I was on suboxone for 2 years and just recently got off of it. It's been really hard, but I'm now on day 52 and starting to feel human again. I started on 8mg and tapered over a year down to 2mg and jumped off. My doctor prescribed me clonidine, phenobarbital, robaxin, some klonzepam (7 days worth), bentyl (for stomach), and visteril (which I couldn't take because it made me hyper). I found the most useful one to be the clonidine. I took that for about 4 weeks. The first 3 weeks was the worst. I laid in bed and couldn't sleep, yet couldn't get up. I wasn't hungry but forced myself to eat. I would kick my legs all night when trying to sleep and it would really hurt. The first week was the worst and it slowly got better. Week 4 the mental stuff kicked in and I found myself wanting to kill myself. I still couldn't sleep well. I ended up in the crisis center and got on cymbalta and remeron to sleep. What a godsend that remeron is. Also, at 4 weeks I was able to get up and go out finally so I started going to meetings. I got myself a sponsor, a home group and have started working the steps. I don't know what I'd do without AA. I go to AA because I like the group but I'm a total addict. I I'm almost at 8 weeks and I still feel a little foggy, like there's not much joy going on in my head. Meetings help with this. I feel elated after hearing a good message. I have 2 kids and it's been hard on them but I keep trying to better myself for their sake. On week 4 my doctor wanted to put me back on suboxone and taper me down. I'm so glad I didn't listen to him. Be careful with what doctors say. Not all of them are right. I know I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel for a month, but there is light. I promise. Keep with it and don't give up. You just have to be patient. It'll come. I wanted to die but am now wanting to live again. Hopefully this helps someone. They told me about 2 months to feel normal again, but I know that it will take longer for my brain receptors to start firing again. Time heals all! :-)
Always good to hear someone sing the praises of working the steps and attending regular meetings. For months after coming off, I really struggled to find any happiness. I was/am on a lot of the drugs you mentioned- specifically Clonidine, Vistaril, and I'm also taking Buspar. They help with the physical discomfort but the toughest part, as you mentioned, is typically the mental challenges. Finding hope and joy and finding that 'new way of life'.
I've found that the most rewarding part for me is giving back. Someone once told me that an acronym for hope is
H- Help
O- Opening
P- Peoples
E - Eyes
Without regular meetings and the fellowship I have in the program, life would be a lot more of a struggle.
Let me tell you first of all withdrawal symptoms Do Not last 5 years that is BS even from the cellular and biological level impossible. But it takes 60 some days . Post Acute Withdrawal Symptoms or pAWS is a theory and not a fact. only paws my friend had when he had to detox , was low energy but gets better starting 20-30 days . No you do not have Suboxone in your system, what is happening at the cellular level is your opiate receptors are down-regulating. When you put exogenos opiate in your system number of opiate receptors increase, then now that you are not taking opiates , there are many empty receptors, so slowly the number of those receptors are decreasing, and this happens from day 3 to 10. This up-regulation and down-regulation, has an effect on your mood. So be patient with detox, imagine you will be opiate free just like others and you could go back to the life you had, no dependency on opiates. After two weeks if you do not feel better and cant sleep see you doctor , good luck , eat something anything. Take nice hot water shower, watch a good movie. I know it feels like everything is boringgggggg but eventually you start finding them intersting everything in life interesting again
PAWS varies from person to person and is greatly exaggerated at times because people are still trying to adjust to life without drugs. Things taste, sound, feel, and even smell different. It's amazing how good music sounded to me when I came off of everything. It got me through some rough times.
Having jumped off of Klonopin after 15 years, I can tell you that I still have bouts with some PAWS. I'm not sure how much is the Klonopin and how much is the suboxone. One day I hope to be off of the maintenance meds like Vistaril and Clonidine. All in good time. Right now I'm just looking forward to picking up my 9 month key tag in a week.
Dont want to burst ya bubble mate but the real mental sh*t comes on around 6 months (if you last that long), believe me and everybody who has quit suboxone, thats when it REALLY starts, at the mo your just thinking "yeah quit sub for couple of weeks to month" so am all good, but nooooooo it gets worse...Wish I did not have to say this but its true, do you know how many people have tried to take their own life because of PAWS from suboxone? enough, any user over 3 months use of suboxone is suicidle to the MAXIMUM granted.
There are stories of PAWS lasting 4 years, but many people cant be bothered to outweigh it, so relapse, records show %1 of people come off sub and those are short term users. There are more relapsed after quitting suboxone then methadone withing last 7 years, considering methdone is old now, so this is very scary.Dont want to burst ya bubble mate but the real mental sh*t comes on around 6 months (if you last that long), believe me and everybody who has quit suboxone, thats when it REALLY starts, at the mo your just thinking "yeah quit sub for couple of weeks to month" so am all good, but nooooooo it gets worse...Wish I did not have to say this but its true, do you know how many people have tried to take their own life because of PAWS from suboxone? enough, any user over 3 months use of suboxone is suicidle to the MAXIMUM granted.
That really sucks to hear.I was on sub for almost three years then realized I was in the same boat as before I never had enough always looking for more. So I stopped I should have tapered down but didnt. It was very hard I didnt go to my doc for any meds to help just quit. I am now 30 days in still with no energy,and with two kids that is no fun. I got on hear to hopefully find im almost done with all this hell,but it does not look like im close,but no matter i have to make it work for my family.
Your a glass is half empty kinda person, aren't you? You're saying that studies show that only 1% of people come off of suboxone? That's just completely absurd. For me, 6 months was better than 5 - wihch was better than 4 - which was better than 3. Every person is different. I'm getting awfully tired of people painting this picture of doom and gloom and suicide. I'm not saying it should be Norman Rockwell but recovery isn't something that happens - it's something that you have to work on. Good luck - it's worth it
I've detoxed cold turkey 3 times off Suboxone and it's tough for sure. Not as bad as Methadone but real close second to it. It all depends on how much you took and for how long but most cases last between 14-42 days. 42 if you jump off at 8mg and 14 days if you taper correctly. The best way to get off is to switch to short acting opiates and be on them for 1 month tapering from a set dose like 40mg oxycodone or hydrocodone a day to as low as you can get then go cold turkey and have about 30-60mg methadone to stave off the withdrawal and you should be fine after 3 days of methadone and no shorter opiates. Then maybe some Neurontin for 2-3 days only. Voila, hardly any withdrawal. The problem is most doctors, if any, will taper you this way because they probably think the short acting opiates are what got you there in the first place but that's how it's done folks. Works everytime if you can get a docotr or friend to help you. Worst withdrawal of my life was off methadone and benzos at the same time, I thought I was going to die and wanted to commit suicide. I'm on Suboxone again for the 4th time and staying on it because I just cannot function without something in my body after 26 years of messing my chemistry up. Sad but at least there's something to take for now. Too dang expensive though because I have no insurance.
wow, after reading so many posts. it is good to know im not losing my mind and that its just the godam withdrawal. like most. ive been using subs pretty regularly for 2 years. im curious if anyone else experience what im about to share. the first 3 months of subs was amazing. i remember the first day i took a sub. my heroin addiction had/has ravaged my life so subs seemed like a miracle. well after the first 3 months or so. the subs, obviously worked. but after an hour or 2 or 3. i would get masssssssssive cravings to get high. before id take my sub dose, if i felt those cravings. i could control my thoughts and make the conscience decision to just not go use. but once i took the sub. after an hour or to. its like it gave me that insatiable urge to get high. it would usually work out and id use right as the sub is wearing off and get high. ive even used countless times, KNOWING i physically cannot get high but because of the crazy/powerful cravings i use anyway. anyone else relate to that? so my suboxone turned into my crutch when i was broke, or needed a few days sober for a UA or whatever it may be. over ther the course of 18 months id say my sub use was all over the board but not consistent, and i didnt ever take more than one. in fact the last 6 months leading up to my complete sobriety. i was using. .1 - .4 mg at most. at one point i was taken .1, the tiniest u could break the film into. and that 1/8th of a film kept me well. all day. for about 2 weeks i did that and thought sweet im done with heroin and now ill be done with suboxone. i remember feeling a little crummy getting off subs. but nothing to be concerned with. in the 2 years i have had subs. clinically i was never ever warned it was addictive physically, that youd withdrawl. so when i stoppped takin it and the with drawal hit. i was like wtf. after that i knew i needed detox. so for about a months i would use heroin 2 days a week and subs the other 5. more or less. never more than .4mg. when i found out sub detox can take weeks. months. i was. i was dumbfounded. if you are dead set on recovery. and you truly mean to quit and want to detox and be done with it. used ur opiate for like 2 weeks. and detox from that. i would much rather detox n be done in 3-5 days and BAM feel myself and move on with my life. vs feeling ill for weeks.
I used my last .2mg on midnight on tuesday 3/12/13 and went to medical detox that day. i was in detox for 5 days. all the doctors and nurses assured me. i would be FINE and the withdrawl was at its end. then they talked me into a VIVITROL shot. which is like suboxone in the sense of you physically cannot get high of opiates. vivitrol is a shot that lasts 30 days, none addictive, none opiate. just a plain old opiate blocker. so when i took this shot. i thought yay ive won, now i cant use no matter how bad i try and i will learn to live life normal again yayyyy! the hospital had setup an inpatient for me ( my 4th ) for a few days from discharge. gave me some meds for residual withdrawal and off i went.
that night. it hit me. for it was this tight/knot/ with a burning sensation in my chest. wasnt painful but uncomfortable/cant sit still for more than a moment/defenitly cannot sleep. i was exhausted, had barely slept for the 2 days leading to my discharge so on this night. i was so so so so tired all i wanted was to sleep but the vivitrol kicked up my withdrawl and it wouldnt let me. i have had to call tx center and schedule my date a few days off to give me more time. it is now day ten for me from the suboxone. that crazy uncomfortable feeling in my chest left after day 7. if it wasnt for the meds i can totally see how people would commit suicide. especially in my position, i was withdrawling and wanted so so so so bad for it to end except i also knew i had the shot so i couldnt get high! was a mental mind f**k. but in the end. i kinda feel like this is payback, for all the pain and chaos that has ensued to those i love. and if so i am paying on such a small scale. again, im on day 10, i still cant sleep without taking meds. and during the day, my hands and bottom of my feet are constantly sweaty and clammy unless i take the meds, but i hate feeling all out of it. i just want to f*****g be sober godamit. ive done this so many times. this is the first time i am doing it soley for myself. im doing this regardless. but if i only knew about suboxone withdrawal.
yes HEROIN withdrawal is much much more intense. but personally. id rather suffer severely over a few days vs suffer slowly over weeks. and if u go to detox. when u leave. the pain is over. your just left with the paws and staying sober part. but if you really want it. if you trulyy desire and are willing to go to any length to be sober. staying sober isnt as difficult as its made out to be. its all us addicts that arent rdy that try to get sober n fail over n over n over x10 that make STAYING sober look difficult. it u want it more than anything. you wont even think twice about using. i know cuz ive seen it over n over. people used for years, jail, institutions, just hardcore addicts, way worse than me, than one day. they just stop and never use again. anyway. ive rambled. suboxone is the less of the two evils the other being the opiates themselves ( heroin ) but dam i wish i had known about this when i started. day 10 and i still cant sleep without meds and then only sleep 4 hours, cant eat, nothing sounds fun, i feel trapped and dont know what the f**k to do, i hate this. praying this will end soon. anyway. thanks if anyone took the time to read this. and good luck to you if u detox from subs.
see yall on the other side, the completely detoxed/sober side :)
Not to be an as****e to everyone, but I was on oxy's for 3-4 yrs. Then subs for 5 yrs. My Doc doesn't believe in withdrawal (he likes taking his patients money) so he tells peeps to keep taking at least 2mg a day for the rest of their f*cking lives. I thought that was BS, so I stopped after tapering down from 16mg/day to 4mg/day. I'm on day 15 and my physical withdrawals (stomach trouble, hot cold flashes and sweats, etc.) those w/d's were done in 3-4 days and it wasn't all that bad. The rest I've found is all in your head. If you think your body is aching then it will ache. When you feel like you're crazy then you are crazy. Go to N/A meetings if that's your cup of tea. Get support from friends. What has helped me the most is forcing myself to go places and do things. When I exercise I start to feel a world of difference because my mind is occupied. Anyone going through it just remember that it'll suck for a few days, after that a positive outlook and some motivation is all you need to quit bitching and be normal again. Good luck to all.
God Bless,
Trav
Good luck to you, you're through the physical sh*t, just get your mind right at all cost
But buprenorphine damages the brain to the extent of never ever feeling normal ever again, the depression starts around 7 months believe or not, and just gets worse. I was 13 months off suboxone and I almost put a gun to my head, but instead I relapsed on methadone..Those 13 months were living hell I promise you. I was only on 1mg a day for 2 years, tapered to 0.125 and suffered very badly, particularly mentally.
I have not known anybody to come off suboxone and stay clean. Something is wrong with this drug and it will only be a matter of time before they take it off the market..We are basically fked on it. And off it.
Trav, you aren't an as****e at all. I think you are one of the only ones on here telling it like it is. What you said is exactly correct..".If you think your body is aching then it will ache. When you feel like you're crazy then you are crazy." I came on here hoping to find some positive stories of success and so far all I have done is SCARED MYSELF TO DEATH!!!! I was on oxy, vics or percs for about 4-5 yrs (very heavy at the end) and then realized I really had to quit b/c I just could not live like that anymore. I have a wonderful husband, family & friends and am a doggy mom of four and the things I was doing to keep myself from going into wds was putting all of those wonderful things in jeopardy. So I told my hubby and a few close friends what was going on ( I just didn't have the guts to tell the rest of my fam...yes I know I should have but I just don't want to see that disappointed look) and decided to go to an outpatient recovery center. That is where they introduced me to my latest crutch, suboxone. Yep they called it a miracle like all the other money hungry drs out there. Said it was the only way for me to stop and never once told me anything bad or about how long and hard withdrawal could possibly be. I have been on it now for almost 2 years! To me that is just another addiction. I have never ever taken more than 8mgs per day and am currently down to 2mgs per day. I only have four 2mg strips left and now after reading all this stuff I am so scared to quit. But I absolutely have to do it. I want me back...the me who loved to be outdoors with my dogs, who loved riding motorcycles (street & dirt), loved music, loved to be with people, loved SO MANY THINGS. Now I just do the bare minimum around my house and I haven't seen some of my friends in over a year. This is not a miracle drug. I am not living. So here I am, hating this drug and I refuse to get anymore. I have no insurance and most Drs don't take insurance anyway...just cash and I don't have the money to even get anymore. Now I'm scared...but then I saw your post and you reminded me that I have to stay out of my own head. If I want to beat this I CAN! If I have to sob and cry and tell myself that over and over for 3 days or 3 months so be it. If you think you are depressed then you'll feel that way. Yes it is physical but I agree with you that it is also a mental "head game" that you have to play with yourself. THINK POSITIVE no matter how bad your body aches, no matter how bad you want to curl up in a ball and die you absolutely have to remember why you are doing this, why you are willing to go through this. Remember that beautiful person you used to be before you ever took that 1st drug. You want him/her back and you will walk through this fire to get him/her. Make yourself do the things that made you happy before drugs. So what, your tired and your achy, get up off your ass and go for a walk, play cards with fam/friends, just try to enjoy whatever it is that made you happy and you WILL BE HAPPY AGAIN!!!! Yes it is easier said than done but that is how it is done. That is my plan I guess and thanks Trav for the not so terrifying post. I have a question for you though; you said you went from 16mg down to 4mg/day. Is that where you quit...at 4mgs? Coz everyone on here is saying it is impossible to even quit at 2mgs/day. People are even saying you'll commit suicide after like 7mths. Really positive reinforcement there. I do not believe the sub wd is what causes a person to do something like that. Those people surely had to have other, deep depression issues. If you have any other suggestions or things you have done that may be helping I would greatly appreciate it....that goes for anyone out there who has any advice. If you can keep me posted on days ahead. Do you think I should just go ahead and quit right now at 2mgs or should I taper these last four 2mg strips as far as possible? Thanks in advance for any help. Jessica - decemberstar
Hey guys I'm on day 6 of suboxone WD. It's been rough to say the least. I took 8-10 Vics/ultram/Percs a day for 3-4 yrs. I weigh under 100 lbs. I needed the pills on my nightstand the night before in order to get out of bed in the AM. I am a prof. Work 9-5. Then I met this doc & he prescribes me 60 8mg pills and directions said take 1-2 a day. frikkin as****e. I was higher than I've ever been & I've been pretty high in my lifetime. So I started to break them in little pieces and they worked. I wasn't doing research on the Internet at the time. Just figured it out. Anyways, I switched to films when the coupons came out. So I took suboxone for the past 3 yrs. I tapered off but that doesn't mean much. It's already attacked the receptors in my brain. I have been bed ridden for 6 days, aching, stomach problems & profound fatique. I took leave of absence from work & have family taking care of my life pretty much. I had to tell everyone the deal. You will need Clonidine or Guanfacine to assist with the WD. I was also prescribed Gabapentin. Here's a tip that has been a god sent - heat patches from drug store. I put them on my legs & back & also heated blanket, heating pad & long HOT showers. Once I get the energy I'm going for a massage unless you have someone at home. You can't do this cold turkey. It took me calling at least 75 doctors in my state before I found this amazing doctor who wants to do an exposé on suboxone doctors & how it's been mis-handled. This is NOT a miracle drug. Suboxonedestroyed me. I was better off going cold turkey offVicodin which I have done years ago & it was 1-2 days & thenperfectly fine. Back to normal. I'm looking at months before I'm myself again after doing all this research. Best of luck Jess & Trav. I'll check back soon. Oh and I'm taking a lot of sleep meds doubling up and sleeping days on end. The WD are unbearable. Just sleep for days if you can. Then they say you'll have to do exercise to build up the endorphins ...something like that. I am no where near that. I crawled on hands & knees this morning to bathroom cause no one was around. I am determined to do this. I want my old self back!! There's more but I'm pretty shot right now. Ttyl