I feel sick when im near my girlfriend...why?

iv had this problem for a little over a year and a few months ago i swallowed my pride and got help with it, i got referred to some psychiatrist with a fancy name who told me i had anxiety problems, the way i have been working on it is that when i feel anxious i breathe deeply, in for 3 seconds and out for 3 seconds for a while and try to relax, usually finding a distraction works aswel, another thing is that he noticed i always carried a water bottle when i went to see her as something to help combat the feelings and he told me to stop that, he also told me that i get anxious because im thinking about how i don't want to be ill which makes me feel ill then that makes the anxiety worse and so it continues. all of this was a great help to me and we've been getting on great (ps i always talked about it to my girlfriend and she was the one who made me seek help)

Hi! I had a sexual relationship with a boy for a period, we stopped seeing each others, because I was feeling bad abouth myself, felt I wasn't good enough for him, and I had suffered from depression for some years then. After that I met him in the crowd sometimes, and talked to him on the phone once, I got the throwing up feeling theese times, but I really missed the thing we had, thought about him all the time. But even if it's been a year since we where seeing each others and I think about him very much less, I still have dreams about him every night!! there is not a day that he doesn't come up in my mind, but it's like once a day or so. Sometimes I avoid the thoughts by thinking we can't be together because I have to love myself first and he's a bad guy. He haunts my dreams, sometimes I fantasise beeing with him bcause what we had was really amazing. But now I'm trying to forget doesn't work out very well it seams :( :) haha but I hate it:(

Really appreciated what you said. It's ok to feel love for someone. Amen to that.

Please someone tell us a cure. This is killing me. It is ruining my life. It is not love something that makes you hate yourself. Love is supposed to be a good feeling. PLEASE someone reply. I don't know what to do. Doctors aren't taking it serious and I'm afraid of going to a psychiatrist because of those antidepressant and other stuff. Please!

healthy5, I think you should see a medium, because I believe this is on energy level, neither doctors nor psychiatrists knows about that kind of (to me logical explanaitions) for them crap maybee ;) !? I will go to a medium for the first time in my life, I have been thinking about it for like a couple of years, but now I have planned to ask the questions I have that can get no explanaition from this "scientologicalworld". Good luck whatever you do I hope you will understand the feeling you have :)

Angjul, I don't believe in those things, and here where I live is to hard to find a medium.. Please if it helps you or whatever you find out, please let me know it. Thank you.

ok I will ask about this topic, I promise to come back and tell :) !

I think it's kind of a normal thing when you feel close to a girl that you are not married to, because you KNOW it's coming...the inevitable pressure from her to tell you where this relationship is going. NO man wants to be pressured (and sometimes that goes for women ) but we just have the tendency to want to KNOW the answers, to be able to plan our lives and to hear that the guy we love is thinking the same things. Sometimes we just lost patience and NEED to know. I think it's a fair question and it deserves attention and you KNOW it. When you don't deal with these things, you get to feeling sick. I If you DON"T ever talk with your special gf about your future, then it's likely that you are feeling internal pressure...knowing that she is going to want SOMETHING from you SOON...even if she says it's not important. Anyway, I believe it is something women and ,men need to discuss, One other thing...if you are sleeping with this girl, and have NO intention of ever marrying her. you need to STOP...in fact, even if you plan on marrying her you need to stop using her. Tell her that you want to wait...that you want to take your time and get to know her and love her so she feels loved for WHO she is...try that. See if you don't start feeling better. Clear your conscience and start fresh with your girl. Respect her and tell her what your intentions are. You will be glad you did. Otherwise it's just going to go on and on....until she dumps you for not WANTING to take it to the next level. Do the right thing and feel whole and normal agian! 

How about me being in relationship for 4years and not sleeping with him..and still it keeps going on and on.. it sucks

its called ANXIETY, lol i suffer from it, i believe you guys are mistaking the actual feelings. anxiety makes you uneasy and nauseous, and it happens when you worry way too much. I have bipolar disorder and i deal with it everyday. anxiety is also caused by fear as well as fear of an outcome...idk when i started dating my fiancee, i would get anxiety constantly but i have always known i was bipolar and have been diagnosed so i guess i understood my feelings better, but i am sure if i had no idea about my disorder or what anxiety truly is..i would also confuse it with negative nausea against my partner. for me it went away a bit, and my fiancee is amazing and very understanding, try to talk to your partners about it and consult a therapist or even better, a psychiatrist. trust me, once you know the main source of your negative feelings you will understand it all better!!! :D

Does nobody here ever watched South Park?

I know this topic is old by now, but I found it today and it gave me so much hope there are others in my shoes.  I've noticed that the sick feeling is worse when I leave my body energetically, and gets better when I breathe deep and hold my energy deep in my belly.  It's powerfully fabulous, healing even, when we lie back to back in bed, our lower back being like twin souls conjoined.  Perhaps it's all just a sign of the times we live in, as i've never been in this situation before and thought i was in love like this before??  I never want to leave him.  Yet i feel like this is hurting us somehow... this nausea, seems like a sign from the body to make adjustments.  Trying to listen to my body.  Inhabit it more.   

hey man, im 21 and ive had the same condition since i was 13. I havent been able to get over it. I've tried anti-depressants, drugs and counselling. I feel like a pretty average guy too apart from this. If u find a cure / effective remedy please email me.   ***Post is edited by moderator *** Private e-mails not allowed***Please read our Terms of Use

I too have gone through the same thing within 7 months of my relationship with my girlfriend. the first few months was great until the middle of the 7th month where one night I woke up and my heart was beating real fast and I started sweating alot. My body started to tremble as I thought about my commitment with her. It gotten so bad that I broke up with her the next day. We got back together 2 weeks later then broke up because of the feeling. It was pretty much an on and off thing which got me confused " do I really love her or not?" or am I doing this just to make her happy. She told me awhile back that I was just playing with her emotions and I really wasn't its just the fact that whenever I am with her I feel headaches and sometimes sore throat instead of upset stomach. I realized it was due to stress and anxiety and the fact that I was thinking about the relationship too much. Today I am still with her going on 10 months to a year and it has gotten alot better. I don't have anxiety attacks anymore, night sweats have stopped, my vision has improved, my massive headaches have been reduced to just stuffiness in my head and I my throat feels slightly sore whenever I feel stuffiness in my head. My excitement however is not quite there yet do to the stuffiness but I guess that takes time to gain back. Over all it has gotten better so I am at a verge of a breakthrough. Word of advice there is no right or wrong in whatever decision you make just stick to it will work out in the end. If you truly love her atleast try to make it work and if it is too much for you to handle let her know that you still love her but you have to move on and she will understand.

My Dear Friend, I am 20 years old and I have been in your shoes and I know how you feel! :) I met my girlfriend in the UK and i have been with her for 2 years! She was my first girlfriend I slept a whole night in bed with. She was and is my first Love. Since she was my first, I was many times confused of whether I like her, is she the right one, can I live with her,!!! This in the beginning. Then, sometimes I felt sick like you , and i was wondering am i Gay, or am i good for her. P A R A N O I A S S S S S S S *I understood* To make matters worse, I have been smoking weed daily and in the past I took some hard drugs; experimenting. This makes paranoia even worse. I thought I have to solve this orelse it is going to kill me physically and mentally. I stopped over thinking, of whether I like her is she the right one. My mom told me, just live the moment, dont think shit! Because the truth is if I am with my GF and I am overthinking, when i should be relaxed, then how can I Truly enjoy the Moment. I noticed I was getting better! :) During my Drug experimenting, I lost enough weight, to be even skinnier than what I was! My stomach had shrunk and I had no interest in eating more than one meal at night, whatsover. After ending one year of experimenting, for reasons that fit another talk, I had only the eating problem. It followed me for another Year and a half and my parents, girlfriend and friends, were telling me I should eat more, But I told them: ''I have no interest in food, when I think of eating it is as if I am actually eating. '' I had no anorexia or anything, I just didn't like eating! I would get through out the day, alone, with my girfriend, with my bra, friends, family, these sick feeling in my stomache! And I did not know what they were from. I started paying attention when I didnt have these sickly feelings. I did an experiment, without drugs :) '' I woke up in the morning and ate milk and cereals! Very very very slowly,but I ate it. I felt Great!! :) Then during the day I got again this stomach sickness and had a sandwitch! Then I went home and had a soup! Then at night, i had a meal!!'' I was feeling amazing , i was eating small portions but I was eating.! I am now gaining weight, but in a controllable manner, with workout and extreme sports. I now have an interest, for vegetables, fruit, and good food! I appreciate it! '' We are like a car, if you do not feed it Gas how can it run?''' The same with people, If we do not eat and keep healthy, Body and Mind, like my Ancient Greek Ancestors said. If we do not do this simple thing, We feel bored, depressed, moody, bored, unmotivated, generally bad! Run your body with fresh eating slowly! like my second experiment, and eat slowly! I hated food, I really did! But now, I am even interested in cooking and experimenting in the kitchen area! Do not overthink about your girflriend, if you do not want to give her away, then you Love her, Why are you keep fidgeting with it, let it go , take it slow, and let the good time rolL! :) I hope I helped you My Dear Friend! :)