I feel sick when im near my girlfriend...why?

I'm 30. I've been through some serious relationship Sh*t in my life. I'm divorced as of 2 years ago. I never moved on with anyone else until 3 months ago. It only lasted 2 months because I felt the same feeling of "sick". But mine started out as irritation. He would call me all the time and it he made himself WAY too available. I began to see him as "needy" and "clingy" which was actually true. He was trying to move way too fast. I told him I wasn't ready for that kind of serious committment and that we needed to slow down and I had asked him to back off. He didn't take it well. His reaction kinda confirmed the "sick" feeling and that I wasn't ready to be in a relationship. I then realized it wasn't only him that was making me feel like that. It's also my own internal and psychological issues because there's still some hurt and baggage inside me from my past. Now when I think of love, it makes me feel sick to my stomach. The thought of getting married again and having a committment with another guy makes me feel sick to my stomach and the thoughts "ugh! ew!" come to my mind. I started my 2nd week of counseling this week. My goal is to reset my emotions and thoughts so I can learn to be with someone again (someone NOT clingy and needy). I hope this helps. If anyone else can relate I would be happy to see another response

Hi, I'm a counsellor. First time I have been on this site. Sounds like you are suffering from anxiety when you are around your girlfriend. The anxiety of losing her. It would be good to talk to her about it. You could also learn meditation which helps you live in the moment, not worrying about the future because there is nothing you can do about it anyway. Just take deep breathes slowly in and out when you get the attack this will ground you and tell yourself "Everything is alright right here, right now. She wants me with her right here right now". Keep repeating it over and over until you feel better. It would also help to speak to a counsellor too if you can. I probably won't be on this site again so good luck!

Fascinating discussion though I didn't read it all. I have an answer based on many years and many relationships. Basically it means you are not happy with the relationship. Often it means you feel overcommitted, trapped, or controlled, in which the best thing may be to slow down and get some independence. This is hard to get past, and when you feel it coming on, you need to spend time with yourself or different people or it will grow until you can't stand it anymore. Sometimes it means you just don't get along well, but it's really the same thing, just with a different resolution - breaking up. You might be bored, annoyed, ready for a change, etc - regardless, you feel trapped and you need to admit that to yourself. This doesn't mean you don't care or even love the person. It does mean you need to separate yourself and get back to feeling good. The more honest you are with yourself about this feeling and the quicker you react, the more likely you are to find your way through it without making the wrong choices and hurting both of you even more. When I get this feeling I follow it immediately. I cut back in contact, see other friends, change activities - whatever gets me back to feeling right. If nothing works well, I know it's time to break up. Whatever you do, do not "push through," especially with medications. This will only build resentment hurt both of you much more in the long run.

You are most likely Highly sensitive and taking on her energy, or she is triggering something in you that you are unaware of.

Wow! Sounds like you are love sick. I recently experienced the same kind of thing. I have anxiety though. I really loved this guy with all my heart but I was soo nervous around him that it was discusting. My friend told me about this natural supplement that you can take from the heath food store. It's called L- Tyrosene. It helps with nerves and stress. I used to take 2 an hour before we hung out. it helped me alot. Also though, the guy I was seeing hurt me alot before we started dating so it was kinda my conscience saying red light as well so that might be something as well. Just sayin'.

I just lost my beloved girlfriend, but when we were together it was amazing. Sun, moon, stars, sex on the beach kind of love that they write books and movies about. When we were apart it would kill me...last girlfriend, I was aloof...cool as a cucumber. When my ex cheated I just left. This one is way different, and I felt like a weirdo or something. I was sick inside beyond what seemed reasonable for the circumstances...and towards the end it became horrid...together or apart...same feeling. She left me in a text message three weeks ago stating she was not ready for a relationship. I do not understand it...my boss called me weak willed, and open to the devil...I do not believe that...but now, she will not talk to me anywhere but through a text...now it gets better, then a song...an old icture....all of it...it is killin me...

Hi, I felt really strongly about replying to you, even though this is an old post because I have been in a similar situation! If your body is acting up like this, there is something not right in your relationship with your girlfriend. 1st thing: don't panic about this. Whatever comes next, you'll get through it! 2: tell your girlfriend about your discomfort in a kind way. Open up to her. If there is something worrying you that could be contributing to anxiety, communicate that. 3: talk to people whose opinions you respect: friends, family, teachers, coworkers. If their advice doesn't ring true, don't let that trouble you. Sometimes you have to work these things out for yourself, but it's nice to have support of those you love. 4: talk to a counselor. Even if you don't have insurance for this, you can find counseling at your school, at health clinics, maybe even sex health clinics like planned parenthood for free. 5: This isn't about you or your girlfriend. There is nothing wrong with either of you. Sometimes people beat themselves up about their feelings or project their feelings onto others. Odds are if you have some things to work out within yourself, they will crop up in other relationships and other dynamics in your life, although you might not be aware of it. Even if you feel afraid, insecure or like you need to be 'fixed', let all of these things go and trust that you'll come through this a stronger person who is more self-aware and has healthier relationships across the board! Best of luck!

Your in love hun this is the second stage: Stage 2: Attraction This is the truly love-struck phase. When people fall in love they can think of nothing else. They might even lose their appetite and need less sleep, preferring to spend hours at a time daydreaming about their new lover. In the attraction stage, a group of neuro-transmitters called 'monoamines' play an important role: Dopamine - Also activated by cocaine and nicotine.Norepinephrine - Otherwise known as adrenalin. Starts us sweating and gets the heart racing.Serotonin - One of love's most important chemicals and one that may actually send us temporarily insane. it can also cause people to feel sick, it should just pass as the realtionship goes on but if it gets really bad you could always see someone about it. 

No offence pal, but seriously.........You feel sick when you are with her...sometimes not. Sometimes you feel sick elsewhere....sometimes not. Why do you think she is the common denominator!?!? You are the only common thing in all this. It is you making yourself sick. To entertain the idea that it might be due to being homosexual is a clear sign that you question yourself as why on earth would you think that? Why would you not think you had a tummy bug or something!!! It is so crazy to say that that it would make more sense to think it was morning sickness. You clearly worry about being gay and it is causing you anxiety. I hope you tell your missus this. If not...you really should. It is only fair. Sort it out...mon tae france!!!!

Hey OK ......so....... You are all feeling this way because you ARE IN LOVE.  To those who have pushed their partners away YOU'RE Crazy !!! Listen love isn't all the sweet happy things you always see on TV or read about in books.  Love is the whole thing every emotion magnified 100x sadness to the depths of depression, happiness to bliss, anger to rage, fear til it cripples, all because you know in heart that the one thing you absolutely can not do with out is this person.  I think its a failing of our society that we have found it so foreign to feel anything that we always seek an escape from our uncomfortable feelings.  Just go with them be sad, be happy, be angry, be frightened, - Don't you get it? that's the best part - that we CAN feel, its a gift - treasure it. BTW yes i get the pulling at my gut - I know that I cannot live without her.

I've been dealing with something similar. I have this sometimes, sometimes not. Been with my girlfriend for 7 years! And sometimes I can get this sad, down-feeling, for example if we don't have much to say to each other or if I'm getting bored with compromises. Or it can be that we're out on holiday and everything's supposed to be fantastic, but I have a hard time being in the moment, and start getting unsure about us - even though we know each other so well. The easiest way to descripe it is that since the intuitive feeling of happiness isn't there, I start feeling guilt and sadness, and then it just gets worse. I feel very very guilty, like I'm a liar. But then at other times, we're just hanging out and enjoying ourselves. I hate it when I over-think things, this is just an example. It detaches you from the moment, makes you doubt you can love at all, makes you doubt if you're a socioptath or what - the best word for it is being overconscious about everything. But the difficult part of this is the realization that there has to be some trigger for this - and as I said, one of these triggers for me could be that we're for example out eating, and suddenly we have run out of stuff to talk about (a 7 year relationship... ;-)   ) , and then I start to get conscious about it. And I think that it's not supposed to be like this, we're supposed to have tons of laughs constantly, romantically talk, everything has to be fantastic all the time. etc. etc. The most important thing is, I guess, to be in the moment, and understand that you are two in the moment. That even though you suddenly feel detached (triggered by a feeling of sickness, sadness, depression or whatever makes you conscious about yourself in the situation), it doesn't necessarily mean that the relationship is bad. Perhaps these triggers make us aware that we're all subjects who can never really know if others feel like we do, that makes the spiral go on and on? I don't know. But I can lie without sleep about this, feeling a knot in my stomach, making me feel guilty for not being intuitive enough. I can sometimes get the same feeling in formal social situations, so the link to social anxiety isn't that far fetched at all! But I think the main issue is something between the idea of our own subjective feelings/thoughts, in relation to other's. The freedom of always being able to be somewhere else mentally, than where you actually are physically. 

Hey, I honestly beleive that what your going through is really bad anxiety. My partner suffers from it alot and is currently on various types of medicatfor this including sleeping tablets to help him sleep as he can never seem to switch off. It started off the same with him. We've bin together three years now and he has been so dough better after telling his doctor exactly how he felt n he also told me. Communication is the key and he is now happier than ever and nearly finished his medication, fantastic what some medication n healthy lifestyle can do to a person. Plenty of exercise, fresh air can also help. Hope my advice was helpfull. :-)

This thing called love and why we feel sick!  ***this post is edited by moderator *** *** web addresses not allowed***Please read our Terms of Use PLEASE DON'T BOTHER WITH DOCTORS, they don't know a shit about "being in love". When two people are in love it's deeper than your bodies and you mind... You need to know more check the link above and ask questions. Happy to help!

ive been dating my current girlfriend for roughly 3 weeks, although i had liked her for some time before that, when we had started datingm i kissed her, and i was fine, but the second time i saw her, i had kissed her and then i got this feeling that i had something stuck in my throat, and then i really had to throw up. the third time i've seen her, it happened again, i was fine for a few hours, but then i just had to throw up, i didnt feel sick, nothing was wrong with me. i just had to throw up. I think of her all the time, but when i acctually get near her, i feel nervous, and then eventually sick. we are 17, and her dad isn't letting her date anyone, so we have to hide it, which means, i cant call or go over to her house that often. But when i am able to talk to her, i feel content, like it feels right.  i dont know what to do, does anyone have some helpful tips to get over this feeling, i never had it with anyone else. i tried just about everything in my power to get over it, with no prevail.

I Am also sick around my girlfriend well was We both met each other in october last year it was great i got with her in december and it was instantly love at first sight (I know that's hard to say but i knew she was the one for me) i truely loved this girl with all my heart could not have asked for a better relationship Everyday had a smile on my face The relationship was amazing for about 9 months Then one day i decided to take her to McDonalds and for some strange reason i just felt sick and i was fine all day untill that point we were heading back to my house and i was just sick on the way back home about 3-4 times And from that day onwards everyday i was alone with her i was being sick Till the point i ended it I hate myself for ending it but it was not fair on her at all me being sick all the time and i know she blamed herself for it I loved this girl with all my heart and still do to this day. I Just miss the days we were soo happy i just wish i could go back to them days Anyone know how i may sort this out I wuld very much apprichate it