I want a baby, but my husband "isnt ready"

There is nothing unsafe about having children after 30. If you want something else its just because you want it and that is reason enough for him to listen

I agree with you my boyfriend is the same way.

Hey there everyone! As everyone says, I am glad other people are struggling as well. My husband and had sex twice in the past two days completely birth control free because I asked him if he was ready and he said yes! However, I asked a few times if he was really considering it or if he was just in the moment. Ha assured me he wanted this. Then, the following day he he came home and was all stressed out and panicked so he swayed me into using a plan B, I have used one before we were married which seemed more acceptable, also, I have some health conditions I have been working on and I was excited that my body was in check! I cried the whole time I took it and he felt, what seemed like nothing. Some part of me hopes it doesn't work, but it feels like he will freak out and run away or something. It makes me feel like he doesn't think I am good enough! I always have baby fever, but I was the first one to mention a two-year plan which apparently stuck a little too much...now I have changed my mind and come back down to earth. Now he is wanting to do all of these things on a list that seems u realistic to complete in two years. He also mentioned pushing it out later until the list is complete.

Well, I hope things work out with your wife. There are women out there (obviously) that really want children.

I have used Plan B before, but we WEREN'T married. ** typo

I'm 23, my fiance is 22. We are getting married on our 7th anniversary next year. I'm very maternal, love children! Always catching myself looking at parents with their children and dreaming. At the shops I gravitate towards anything to do with children, its embarrassing my fiance cuffing his hands around my face so i have tunnel vision just so he can get me out of the area. We have been over and over the topic of starting our family and like you girls are also experiencing him having alot of excuses e.g. finances, age, travel, owning our own home. I have the same mentality as my mum" you can never afford a baby, another many other families get around the above issues so theres no excuse". He's indicated he does what childre but not yet...urgh I love him I really do and we don't have any othet issues in our relationship. I'm afraid that one day I'll just have enough of the excuses and walk away and I really don't want that but then again I want to bare my own children and there is a timeline for women. Rant over.

I am also 24...my husband and I just recently got married. I want a baby, he doesn't also for "money reasons" and he says it's too soon...but I agree that it takes 9 months for the baby, and that's 9 months to plan, save, ext...... He wants to wait another 2 years and I flat out told him I can't wait that long! He doesn't understand why I'm in a rush for a baby. I told him I don't want to be old when I start a family, I want to start a family young. I'm ready to teach my children what my parents fought me. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't be the way I am now. I'm grateful. And patiently waiting for a baby!!!
~Dea

Im 23 turning 24 and i was on the depo injection for 9 years and i wasnt aupposed to be on it at the age of 13. 18 months ago we discovered cysts on my ovaries and the doctor wanted me off birth control to try and regulate my cycle and to filter out the bad eggs. My doctor prodicted that i should be able to fall pregnant by the age of 25.

My boyfriend and i of 4 1/2 years went on a lovely 5 week holiday to America and upon our return i was late on my cycle which in the last 9 months were beginning to be regular for me at 21 days. When we landed i waited another 2 weeks and started to realise that i was getting cramps but nothing. I told mh boyfriend that something is wrong and im late. He said you cant be pregnant, you dont need to have a test you have just skipped a month. Against his wishes i got a test and it was really clear that i was pregnant.

I went to the doctors and it was confirmed. I was 5 weeks pregnant and got a ultrasound and found out my due date.

When i told him that i was pregnant he was didnt react well and told me that we need to get rid of it and when i asked why he said that we are not ready and cannot afford it.

I was annoyed and emotional. This could be my only chance to be a mum and he wants me to get rid of it. I am against abortion unless it was a rape child or was going to have a severe disability. I was heart broken.

He is very hot and cold one minute he wants it next he is pushing abortion. I dont know what to do. He has put me in a position that i dont know what he is going to do either stay and man up or is he going to leave and regret it. Of course i do not want to get rid of it.

Has anyone else experienced it. Im currently 8 weeks along and i dont know what to do. I would like to do this with him and have bis support but if i have to ill do it alone.

I have explained money is no issue ill put money aside for schooling and stuff in years time and that i do not intend on having a long time off work. But it doesnt seem to change his mind.

Only my mum knows and she has already gone crazy with buying items and has most of my nursery stuff brought second hand. which i dont mind.

Please help!!

Wow, this post was a god send. I've felt so alone about this. I am 22 yrs old I've only been with my fiancée for a year (not that long I know) but I am so more than ready to have a child. I had a miscarriage at 18 and ever since then there has been a void in my life. I have finally found a man that wants to be with me for the rest of my life. I always pictured that I would get engaged, married and then maybe a year after start trying to conceive. My fiancée wants me to wait 5 years and then see if we are "financially stable" enough to have children. Since I have already had a miscarriage that worries me, and there are also a lot of problems in my family when it comes to having children older, not to mention TWINS. I've tried to make him understand my view on this and he just won't budge...it makes me crazy sometimes and very depressed. I'm just glad that I know I'm not alone.

Wow these replies really make me feel as if I'm not alone

I'm so happy to have found this post. I really needed this to see that I'm not in this alone and that many other people are going through or have already been through all this.

I have a pretty similar story, but different as well. I'm from the US and my husband from Canada. We've been together for 6 years now and married for 3. I'm 23 and he's 28. I feel really ready to be a mom and start a family. I've felt ready for quiet some time. For a time I understood, we lived pretty far apart, but as of the beginning of last year I landed as a resident in Canada and we've been together since then. We've had a place of our own since May of last year (2015) and I feel like we're ready. We are both employed full-time so we could definitely afford it. But he keeps telling me he's not ready and he just doesn't understand what it feels like from my side. I saw a baby at work last week and I almost burst into tears. I have friends that have kids or are pregnant (even a friend that has 2 kids and i now pregnant with her third). And I want that for me.

I know exactly how all of you feel. I hate waking up knowing my fiance isnt ready to have a child with me. Everyone has their purpose in life and call me crazy but i honestly feel like mine is to be a mother. Nothing else in this world could make me happier. Anytime i try talking to him about starting a family its not a good time or we arent stable enough finacially. It kills me seeing all my friends with babies. I have become depressed due to this fact and im losing connection with my fiance. I love him with all my heart but it hurts my heart to know hes not ready or sometimes he even says he doesnt want one. I want to be happy but i dont know how...

I was in my 22and have my son

I am almost in tears. I have been struggling with this issue for 4 years. I am 27, my husband is 29, and we have been together for 12 years and together 7. Yep, we met in high school, and went to the same college, got married young, etc. BUT we agreed to have kids within a couple years of getting married.
I finally reached my personal limit and had a major breakdown a year ago. So now, all of the reasons he had before for not having kids has doubled... I'm tired of living on his timeline. Don't I get a choice? I have been waiting for 6 years!
Anyway, thanks to all of you for sharing. I don't feel like I'm all alone in the world. *sigh* If anyone comes up with a breakthrough on how to convince my husband to let us start a family, let me know.

I feel the same way. It's hard to get up everyday when one of the things you want most in life seems completely unreachable. I love my husband but at some point he needs to meet me somewhere in the middle. It is becoming something that we fight about more than talk about now.