, things can get out of control. When they do prepare yourself for a person you cannot reason with, even in the things that seem to be common knowledge. Prepare yourself to deal with a person with no boundaries or limits when it comes to certain behaviors, in my case it was irresponsibility, no self discipline, and unconscious of consequence. One minute you're dealing with a kind hearted adult, the next it's like a teenager with no sense of responsibility. If you are to make it work with a bipolar person, you will need to keep that person drug free, and have unconditional support.